A/N: Hey guys! I'm SO sorry for how long it's taken me to update this. I don't really have an excuse this time, I was just being lazy! Big thanks go to Liloxbubbly, xSamiliciousx, ThatGirl54, nikki1335, Sonib89, BigRedMachineUK, xHalosandwings, moxxie23, wearefallingup, MishaMuse, Jodie54, Kirstein Renee Orton and SoCalStarOC for reviewing the last chapter, I love you all!

I actually really enjoyed writing this one, so I hope you like it too. Please don't forget to leave feedback when you've done.


Chapter 12 - Forgiveness

I didn't quite remember Wade guiding me back over to his car and helping me into the passenger seat. I couldn't even recall the ride back to the hotel. I guess my mind must have finally decided it had had enough of all the pain in my life and had temporarily shut down.

"Hey..." Wade's voice spoke up from the opposite side of the room, and I jumped, my eyes circling around the hotel room that looked identical to my own... but this wasn't mine. There was no way I was going there to be by myself.

"Hey..." I repeated, my voice sounding croaky after the amount of crying I'd been doing. If it was anyone else I was with, I'd have been embarrassed by how I'd acted... but this was Wade we were talking about. He'd seen me at my worst plenty of times before.

"How are you feeling?" He asked, walking towards me slowly, and for the first time I noticed he had an extra blanket in his hands. I didn't reply at first, I watched as he slowly took a seat beside me on his king sized bed and wrapped the blanket around my shoulders. I was already dressed in one of his large hoodies and covered by the quilt, but I still felt cold. I smiled up at him in thanks, before I shrugged my shoulders. I think that was enough of an answer to how I was feeling. "Is there anything else you'd like me to get you?

"No, thank you," I shook my head, "I think you've done enough for me already."

"I haven't done nearly enough..." He whispered, his eyes finding mine with such force that I had to look away. I knew what he was referring to... but I didn't want to have this conversation now, if I could get away with it.

"Can I ask you a question?" I spoke up once the silence had begun to grate on me. I pulled my gaze back to his, watching as he nodded before a small smile appeared on my lips, "How is it that you're always there when I'm in trouble?" I nudged him with my shoulder teasingly.

"That's a good question," He raised his eyebrow my way, laughing lightly as he shook his head, "I don't know. Good timing, I suppose?"

"Whatever you say, Barrett. More like stalking," I grinned his way, the pair of us laughing lightly... until what happened earlier finally brought the pair of us back down to reality.

We sat in silence again, and I guessed that Wade was probably thinking about finding me in the car park, crying my eyes out. Me? I couldn't stop thinking about the reason I had been doing that in the first place.

"You did the right thing, Fia," Wade broke the silence, and I turned to him hesitantly. He rested a hand against my thigh gently as he spoke, and even through the covers I could feel tingles from his touch, "I know it probably doesn't feel like it now, but you did."

"Really?" I asked, shaking my head. I couldn't believe Wade's words, not through the pain in my chest at the thought of never having Randy again. I knew there had been so many terrible things in our relationship, there had always been an elephant in the room with us from the start... and that elephant had been his marriage to Jess, but still. I was pretty sure I wouldn't have been this miserable if I'd just allowed him to still be with her too... right? "Part of me knows that I did do the right thing. It wasn't fair on Jess, on anyone... but I loved him, Wade. I still do, and I think I always will. I don't know why, maybe it's because he was the first guy I ever loved since... since..." I trailed off, my eyes flickering towards him again as I knew I couldn't finish off that sentence. Not after I noticed the look of pure hurt that flashed across Wade's features, even if he did compose himself only seconds afterwards.

"I'm sorry, Soph... for judging you so badly when it came to Randy," He pushed himself back against the headboard and lifted his long legs up on the bed, but I didn't move. I was too frightened to brush against him... to be far too comfortable lay in the same bed as him, "It was none of my business. It had nothing to do with me if you wanted to date him, but I had to stick my nose in and..."

"No," I shook my head quickly, stopping him before he could harm himself with words any longer, "Don't be like that. It's not your fault that you just wanted what was best for me. I mean... we all make mistakes, right?"

"Yes, but I'm the only one here that makes extremely stupid ones."

I took in a deep breath, not liking that I hadn't gotten away with not having this conversation... but now that things seemed to be okay with us, there really wasn't a better time. Well, there would have been, one when I didn't have to worry about Randy... but what were the chances that I was going to be getting that anytime soon?

"Wade..." I sighed, finally pushing myself back beside him. I turned my body so that I could face him, tucking my knees up and wrapping my arms up around them. His eyes found mine, and I knew I was going to surprise the pair of us with what I was about to say, "What happened in the past, what you did... I hate it. But that doesn't mean that I hate you, or that I blame you for doing what you did."

"Wait... I, I don't understand," He shook his head my way, his eyes wide. I smiled lightly, knowing he was going to act that way, and I wasn't surprised. Who would have thought after all the trouble I'd caused, from not wanting to speak to him to practically screaming in his face, that I'd be telling him this?

"You were young, and you had your whole life in front of you. I can't say I'll ever be able to forgive how you went about it... but I don't blame you for not wanting a baby," I shrugged his way, slowly reaching out and taking one of his hands in mine. He looked between our joined hands and my face with wide eyes, and I laughed lightly. "I would never have asked you to ruin your dream before it even started."

