Chapter Twelve
My Escape
"What did you just say to me?"
Two twins stare each other down in the cavernous room of the Hitachiin estate. One, the younger, trembles slightly under the harsh scrutiny of his older brother whose fists are clenched in the potential chaos of the situation.
The younger twin brushes a strand of orange hair before turning away from his reflection. "I said…I think I'm in love with her." He unknowingly corrects himself without thinking. "With Haruhi."
His voice is shaky, but despite this he tries to stay rigid. This will not be the night he backs down against his brother.
He will not be deterred, not when it comes to this.
"I know what you said Kaoru, I was giving you a chance to change your mind." The older twin spins around incessantly, bringing two trembling fingers to his forehead in frustration. "How could you do this to me?"
"I'm not involving you in any way Hikaru I-"
"What! You're the one that pushed Haruhi and I together, you're the one who tricked us both into that date, and you are the one who's cried to me at night hoping nothing ever changes between us all." He spits in fury, words cascade through the room like fire. "Yet here you are, acting as the one who strikes first, as the one who is trying to change EVERYTHING."
Kaoru could only wince at the sound of the escaped yell from his brother; Hikaru had always been the one who was first to anger. But never before had Kaoru seen it this directed or this fierce, and in this moment the younger twin knew it was all pointed at him.
The end goal of all this threatened to lose sight. How did this all begin, was telling him the right thing to do?
"I'm not trying to change anything." Kaoru replied, speaking barely above a whisper. "I didn't set you two up on a date to be hurtful, I just thought-"
"You thought what! That it would lead me to believe you had absolutely no interest in her? Well you'd be right about that Kaoru!"
He lets out a long, drawn out sigh; this isn't going anywhere.
"Hikaru, you've seen what she's capable of, in the short time we've known her Haruhi's opened us to an entirely new world, one that for once in our lives we're actually taking part in. She makes us better, she makes mebetter."
The older twin narrows his eyes, if only he knew that these words contained more truth for him than they did his sibling.
After an eternity of silence, he speaks, harsh toned and threat level apparent. "You're not going to tell her."
"What are you going to do to stop me."
Amber eyes are unable to tear from their counterparts. Kaoru had never stood up to his brother like this before, so why now? Why were they both so determined about another person?
Because this wasn't just any person, it was Haruhi they were talking about. A girl who unknowingly had become the first person either twin allowed into the secrecy that had previously surrounded them like a thick fog.
And now that the prospect of her belonging to one of them more than the other had come into play, Hikaru could only feel himself scowl in disgust.
What was this feeling that entered the older twin; anger, jealousy, spite?
Selfishness.
That was it: selfishness. Hikaru had always been forced to share with his younger brother but he had never minded until now, because Haruhi was not something that was to be shared.
And she most certainly was not someone that was going to be claimed from him.
Their eyes portrayed more emotion than either one of them could admit, reflecting the only difference in the twins inside of them, that of the speckled patterns weaving through the amber irises.
True, they had both wielded that same amber hue since birth, but if one were to look closer the difference was apparent. Hikaru had light blue fractals running rampant through his entire iris in a chaotic array of color. Kaoru on the other hand, brandished forest green flecks that appeared to be nearly symmetrical.
This was the only difference either of them had been able to spot in each other since birth, and Kaoru had never had the heart to tell him that it was the reason Haruhi was able to tell them apart from the beginning.
Before either of them could speak, a voice beamed from upstairs, drawing them out of their silent duel. "We're ready to leave you two!"
It was their mother, who had apparently just gotten ready for the fashion event she was holding for the night.
Kaoru had actually picked this night in particular in the hopes that Hikaru wouldn't make a scene; being around fashion had always calmed the older twin's temper.
However Kaoru was too quick to confess the heavy burden that had been weighing on him for so long, and now it would seem that the night was all but ruined.
"Coming mom." He said, straightening his tie and walking out the door. A few moments later he heard Hikaru follow, seemingly unaware that for the first time in years the two weren't stepping in perfect harmony.
