He over reacted. That's the only thing he can think of now. He didn't know what Izaya was going to do, or if he was even going to fight someone—though it was likely, since most of Izaya's "business" dealt with gangs. But, even so, Shizuo had jumped to conclusions. It happened all so suddenly and Shizuo found that he was regretting it afterward. So he headed to Shinra's to see if he could get the brunet doctor to apologize—anything to help Izaya. Because Shizuo obviously wasn't helping Izaya by throwing scraps of metal at him.

The only reason he had flipped was because his conscious seemed to know Izaya would be up to something - but maybe he wasn't. Maybe, for once, Izaya was innocent. Maybe, for once, Izaya hadn't planned anything and he was being totally sincere with Shizuo.

Now Izaya was on his way, in a man named Shiki's car, and Shizuo had no idea what he was supposed to do. What was he supposed to say? He probably freaked Izaya out with his sudden mood flash back at the restaurant.

Shizuo digs his phone out of his pocket to check the time on his phone. He pauses when he see's the new message box up, blinking. The time of the message shows that it was from sometime that morning, around the time he was meeting Izaya. He had never looked at that text Izaya had sent him… did he? He swallows nervously before he clicks open the message.

From: Orihara Izaya

Subject: RE:RE:RE:fuck u

Message: I bet you did. I bet you were touching yourself to the thought of me, weren't you? I know I'm sexy, Shizu-chan.~ There's no need to deny it.

Shizuo's grip tightens on his phone almost to the point of crushing it; the small plastic creaks angrily at the pressure.

The fuck was that? He had never thought of Izaya while jerking off! That's… That's…

The ring from Shinra's doorbell makes Shizuo jump and clumsily drop his phone, which somehow bounces under the table. Shizuo glares it, but decides to leave it there for now. He tries to calm himself as he hears Celty run up to answer the door.

Never—never in all his life had he imagined Izaya naked until now. But that's not what scared him. What scared him was that he actually found the image of Izaya naked… attractive…

Fuck.

In wobbles the man himself, clinging to a man in a professional looking white suit. And saying things like, "Ah~ Shiki is so nice for bringin' me inside. I knew ya didn't hate me, Shiki. How nice~ How nice~"

Shizuo feels his eye twitch.

Shiki drops Izaya on the couch across from Shizuo, ignoring Izaya's attempts to try and hold onto the older man. Shiki steps away from him with a frown pulling at his lips.

"Take me somewhere else," Izaya whines from the couch.

"You wanted to come here, so I took you here," Shiki replies calmly, as if he's done this a thousand times and perfected the art of dealing with drunks. "You will stay here."

"But Shizu-chan is here." Shizuo lowers his head and stares at the floor when he feels Izaya's gaze land on him - it's a glare. And usually something so civil wouldn't effect Shizuo, but it's different now. It's not only the guilt anymore. The fact that he had pictured Izaya naked just a second ago, and then in walks the informant himself, makes Shizuo feel uneasy.

"You are staying," Shiki states. He turns his attention away from Izaya and turns to Celty, and they converse for a moment via Celty's phone. Then Shiki nods at her, and gives Izaya a small nod before heading out. Once he's out the door, Izaya seems to get his voice back immediately.

"Don't want to be here," he says. "Take me home."

"You're not going anywhere in your condition, Izaya," Shinra calls from somewhere in the hallway. Izaya makes a face in the hallways direction.

"Tell him to leave," Izaya goes on. He arches his head in Shizuo's direction, for good measure, as if Shinra can see him.

"I'm not going anywhere," Shizuo says from the other couch. "I'm not leaving until Shinra does what I told him to do."

Shinra's steps out of the hallway, looking entirely innocent. "And what did you tell me to do again? I seem to have forgotten!"

Shizuo narrows his eyes, but even that doesn't seem to "remind" the brunet, since he turns and starts back towards the hallway. "I'll come out and do that whenever I remember!" he calls loudly, and then motions for Celty to follow him with a nod of his head. "For now, I'll leave him to you. Be nice! No fighting!"

"Great," Izaya scoffs once the two are out of sight, "now I'm stuck with you. This is turning out to be the worst day."

"Shut up, flea, I'm not happy to be stuck in a room with you either."

"Then leave," Izaya spits, sitting up and facing Shizuo.

"I can't."

Izaya throws his hands up dramatically and falls back against the cushions, his lips pursuing into somewhat of a frown. "The door is right there." And he points to the door, as if Shizuo has no idea where he had entered the apartment.

