Chapter 12 – Hello, Dr. Cullen
The next few weeks with Edward were great. We were together all the time, except for when he was at work or I was looking for work.
This job hunting thing was about as hard as I'd always feared it would be. After almost 2 months I still had nothing. I had interviews everyday but it seemed I was not qualified for anything and no one was even willing to give me a chance.
I returned to my house only on rare occasions to pick up something. I didn't like to hang out there very much since the electricity had long since been turned off, thanks to the whole unemployment situation which left me with barely enough to pay the rent. I refused to tell Edward how bad things were becoming, how dire my situation was becoming, as it was he never let me pay for dinner, groceries, movies or anything. I was beginning to feel more like a mooch than a girlfriend and was starting to become depressed.
Today was a rare day with no interviews. Edward was off at work and I was alone in his big, lonely house. I took a walk, I read a book, but still my mind kept running. What would I do if I never got a job? When would things get bad enough that I wouldn't have a choice? What would happen if the only thing I could ever do was strip?
I tried to push such thoughts away, instead focusing on my favourite distraction, Edward, or more specifically the way it felt when Edward was near me, touching me, kissing me.
I remembered a particular time a while back when we were in the shower. I remembered how he tried to be good as he stepped in after me. "Now Bella, this is just a shower. I really do need to get to work."
I mentally rolled my eyes at him knowing that anytime we were in the shower together could never be just a shower, but I smiled sweetly, knowing that it would only entice him more.
It was as though my mind was flashing through the moments of that day. My back to him, him moving my hair to the side so he could kiss my neck softly. His hands roaming over my body as he pretended to wash me. Me pressing my ass back against him and him moaning my name. Him, finally, giving in and placing my hands on the wall of the shower before his hands traveled slowly down my arms, to my waist and then to my hips. He gripped them tightly as I raised myself on to my tip toes, waiting for him. Suddenly he was inside me and the world just felt complete. We both gasped at the feeling.
I was brought back to the present, to that lonely house and I need to not sit there any longer. I remembered a conversation Edward and I had months ago when we were going our separate ways before I started, in essence, living in his home.
I smiled to myself and ran up the stairs to my "secret" dresser. I rummaged through it until I found what I was looking for. I put it on and gathered my long white trench coat, my key and my purse. It was time to pay Edward a little visit.
The drive to the hospital seemed longer than usual and I nearly bounced in excitement all the way there. I couldn't wait to see the look on his face!
When I got to the hospital I was met by a surly looking, heavy set nurse who didn't seem too pleased with my sickness excuse and wanting to see Doctor Cullen, the young, talented surgeon who I knew was doing an ER rotation this week. However, she didn't seem to care enough to question me. She took my information and surprisingly showed me to a private room right away, I'd apparently chosen a day that was not so busy.
I walked around the room, glancing at all the equipment. I was nervous and excited to see what Edward would think about my little surprise. I straightened my jacket and stood next to the bed figuring I should be ready for when he would walk in the door. It seemed to take a very long time and I was glad that I had lots of practice standing around in stiletto heels, if I didn't these shoes would be killing my legs.
Finally the door swung open and in walked Edward. He looked gloriously beautiful in his black slacks, white dress shirt and blue and black striped tie. His hair had its normal unruly wave and I just wanted to grab it and run my fingers through it.
"What seems to be the problem, Ms. –"he asked, head still bent so he could study the chart he'd been holding.
"Hello Doctor Cullen, I'm just here for a quick check-up." He starts when he hears my voice. His eyes go right to my face and he looks right at me.
"Bella, what are you doing here? Is everything-"He starts to say but I can see his eyes starting to travel down. He was taking in my white trench coat that goes almost to my knees. He was taking in the white stockings that wrapped around my calves. He's taking in the 4 inch white stiletto pumps that make my stocking covered legs look like they go on forever. I can see he's thinking but he hasn't put it together yet.
"I don't know, Doctor Cullen. It seems like it's a little hot in here, or is it just me? "I ask fanning myself with my hand, looking at him through under my lashes. He's looking at me a little stunned; I don't think he knows what to think. I decide it's time for another clue. My hand snakes its way across my body so slowly and removes the knot in my belt. I let it fall open and then shrug slowly out of it, letting it slip off my arms until it hits the floor with a muffled thud.
I was standing in front of him and I swear his eyes were quite in danger of bugging out of his head. His eyes raked slowly over my body, finally having time to take in the very tight, very cleavage revealing white and red nurses uniform and thigh high white stockings with little weaving and bows embroidered in the tops of them.
He swallowed hard at the sight of me. It was a look I'd seen many men give me before, but this, this was the first time that Edward looked at me like this. This was not the look of love, or adoring or protection that he so often wore. No, this was a look of pure want and passion and need.