"There you are." Yuzuha Hitachiin spoke as soon as the twins entered the foyer, clasping her hands together in scrutiny. "Kaoru dear, your tie is crooked." She said pointing to the wrong twin. "Have Hikaru help you."
The older twin sighed as his sibling went to adjust his tie, both of them ignoring the mix up in their proper identities. Their mother was never known for her ability to decipher her own sons.
It was a pity really, but not something to linger on.
'This isn't over' Hikaru mouthed to his orange haired reflection. Kaoru could do nothing but meet his gaze, feigning yet another wince that he hoped would not waver his already defeated disposition.
He hoped that despite whatever they were both feeling now, the end would justify the means.
"That's better." The matriarch of the Hitachiins declared, "Now boys. This new line is very important to me, and you two have the important task of keeping up the Hitachiin appearance. You are both works of art; so act like it."
"Sure."
"Yeah."
Amber eyes met each other for a final time that night. Kaoru's set in awestruck surprise at their sudden incompatibility, while Hikaru's were pointed only in anger.
Did he even notice the slip up? They had always responded in the same way to such an easy question.
Hikaru was the first to look away, storming out of the door and into the warm August evening. Kaoru followed shortly after his mother, willing the relationship between brothers to be stronger than this fleeting moment.
He looked up at the stars, envying them for their simple lives as mere observers to the world below. The night sky had always been the object he looked to for comfort, yet the starlit night seemed to be dimming before his very eyes.
"Hurry up Kaoru!"
This is going to be a long night.
This is going to be a long day.
An exuberant six foot tall Host is zooming through the kitchen at record speed, occasionally knocking over packets of tea with an extended awkward limb. We've been at this for over an hour now, and before today I would've though it impossible to have had so much trouble in teaching someone how to make instant coffee.
Oh how I was wrong.
"This way?"
Hale hands me a steaming cup of coffee, blackened from being slightly burned. He has improved in the eternity that we've been here in the backroom, and as a result I've even managed to pick up on some of his strange half-Japanese half-English way of speaking.
For example, the phrase 'this way?' being muttered while handing a person a cup of burnt coffee is a round about way of asking if one is making said coffee the right way.
Which, in this circumstance, he is not.
"Close." I say after taking a reluctant sip. "Turn it off sooner."
I make a motion with my hand indicating how one would turn off a dial on a coffee pot so that he understands what I'm saying.
It would seem that in this hour I've not only managed to fail at teaching an Englishman how to make perhaps the easiest beverage in Japan, but I've also accomplished to play a pretty fair game of charades.
"Ah." He says, still wielding that gigantic smile on his face. "This way?"
I peer once more into a recently made cup and find that it's actually close to the right color and even taste properly made this time.
"Yes" I say in an exasperated tone.
Hale reminds me of Honey and Mori if you mixed them together inside of one person, he seems to have the strength, height and (occasionally) shyness of the tall cousin, and the light hair and sunny disposition of the smaller.
I wonder if he needs afternoon naps too.
"Let's get you into costume." I say motioning toward the dressing room; the other Hosts have already started without us.
It's been two weeks now since our two new Hosts have arrived and it is apparent that they were both the right choice to make, despite our shaky first encounters. I don't think I've ever seen the Club filled with so many guests before.
"Costume?" Hale asks when I hold up the pin striped suit and fedora style hat for him to wear. Tamaki has declared today as American Prohibition Era gangster day in favor of doing something new, but it still seems like a waste to me.
"Yes this is yours to wear, meet me outside when you're done and you can start serving everyone." I reply, true to his word Hale seems to understand Japanese better than he can speak it, which seems contradictory, but I haven't had the heart to mention it yet.
"Good." He says before taking off his shirt in an all too quick fashion. Of course he's as toned and muscular as the other Hosts, and I find myself blushing at the sudden unwanted exposure.
