Song: So Long-Ingrid Michealson
April
"I can't concentrate when you're doing that," I whispered to Remus beside me at the table in the Library where I had read the same sentence about 20 times.
"Oh sorry," He smirked but continued to rub his hand up and down my thigh each time going a little higher. Glaring slightly I pushed his hand off and put mine on his, two can play at that game. Smirking I ran it up and twisted slightly so my fingers went to his inner thigh. Jumping, I saw him gulp and put his hand over mine linking our finger.
"Better," I smiled and turned back to my potions notes studying, but found that I had lost all concentration now. "Alright now what?" I laughed turning to him.
"Well no one is up in the dorm right now so how about we go there?" Not even replying I just gathered my books and slipped them into my bag.
Walking into the dorm it was its normal messy self and I walked over to his bed seeing clothing scattered all around. "Wow," I smirked pulling a sock off the canopy of the bed.
Snatching it back, he threw it down on the floor and quickly kicked the other various clothing under the bed. I hopped up onto it, laughing, and moved up near the pillow patting the space beside me. Crawling up beside me he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and I leaned my head again his shoulder.
Biting my lip, I decided to bring up a question I had been pondering for some time. "So Remus what do you see happening between us?"
"Well Addie I'd like to stay with you for a very long time," He responded after a couple seconds.
"What about when Sirius and I move away?"
"I'll find you somehow. We've almost got the whole trip planned down to the exact moment." He ran his fingers through my hair. "After graduation James and I intend to go through the places until we get to you."
"Are you sure you love me that much?" I smirked looking up at him.
"Nah its Sirius I intend to find you're just an extra little bonus." He smiled leaning down and kissing me.
"Ha-ha," rolled my eyes. "I love you Remus.
"I Love you too Adhara Black," He smiled.
oOo
I had received a letter the morning after that saying that I was expected home for Easter Break which was unexpected. Usually Sirius and I stayed at Hogwarts for that break roaming the pretty much empty castle. Sirius didn't receive a letter so he didn't have to, but as the protective big brother he was, he was coming. Which lead us all here on the train to London on the 12th of April for a week.
Sighing I leaned my head on Remus' shoulder and closed my eyes as the three started talking about some prank and Remus read a book. I felt him shift a little bit and his arm wrapped around my back making more comfortable for not only me but him. I felt his lips press to the top of my head but seconds later I let myself drift off.
oOo
"Wake up," someone shook my shoulder. Opening my eyes, they focus on Remus, "We're here."
"Alright, where's everyone else" I whispered and he helped me stand up.
"Getting trunks, now remember to be careful," he took my by the shoulders.
"I know," I smiled softly up at him as he leaned down kissing me sweetly. Pushing up slightly I deepened the kiss caressing the side of his face. Pulling back he had a slight crooked smile, "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too," I wrapped my arms around him hugging tightly which he returned lifting me up slightly. "Love you."
"Love you too." He whispered just as the door opened revealing Sirius.
"Come on we need to go," He held out his hand. Nodding I pulled away and went out into the corridor grabbing my trunk and walked off the train with him.
Just like Christmas break Rabastan was standing with my family, "Hello," I greeted him and he leaned down giving a small kiss.
"Hello Adhara," he stated when he pulled back. "We'll be having dinner with my family again so come along." Handing Sirius my trunk I saw a little fear in his eyes probably picking up on my own, something didn't feel right about this. Taking his arm there instantly was a pull near my belly button and we landed on Rabastans front lawn.
"Who all is coming?" I questioned and he glanced down.
"My parents, brother, Bella, Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy , my friend Travers. You remember him right?" He looked down as we entered the doors and once I nodded he continued naming people I had mostly heard of. "Also you will be meeting a very special person tonight so again you'll need to freshen up."
Suddenly my stomach twisted into a knot as I realized where I had heard all the names they were all suspected Death Eaters. "Fane!" Rabastan shouted and the house elf popped up, "take Adhara to my room to get dressed I have some arrangements that still need to be made and Adhara I would also like for you to wear the jewelry I got you for Christmas."
