"Danny are you crazy?" Sam finally responded flatly. "I'm coming in Danny clearly you hit your head."
"No Sam...you don't want to." He protested softly, he sounded scared maybe even close to crying. She wasn't afraid because he couldn't be dead because then he wouldn't be talking to her. It was only logical.
Sam managed to slip the card beneath the lock and get the door open. What she saw was not what she expected, there was a boy in the room huddle against the wall his knees tucked up against his chest. Unearthly green eyes found her beneath the silver-white hair with an unsettling stare. She bit her lip looking at the strangely familiar boy and wondered just what she was dealing with.
"Jeez Danny what'd you do to your hair?" She remarked with a smirk slowly making her way over to him.
He scowled at her in response. "I really wish I knew." He muttered in desperation while burying his head in his arms.
She sat beside him and put a hand on his arm but immedieatly pulled back in shock. "My god you're...you're as cold as-"
"Death." Danny whispered and shuddered while hiding his face again. "I-I don't feel right Sam."
Worry crossed the girl's face and she urged him to his feet. Her tone had changed along with her attitude toward the sitiuation. There was something very unpleasant in the air. "Come on Danny, maybe you should lie down."
He complied with her but only because he wasn't fully focused on what she was saying. All he could think of was what had happened to him and he didn't even know what that was. Inwardly he was panicking and felt the fear escalating with every passing second. When he looked up from the floor he realized he was sitting in his room on his bed where worried violet eyes were looking at him. How long had she been waiting like that?
He locked eyes with her and he would've taken a calming breath but he realized he was at a loss for that now. She patted his knee softly and spoke. "Danny, can you tell me what happened? What's wrong?"
He wanted to keep her away so she wouldn't have to know. He wanted to hide and never have to deal with this new hand he'd been dealt by the cruel fates. Danny didn't know how to explain this to her and wasn't sure where to start. She couldn't possibly understand just what he was dealing with now. If only he could find the right sentiments for a moment like this but he wasn't sure what this might engender.
She stared intently at him trying to keep her eyes off his new apparel. There was something so painfully reminiscent in that outfit but she couldn't remember ever really seeing it anywhere before. And yet the skin tight black fiber and white gloves and boots weren't so foreign to her memory. The Fenton's used to wear hazmat suits not unlike what Danny may have been wearing at this instant.
She couldn't even fathom where it had come from and why it seemed to be giving off a glow. It couldn't have been Danny that was emiting the light. That wasn't humanly possible.
"I can't breathe." He finally announced splitting the silence while letting his shoulders slouch in defeat. It was the only truth he seemed to grasp currently and it was all he could give to her. He knew she expected more but it was all he knew.
"It's alright Danny I can handle this, just lie down and-" She began while bending over to retrieve the medical kit on the floor but he stopped her while shaking his head.
"I think it's too late." He murmured weakly.
She shivered in his grasp and he let go with a guilty look. "What are you talking about?" She inquired in a quieted voice as if speaking too loud would make him vanish. She began to wonder if the fever was making him dillusional. She was willing to over look his strange appearance for the time being, at least until she sorted out his physical problem.
He looked down at his hands and was still confused to see the strange gloves dawning them. He had only lost sight for a moment but when his vision returned he'd looked like this. There had been a bright flash of light and he remembered closing his eyes only for a minute. None of it made any sense and he wasn't sure how to articulate it to her. Somehow telling her that he'd ceased life-functions was confusing and unrealistic.
What was even more confusing was the fact that if what he thought was true then he was defying logic. Danny felt crazier then he'd even felt before in his inability to rationalize. But for once, which was stricking, he wasn't in pain. The revelation gave him some relief, for once in years he wasn't in any pain. He layed back and closed his eyes for a moment feeling disconnected and lost.
"Danny please tell me what's going on." Sam pleaded, she was getting scared, he could sense it.
In fact he seemed to suddenly sense an energy that she as giving off, it was warm but uncomfortable. She was nervous and scared and he didn't need to look at her to know it. He searched for her hand and felt her shake and her skin tingle as though the contact was unpleasant. He squeezed her hand but didn't feel like he was solid like her. She must've felt the same because she placed her other hand on his forehead. Her touch was strange and almost forgein to him.
"Danny-"
"The air is so much thicker when you don't need it." He mused aloud before quieting himself.
While he lied there she watched him, his eyes were closed and his facial features didn't change. She looked at his chest out of habit and expected a slight rise and fall. After a while it was apparent there was no movement at all. Sam bit her lip and carefully rested two fingers on his neck searching for a rythm. His unearthly green eyes flicked open and stared into hers with a strange disconnected amusement.