"Wait till I'm outside!" I exhale before briskly walking out the door, Hale gives me a wondering look while his shirt is caught on his head, but thankfully doesn't press the issue further.
Once I'm outside I see just how many guests have arrived this afternoon, the entire Music room looks to be filled with a sea of yellow dresses and overdone makeup. Each Host is at their respective tables save for Kyoya who's off skulking in some corner scribbling in that damn notebook.
I walk across the room to the table where Hikaru is sitting with six or so other girls surrounding him. "It's pretty busy." I say to him before sitting down, the girls around us all hush to hear what we're talking about.
"Kyoya's been holding specials, he even released a copy of this weird 'bio book' of Hale and Kenji."
"Do they know?"
"Kenji does, as always he seemed irritated. Hale just sort of did his dopey smile and walked away."
Hikaru makes this face in what would seem as his attempt at trying to mimic Hale, his eyes are as wide as plates and his mouth is agape in an excited manner that I don't think I've ever seen on the former orange-haired boy.
I throw my head back in a desperate attempt to control my laughter, and before I know it we're surrounded by at least ten other girls.
They speak in hushed tones as to not disturb us, but I can still make out what they're saying.
"Oh that's so sweet of Haruhi to take after Hikaru in his time of need."
"They're so cute together!"
"Star-crossed lovers!"
Excited shouts and giggles soon begin to pour from the entire side of the room, and before I know it an outstretched hand is pulling me in.
"They're right Haruhi, you're so sweet to take care of me." Hikaru says as he pulls me in closer; my complexion instantly sparks from pale to bright red. "Who will ever take care of you though?"
His fingers begin to caress my cheek, and the contact feels like fire against my skin.
This wouldn't be unusual behavior for Hikaru four months ago though, he always did an act like this with Kaoru.
So that's what this is, only an act.
Then why am I letting this get to me this much?
The girls around us lean into to our intertwining figures, but I'm barely aware of them. Hikaru speaks just above a whisper, "If you want, maybe we could take care of each other…"
Time around us begins to slow, and I find myself becoming painfully aware of what's happening. My chest feels as though it's ready to spill out onto the floor from beating so fast, and I'm all but powerless to stop it.
This is just an act; he's doing it for everyone else. I repeat over and over to myself.
But even as I look into those eyes, I can see they're as wide as ever, and his fingers are trembling against my heated skin. He's nervous; which could only mean that this moment…
Is real.
"What are you two doing?" a small figure leaps in between Hikaru and I, separating the contact between us instantly. I look over at him through a head of black hair and see the disbelief marked across his face, almost as if he's relieved.
"We're Hosting Kenji." Hikaru says after a minute of collecting his composure, a bead of sweat comes across his brow and the girls around us sigh in disappointment.
"Didn't look like Hosting to me, but what do I know?" the small teen says while crossing his arms, causing the girls to direct their attention toward him.
"He's so cute when he pouts!"
"I'd love to just smother him with affection!"
Kenji's eyebrows peak in interest, suddenly forgetting his interruption. "Would you now?" he says while spreading his arms across the two of us pulling us in. "What about the three of us then?"
And the crowd goes wild.
"Forbidden love times three!"
"So sexy!"
"So unprovoked!"
"Tea?"
We each draw our attention to the tall figure that's randomly appeared before us holding a tray of jasmine colored china.
"Hale?" I ask pointlessly, I had all but forgotten leaving him behind to change.
Kenji releases us muttering something about ruining his fun but is still sure to collect all of the girls back toward his table, leaving the three of us alone.
Hale sets the tray down before us, sighing heavily as he rests his head against the back of the chair. "The princesses are very…"
"Crazy." Hikaru responds with his trademark smirk, Hale only nods his head in response.
The auburn haired teen leans into the tall figure, "Here's what you should tell them..." he says before whispering something into Hale's ear. The teen's eyes peak as he nods into whatever Hikaru is saying, "Thank you Boss." He says before picking up his tray and walking to another table.
