I am SOOOOO sorry for the lack of updating! AP exams really threw me off my scedule! But here's the latest chapter! Sorry it's a little short!
The first thing he heard was beeping of a nearby monitor. Tamaki's eyes shot open and found himself in a bed in a room with white walls. Putting two and two together, he discovered he was in the hospital.
"Good you're awake!" chirped a nurse who had happened to be walking by to check on him. "I'll go get your doctor!" She hurried off to do so before Tamaki could say a word.
His eye ached badly and so did his stomach and sat up as best as he could and tried to recollect all of the memories from the night before. They came speeding back to him like a freight train.
After slipping the bouncer some money, Tamaki walked inside the bar.
The bar had a reasonable crowd. He made his way over to the counter and sat on an empty stool and waited for the bartender.
Shortly, the bartender came over. "What'll it be?"
"I guess I'll have some whiskey. Leave the bottle."
The bartender nodded and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels and a glass from the shelf behind him and placed them down in front of the blond boy, who eyed them cautiously. He knew that the bottle either held the perfect way to stop cutting and suppress his emotions, or the biggest mistake of his life.
Only one way to find out.
He poured his first glass and muttered. "Here's to you, Haruhi." before downing it in one go. It burned his throat and left an odd after taste. he couldn't imagine how anyone got addicted to this stuff, but he didn't want to seem like a stick in the mud.
So he poured a second glass, held his nose and downed that one.
Three glasses later, Tamaki was starting to feel a little woozy. But he was enjoying the feeling. He put down his glass and looked around. He felt like he was on a cloud now; a peaceful, gentle cloud. Like nothing bad could happen now.
As he sat there, he couldn't help but take notice of a beautiful, strawberry blond woman sitting next to him.
She couldn't help but take notice of him as well. "Hello, there." she said. "Whatcha drinking?" From her accent, appearance and broken Japanese, he could tell she was American. She had on a slinky dark blue cocktail dress, which hugged her perfect frame. On her feet were black stilettoes.
His heart pounded and he shifted his position on his stool to hide his growing boner. "Um…whiskey. It's actually really good. Warms you right up." He swallowed another glassful. Would….would you like me to b-buy you some?" The more he drank, the more he stammered. He felt it was tough to control the muscles in his face.
"Oh, but we just met." she said, inching closer. Tamaki leaned back slightly, his heart threatening to burst out his chest. "Where are my manners? We haven't even been properly introduced!" She sat back, giving Tamaki a chance to catch his breath. "I'm Lola. I'm from America."
"Yeah, I could tell from your accent," he said, hoping that wasn't rude. "I'm Tamaki." He smiled. Maybe this whiskey was exactly what he needed. "So…you've been in the country long?"
'No, I'm just here for a week on vacation."
"Cool. any particular reason you picked Japan?" He downed another glass of Whiskey, his resolve decreasing with every sip. "Was it because I'm here?" She giggled.
"Hey punk! Are you flirting with my girl?" boomed another American voice from behind him. Tamaki spun around to see a huge mountain in the shape of a man standing before him.
He sputtered, "I…I didn't know! I-I…"
"Yeah, sure you didn't know!" He grabbed Tamaki's shirt front and pulled him off the ground.
"Bruce, honey, let the poor boy be. He didn't know." protested Lola in English.
"Shut up, cunt!" he snapped.
Tamaki's English was not that good, but he knew a few nasty words (taught to him oh so generously by the twins.) and he didn't like what he was hearing. In fact it got him pretty mad. Here was this nice girl and she was being called
"Hey back off, man. If the pretty girl wants to be with me, so be it. Besides, I think she'd rather be with someone that looks human, don'tcha think?"
With a mighty throw, Bruce sent Tamaki flying across the countertop, knocking over people's drinks, and straight into the wall.
Before he had a chance to get up, Tamaki looked up to see Bruce charging at him, his fists at the ready. That was the last thing Tamaki saw before a blow to the face knocked him out.
Tamaki cringed as he remembered. That was not his finest night.
The doctor walked in just then. He was tall and had slicked back black hair.
"Hello, Tamaki, I'm Dr. Hayashi!" He held out his hand to the young teen. Tamaki shook it, taking notice of a bandage wrapped around two of his fingers. What happened to me?
The doctor immediately saw the concern on the young blonde's face. He explained, "You were in a fight at a bar. You have a broken rib, two sprained fingers as well as a bruised back and a black eye. "
So that's why he ached so much. Bruce must've beat him up. Wait a minute- Bruce!
"Where's Bruce!" The doctor looked puzzled. "Um, the guy that beat me up?"
"He's in police custody. The bartender called the cops on the fight and you were brought here by ambulance. Some cops, however, are waiting outside the room. They want to discuss with you your underage drinking…" Tamaki's eyes snapped open wide. The doctor placed an arm around him gently. "It's fine. They've already said they're letting you off with a warning because your record is clean. But I want you to promise me you'll never do something like that again. It's very dangerous for someone your age."
Tamaki nodded. "It was a stupid one-time thing. I promise I won't do it again!"
Dr. Hayashi nodded and then went to get the police officers waiting outside the room.
Later on, after he had been discharged, Tamaki took his limo home. He had been told to get plenty of bed rest and to come back for check-ups to make sure his broken rib healed properly.
When he got home, he saw another limo parked in front of the house. Immediately he recognized his father's license plate and his heart filled with dread.
He knows…
Yuzuru paced back and forth in front of the sofa, which Tamaki sat on. The younger Suoh's face was shamefully turned towards the ground. Finally his father stopped walking and sighed, placing a finger to his temple. "Son," he began. "This needs to end. First the failing your classes, then the cutting and now drinking? And the staff tells me your behavior at home has been rather…how shall I say it? Out of control?"
