Sorry about the long delay. The stupid website wouldn't let me upload it. But anyways...Such suspense! Who is Jeoffry Smart? Is he who he says he is? We'll find out in the next chapter!


In which Jackie and Lady Stuart have a shouting match

The door opened. Jeoffry, who was leaning against the door at the time, fell over sideways with a startled yelp.

"Having fun yet?" a woman's cold voice drawled. The most malicious-looking human being Rose and Jack had ever seen stood in the doorway.

Her skin was ivory white, smooth and flawless. Two cold grey eyes glared out at them from above a thin beaklike nose. Her bright red lips were drawn in a tight scowl, and her steel grey hair was tied up into a crisp bun.

Jeoffry gazed fearfully up at her from the floor. "L-l-lady Stuart?" he squeaked. For a second, it was as if a mask had slipped from his face. No longer were his cheeks full and youthful, but haggard and weary of life.

But it was only for a second. Jeoffry composed himself quickly. But Lady Stuart saw it. And so did the Doctor.


"Well, that was a wonderful use of a Sunday afternoon!" Jackie complained.

Elton nodded. "Honestly, that man needs to get a life."

"And a new broom," Ursula added.

The three of them laughed.

"Oh, yeah. If he didn't break that broom when he threw it at us, I would be very, very surprised," Elton chuckled.

They had just returned from their "visit" to Mr. Tom Short. Apparently, Mr. Short hadn't been home, but his crotchety old father had been.

Jackie glanced at her watch. "What's taking Rose so long?" she murmured anxiously.

Elton and Ursula glanced at each other, suddenly serious. "Why don't you call her?" Ursula suggested.

Jackie nodded and took out her phone and dialed Rose's number.


"What's that sound?" Lady Stuart glanced up, startled.

"Sorry, that's my cell phone. I'll just—" Before she even finished her sentence, the cell phone disappeared from her hand and reappeared in Lady Stuart's hand.

The tall woman held the phone to her ear. "Hello? Who is this?"

"WHO THE !expletive! ARE YOU AND WHAT THE !expletive! HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY DAUGHTER?!"

Lady Stuart held the cell phone several inches from her ear and shrieked back, "HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT, YOU INSOLENT !expletive!!"

"I'LL TALK TO YOU HOWEVER THE !expletive! I LIKE! I DEMAND TO TALK TO MY DAUGHTER, IF YOU HAVEN'T KILLED HER YET!" Jackie howled back.

"SHE'S STILL ALIVE, BUT SHE WON'T BE FOR MUCH LONGER IF YOU KEEP ON SCREAMING AT ME!" Lady Stuart screamed.

Jeoffry snatched the phone from Lady Stuart. He didn't like it when people yelled that loud (it hurt his ears; his ears were as sensitive as a dog's) and he most certainly didn't like when people used such terrible language, especially when it was the Mistress doing the yelling and swearing. So he decided to stop it.

"Do pardon milady, madame. She does have a veritable temper, and she does tend to go too far. Is your daughter, by any chance, Miss Dame Rose Tyler of the Powell Estate?"

He heard the woman on the other end of the line shout something to somebodies named Ursula and Elton. Then she said to him, "Yes, her name is Rose. How is she? Is she all right? Can I talk to her? Who are you? What have you done to her?"

Jeoffry cleared his throat. He had never spoken to somebody's mother, well, apart from the Mistress, but she didn't really count since she was his Mistress, and his own mother, but she didn't count either because she was his mother after all. "Um, well, she's fine. Yes, she is all right. Yes, you can talk to her. I'm Th--Jeoffry Smart. I've done nothing to her."

"Good. Now give the phone to her so I can talk to her."

Jeoffry gave the phone to Rose. "It's your mother," he told her unnecessarily.

Rose snatched her phone from his hand. "Mum? It's me, Rose!"

"Oh, Rose! Where are you?"

"Locked in some sort of storage cabinet at the Stuart Estate with Jack, the Doctor, Mr. Smart, and a pageboy."

"Who was that lady?"

"Lady Stuart."

"Come home soon, will you?"

"I'll try."