"I know where the fuckin' door is," Shizuo snarls. "Just shut the fuck up. Your voice is annoying."

"So sorry, Shizu-chan! I can't help what my voice box decides to sound like. Would you rather me talk like a grumpy gorilla all day long, and cuss for no reason? You seem to fancy that."

Shizuo furrows his eyebrows, and gives Izaya a quizzical stare. "I don't talk like a grumpy gorilla."

"Yes you do."

"No I don't."

"Yes. Yes, you do."

"I don't."

"You do."

"I don't."

"Yes you do, Shizu-chan."

"Shut up. I don't talk like a gorilla. Gorilla's can't speak."

Izaya fakes a gasp and brings both hands to his mouth for an added effected. "How smart of you, Shizu-chan. I never knew animals couldn't speak."

Shizuo crosses his arms, irritated. But, for once, he doesn't retort to Izaya's mouth (or throw anything at him, for that matter.) He leans back against the couch, glaring with his arms crossed, at Izaya.

Izaya's nose crinkles. "What?"

Shizuo doesn't reply.

"Stop staring at me," Izaya orders.

Shizuo doesn't reply, just continues to glower.

And so Izaya doesn't say anything either, huffing and crossing his arms also.

"It got awfully quiet all of a sudden!" Shinra's voice shouts from a deeper part of the apartment. "You didn't kill him, did you, Shizuo?"

"No," is Shizuo's immediate reply. But when he says this, he still doesn't remove his gaze from Izaya, who now decides that one of Shinra's wall is much more interesting than Shizuo's face. "He's still alive. He's just being quiet, for once."

"Oh, well... alright. Be good, remember! No fighting while mommy and daddy are talk - "

WHACK.

"Ouch! Celty dearest, why did you punch me? I didn't even say anything bad!"

A long moment of silence follows. Shizuo feels like he's been sitting there forever - staring at Izaya staring at a wall. Until -

"You wish you could kill me, don't you?"

Shizuo blinks. "Excuse me?"

"You say it all the time. Yet - " Izaya stops, his eyebrows wrinkling. "..Yet you're sitting right in front of me, and I've been drinking. Wouldn't this be the perfect opportunity?"

Shizuo swallows the lump in his throat that seems to emerge out of no where. He still doesn't peel his eyes from Izaya, watching as the brunet lowers his head and gives a weak laugh.

"An opportunity to make the world better, right? Without Orihara Izaya than 'Bukuro could be happy," Izaya continues when Shizuo stays silent. "Right? I'm right, aren't I?"

"I - " Shizuo starts.

"Fuck the Orihara's, right?" Izaya laughs, yet his tone is dark and his face is twisted with so many emotions, Shizuo can't name just one. "You know what some people tell me? The Orihara's were awful people to begin with, so who gives a shit that they died? The mom was a bitch, the sisters were obnoxious lesbians, and now the dad isn't as conceited as he once was. And that son, oh that horrible son of theirs could never care for anything, so he probably doesn't even notice that their dead!

"Even someone I thought was my friend told me that I didn't care! Even one of my clients said I must not care because I'm still working, like nothing had ever happened... Well, you know what, Shizu-chan? Fuck them!"

Shizuo's mouth had dropped open at the beginning of Izaya's rant, and now his eyes were open wide also.

Where the hell was this coming from?

"So why not kill me now and do everyone a favor?" Izaya says as he stands, and makes his way around the table until he's standing just in front of the blond. Pale fingers curl under Shizuo's chin and lift his head so that he's looking Izaya in the eye. Those eyes - fuck... Those eyes are so sad; filled with so much emotion that Shizuo wonders how they can hold so much. How can someone so small hold so much pain?

"Just," Izaya goes on. One of his hands reach down and curl around Shizuo's, leading the larger hand to his neck, where he pushes Shizuo's palm against his adam's apple. "Wrap your fingers around my neck and squeeze the life out of me."


oh god wut.

READ !

Late update is late because I suddenly lost inspiration for this fic.

So, review, please? Reviews really do help me update faster because they reassure me that people actually like my writing, and that someone is actually reading this. I need inspiration, a lot. Because I put myself down so much. SO PLEASE? I hate begging for reviews, but I really need them now. Or the next update won't come for a while, and I don't know how long that may be - until I inspire myself to continue writing again, derp.

I'm awful, I know.

Tsadde's review is actually what inspired me to write this whole chapter in one day. I love all my other reviewers just as much, but she's the one who actually made me get my ass in gear. Thank you!