"You're forcing me to betray my oath of secrecy to parents everywhere, and you've got no one but yourself to blame for what you're about to hear" Angela said, wagging her finger at Brennan in rebuke.

"Sweetie," she began somberly, "once that baby gets here, it's every man for himself-I'm being one hundred percent serious. Give it 'til about the second week and you'll be poking Booth with your sharpest forensic tool to try to get him to change a diaper for you in the middle of the night. By that point, he's going to be so damn tired that he won't be able to keep both eyes open, let alone keep them on you in any way, shape or form. The stalking you're so concerned about now will lose a lot of its punch. And I mean a lot. It may not go away entirely, but it'll probably be no worse than it was before you got pregnant."

Brennan looked dubious.

"You don't know what Booth is like," she said.

"Sure I do, especially when it comes to you; but I don't care if Booth's the spitting image of Florence Nightingale, he's still a guy and by then he'll be a guy without sleep. So just wait and see, and then tell me I wasn't right in a couple of months. There isn't a single woman on the planet who won't agree with me on this. No more "watch your step, honey;" no more "let me run to the grocery store to get you whatever you happen to be craving at this very minute." You'll both be trading exhausted looks and "can you do its" quicker that you can spit out "I did it the last time."

Brennan mulled over this new information, the scientist in her deliberating on whether it was trustworthy or not. It was hard to argue with experience, though, and as mildly disturbing as this altered version of the future was, she couldn't deny that it was also making her feel slightly better about the present.

"Oh, and while you're digesting that unsavory piece of eye-opening news" Angela continued spiritedly, "go ahead and cut my man Booth some slack; I think he's just as thrown off by this whole pregnancy first/dating later stuff as you are. Count on me when I tell you all this excessive bird-dogging will pass; Hodgins and I practically play hide and seek with each other now whenever Michael is colicky or has to go to the emergency room in the middle of the night with an ear infection. Whoever goes soft first and caves in to the crying gets the prize. That's just how it goes these days: the weakest link ends up with the cranky baby. Just hang on a little longer, and in the meantime, put up with what you can and do go ahead and tell him off when it becomes too much-he'll get it eventually. And let him have it full-tilt when you're pushing out that baby of his; it's what childbirth is really for. But running away to the office instead of discussing the issue in an adult manner is never going to work-I've tried it, and it sucks. It just makes for some very cold, lonely nights when you should be comforting each other the most."

"I was very hard on Cam as well" Brennan said guiltily.

"She's a good person, Brennan, and she's looking out for you too-I've seen the worry on her face lately when you go with her on assignments. Let's be real; if something happens out there, neither she nor Booth are going to ever be able to forgive themselves. Maybe you should give in to their demands temporarily, until all your reflexes are back online."

"I'm just tired; tired of fighting, of making concessions; tired of weighing the pros and cons of every choice I make" Brennan stated simply. And it was true, all those things she was telling Angela; physically and mentally, she was bushed. "It's getting to the point where I'm no longer certain whether I'm right about any of the decisions I'm making, even when logically I know I'm right. I'm losing perspective Angela, and it terrifies me," she announced despairingly. "Do you realize that for the first time since I've known him I let myself acknowledge how much it scares me to think of Booth going out to a potentially active crime scene without me? That I'm actually worried about him? I've come very close to losing him before; I even thought he was dead once, and I managed to retain my focus. But if something should happen to him now, I'm no longer convinced that I would be capable of functioning. What is wrong with me?" she asked dolefully. "Everything has changed since we got together."

"Because your lives have become so much more intertwined. And there is nothing wrong with you. It was bound to happen; it happened to me, even when I was fighting it with all I had" Angela confided. Brennan looked away into the distance, past her door; past the walls of the Jeffersonian, into some private place or time that Angela couldn't reach.

"Did you know that he gave me a ring less than two months after I told him I was pregnant?" she said out of the blue, her voice a whisper.

"An engagement ring" Angela replied, and Brennan was caught off-guard by the fact that Angela was not asking a question-she was making a statement.

"It was never categorized as such, but yes, I believe that's what it was intended to be." Brennan studied Angela's face. "You don't seem very surprised by the news."

"What can I say," she replied with a mysterious smile; "Avalon's convinced I have latent psychic skills. She swears if I just keep practicing with those tarot cards, I'll end up giving her a run for her money. It would certainly come in handy when the office pool rolls around."

"He didn't propose; said he wouldn't, that he wouldn't do that to our relationship. He told me that if I ever decided I wanted to get married, I should put it on my ring finger and he would know, but that there was no pressure simply because he was giving it to me; I could just wear it on my other hand if I wanted to. He said it was meant to be a symbol of his commitment to me and nothing more."

"Awww, that's the most romantic non-proposal I've ever heard; right up there with Hodgins' light-up sushi platter. Well, you obviously aren't wearing it yet, but what did you think of it, if I might be so bold as to ask?" There seemed to be more than casual interest written into the question.

"He walked away after he gave it to me, and I never opened the box. It's sitting inside the drawer of my nightstand."

"Are you kidding me? You have the self-restraint of a Tibetan monk" Angela retorted, flabbergasted. "A woman who gets a little black box from a jeweler and doesn't even take a peek? Isn't the curiosity killing you? Honey, you are definitely special" Angela asserted, taking Brennan's wrist and pretending to feel for a pulse. "Are we really sure you're not one of the walking undead?"