"It's in my trunk," I whispered.
"Alright Fane I'll also need you to run over to the blacks and bring back her trunk."
"Yes Master," Fane nodded and took a few steps waiting for me to follow.
When we got there I waiting patiently before he closed the door before collapsing onto the bed, gripping tightly at the cover I closed my eyes but wouldn't let the tears from fear escape. "I can do this," I whispered as my fingers brushed over a smooth material.
The dress was shorter than the last one and a bit more my age made of black tulle with a belt of floral appliqués around the waist to define it. There was a satin tube dress under that hit a bit above my knee but the tulle came down to just above my ankle. Then to form the one-shoulder design the tulle came up and twisted at the top before going back down on the other side. Overall it was a pretty dress, one that I would pick out.
There was a small knock on the door and I walked over opening it to see Fane with my trunk. "Thank you," I whispered which seemed to surprise him a bit.
"Is there anything else you need Miss. Black?" He questioned.
"Could I have something to drink and possibly a snack I didn't get to eat anything on the train. Anything is fine."
"Of course Miss," He bowed his head slightly and turned disappearing. Just leaving the door open I wheeled my trunk by the bed and opened it going through my things until I got to the bottom and pulled out the covered jewels. Just then Fane reappeared with a tray of foods and a pitcher with a glass. "Here you are."
"Thank you, you can just put them down there." I gave a small smile at the younger house elf. He did as I said then waited patiently to see if I wanted anything else, "That's all."
"Just call if you need anything." He gave a tiny smile, the first in probably a long while and popped out of the room closing the door. Walking over to the tray I saw that he brought a cut up apple and an assortment of cheeses along with what appeared to be a juice of some sort. Gladly I ate and drank for a little bit until it was time to get ready. I walked into the bathroom and quickly curled my hair with my wand knowing that since it was a magical household that I wouldn't get busted for using magic. Then I pinned it to the side letting my hair drape over my shoulder opposite the shoulder of the dress, quickly I put on some powder, eyeliner, a little eye shadow and mascara then went out to change.
The dress draped nicely over my fame and the black platform heels added about 4 inches to my height. Walking over to the mirror I clasped the necklace and bracelet around my neck and wrist then added the ring. Looking up I saw a different person, a person that would actually fit into this society, I saw Adhara Walburga Black not Addie 'Wings' Black; I wanted to be Addie.
Suddenly there was a loud knock and I jumped slightly and turned to see it open. Rabastan smiled actually when he saw me, "You look fantastic."
"Thank you," I whispered.
"People will be arriving soon," He walked over and stood behind me looking into the mirror. He was in semi-formal wizard robes that had tiny pinstriped down the jacket and pants. Turning around his hands went to my waist and I looked hard at our reflection. We really did match as Adhara and Rabastan, in looks that is, which was important in the pure blood society. We would make the perfect couple by those standards, but by normal standards of getting married we were nothing alike. He didn't know a single thing about me nor I, him. "Come," He started pulling away and holding out his arm to take.
oOo
I watched as people walked around the sitting room Rabastan was off talking to someone and I was alone. "Hello Addie," Cissy came over handing me a glass of something, "there's a little bit of Firewhiskey in there it will help."
"Thank you," I whispered and took a sip cringing slightly when it burned my throat.
"I know how hard it is being here," She whispered coming closer to me. "Though I'm not sure I would have been able to take it at 16. I was 20 when I was first introduced to him." She took a drink from her glass. I looked down at the ground trying to picture what he might look like, what he might do. "Addie calm down," she reached out and steadied my hands which I hadn't noticed where shaking slightly. "Just remember to do what they say, and stick to the rules."
"Thank you Cissy," I whispered as Bellatrix walked over to us.