We stayed silent for a few more moments as Wade processed my words, his thumb absentmindedly tracing lines across my hand and sending shivers down my spine. I felt terrible, still feeling that way when he touched me after only just breaking up with Randy... but something about Wade had always managed to do that to me. Even when I had thought I'd hated him.

"Does this mean that you forgive me?" He finally spoke up, his voice barely above a whisper, but I could clearly make out the hopeful undertone.

"I think so," I shrugged my shoulders, because I still wasn't one hundred percent I could ever forgive him entirely for what happened... but this was a start, "It would be nice, to be able to go back to how things used to be when we first met. We could be good friends again... if you're willing to try."

"Do you really think I'd say no to that?" He asked, a grin growing across his lips, and I couldn't help but giggle his way. Everything might not have been perfect in my life right now, but it did feel like a huge weight had been lifted now that Wade and I seemed to have finally worked everything out. I had to admit, I couldn't wait to have a friendship with him again like we used to have before everything went pear shaped. "You look exhausted... come here."

Wade held his arm out towards me, and I hesitated, wondering if this was the best thing to do... but why shouldn't I cuddle with him? Neither of us were in a relationship now, and it wasn't like we hadn't done worse. I smiled up at him lightly again before I crawled closer to him, resting my head against his chest as the pair of us got comfortable. From the way Wade pulled me down and wrapped his arms around me tightly, I guessed it meant I was going to be staying the night... and I breathed a sigh of relief at not having to go back to my own empty room.

The pair of us stayed silent for a long time, finally allowing me the time to relax into Wade's embrace. I knew I had a lot to deal with the following day, but for now I could fall asleep in the familiar arms of the man who I now had back in my life... at least, I kind of did. I snuggled into his large frame, my eyes slowly beginning to close when I thought our conversation was finally over with...

"Fia?" He asked, his voice low. My eyes shot open, but I didn't move. I was far too comfortable.

"Hmm?" I mumbled, realising that for the first time ever I didn't mind him using his old nickname for me. In fact, my lips pulled up in the smallest of smiles.

"Do you ever think about what it would have been like if I hadn't have left you? If I'd been there for you, and we'd had the baby?"

I froze, the only sound in the room coming from the beating of Wade's heart as I lay with my head against his chest. I should have known this conversation would come up sooner or later... I just never really thought about how I'd answer it.

Because the truth was, I thought about it every single day.


"Boys, hurry up. Dinner is ready!" I shouted from the kitchen, rolling my eyes as I watched both Wade and our child running around the outdoor swimming pool. My eyes followed them as they circled it a few extra times, before Wade stopped, his hands on his knees as the little boy kept going, not stopping until he skidded to a halt beside me inside.

"Mummy, can we have dinner outside, please? It's too nice to be in!" He pouted, his bright green eyes sent me a puppy dog look, and I knew I'd never be able to resist. I smiled down at him, shuffling his messy black hair before I told him to go and wait outside. He got a little more like Wade every day, if that was possible... and it made my heart swell that little bit more each time I realised how much he was like his father.

With a sigh I picked up two plates and made my way outside. It really was a beautiful day, so I didn't see why we couldn't all sit as a family on the patio and eat. I yelped as I stepped outside, nearly bumping into Wade as he came to take the plates from me.

"Sorry, beautiful," He chuckled, leaning down to place a lingering kiss on my lips. Even now, over nine years after the two of us had met; we still had the same spark as we always had... although it wasn't without work. Things had been hard when I'd first become pregnant, but we'd pulled through, and now our relationship was stronger than ever and we had a perfect son to prove it.

"Hmm, that's okay," I smiled up at him, waiting till he turned around till I slapped him on the butt lightly. He span back around, eying me with fake shock as I laughed his way.

"Alex, you can shut up, too," He turned to look at our seven year old son who had started giggling, making the pair of us laugh even more as I made my way back inside to pick up the last of the food.

I looked around the average sized kitchen, a sigh of contentment leaving my lips at how perfect my life was. Perhaps Wade and I hadn't gotten what we'd wanted when we were younger... but what we had now was so much better. I worked part time from home, designing websites which I'd picked up a talent for after returning to college when Alex was a few years old. Wade worked as a marine biologist, which certainly brought in the cash... but we still only had a modest home. We didn't need anything else when we had such a perfect family.

I made my way back outside, placing the last plate down on the table before I made sure Alex was comfortable, placing a kiss on the side of his head as he dug into his food. I rolled my eyes; he really was like his father, especially when it came to his appetite. I heard Wade laugh lightly, and I turned to see him looking our way, practically reading my mind when it came to our son.

I smiled his way, walking over to him again and taking the seat beside him. He moved a little closer to me, turning me to face him before he kissed me lightly, his hand squeezing my knee gently as he pulled away.

"I love you, Fia."

"I love you too, Wade," I whispered, kissing him lightly once more before the pair of us turned around to eat dinner with our son.


"Fia?" Wade spoke up, interrupting the daydream that I had far too often. I swallowed the lump in my throat as I thought about telling Wade the truth... but maybe that wasn't something he was ready to know yet.

"No, not really," I shook my head, thankful that my voice wasn't betraying me, "I guess because I didn't like to think of it after it happened, I ended up keeping it that way."

"Yeah... I understand," He added, his voice quiet as I felt his arms tighten around me a little more, before the pair of us finally did fall silent.

At least, my voice fell silent. My mind on the other hand couldn't erase how happy Wade, myself and our little boy had been in my thoughts. If only that had been true. But life never turns out how you want it to.