Chapter 12
My Darkness
I know what happened. Or I want to know. I just don't get this. What made these charms dark. I can't ask anyone. Everyone left in Jewelland is gone and I've come to terms with that. I can't think of any way to get back. That was a power of those from this land that chose themselves. I lack any power alone. Let alone a way to communicate with closed charms.
These charms have sat together for a few days. The darkness has some light mixed in. I feel a connection, but only to that light. It feels like a heat you feel deep within. Maybe it's the jewel pets in the charms. They can sense each other. They give each other power to see through darkness. It's really a touching thing when you think so deeply about it. I can't even find the truth of what I'm doing, so maybe this just means I've truly lost it this time.
I would like to think of myself as a simple pet, of which I am not. A simple bunny with thoughts that were null and lacking the complexity of an expansive life. Instead, I have two people that have adopted me. Not as a pet, but as a child. Rose once said a few years ago, "You know Luea, you are like family to us now. You are our second child. And you too have jewels in your eyes like our little wolf of a boy."
They gave me pendent on my birthday one year. It had the word family engraved on it. I've always worn it. Steven once told me, "You and Korun are not siblings. Your heart knows a lot of this. You are both cared for by Rejuvenation… er… I mean Rose. She knows a lot more of people from your land. We take you guys as our children because we can't have kids together. In a sense, we are too different, but love binds us strongly."
I felt bad about that, yet I also feel curious. I know they are hiding something. I hide a lot about myself too. I should represent truth for once. I don't even know why I stayed here with Korun. It isn't my duty. I could've left, but I didn't. I wanted to. That's a lie. I never wanted to leave. I know why I stayed, so I lied to myself again. I can't help but lie to myself. Damn me! I can't find a way to say it or accept it. I need Garnet. She never escaped from Jewelland though. I have to go back.
Jewelland, I'm coming. I am returning home. I know Garnet can help! Wait. Is anything left? Yes? No? Can I get home? The worries came flooding back.
I should go to sleep for the night. That should help me calm down. Everything faded and I think I began to see images of a dark and lifeless sky. The clouds were black. The sun was gray. I let the sudden rush of exhaustion fill my tired body and lead me to sleep.
