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Lost in bright city lights
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Chapter Twelve - Exposure
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With no reason left to hold onto where life was taking her prior to her parents' deaths, Kate Beckett stumbles into a different world. Can she keep herself and her emotions buried deep or will everything crack open when fate throws Rick Castle her way? An AU Caskett meeting. Ficathon 2014 Entry.
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Kate takes a step back, bumping into Rick, and her hand lifts to her lips, stifling her laughter as it bubbles up inside. The grunts echoing down the only out-of-the-way corridor from the party allude to the fact that…
"Someone else is screwing in our spot." The indignation coating his words doesn't help contain her amusement either, and she angles her head over her shoulder, her eyebrows raised before she schools her features.
"How is it our spot? And that's it; we've searched everywhere. There's nowhere else that's private enough."
Why in the world can they not make party venues with more secluded spaces? Clearly, they're not the only ones looking for a bit of alone time.
"Maybe we could ask them how long they're going to be?"
Pivoting on the tips of her toes, she faces Rick, both hands on her hips as her mouth opens to reply before she shuts it again. Sometimes there is just no response.
"Okay, so not one of my brightest ideas. But..." He places his body hard against hers, his fingers stretching past the hem of her dress, under and up to reach the slight rounded edge of her ass, and slowly he inches his hands together, meeting on top of the thin white line of her thong. He doesn't stop though, traveling down the satin until he touches between her thighs. "You're so wet, and I want you so bad."
Damn him.
Using his chest to suppress the moan that escapes, she grinds onto his hands, rocks back and forth, as the pressure scrapes gloriously against her clit, all rational thought dissolving under his touch.
"We could try the restroom?" The hope in his tone combines with his fingers as they slide beneath her underwear and at this point, she's almost ready to agree to anything if he would only finish what he's started.
It's not like they haven't fucked in a bathroom before.
"You lost my good black bra last time."
"And I offered to buy you a new one." He growls his frustration and her mouth finds the tender stretch of skin below his jaw line, kissing him and his feelings better. She's just not ready for gifts, regardless of how easily he can afford them; letting him buy her the phone was hard enough. "Anyway, Kate, you're not wearing one tonight."
His hand moves from under her dress, past her hip, up until he slips a finger underneath the material at her breast, his fingertip catching the edge of her areola and everything inside her tightens in anticipation.
"That's not the point I was making."
"What was the point you were making?"
He circles the bundle of nerves between her thighs, simultaneously does the same with her nipple and her hips jerk forward, the ache that he created in the limo on the way to the party is now tearing her body in half and if she doesn't get her release soon, she's going to have to take matters into her own hands.
"Your point, Kate?"
Huh? She has no idea what the hell he is going on about. And why are they still standing here listening to another couple grunt their way to an ecstasy that she should be experiencing?
"Is it too early to get out of here?"
A flush of embarrassment heats her cheeks as she utters the question; they're supposed to be here supporting Patterson's new book, not skipping out of the party after an hour, but, as his finger dips inside of her, her care factor shrinks to zero.
"You are so the brains in this relationship, Kate."
"We should've called for the limo while we were inside, Rick. It's freezing out here."
Even wrapped in his arms, her hands buried underneath his jacket as she interlocks her fingers at the small of his back, the icy wind twirls around her legs, creeping up her dress, making the sensation between her thighs a frozen experience. The laughter that had danced within her has turned into icicles that are stabbing at her skin as they stand here on the curb.
"You should wait in there. I'll come and get you when it arrives." He moves to withdraw but she tightens her grip around him, pulls him even closer if that's at all possible.
Any closer and she'll merge them as one.
"No. Not leaving. Just keep me warm." Burying her nose into his shoulder, she inches her feet in between his, and he spreads his stance, his thighs now bracketing hers, shielding her from the cold. From the outside. From the world around them.
Minutes slide by as they stand alongside the road, the tension within Rick becoming a tight coil next to her body, his impatience seeming to increase. His shift from foot to foot is a now constant fidget and she can only wish on the stars above that their driver gets here soon.
This night is not going according to plan. At all.
"Go inside, Kate. I'll call them again." He's stepping back, no leeway in his tone, and her hands fall uselessly to her sides. It's a different aspect to him, one she's not sure what to do with and while, yes, she's beyond cold, it's mostly her fault that they're leaving so early, that they can't get away quickly, that there was no one prepared for such an early departure.
