No clouds, no rain, none. Just the full moon and the stars looking upon us. A smile was constantly on my face, I felt free, jumping from rooftop to rooftop like that. And at the same time I felt like an idiot. Smiling like I was experiencing something incredible, something that only happens once in a life time. Turns out that it wasn't, it was just an ordinary patrol.
But it still felt incredible.
"You're in a good mood tonight" Leo calls out, causing me to skid to a stop, the smile turns into a smirk and I turn around.
"Aren't I always?" I reply with a snicker. Leo sighs in fake annoyance and shakes his head.
"Really happy" He says, emphasising the 'really'. Because I wasn't happy before, I was from the inside, but not from the inside.
"Wasn't that the whole plan?" I throw back at him. "C'mon" I yell, turning around and running away again. Soon I can hear footsteps following me over the rooftops and the same stupid smile appears on my face again. I willed my legs to go faster, jumping over every rooftop with ease. I let out a laugh, the wind rushing past me.
10 minutes later, after stopping two robberies, I found myself standing at the ledge of the building, staring at the sky above me.
"Aren't you happy?" Leo asks, raising his voice a little but it wasn't out of anger. It was disbelieve. And I sigh at his comment, the statement still fresh in my mind. But I already knew the information, I just choose to ignore it. It was easier that way. But Leo knew that I had to confront it one day, preferably very soon.
"Donnie almost finished the portal"
"I am happy Leo, I want to go back home.." I say, sitting down on the edge of the rooftop. "It's just… " I start, biting my lip softly with hesitation.
"I dream about home every night, I see their faces, I see dad. And I always think about how much they'd miss me. I want to go back so badly every day. To see them again but…" I take a deep breath, ignoring Leo shuffling closer to me. "I've changed Leo, and I'm not sure if they'll like the new me"
There was a short, soft and barely noticeable, intake of breath. But then Leo breathes out a laugh, walking up to me and sitting down on the same roof, barely an inch apart.
"You're worried that they aren't going to like you?"
"Exactly! I couldn't change in the past because… they counted on me to crack jokes." I turn to him, a frown on my face. "In case you haven't noticed it Leo, I haven't cracked a joke in these past 3 weeks."
"You haven't, and we haven't fallen apart either. We've tolerated you so far" Leo retorts, and I huff slightly, turning away from him.
"That's just because you're insufferable" I mumble, knowing full well that Leo still heard it.
"Ouch little bro" Leo grins, punching my shoulder lightly. "I'm a grown man, you're not"
I let out an exaggerated sigh. "You're 5 years older than me, heck you've only been allowed to drink for 5 months now" I exclaim before I calm down a bit, my eyes narrowing slightly. "Where is this conversation going?"
"I don't know, you tell me" Leo grins at me and this time I'm the one punching the shoulder. "But in all seriousness, I get where you're coming from but you're still their little brother. They'll like you" he says, nudging my shoulder slightly.
I sigh, hanging my head low. "I thought I knew them Leo.. but right now I have no idea how they're gonna react" there is a short silence and Leo firmly plants his hand on my shoulder, squeezing it softly.
"It's something getting used to, and obviously you're still searching but you're still you, just a little different. But they will still love you. I promise"
TMNT
"Again" Leo says sternly, standing there with arms crossed.
"Oh c'mon, we've been at it for an hour" I whine, struggling to my feet. Leo just gives me a dubious look and I quickly oblige, getting to my feet in a record time.
"You can walk out of here anytime soon" He tells me and Raph immediately leans towards me.
"I wouldn't do that. My muscles are still dying from the punishment fearless gave me 4 months ago for pulling that stunt" He tells me with a snicker and I groan in response, getting ready once again. My feet firmly planted on the dojo floor.
"Can you at least tell me what I do wrong? Last time I checked I landed just like you did" I say, crossing my arms at Leo.
"You weren't fluent, in real battle you would've been caught" He tells me and I throw my hands in the air.
"How did you even..!" I yell in fake-annoyance but I don't actually finish my sentence. "Besides my jump was just fine."
"If you insist" Leo shrugs, crouching down slightly, ready to attack. "Onegai Shimasu" He yells, and charges at me. Really he wasn't even trying, he wasn't even giving all he had. And I jumped, just like I had practiced over the last hour. And within a second of being airborne I felt something connect with my plastron. I gasp, landing harshly on the ground and coming to a stop.
"It's not fluent" Leo says with unquestionable authority and I groan, coming to my feet once again.
"Then tell me Leo! I know that you're hiding the answer from me, you want me to figure it out for myself but I don't know okay?! I don't know, I didn't know an hour ago, and I still don't know it 'kay?" I yell, my fingers itching with frustration. In front of me Leo sighs and walks up to me. He waits for a second and I stare at him, before he puts a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"You know this move" He states and I nod, a little annoyed right now.
"Yea, dad taught us when we were 9. But apparently I'm not doing it right, and that's why you're trying to teach me" I mutter.
"Not just this move" He states, like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "You learned this move when you were 9, it's a simple yet effective technique, if used properly."