She shook her head. "This isn't possible."
She swallowed hard trying to rationalize just what she was experiancing. He watched as she pressed her palm over his chest and waited. But still there was nothing, no rise and fall, no beating, just that cold unnatural feeling. "Maybe we should get you to a hospital."
Danny snapped upwards and began to shake his head. "Sam, look at me. Do you really think there's anything left for anyone to do?" He gestured at himself and saw the fear well up in her eyes. Her reserves were breaking down.
"You don't know that. This could be one of those side-effects to being exposed to that radiation your parents had told us about." She retorted trying desperately to come up with an answer to this impossible puzzle.
"Sam don't you think it's a little too late for help? Did you feel a pulse, 'cause I don't. I haven't even been breathing this whole time. I don't even look like myself." He pointed out in a harsh tone. Considerably he was flustered with this new state of existance. "I think I may be-"
"No, don't say that." She interjected forcefully.
"And why not?" He queried darkly.
She clenched her teeth and narrowed her eyes. "Because Danny, if that was...true then we wouldn't be talking about it right now." She lowered her fierce tone. "I can't think of you that way, not right now."
"What do you want me to do about it?" Danny asked the frustration and hopelessness rising in his voice. "I'd change things if I could."
Sam began shaking her head in complete denial. "I don't believe this, I can't. If I believe this then you're-"
"Dead." He affirmed solemnly.
"For real." She added and once again they locked eyes.
The two teenagers were at a loss. They didn't have answers they didn't even have an explanation. They were both trying desparetly to explore the situation without losing control. Danny was distraught because he couldn't seem to voice just what he was thinking. He also was debating on whether or not he should stay around any longer. Sam wasn't reacting well and she was always one to be comfortable with the abnormal.
There weren't many words to explain just how he was feeling at moment, though he doubted he was feeling anything real at all. He was wondering if he hadn't fallen unconcious on that bathroom floor and this was all some fever induced nightmare. Maybe the way he felt Sam was only his dream responses to her actually touching him somewhere in that waking world. A twinge of optimism pulled on him, if he could believe this were all a dream maybe he wouldn't have to be so afraid.
"I should wake up now." Sam whispered softly watching him play with the edges of her fingertips. He couldn't really feel them, the sensation was interesting, and he was trying to decipher why.
He broke out of his concentration and looked at her. "What?" She seemed to be thinking the same as him.
"Well the only logical solution is that I'm dreaming. But I can't be sleeping I'm supposed to be taking care of you." She reasoned almost monotonously. "So how does one wake themselves?"
He shrugged at a loss for a method. He wished one of them was dreaming but as he lied down again to regroup he was doubting that theory. He rested his hand on his chest and let his mind drift. It used to be that when he lied like this he gathered comfort from knowing at least he was still alive. He could always feel it, the familiar unfailing beating, it used to relax him. Because he always knew that as long as it was there he still had a fighting chance.
But now, now as he lied there, he felt nothing. He might as well have been touching stone or just about anything inanimate and cold. He would steal glances at Sam begging for some prespective, but she seemed just as lost. The overwhelmingly despondent feeling hung over them in the darkened room. Confusion passed between their glances as they both tried to figure just who had imagined this nightmarish reality. Between the two of them they begged for the other to wake up but to no prevail.
Danny lowered his head. "What if it's not a dream." He whispered too afraid to talk calmly of the matter anymore.
Sam started to shudder then almost reflexively she hid her face. He already knew what that meant and he watched for a moment with detatched curiosity the way her body shook when she cried. He almost wanted to sit there and just stare but that forgein human empathy started scratching at his mind.
He was meticulous with his movements and with a silence and smoothness that only a phantom could acheive he gathered the distraught girl in his arms. To him it was like holding a radiator, she emitted heat at a startling level, human contact didn't feel right. He used to treasure the comfort of another but now he could hardly stand to touch her.
"Don't worry so much Sam, it's probably not as bad as we think." He muttered trying his hardest to encourage her. Or at least get her to stop crying it was making him feel sick.
She was so warm, so alive, and he felt so contrary to her. Everything was wrong, all wrong. He tried to busy himself with stroking her hair maybe to comfort her or maybe to comfort himself. But the longer he held her the more a creeping resentment took a hold of him. Why should she be so lucky to breathe? Why was she perfectly alright while he was so obviously messed up?