Hikaru laughs heartily, "I'm pretty sure he thinks everyone is 'Boss'"
"He calls me by my name, what did you tell him? And what was the deal back there?"
"Hmm?"
"Pulling me in like that, you were doing the whole 'brotherly love' thing on me."
"I don't think that's what it's called if you're not my brother."
"Then what was it?"
"It was fun, now watch." He's a little too quick to answer, and almost refuses to look me in the eye when he says it. But I don't have the energy to press the matter any further and instead direct my attention to the new Host walking up to Tamaki's table.
"Hale." Tamaki says, brushing away a strand of hair, he motions toward the flock of guests around him, "Princesses I'm sure you've each had the pleasure of meeting our newest assistant Hale. He hopes to be a full fledged Host one day but the poor dear barely speaks a lick of Japanese."
Like clockwork a regular guest of the statuesque blonde speaks up, "Tamaki you're so valiant to take some poor soul in, the hardships he must come across!"
"What spirit you have!"
Hale smiles at the clueless girls surrounding the two and begins to pour each of them a cup of tea. "Princesses." He says while the liquid begins to steam. "Your bodies make me very hard."
My mouth drops, "You didn't…"
"I did."
The entire room goes silent save for the sound of pouring tea. The girl Hale had directed his 'compliment' to is latent with sheer incredulity; Tamaki's hand is still frozen in his hair.
Finally, she opens her mouth to speak, and I cringe at the verbal abuse Hale is about to receive at her hands.
"So cute!"
"He's helpless! And so sexy!"
"I'll be your translator any day!"
Tamaki's guests each flock around Hale, smoothing out the wrinkles in his suit and fawning around his every move. Bright green eyes flutter with suspicion before he let's himself relax, laughing slightly under the confusion of the situation.
Hikaru sighs next to me, "Well that wasn't what I was expecting."
"What does he think he's saying?"
"Your beauty has no comparison!" He responds, waving his hands in a dramatic way to emphasize how ridiculous that phrase already sounds.
"You are the worst kind of person." I say through a laugh, clutching my ribs from the jolting motion coming from them.
Hikaru starts to laugh as well; tears pouring out of his eyes from the ferocity. "I know, I know."
Across the room Kyoya looks up at us, eyeing darkly through mirrored lenses. This doesn't do much to quell either of us however, and before I know it both of us are on the floor writhing in laughter.
After a moment Hikaru speaks, and I'm instantly aware of how close our faces have come to each other once again.
"Let me take you home again, I have a surprise for you." He says to me, eyes peering just barely below a messy field of auburn.
"S-sure." I manage to stutter out before we both rise again to claim our helmets. The girls start to flock out of the room, and eventually all we're left with is a few Hosts and empty tables.
"Great job today everyone! I hope you two are excited for the trip that's coming up in a couple weeks!" Tamaki beams.
"Venice? It's not like I haven't been there before." Kenji says from the shadowed area of the room, "But it would be nice to have some alone time with each of you."
I manage a faint shudder at his creepy proposal; I'm pretty sure Kenji still thinks I'm a boy, but I'm never sure which gender he's aiming for. Do I ask him and end all this speculation?
"Kenji don't be creepy." Hikaru says, putting his hand once more on the small of my back, "Come on Haruhi. See you guys later."
In the distance I notice Tamaki's eyes glow with what looks to be anger, but he completely silent as we both walk out of the room and into the parking lot.
Hikaru throws me a jacket out of one of the saddlebags of the bike, but in a confusing manner motions me to get on the bike before he does.
"What are you-" "I'm teaching you to drive, it'll be fun." He says, pointing to the seat once more. "Trust me."