"Bella," he said, his voice husky and deep. He shifted uncomfortably and looked towards the door. "You look, I mean. Wow. It's just, well, I'm at work." He splutters out.
"And?" I ask, cocking my head to the side and raising my eyebrows at him.
"And...Well, what if someone walks in?" He says looking for an excuse.
I smirked at him and then start moving to the door, slowly. I came within an inch of touching him as I passed and I could see him close his eyes and inhale. He was inhaling the scent of me, just as I so often did with him. I crossed to the door and put my back to it, never taking my eyes from his I reached my hand out and turned the lock.
"There, that's one problem solved. Any other problems you can think of Doctor Cullen?" I asked with my sexiest smirk, arching my back so only my shoulders stayed in contact with door.
"Well there is one that I can think of." He said making his way over to stand directly in front of me, his eyes deadlocked on mine.
"And what is that, Doctor Cullen?" I asked.
He looked me up and down. "I'm not sure I can be gentle with you, when you look like this. You, you do things to me. Make me feel things I've never felt before. You make me feel, primal, like I need you; I need to be with you, in you, all the time. The thoughts, the thoughts I have, they aren't the thoughts a good boyfriend has for the woman he loves." He's not looking at me now. His eyes are far away, they almost seem guilty.
"Oh, Doctor Cullen, I think these thoughts and feelings of yours are more than normal and I think it's time he explored them fully. Tell me what you want."
He still didn't look at me. "I just, I want to have you without thinking about it, I just want to feel. But I always feel like I need to be careful, with everything you've been through, with everything that's been done to you...I just I don't feel like I can let myself go."
I brought my hand to grasp his tie tightly. "You don't have to worry about me. I know you want to fuck me and that's ok. We don't need to always be "making love"-"I silently rolled my eyes, I hate that expression with every fibre of my being. "I feel the same way, believe me. And I want you to let yourself go, I want you to be yourself. If you want to fuck me, then you should fuck me."
He searches my eyes for a few moments and I know what he sees there. He sees that I'm being honest, that I'm telling him the truth and that is the exact moment I see his expression change. His eyes darken and he licks his lips, throwing caution to the wind, he reached both hands up to my throat where he gently traced the lines at my neck before they both traveled down the center of my chest to where they gently rest against my heart for just a moment. I can see he's made the decision.
"Well, Nurse I think we should start with a thorough examination." He said as his hands move down more quickly, full of purpose, to the top of the dress and continued downwards. They rest just above my navel when he sticks them between the buttons and pulls. The buttons on the nurse outfit I'm wearing scatter and the dress hangs open and he looks hungrily at the red lacy see-through bra.
His hands go to his belt and he quickly relives himself of all unnecessary clothing. He walks forward just the three steps that are separating us and wraps his hands around my body, going low to my ass as they rest there so he can pick me up. He lifts me and shoves me roughly against the door as his lips find my neck and he starts to lick and suck and nip.
Knowing exactly what he wants I reach between us and grab his already hard cock, wish we had more time, but knowing we don't, I push my panties aside and put the head right against me. He needs no further invitation and shoves deeply into me. We both have to stifle moans and he pumps rapidly with long, deep strokes. I grab at his hair and pull hard to make him look at me. Our eyes are locked and I see the passion in his eyes and I know he sees it in mine. "Fuck." He says, trying to keep quiet. I know he's as close as I am. I shove my hips against him and arch my back off the door to give him more leverage.
"Fuck, Edward. Don't stop." I say through gritted teeth as I feel myself tense around him. I let myself go and I feel his grip tighten as he releases into me. We stay like that for a little while both breathing hard.
He put me down and I looked around at the scattered buttons. "Well I'm glad I brought a coat." I said smiling looking into his eyes, which have returned to his normal sweet ones. We both laugh as he mutters an apology. He was still so close and I was still up against the wall, I tried to move, knowing he had to get back to work, but he wouldn't let me.
"Edward?"
He stared at me for a long moment, not saying anything. I tried again to pull away but again he won't let me. "I've been thinking," he starts and then waits, I raised my eyebrows and just stare at him, not really sure what to do. After I while I reach out and touch his face. He closes his eyes and snuggles into my hand. "I love you."
"I love you too, but you really do have to go to work, you'll get in trouble." I know at that point he's spent too much time with me and someone is bound to come looking for him.
"I don't think you know just how much I love you. Bella?" He looked into my eyes finally, raising his head up and out of my hand. "Bella, I love you and I want you to marry me."
I stare at him waiting for the punch line but nothing comes. "What?" was the only thing I could manage to force from my lips, totally and utterly sure I could not have heard him properly.
"Marry me, Bella."