"What are you girlies doing over here?" She cocked her head to the side giving herself a slightly crazed look, but then again that wasn't hard for her.
"Hello, Bella." Cissy said to her oldest sister.
"Hello, Bella." I looked at her when suddenly there was a loud crack signaling that someone had apparated.
"Oh goodie this should be fun," She sneered at me and walked away. Cissy quickly took my drink, which I had wished I'd drank more of, and we walked over to the men. Taking Rabastan's arm we moved to the front of the crowd and watched as the door creaked open. Fear crept up my spine as I was underage, surrounded with Death Eaters, and the most terrifying wizard slowly walked through the door. Summoning all the Gryffindor courage I had in my body I straightened my shoulders and put on a straight face as a pale man walked through the door. He had on relatively similar clothing as Rabastan though pure black. He had black hair though, his skin was deathly pale. He was tall but skeletally frail looking, with almost non appearent, thin lips. Suddenly his eyes turned to me and internally I gasped slightly since they were scarlet red.
"Well, well, well." He gave a sort of creepy smile and I saw that his teeth were almost pointed. "Looks like the girl made it home from school after all." He stalked forward standing within a few feet of me.
"Master this is Adhara Black," Rabastan spoke and His head turned to Rabastan and then back to me. He held up his hand and I saw his boney fingers with sharply pointed fingernails. Keeping a straight face felt as he took my face in his hand turning this way and that. "How old are you?" He questioned letting go of my face.
"Sixteen since November 16th," I replied in a steady voice.
"Well you are very pretty, nice pick Rabastan." He said and a small scoff was heard behind me. Suddenly his eyes flicked to behind me in a move that reminded me more of a snake than a person. "Who did that? Was it you Bellatrix?"
"Yes Master, I'm very sorry," She conceded.
"Come here," I heard her heeled boots click across the floor up beside me. I saw him roughly take her chin and point it at me but didn't dare look. "Do you not think Adhara here is pretty?"
"Yes Master," She whispered.
"Still a little jealous are you?" He questioned after a few minutes examining her features. With an evil laugh then just let her go, walking away. Taking it as a cue she walked back to her place, "Well what do you say to dinner Adhara?" He held out his arm like a proper gentleman should, which didn't fit his appearance at all. Rabastan instantly dropped his and was surprised at the little sense of betrayal I felt, but didn't react to it. Walking forward I wrapped mine around His and suppressed the shiver that went down my spine as we walked into the Dining room. He pulled out the chair beside him for me to sit while he took the head and Rabastan took the seat next to me. Suddenly I felt someone stabbing at the wall in my mind that I had learn to put up when I turned 10. "I see you're very skilled at Occlumency," He smirked revealing his sharp teeth.
"Yes, it was taught at a young age in our family," I stated as food appeared in front of us.
"I'm curious Adhara, how is your family?" He asked taking a bite of the food and I found myself thinking it weird of this strange looking man eating the same food at myself.
"Mother and Father are well so are my two brothers," I took a sip of my drink feeling that if I took a bite I might throw up.
"I heard that you had a twin."
"Yes, Sirius is my twin, Regulus is one year younger."
"Sirius is the one Bella has been talking about, friends with a blood traitor and mudblood."
"Yes, Sirius has developed some different ways of thinking," I nodded keeping a straight face.
"How do you feel Adhara?" He asked and I felt another stab at my wall.
"I believe I have yet to grow." I looked up at him. After questioning me he continued eating and talked mostly to other people. Throughout the night I continued to feel stabs in my brain though by him or someone else or both I do not know. By 10 o'clock he left along with everyone else.
"You did a great job tonight, Adhara," Rabastan came up behind me placing his hands on my waist.
"I tried my best, Rabastan," I whispered and he turned me around pressing my body against his.
"I need to get you back to your parents home," He commented and I felt his hands slid up my sides. "But maybe first we should have some fun." My stomach twisted into a knot along with everything else inside me as I instinctually started to pull away. He must have saw something in my eyes because he stopped, "Adhara what is the furthest you've gone with a guy?"Looking down at his chest I felt a tiny blush go to my cheeks, "Answer me," he lost all emotion from his voice stepping away from me.
