Chapter 12

Bella's Point Of View

Dream Version

This could not be heaven it was too painful for that; memories flooded my mind; mocked and tortured me.

What had I ever done to deserve this?

Running towards our meadow in the pitch black of night; noises and voices called out and played with my mind. I was too afraid to scream or cry out for help-or maybe it was because I knew no one would come for me-I was alone and very, very frightened.

Every so often I tripped and stumbled to the ground getting my clothes dirty; my skin had been scratched and torn with each fall, and I distinctly remember crying out Edward's name followed by 'He's gone.' I tried to find a clearing or a house or car or street; but there was nothing but the forest I was running circles in. I didn't exactly pay attention to where I was going; just that I knew I had to get where I was going.

Every so often I would hear what sounded like Edward's voice or Carlisle's or Alice or Jasper's.

"Bella...Bella...come home Bella. We are waiting for you to come home Bella." Alice's voice purred soft, velvet and deadly.

Or worse then Alice's voice; Carlisle's voice.

"Maybe she doesn't want to come home...maybe we should shut her out. Nothing but a human of course." Carlisle insulted me laughing like a mad man.

Jasper's voice was next.

"Maybe we should leave her alone...she does not need us here. Or at all." Jasper's voice snarled in fury in my head.

Then lastly Edward's soft, sweet and perfectly sure voice whispered to me in the darkness as I ran to try and find him.

"Run Bella...run Bella...you will never catch us Bella." He laughed darkly "Run from the monsters Bella-not towards them-they are gonna catch you Bella. You must run faster then that my love."

The words of my family caught up to me as I ran as fast as my legs would take me and choked me. I skidded to a stop and tried to fight off the cruel words of the ones I loved and failed. Desperation and fear choked me; instinct and adrenaline kicked in and a blade appeared in my hands. The glint off the stainless steel taunted and teased me as I fought the irrational urge to use it on my own body and not on my invisible in the darkness enemies; my family.

In an attempt to try and save myself I swatted the empty air around me; the blade caught on nothing but air and darkness.

I was truly useless and pathetic...even for a human.

"What's the matter little sister...can you not catch the big bad monsters. We are coming Bella...we can smell you now!" Emmett's voice snapped at me like he was vexed.

"Why...why do you want to hurt me?" I begged them breathless while I ran from nothing and everything at the same time. "Why did you leave me...why?"

All seven voices laughed at me like it was dangerously obvious; like I was missing the big picture, but I could see nothing but darkness.

"A scent so sweet...A lust so deep, it must run forever...a river of red drowns you when you sleep...beat...beat...beat...her heart must go to the beat." A voice I did not regonize called out to me. I hated riddles and now running and screaming from monsters of the night I was supposed to figure this out!

"Are you kidding me?" I screamed in my head. Can some one please...just explain to me...what I must do!"

A flash of light blinded and stunned me for only a moment; a swirl of past memories flashed in front of me like a movie.

"You really should stay away from me...I am dangerous." The familiar voice said. "It's better this way really, we really should not be friends."

What in the hell was going on!

"Aw! This is wrong Bella...I am dangerous please grasp that!" The velvet voice begged me again to listen to him.

It clicked for me right there; this was the point of my past, where Edward was trying to get me to see him as a monster-as a vampire-and I was so blinded by love I did not see it. Now that he did not love me; I could see him for the monster he truly was.

The monster that thirsted for my blood. He was the predator and I was the prey. My blood so much sweeter to him than any other-the blood lust.

Was that what the voice was trying to tell me? I was loved only for my blood-I was his blood lust-he was just waiting for an excuse. He was waiting for everyone to leave to kill me. He wanted me all to himself and I let the' lie' reel me in and dangle me like a worm on a hook.

Right then and there I realized I was in the most danger I had ever been in; in my entire life.

The person I loved and trusted; the family I loved and trusted...was nothing but a lie!

My eye lids flew open and I stared into the golden eyes of seven very watchful vampires.

"As if you could out run me." His voice whispered in my ear "As if you could fight me off." His voice reminded me "Everything about me invites you in...as if I need any of that." Edward's whispered voice laughed bitterly in my ear.

I screamed once in horror and saw the arch angel's face fall into despair and agony; he understood.

And so did I.