"I didn't want to be influenced by it, Angela" Brennan repined, hoping her friend of all people would understand her reasons. "And contrary to what Booth thinks, there is pressure inherent in him giving me that ring. I don't want sentiment to play a part when and if I ever reach the decision to get married, and I'm afraid that my emotions might cloud my judgment if I saw it."

"Feelings coming into play when deciding whether or not to tie the knot? Oh, just imagine, the horror!" Angela shot back jokingly. "So what's the deal? I know you probably think it's an antiquated ritual, maybe even a slightly patriarchal tradition as you view it-is that why you won't do it?"

"It's been a long time since I overcame my original aversion to the institution of marriage; I can see that it does have valid cultural significance for many people, including Booth, as well as some practical benefits. And I actually have considered marrying Booth. It would make things easier legally, particularly with the baby."

"Convenience and practicality; you absolutely have to bring that up when you write your wedding vows. Just think of how the guests at your ceremony will be going for their hankies when you look into Booth's loving, expectant eyes and recite those words to him: 'for better or worse, in sickness and in health, for as long as practicality and convenience shall both live." Angela laughed heartily, until she noticed that the good-natured ribbing was flustering her friend more than she had intended. As much fun as she was having, she made a real effort to reign in her teasing.

"So, if you're not all that opposed to the concept anymore, why not do it? What gives?"

"This, this whole situation; if he thinks he has rights over me now, imagine what will happen once we're married."

"I'm sorry to disagree with you, but no, I don't think that's actually it. I think that's just the excuse you're using. And if Booth was behaving any differently now, you'd just find another excuse to take its place."

"I don't understand."

"I watch you guys all the time because honestly, it still blows my mind to see you together like that, and it also happens to make me incredibly happy, like the universe is working exactly as it should. Brennan," Angela said in a far more subdued and confidential tone than before. "I remember how it was with you when we first met; all work, all science, all logic, and all carefully locked-up hurt and anger. Anyone who came too close to you, to your heart, your first reaction was to push them away. You did it with Sully, and then you tried with your brother and your dad-if it wasn't for Booth, bless him, you might never have reconnected with your family at all. But this is different honey, because this time you know that this is it-it's the last train to Clarksville. However long it took, you've fallen head over heels for Booth and you're starting to realize that if something comes between you, whatever it is, whether it's another person, or death even, life will never ever go back to being what it was before you became a family. And it scares you stiff-please just admit it, if not to me, then at least to yourself."

Brennan closed her eyes, and Angela saw tears brimming in her eyes.

"I don't want to feel this way. There are way too many variables, none which are within my power to control."

"One of them is. You can allow yourself to love him to the fullest, to live life without letting the possibility of loss take that amazing experience away from you. Please don't allow ghosts and shadows to rob you of one of life's greatest gifts."

"I don't know if I can do that. I'm not sure I'm strong enough-I thought I was, but not anymore."

Angela titled her head and sighed. "I know all you've gone through in your life; how hard you've fought for what you have now with Booth, with your family and your friends. If there's anything in this world I'm sure about, it's that you are definitely strong enough."

"What, to overcome my fear of marriage?"

"No, to overcome your fear of giving yourself completely to someone, whether that entails marriage or not. I'm going to share something with you that not even Hodgins knows about me. This life I have now is not the one I expected to be living; that part's not much of a surprise. The surprise is that the prospect of settling down in any sort of permanent way always scared the bejeesus out of me when I was younger, and I swore I would never do that to myself, no matter how tempted I was. I certainly didn't grow up in a conventional family setting, and I looked down on anything that remotely looked like one; it seemed too confining, too predictable-too much by way of personal sacrifice and loss of individuality involved. Yet here I am, driving a generic minivan with a car seat in it, working at the same unglamorous place every single day, sleeping with the same even-keeled man every night. And you know what, it ain't half bad, actually. And if for some horrendous reason all this miraculous stuff I have now got taken away from me, it would still have been worth having, even knowing that I would end up losing it all at some point."

"The difference between you and me, Angela, is that it was all taken away from me once before, and I'm already fully aware of how insurmountably painful it was. I don't think I can risk that much ever again, not even with Booth-not in that way."

"So once bitten, twice shy, is what you're saying?"

"You could put it that way."

"It's already happened, Brennan, can't you see? You're already there with him, and you can't go back to how things were in the past no matter how hard you try, to how uninvested you felt in relationships before you fell in love with Booth. Keeping some sort of imaginary wall up between you two, holding back that little piece of yourself, whether it be through a rejection of marriage or by keeping that little secret plan in the back of your mind I happen to know you must have for distancing yourself from him if you need to, as if at any time you could hop off the ride and save yourself from pain, is just an illusion. You're only fooling yourself if you think you could still walk away at any time without paying a very steep price. You might as well let go and jump in with both eyes open, aware that yes, there's hurt associated with loving someone so completely, but there's also limitless joy. It's the most powerful feeling in the world, to love that way."

Angela put her hand on her friend's arm, and smiled warmly. "Whatever you do, don't let the past take all those wonderful possibilities lying ahead in your future away from you." She slid off the desk, and walked away, but not before giving Brennan one last bit of heart-felt advice. "If I were you, I'd go home tonight and open up that box tucked away in your nightstand and pull out that ring, just to let yourself have a look. A good, long look."

"Why, so I can be tempted by its sparkle to finally put it on?" Brennan asked archly, carelessly brushing off the suggestion.

"No; so that you can be reminded of exactly why it is you love him so much to begin with."