"Your kiss on Halloween night was my first," I said telling the truth and hoping to avoid an actual answer.
Instantly he dropped his hands and a sort of pleased look replaced the emotionless stare. "I'm going to take you home now," He took my hand as fane brought my trunk down which contained my clothing from before. Within minutes I was standing on the steps of my home with him. "Goodnight," He said and leaned down giving me a kiss though this time it was a bit softer than his usual ones.
"Goodnight," I nodded and opened the door walking in. Kreacher automatically popped up, "can you take my trunk up to my room? I'm going to stay up for a little while more."
"Is there anything else you need?" He asked.
"No, you can go to bed," I muttered and he popped away. Instantly I took my shoes off and started up the stairs passing Regulus', and my room going to Sirius. I didn't even have to knock as he opened the door and pulled me inside. Immediately I wrapped my arms around him and buried my face in his chest.
"What happened?" I whispered closing the door
"I saw him, I met him, I talked to him," I rushed out and he hugged me reaching out and grabbing one of his old shirts.
"Here," He whispered moving back and dug around in the drawers pulling out an old pair of plaid pants which probably didn't even fit him anymore. He turned around and I slipped them on along with the shirt after taking off the dress. I closed my eyes sitting on the edge of the bed and felt him take my arm, for some reason his hand was cold and I jerked away reminded of the snake like man. "Why do they do this to you?" He whispered and pulled back the covers so I could get inside tucking them up around me, "Go to sleep you're safe now."
oOo
"I'm going to kill them," I raspy voice laughed out in the darkness. Whipping around towards where I thought it was coming from I saw nothing but darkness. "I'm going to kill every single one," whipping my head around again I saw a pair of scarlet eyes.
My eyes shot open but I didn't move, scared stiff, "Prongs, I'm not sure what to do. What if they take her before we have everything planned?" Sirius spoke and I looked over to his chair by the window to see him speaking in his mirror as the sun rose.
"Padfoot, we have at least the first few steps planned if something happens you guys can leave." James responded.
"You don't understand how scared she was when she got here. She's been tossing and turning all night…"
"I would imagine so, he's been rumored to be changed by the dark magic."
"I wasn't just that, we both know she doesn't get scared by appearances it was something different."
"He didn't cast anything on her did he?" James questioned and I saw Sirius visibly tense and took it as my cue to 'wake up'. Sitting up I saw his head turn to me and give a small smile.
"She woke up; I'll talk to you later." He said as I rubbed my eyes.
"Bye," James spoke and Sirius put the mirror down.
"So are you going to tell me what happened?"
"Alright," I sat up against the headboard and he moved onto the bed as I retold what happened that night except for the haunting dream.
oOo
The rest of the break I pretty much stayed to Sirius' side, I'm not sure if it was for comfort or to make sure he wouldn't get hurt. Every night I had the same dream of the red eyes and the voice in the distance which caused dark circles under my eyes. We both arrived early at the station with my parents Rabastan and Regulus and had the normal goodbye and got on the train while people were still arriving. Curling up in the corner near the window I was reminded of my last trip back to Hogwarts but out of the corner of my eye I saw Sirius sit down and it brought me back.
"Try to sleep Addie," He whispered knowing the trouble I had been having, though still not why.
"Can't," I whispered and leaning my head against the window. About 20 minutes later the door slid open then closed and Sirius said hello.
"Hi, Sirius," James said giving a small sigh at the end. "Hi Addie," He added and I just nodded watching as my breath fogged up the window.
"Where are Remus and Peter?" Sirius asked.
"Remus was saying goodbye to his Mum and Dad, as usual she's worried about him. Peter I'm not sure about haven't seen him. Does Remus know…?" Figuring that he was looking at me I shook my head no.
