Zuko knows he shouldn't be listening to their conversation, but the opportunity presents itself as he pulls his hood tightly around his face. Who wouldn't want to hear at least a snippet about their ex's life? He tells himself he just wants to be sure that Mai is happy. He is also curious if she has found someone. He wouldn't mind hearing about that as long as they aren't too specific. He forgets that Mai happens to be talking to Ty Lee a few tables over from him at the tea shop.
And he has no idea that Ty Lee has the scoop on his current girlfriend's ex-boyfriend. Oh, what a tangled spider-snake web they weave.
Mai sounds as thrilled as a cobra-sloth. That is, until Ty Lee's tale starts unraveling. Zuko thinks he might come undone, too.
"I dunno, Mai, Aang is just so… so… powerful." She lets out a breathy sigh.
"You're talking about the kid with the arrows." Mai intones.
"He's not a kid. He's a man. Very much a man. With impressive girth. I can barely wrap my hand around—"
"OK, Ty, I get it. You can spare me the details."
Zuko hopes his own relief at Mai's response isn't too audible as he makes a half-hum, half-blowing noise like a buzzard wasp. It always stings a little bit to think about any advantage the Avatar might have over him. Well, aside from the whole four-element thing, of course. He knows he can satisfy Katara, and that she's never been attracted to Aang, but what if the airbending master decides to show off his... assets?
Ty Lee doesn't seem to take the hint. "And such flexibility, too. Oh, and endurance. Sometimes when it's me and Ty Lat and Ty Lao—"
Zuko coughs. And vows that Katara will never go near Aang again.
Mai flinches at the sound just as she cuts Ty Lee off again. "That's nice. I'm glad you've perfected your circus act. But sometimes, Ty, what happens backstage, should stay backstage."
"What about you, Mai? It was a pretty nasty breakup with Zuko. And then that rebound relationship with Kei Lo. Have you found anyone, yet?"
"Well, I joined a bounty-hunting team. The work is busy, so there's not much time for romantic pursuits."
Zuko knows about this venture since he set Mai up with June a few months ago. She needed a little spice in her life, he figured. Somewhere along the way, they pick up Jet, that asinine freedom fighter from the Earth Kingdom. Zuko concedes that if rounding up war criminals gave them all a sense of purpose, then why not kill two sparrowkeets with one stone?
"But what about that strawman? He was dreamy!" Ty Lee tweets.
"Strawman?"
"Umm, Ace? No, Flyboy?"
"You mean Jet."
"Oooh, right. I'd sure like to get him backstage. His aura was so dark, though. I wonder about propulsion with that one. Mmmm, jetstream." Ty Lee giggles.
Zuko suppresses a groan. He should have left a long time ago. There is no easy escape now, though.
"You're… just…" Mai lets out a noise of exasperation. "Well, I wouldn't know."
"Come on, Mai. Don't tell me you didn't? Not even once? You guys have been traveling together for months."
"Not with that assface, no."
Zuko isn't sure why, but he catches on immediately. It takes Ty Lee a few beats.
"Ohhhhhhhhhh! I knew you were with someone. It's written all over your aura."
"I will say one thing." Mai shifts in her seat to glance over her shoulder. "June is way better than Zuko ever was."
A/N: I'm not trying to make Ty Lee out to be a slut or anything. I just rewatched Return to Omashu where she is first introduced, and she is adorable! But I think she would be more open and free about sexuality, embracing it as part of human nature and not some hush-hush topic. Or I could totally imagine her as a sex-therapist in a modern-day AU.
So, the Mai-June pairing idea came from none other than QueenTyZula who challenges me to think outside my Zutara box. Mai, June, and Jet as a bounty-hunting team comes from Emletish because she is my ultimate Zutara inspiration. Like I said in Young Love Part I, you never forget your first.