Tamaki nodded, his stomach twisting up with regret.
Maybe…maybe it's time I told him the truth? The truth about the anxiety and the depression and everything else…
"I don't understand what has gotten into you, my boy." Yuzuru continued. "You're usually have such a cheery disposition and stay out of trouble. " He sat down beside him. "Is it because of…because of your mother's passing?"
Tamaki shook his head. "No, but that certainly didn't help. I was, well, cutting…" he hated that word. "…way before mother died."
"Why would you do things like this, son?"
Tamaki paused before standing up, facing his father and taking a deep breath.
"Because I'm depressed, father. I've also been having anxiety attacks. It's been going on for two years now and it's just been getting worse and worse. I'm sorry, but I just didn't know how to tell you." Just say those words to him. He'll understand!
But the words couldn't come out of Tamaki's mouth. They were stuck in his throat. So he simply said, "I have no idea, father. I'm truly sorry." He bowed respectfully and then left the room to go to bed.
Once upstairs, he flopped down on his bed and began to sob into his pillow. "If I can't even tell father, who can I tell?" he murmured to himself miserably, his sobs wracking his entire body.
"Tama-chan! What happened to your eye?" piped a concerned Hunny. Tamaki cringed. After all that he'd been through in the past twenty-four hours, he had hoped no one would notice his black eye and ask questions (he had tried to cover it up with makeup, but couldn't fully hide it.) Not to mention he had been up all night and ended up with a bad migraine from lack of sleep.
Tamaki cracked a smile at the loli-boy. "It's nothing, Hunny-Senpai. I promise.
"Actually, Senpai, I, too, would like to know what happened," Haruhi interjected. "That bruise you got looks pretty bad."
Tamaki paused for a second and thought. Could he really tell them about his bar incident? The words "Drama Queen" echoed in his head in Kyoya's voice, reminding him he shouldn't say much of anything.
He covered his eye with his hand. "It-it's nothing ok? I'm fine!"
All throughout the Host Club time, Tamaki's guests were mainly concerned about his eye. Tamaki would simply change the subject or sugar-coat his way out of it."
"Tamaki, what happened to your eye?" one girl asked.
"I became so blinded by your beauty that I walked into a wall!" Not the best of replies, but he was running low on patience since everyone was hounding him.
"Why do you seem so distant today?" questioned another girl.
"Because I'm thinking about how weak your smile makes me feel!"
"Tamaki, why are your eyes so bloodshot today?"
That he couldn't really come up with an answer for. He was stumped. He usually was very good at making up smooth comebacks for the girls to swoon over, but with this monstrous headache, he couldn't focus.
He just couldn't focus on anything!
He felt his anxiety start to bubble up. What if they didn't want to request him anymore? Would that lead to him being kicked out of the club he created?
Horrible visions ran through his mind; his worst fears coming true. He'd be kicked out of the club and no one would want to be his friend anymore. He'd be a loner, a complete loser. What would he do with himself then?
A vision of a rope tied in a noose flashed across his vision and suddenly (and strangly) he felt ten times calmer. He had never before considered dying, but…
Isn't death supposed to be peaceful?
No.
He shook his head to get rid of the bad thoughts. Maybe all he needed was to step away from the room for a little while.
He stood up. "Excuse me ladies, I'll be right back." Tamaki left the room and hurried his way to the boy's room. Once there, he pushed up his sleeves, turned on the cold water and splashed some onto his face. His reflection caught his eye. The prince looked himself in the bloodshot eyes.
"Ok Suoh, you can do this. Just…go back out there and smile. Yeah! Isn't the simple act of smiling supposed to pick up your mood? I think I remember learning that in class once. Ok I've just gotta smile. I can get through this, I can-"
He stopped when the door opened. Mori stood there in the doorway and nodded to the prince with an "Mm," as his way of greeting him. He went to the sink next to Tamaki and began to wash his hands. They were covered in cake. "Mitsukuni dropped his slice of cake. I helped clean it up." Tamaki nodded, placing his hand on the counter and leaning on it.
As Mori washed his hands, something out of his peripheral vision caught his attention. He glanced over at the side of his to see something was very wrong with the arm Tamaki was leaning on. In fact, his other arm had the same problem.
"Tamaki…your wrists." That was all he had to say to send the prince into a panic to pull down his sleeves, but it was too late.
Someone, for the first time, had seen the scars.
I worked very hard on this chapter! I hope you liked it!
Review replies:
Insane lover 23: Trust me, you'll love it!
Yaoi Lover: Thanks!
Digidestined Ninja of Sunshine: I know, Tamaki's COMPLETELY OOC. But sometimes those who look the happiest can be the most depressed. It's sad but true. And I'm trying to describe his psychological issues as best I can!
Mangagurlz: Lol here's your update!
Grace: Aww you're so sweet!
eviltinyninjagirl: Thanks! And I will keep writing!
Neko Airie: Hopefully they will…before it's too late.
TheLittleDarkFox: T=Rambling is ok :D I'm glad you love the story so much!
YYxYandJxS4eva: Thanks! Here's the update lol!
AiLeiben: it's no problem! Thanks so much for reading!
JustJolola: Thanks! I got plenty this time around :3 It just helps me update. And Yeah, Kaoru's always got a good head on his shoulders in my opinion. Hikaru can blow his stack pretty easily.
xXSimplyMagicalXx: Thank you soooo much! Glad I have you hooked!
Nevie Nightmare: Lol well time to do your happy dance again!
AudreyTucker0001: *hugs* of course! I always love hugs!
Bloodyrose23: Even in the show to me she seems kind of oblivious to what she says sometimes.
kennaleez: Thanks!