"She hasn't even been out of bed much," Sirius said and I flipped my head to him glaring. "Well you haven't!" Huffing I turned back to the window setting my chin on my knees.
"Hi," Remus said opening the door, "what happened?" He questioned evidentially catching the atmosphere of the cabin.
"Want me to tell him?" Sirius asked and I just nodded my head as the cushion shifted slightly. I closed my eyes and Sirius told exactly what I had told him word for word everything he knew. The train started shifting pulling out of the station to go back to my real home. I felt a hand on my shoulder and jerked away uncontrollably. Turning my head I saw Remus sitting there looking at me. "Sorry," I whispered.
"It's ok," He gave a tiny smile.
oOo
"Tonight's the full moon," Sirius said as I was curled up in the chair two days after we got back to school.
"Oh I'll get ready," I said standing up and he stood in front of me.
"No, we all decided you need to stay in tonight. I just thought I would tell you," He chewed on the inside of his lip.
"Alright," I nodded and sat down in the chair staring at the fire. Someone knelt down in front of me thinking it was still Sirius I just kept my eyes on the fire until they took my chin forcing my face to them. Suddenly I flashed back to when He did that and jerked my face away.
"Look at me," the person whispered and I slowly turned my face to look into Remus' eyes. "I have to go, but you're worrying me."
"I'm fine Remus," I whispered
"No you're not," He laid his hand on mine. Looking around I saw some people watching and slid my hand back not knowing if they would gossip and if they gossiped someone bad could figure out and then He would.
"Go," I turned my head and he sighed standing and walking out of the room. Standing up I watched out the window, waiting for Madam Pomfrey to escort him to the Shack then returned. About 10 minutes later Sirius, James and Peter snuck by walking towards the tree and I watched as the moon rose over the horizon cracking open the window I heard screams then howls fill the night igniting the rumors of the haunted shack. Looking down at the ground a slight flash caught my eye and I saw long red hair and a lantern. "No," I whispered and took off up to the dorms to see Alice.
"Where's Lily?" I asked and she looked up.
"Umm, I think she just left on patrols…" Racing out of the room and out of the dorm I quickly headed down and out of the castle.
"Something doesn't feel right, something isn't right." I kept thinking over and over in my head. I quickly headed over to the tree sprinting at full speed just in time to see a black dog limping out of the tunnel.
Running over he transformed sitting down on the ground, "What happened?"
"He's out there, when he didn't remember who he was Peter freaked out and ran out of the room and lead him straight to the tunnel which he escaped through. James and I tried to stop him but he threw both of us back. James is fine, and I think it's just a sprain, he could have done so much more I think he's deep in there." Through this whole thing I started hyperventilating, "calm down Addie."
"Lily's out here," I rushed out and sprinted away running up a rock and jumping transforming in mid air and flying. "Please no," I said in my head.
"Addie?" Peter squeaked out and I zoned my eyes in on the voice beneath the trees.
"Do you know what you've done!" I screeched out swooping down and he scurried closer to the trunk of a tree.
"I'm sorry!"
"I'll deal with you later, where are they."
"That way," He turned his head to the side.
Quickly I took off, it took just meer seconds to hear a loud growl. Swooping down I saw James standing protectively in front of Lily with Remus trying to snap at them. Letting out a loud screech his head turned and I quickly turned getting just out of reach.
"Addie!" James screamed in my head.
"Get her out of here!" He hesitated looked between us, "NOW!" Turning around I screeched again drawing Remus' attention as James nudged Lily with his nose. Quickly she got the clue and started slowly backing away until I got Remus' full attention and then she took off with James right behind her. "Hey!" I yelled into the werewolf's head, "You can't leave Remus; I know you're there!" Shaking his head he growled baring his teeth as I landed on a high branch. "What? Don't like it?" I glared inside as he shook his head. "Remus come back to me!" I screamed and again the werewolf shook his head like he was clearing his thoughts. "Remus!" I screamed but he just growled jumping, I needed to jolt him forward or something and that when I did the possibly stupidest thing ever. I transformed back into a human.