"Rick…"
Cupping her face between his hands, his thumbs trace the arch of her cheekbones, his head bending forward, his lips meeting hers, and she opens her mouth, entices him with her teeth and tongue, creating their own fire of warmth.
Maybe the night's not a complete disaster after all.
A blinding light slices through the dark, her body jerking back and away from Rick's as she stares at him, her wide eyes fluttering in confusion.
What the hell was that?
A camera's flash?
"Oh, God. No."
It's a photographer and her body becomes a ridged mess, another burst of light burning her retinas. Stars appear from behind her eyelids as she closes them against the intrusion, but the small amount of relief that comes from the darkness is short lived, her body swaying as Rick lurches from her side.
"For Fuck's sake. Leave us alone." The venom in his words has her eyes snapping open, her fingers reaching for him except there's nothing but air - he's already stalking away from her.
Her feet follow automatically, her hand reaching for his back, for the hem of his jacket, for anything that could slow him down.
"Dude. I'm just doing my job."
She can't quite see around Rick's broad shoulders, can't make out which photographer they're chasing, which one was out looking to capture that million dollar shot.
He's looking in the wrong place.
"Rick."
Coming to a halt, she stops running, has no chance really of narrowing the gap between them. Surely, he's not going to do anything stupid…
"Rick!"
For a second everything slows down. The cars driving past, the thump of her heartbeat, Rick's rush toward the paparazzi; everything blurs and bends disproportionately, spinning out of control.
"Rick!" Her voice cracks on the k as what he's about to do tears her heart apart.
It's only fair.
He was the one slowly putting it back together. It seems fitting that he will be the one who shatters it again.
The kind of press that comes with assault charges could be enough for Rick to see exactly what kind of a train wreck she is. This is all her fault. Rick's hatred of photographers is because of her, what she'd been forced to do in the past. She knows his anger stems from the circumstances that surrounded them getting together, and a sob shudders through her body.
She never meant for any of this to happen.
Throwing a glance over his shoulder, Rick's feet stumble, his body spinning back toward her, his eyes wide, and whatever it is he sees, whatever it is that is ripping her to pieces must be horrific enough to have him coming to a complete stop.
He comes back to her.
Lifting his arms, he engulfs her shoulders, his body all-encompassing as he draws her tight against him, his head burying into the angle of her neck and she slumps into the warmth that he provides.
"I'm sorry. Kate, I'm sorry. I just- I gave them my time already. I did the photo op that they wanted and I- you shouldn't be dragged into this. You shouldn't be taken advantage of just because you're with me. I'm sorry."
He breathes the words into the planes of her skin, his apology forming smudges on her neck and her hands grasp the material at his hips, bunches his shirt as she holds on with all she has.
"No, Rick, no. It's okay. It's my fault-"
The honk of a horn cuts through the rest of her sentence and both their heads turn toward the sound. The limo that they'd been waiting on is finally arriving, and as relief washes away some of the tension that had been clinging to every part of her, Kate nudges him toward the vehicle.
"Let's go, okay, let's just forget about the asshole and his camera, and get out of here."
Nodding, Rick reaches for the back door, pulls on the handle before the driver has had a chance to round the back end of the limo, and she slides in, her eyes slipping closed, so glad to be getting away from what could have been a disaster.
They dodged a bullet there.
Rick sits beside her and she opens her eyes as he flops his head back into the expensive leather, her hand reaching for him, but she stops, her fingers hovering uselessly between them.
How does she explain that she's not worth fighting for? Not worth the trouble that could have rained down on him like a torrential downpour. He has his whole life before him, he can't throw it away. Not for her.
"I'm sorry, Kate."
Her head shakes, she's not worth his apologies either, and twisting sideways, she lifts herself onto her knees, up and on top of his lap, her thumbs sliding over his lips, the quiet shush breathed from her own filling the space.
If only she were enough for him.
Placing her mouth onto the pink and red hues that are his lips, she stifles his next sorry before it can exit, the weight that sits on her shoulders becoming a little heavier as she slides her tongue along his.
He shouldn't have been in that position, felt the need to chase the photographer.
Sliding her fingers down, she pulls at his shirt, the skin of his abdomen and the dusting of hair brushing the back of her knuckles as she tugs at the clasp of his pants. The black suit he'd worn was such a good choice for him.