Tentatively I swing a leg over the seat and grip the handlebars, feeling off balance as soon as he gets on behind me. "Hikaru I don't know…"
He grabs my hand and puts it over several components, "Brake, Accelerator." He points to a metal bar near my feet next, "Clutch. That's all you need to know, everything else is similar to a car, except only two wheels and a lot more fun. Just be careful when you start it beca-"
"Like this?" I ask gripping the handlebars once more. Suddenly the bike lurches forward, causing me to give out a loud yelp before it stops again.
"Because it can jump if you do that…" A voice says behind me. I look down to my waist and see that his arms are wrapped tightly around my figure, much in the same way that I hold on to his chest. I breathe a sigh of relief that he didn't choose the same location to grab onto, and start the bike once more.
This time it whirs to life, and before I know it I'm driving down the road to my apartment. Leaves fly past us in fall's ever lingering embrace, and I'm unable to contain the smile spreading across my face in the freedom it brings.
"See, you're a natural." He says, occasionally directing me whenever the situation calls for it.
After a minute of silence I'm confident enough to bring up conversation. "Thank you Hikaru, this is amazing."
He grips my waist tighter in response, and even though he's in back of me I can sense that smirk across his face. "No problem." He says, "You've seemed so stressed lately I figured you could use a break."
"Speaking of stress, Kyoya says that my father was transferred again, a minimum security prison this time. He said I'll get to call him as soon as the lawyer's done getting everything."
He pauses for quite some time before responding, "Oh?"
"Yeah, it's about time right?"
"I guess."
Uh oh…
I slow the bike down as we near my apartment; to no surprise Honey's driver is parked in one of the spaces across the street. Honey himself is probably already inside.
"What's wrong?" I say while getting off the bike, he follows shortly after and begins to unstrap my helmet.
He looks straight into my eyes and exhales a long drawn out sigh, "Haruhi I just don't want to talk about your dad. I think it's pretty obvious why."
"What do you mean?" "You know what I mean, the reason he's in prison as we speak."
"You don't think he's to blame for Kaoru's death do you?"
He winces at the mention of his brother, and tries to look anywhere but at me when he speaks. "He was in the car Haruhi…what am I supposed to say?"
"He had nothing to do with it!"
Suddenly we're both trying to overpower each other's volume, "He didn't have to get in the car! He could've stopped his so-called 'friend' from driving too! But he didn't Haruhi, and now my brother's dead because of it!"
We're both shaking from the outburst pouring out of our figures; I don't know what to do anymore.
"What am I supposed to do Hikaru? He's all I have left."
"Is that what you think?" He says, grabbing onto my shoulders as he speaks.
The trembling motion from his hands is only reflected in ferocity by my entire being, and I suddenly find it difficult to look him in the eyes.
"You don't have to choose someone who's already let you down, you have all of us…You have me."
"If you're expecting me to choose between anyone, then I've already let you down."
His eyes close as I visibly see him start to disappear inside of himself. Tears start to prick the corner of my eyes.
Please, don't do this to me; don't let it all end because of this one moment.
Before I'm able to react I'm pulled into an embrace by the figure before me. His rough hands clutch my entire frame like a prayer, and I can hear him exhaling softly into my ear.
It's only until I begin to feel wet droplets rolling onto my shoulder that he timidly speaks.
"I'm sorry. I just don't know what to think, I don't know if I can forgive him yet Haruhi."
I'm torn on the impulse to argue with him or comfort him at this point, he's right to be angry. But if I acknowledge it too that does that mean I feel the same way?
Does it mean I'd be turning my back on family?
A memory of an orange-haired teen comes to mind, one with glowing amber eyes that wield iridescent green flecks throughout them. He's smiling, happy because of something as simple as an ordinary day…
And I'll never get to see him that way again.
"Me neither." I say, weaving my arms along the lonely sibling's frame; he feels warm, like an everlasting sun between us. "But I have to try Hikaru."
He let's out a long, drawn-out sigh and I can sense his entire figure visibly relaxing. Eventually he pulls away, finally looking into my eyes, and together we make a silent promise that breaks the darkness in each of our souls.
"Then I guess I will too."