"You know.. " I mumble. "Why won't you tell me? I thought you wanted to help me get better"
"You've only been training with us for 4 days Mikey, don't expect change to soon" He tells me. "Clearly you have a lot of things to work on. Everyone is different Mikey, everyone's a different ninja. During sparring you can see that Don's offensive attacks are different than Raph's. Or even mine."
"But what does that have to do with me?"
"Everyone has a different style Mikey. The technique you're using is taught by Splinter, and you haven't made it yours yet. It doesn't fit you. It's too controlled, and you're thinking about it too much. I bet you even have some kind of song or melody to perform the kata" I frown at him, it was true what he said but it still confused the heck out of me.
"Me? Thinking too much?" I ask in disbelief and Raph snickers from the side-line.
"I couldn't believe it either squirt" He laughs and I glare at him.
"Stop thinking about it, find your way to perform those kata's." Leo tells me, completely ignoring my question, or Raph's comment. He takes his hand off my shoulder, taking a few steps back. "Don't think too much about it, just follow what feels right." He tells me, getting ready to attack me.
"Again"
TMNT
Don't get me wrong, I was still worried sick. Anxious if Don could actually create a machine that would bring me back, if my family even received the letter in the first place, never being able to see this family again, my family, and me having changed over the last three weeks. I was still feeling all of it, but it had been pushed down.
Joy and pride dominating the fear.
Everyone, minus Michelangelo, was sitting around the table. April had cooked us dinner, a big one because we didn't know when would be the last one. Don almost finished the portal and once it proved to be working.. well y'know. So we decided to have one big dinner. Everyone minus Michelangelo was there, a new family.
Well except Angel, who was already sleeping in the room next door. Shadow however was definitely joining the dinner, and for some reason she had chosen me as her chair. Y'know, instead of Donnie, instead of her 'favourite uncle'. But in her defence, even she knew the reason behind the dinner. And she was smart enough to put two and two together.
Two hours later, when everyone had finished dinner, Leo, Raph, Donnie and Casey all got ready for patrol, but I didn't feel like going tonight. I had been on patrol for three whole weeks right now. It was different to say at least. Serious.. no jokes were cracked throughout the night. But we kept the city safe. Albeit from muggers and robbers, but still.
"Why didn't you go?" April asks me, walking back into the living room with a sleeping Angel in her arms. I shrug slightly, doing my best not to jostle Shadow too much.
"I didn't feel like it. I'm sure Leo told you about our conversation" I reply and April nods, sitting down in the chair and making herself comfortable.
"He did. And I understand." She tells me, looking at Angel with a smile, and I'm glad that she doesn't push it. "You know that they are going to miss you." She laughs softly, gesturing to Angel and Shadow. I smile as well, looking down at Shadow, who was now fully leaning against my shoulder and desperately trying to stay awake.
"Yea me too" I mumble back, stroking her blond hair softly. She mumbles slightly and snuggles closer to me.
"Still, you have the other April" April said with a grin, and I give her a dubious look.
"You're suggesting your own 17 year old counterpart to get pregnant?" I ask mockingly, emphasising the age.
April snickers. "Maybe not. But who knows, maybe in a few years." She shakes her head, laughing at herself. "I feel like a worried parent, but tell her to wait for the right one. And tell her to stay open-minded. I never thought I'd marry Casey, or even like him in the first place."
"Are you talking about Casey or Donnie..?" I ask, not really serious but still quite interested what she had to say about the whole 'April, Casey and Don' thing. I had told her after all, how Don had a crush on April, and Casey as well. But so far, she hasn't given her opinion.
"Not every dimension is similar Mikey, remember that" She smiles, giving me a playful wink.
I snicker. "We're not talking about April anymore, aren't we?"
"I wouldn't know" She laughs, clearly enjoying the conversation. But somehow it was clear that she was talking about both. Both April's decision, and me being able to prevent this from happening.
And I want to reply again, to continue the conversation but suddenly I can sense something, immediately my body stiffens and my eyes scan the apartment rapidly.
"Sorry" A whisper comes from the staircase. I immediately turn towards the source of the sound, frowning as I see Michelangelo standing there.
"Sorry that I didn't join dinner.. I just…" He stops, looking down at his feet. He looks ashamed, out of place and uncomfortable. And I feel bad, bad for him feeling that way. April smiles sadly.
"You're here now.. the guys won't be back for another 2 hours." She whispers, pausing for a second. "There's always a place for you Michelangelo." The latter looks up, uncertainty in his eyes but he doesn't move.
"Hey hon" I whisper softly in Shadow's ears. She blinks softly, looking at me with confusion in her tired eyes. "Uncle Mikey is here. Do you want him to put you to bed?" Despite the tiredness in her eyes she seems to brighten at the comment. While Michelangelo had seen Shadow countless times, Shadow had rarely seen Mikey.
She nods and slides off the couch, making her way towards Michelangelo. The latter seems confused as Shadow walks up to him, tensing significantly and looking over to me. I give him an encouraging nod, one he does not return. But at least he doesn't non-verbally threaten to kill me, so I call it a win. Instead he bends down carefully and picks Shadow up.
"Story?" Shadow asks hopefully as they start walking towards her room and Michelangelo snorts.
"Brat"
The tiny bit of happiness present in his voice. Not to mention the squeal-like laugh Shadow lets out.