She wishes she were…
"Kate."
He mumbles her name into her mouth and she pulls back, her fingers no longer moving the zipper down.
"I can hear you thinking from here." His eyebrow lifts, and ignoring his comment, she leans forward, hides her face in the shadows of his neck, rakes her teeth hard into his skin, her fingers freeing him from the constraints of his boxers.
Swirling her thumb over his tip, a gutted groan overrides whatever else he was going to say, and a tear escapes the corner of her eye, slides slowly across the skin of her cheek until his shirt absorbs the moisture.
She'd been in such a rush after waking from her unexpected nap, Rick's call reminding her about the party, and in her haste to get out the door, she'd forgotten to do anything else.
The devil on her shoulder throws its pitchfork on the ground, its mouth sneering at her stupidity. A habit is a habit for a reason, and while being surrounded by Rick normally fills her senses enough that the call of cocaine can wait until she's alone - she almost always keeps it separate from him - tonight, past insecurities, past worries are boiling away, breaking the surface.
If she were making wishes, she should probably wish for a past rewritten. Wish to be more than she is.
Placing both feet onto the rug that sits underneath Rick's bed, her toes curl, her arms stretching high above her head as her back arches, her body trembling. The dark of the early morning clings to the corners of his room and she doesn't need a clock to tell her that she should be asleep.
Would be, if only she could.
Swallowing the groan of frustration that comes with being awake, she tilts her head to the side, her chin resting on the bare curve of her shoulder as she takes in the man behind her.
Rick's fast asleep. He always is when she creeps out of his loft, makes her way back to hers, goes back to the reality that is her life at least during the daylight hours. She doesn't have to check her schedule to know that it is full of auditions, photo shoots and catwalk appearances, and her eyes drift closed at what lies before her.
Working all day and night as well as keeping up with Rick whenever she has a free moment is taking its toll and the idea of crawling back under the covers sounds more than a little appealing.
Leaning down, she props herself up on an elbow, her gaze traveling over the way his features hide in the pillow, his naked back laid out before her, the comforter haphazardly tossed over the rise of his ass, and her lips tug into a smile.
Damn, it would be all too easy to ignore the tremor that's coursing through her body, ignore her long to-do list, ignore reality...
Closing the gap between them, her mouth finds its way to the firm plane of his shoulder blade, the hard muscle begging for another kiss.
She has to go.
Her eyelids flutter shut, and, pulling away, she steals one last glance at the perfect picture before her.
Too perfect for her.
Raking her fingers through her hair, she retrieves the outfit from last night, her nose wrinkling in distaste as she slides it over her head, begins the search for her thong. They hadn't bothered to take it off in the limo, but she's sure that he'd removed it before they'd crashed into his bed, and a sigh escapes.
She doesn't have the energy for this, and her head falls forward, her eyes landing on a pair of Rick's sweats.
Hell, she might as well complete the walk of shame with an outfit to match.
Tugging his pants on, she ties the string as tight as it will go, her feet silently padding across the floorboards as she makes her way out of his loft, her fingers reaching for her heels which lay discarded in the entrance way.
She casts one last glance over her shoulder, her hand pulling open the front door, and as the paper he has delivered flops onto the floor, she stretches down with her free hand. The least she can do is bring it to his side.
Grabbing the pages, she picks it up but it all falls apart, the paper raining onto the floor, the different sections spreading like angel wings before her feet.
She spots the photograph first. Her mom's smiling mouth is pulled wide, her dad's arms are wrapped around both their shoulders, and her own happiness is shining up from the page, a slap across the face.
It's her high school graduation photo.
It's from before her heart was broken, before the train crashed, before her life became nothing but dying in fragments of white powder.
Her knees crack as she falls to the floorboards, her body bending over the pages. A sob breaks her chest open.
She can't cry.
This isn't real.
Except beside that photo is another.
That's her, kissing Rick, on the curb, the headline screaming at her.
Orphaned Model Katie Snags Playboy Rick Castle. Her Own Daddy Replaced With The Ultimate Sugar Daddy!
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Thank you all so much for your reviews, glad you enjoyed a lighter moment last chapter, hold onto that... xoxo
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Thank you to Jo and Jamie for their beta and pompoms xoxo
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Thank you for reading xoxo