The more he let it fester the worse the resentment became. He felt a sense of great power and strength far more that she could try to comprehend. To him she was just a rag doll in his grip and was at his mercy. The thoughts were consuming and his thirst to unlock and utilize this energy, this power, was increasing.
He only remained numb to his humanity for a few moments of contemplation until it struck him. He was thinking of hurting her and didn't know why. Terrorfied he released her and backed away in the process. The fear was biting because he no longer understood what he was anymore. Perhaps he was a monster, it only made sense now.
"Danny what's the matter?" Sam asked with a troubled expression.
He waved the intruding thoughts away. "I need to be alone." He urged as he stood up.
She stood up and came to be beside him but he shoved her back gently. "Danny," She coaxed. "I can't leave you alone. Not like this."
He began to shake his head and he paced. He had so much energy burning inside him and he didn't want her to make him angrier. That envy it had been so consuming of him. All because she was simply breathing, he couldn't risk it, it was such an easy descent. He wasn't sure what he'd do but he didn't feel like anything good was forthcoming.
"Please Sam, I just need a little time. I'll be okay, I just need some space to think. Please just let me have that." He hadn't wanted to beg but at this point he'd do anything for a little isolation. It was only for the best and he had to make his choices based on what was best.
Sam's features were serious and worried. Perhaps she couldn't understand the levity of what he was experiancing. What she did understand was the desperation in his voice. She couldn't deny him privacy it wouldn't be right. He still deserved dignity even if he was drastically changed. She was sure he was still Danny in some respect.
She didn't say anything to him she simply complied quietly and walked out the door. As soon as she did he slammed it shut and heaved his weight, or lack thereof, against the door. It was irrational for him to assume she'd change her mind and barge in but he didn't want her around. Or anyone for that matter. There was something about him now that made him feel like a dangerous abomination.
He paced again in his dark room wondering blankly just what he should do now. He was experiancing so much at once it was becoming overwhelming. He'd become so angry over seemingly nothing then immedietely felt remorse then sorrow and self-loathing. Then he'd go through the cycles again and at the same time feel something else entirely just below the surface.
Danny extended his hands in front of him curiously studying the gloves. He could hardly believe his own eyes the more he looked. He couldn't help but wonder what sick reality had designed this fate for him. Once again the anger began to build up inside him but this time he wasn't afraid to show it.
To his surprise that urge he'd been surpressing came forth and fizzled outward in bright green energy sparks. A new fear gripped him as the energy was a confirmation that he was dangerous. He carefully inspected the now broken and burnt radio in the corner of his room. He bent over to grab the pieces and felt that they were still warm from the blast.
"I...I did this?" He muttered turning the singed metal over in his hands. The same hands had, by some force, destroyed the piece of technology swiftly and silently.
Carefully he opened his palm and focused on the green that he'd seen before. Usually it came unintentionally in emotionally distressing times but this time he was willing it. At first it was difficult as his concentration was breaking with frustration, that green energy was real, he just had to control it. The longer it took the more he became concerned, what if he wasn't in control?
He could hurt everyone he loved if he never learned to garner such power. The thought made his head spin violently because that creeping resentment was back and it was a difficult thing to fight. The light came forth and Danny found hovering in his hand, by his own design, was a small orb of glowing green.
Of course his reaction to this was that of any sane person, panic.
What did he do with it now? Throw it? It might damage something larger and make Sam come back in here. She couldn't see what he was doing, it'd shock and possibly horrorify her. He wanted it to go away and just as those thoughts came to him it fizzled out, just like that. He relaxed slightly with the solace of knowing he had control over this power. Not the best control but still something was better than nothing at all.
Danny got up and moved toward the window he wasn't sure what to do anymore. Now everything was no longer a question of his mortality but a question of his humanity. He had tried to act calm with Sam in dealing with the whole possibility of him being dead but the more he thought of himself that way the more he feared death more than anything.
He'd never feared death before. All those times he spent in hospital beds teetering on the edge, the strange sometimes intimadating machines he'd been hooked to, the times he woke up in Jazz's shuddering arms had never scared him. Death was a very real possibility but it was never tangible, at least not to his memory.
He held his arms tightly against his body at the thought of his sister. He couldn't face her like this, he couldn't look her in the eye and tell her. She'd be devastated to come home and find her little brother dead but still in plain sight. Danny didn't want her to hurt anymore she'd cried for him far too much then she should've. He couldn't bear to put her through something like this not after all she'd done for him.