"Wake Up!" I screamed out to him at the top of my lungs and I saw him rush the tree now wanting me even more. "Do you really want to kill me Remus?" I yelled down at him holding onto the branch as he pushed on the tree. "Look at me!" I screamed as he rushed the tree again and I slipped and I tried to transform again but just as I was about to do it I crashed into a branch and head a loud snap in my arm and let out a loud cry as pain shot through it.
Next I fell the 15 or so feet to the hard dirt floor of the forest. Grimacing, I flipped onto my back and saw wolfish qualities, closing my eyes I waited for the pain until the nose nudged my cheek. Opening my eyes slightly I saw that he had backed off a little bit and I sat up holding my broken arm to my body, "You're back?" I whispered and he nodded slightly. Standing up I winced slightly when I put weight on my ankle and he whined slightly, "I'm ok."
Stepping forward I heard a vicious growl behind me as a big black dog walked forward with a slight limp still. Remus sunk back and the Sirius cocked his head to the side like he was hearing something and I figured that they were communicating and Remus' sunk more inside himself. Sirius turned around and looked at me holding my arm while leaning against a tree. "It's just a sprain," I commented about my ankle standing up and putting pressure on it. His nose flicked up to the arm, "that's broken." Remus whined a little bit. Biting my lip I took a small step and then another walking towards him. Sirius let out a growl warning me, "tell me if anything happens," I whispered and he gave a little nod.
"Ya, know seeing you with Owl eyes and seeing you with human eyes are," I gave a small smile stepping forward again. "It's strange but you're still you," I took another step forward putting me about 4 feet away. Again he growled but I saw the humanity in his eyes, "you aren't going to scare me." Lifting up the bottom of my shirt I cradled my arm with it and reached out my other one. Taking a deep breath as he bared his teet. "Stop," I glared and he immediately stopped as I touched his neck.
A twig snapped and he immediately moved in front of me, smiling slightly I spoke "It's just James." Moving my hand to his back I ran it through his course hair as James stepped through the trees. Then I noticed a tiny brown rat on his back and I glared, "What are you doing here?" He shrunk back onto James back. "I'm going to go to the hospital wing," I huffed and marched past them all.
oOo
"What did you do again?" Madam Pomfrey asked.
"Fell."
"Fell off, out, or down what?"
"A tree," I answered truthfully and she just shook her head.
"What about the others?"
"Others?"
"Your friends and brother."
"I have no idea what you are talking about," I smiled up at her as she fixed my arm.
"You don't look like you've been sleeping," she frowned and instantly my smile dropped.
"I've been having some trouble," I murmured.
Nodding she walked over to the potions cabinet and took out a dreamless sleep potion. "Drink," she ordered and I took the tiny glass and swallowed the gooey liquid causing it to leave a sticky film in my mouth. Within a couple minutes it was fixed, "just stay here I'm sure you'll see them here."
"Thank you," I smiled and she gave a slight smile before retreating into her office as I laid down on the cot.
oOo
My eyes fluttered open and I smiled seeing Remus kneeling by my bed, "Hey there," he smiled.
"Hi," I smiled still laying on my side. "When did you get in, it looks like you haven't slept yet."
"No not yet, I just got here a few minutes ago. All the guys headed back to the dorm about 30 minutes ago."
"Alright," I continued laying there but scooted over patting the spot next to me.
"Addie I'm all dirty," He frowned.
"And I'm not? If you don't want to…" I trailed off pouting and he quickly climbed in. Scooting up to him I felt his arms wrap around my back and my arms folded up against our chest. Closing my eyes I heard him whisper, "I Love you Addie."
"Love you too Remus." I whispered just before falling asleep against his chest for the first time getting in a wonderful peaceful sleep without the aid of potion.