Staring out the window he wondered if jumping from it would be considered suicide since he didn't seem to be alive anymore. He'd promised Jazz he wouldn't do that to himself ever again but he seemed to be without many options. Danny wanted nothing more than to just disappear and all his problems would be over. He shut his eyes and thought if he could just vanish he'd never have to worry.
Upon opening them he looked around and noticed he wasn't in his room anymore. In fact he was standing in the lobby, it was raining. "Interesting..." He mused looking around having seemed to have passed through levels of the building in a very painless fashion.
He looked back towards the stairs and thought briefly of returning but instead he gathered his energy and ran. Running away was childish and he knew it but he couldn't face them, he wouldn't. So he disappeared down the street running until it felt like his feet weren't touching the ground, running to somewhere he could make sense of something.
Danny didn't look back but he didn't look forward. Everything was too much, like a sensory overload, he gritted his teath and kept running. He was losing sight, losing faith, and losing his identity. He couldn't possibly be Danny Fenton anymore but he couldn't even begin to know who he was now.
--
"Sam, Danny, I'm home." Jazz announced happily as she entered the only place she felt at home. She put her bags down and looked into the living room to see a girl curled into a ball on the couch. Her violet eyes were staring vacantly at the wall.
"Sam..." She queried cautiously while walking towards her. "Sam, what's the matter? He didn't..."
Sam shook her head. "No, it's not that. I'm just," She put a hand on her forehead and swallowed hard. What should she say to the older girl? "I'm just a little confused, is all."
Jazz's brow wrinkled in confusion. "What's going on? Where's Danny, is he okay?"
Sam bit her lip and lowered her eyes, she had a headache and it was pounding. "He's in his room."
"You look distressed Sam, is he okay?" She repeated her voice growing firmer.
The raven haired girl's response was her nervously grabbing the edges of her short hair while avoiding the other girl's question. Sam wasn't completely sure how to tell Jazz just what had happened. She didn't even know herself what had transpired over the past hour. Jazz grabbed Sam's hand and gave it a tender pat for confidence.
"Sam, I need a straight answer. Is Danny okay?" Jazz urged in a calm voice her eyes were gentle and coaxing.
Sam bit her lip and pointed to his door. "He's in his room." The girl responded firmly while Jazz got up in a hurry and made her way toward the door.
It was never a good sign or a good day when a simple question isn't answered straight. Something was wrong but the girl was neglecting to tell her maybe out of fear or guilt. Jazz hoped whatever was on the other side of his door wasn't as bad as Sam was making it seem. He had been sick after all, maybe Sam was stressed and worried. But why confused?
Jazz took a deep breath and felt Sam hovering behind her like a shadow. When she opened the door she took a quick glance around and saw nothing. She walked into the dark cold room and looked on the otherside of his bed in case he'd fallen and was relieved but scared to find no sign of him.
"Sam where's Danny?" She shouted looking at the girl with fierce eyes.
Sam shrugged looking completely lost and just as shocked. "He..he was literally here only minutes ago. I was right here with him." She looked around and muttered to herself. "At least I think I was."
She backed out of the room and raced to the bathroom fearing there was a body lying in there. Fearing that she'd found him dead and imagined the whole unwordly conversation and vision of Danny to protect herself from the truth. When she looked in the doorway she saw the bright light still on but the room was empty as well. She turned to seek Jazz but found the woman standing directly behind her with a frantic look.
"How could you lose him? We have to find him, he could be in danger." She exclaimed. "He can't be alone Sam, he could die."
"I didn't lose him." Sam retorted defensively. "He couldn't have gotten by me I was on that couch the whole time since I left him in his room. There's no way he went through the front door."
Jazz scoffed. "What are you suggesting he walked through the walls?" She responded folding her arms and glaring at the younger girl.
She had trusted her to be responsible and was not getting the results she'd expected. Inwardly she was cursing herself for leaving him with someone who had never been altogether herself. Danny was, afterall, emotionally unstable and probably not at all over his self-destructive tendencies. Jazz couldn't believe she was so trusting sometimes, that was her first mistake.
Sam clenched her teeth nervously at the thought, her violet eyes darting from his room to the couch she'd been on. None of this was making any sense and she had no explanation. "Of course not, " The girl answered her voice wavering with trepidation. "That...that's not humanly possible."
I've been reluctant to post this chapter as I hate it. But I can find no substantial way to make it better or avoid it as a whole. Hopefully it's not as bad as I think, but it probably is.
