Sorry for the late update! Obs posting is crazy! But thank you all who took the time to review my story! Thanks for the constructive and encouraging reviews I really appreciate them.

Bailey's POV

I grab an oxygen intubator and shove it down Grey's throat. Whatever it takes to get her to breathe again. I squeeze the oxygen tube, and look at the monitor. She's flatlining.

'Get a crash cart!' I cry out loud.

I take out the defibrillator and pause for a second. I can't do this. Not on a pregnant woman. But I have no choice now. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

' Charge to 300!' I press the paddles on her chest. No response.

'Charge to 400!' Her chest jerks up from the impact of the strong current. But she is still flatlining.

I sigh in defeat and put the paddles down.

She didn't even tell me that she is pregnant. Had I known, I would not have let her get in contact with the H1N1 patients. But it's too late now…

'Grey, page Sheperd now.' I order the younger Grey.

She nods and walks out of the room, pressing on the pager, with tears in her eyes.

'TRY AGAIN!' a stern voice jerks me back to action.

Yang is now standing at the foot of the bed, her eyes narrowed at me like she means business.

' I said, try again!' she repeats. 'If she could survive being underwater for 3 hours, I know she can survive this!'

Yang has a point.

' Charge to 500…and now!' I press the paddles down on Grey's chest one more time…. clinging on to the slim chance that she can still be saved.

Suddenly there is some activity on the monitor. I stare the monitor…hoping, wishing, praying…..

'I see a sinus rhythm!' I cry out.

'I think she stirred' says Yang. She rushes to the side of her friend's bed.

'Mer…please open your eyes. Open your eyes for me please…' she pleaded as she cupped her friend's pale face.

I stand at the doorway and watch them, my eyes beginning to wet with tears.

After a while, I think I see the pair of green eyes, the eyes that had always looked up to me with full of respect…..flutter open.

' Oh Mer…you're awake! Don't you ever leave me again! This is the second time you've given me such a scare, I'm never going to forgive you ever again!'

Yang is now sobbing uncontrollably.

I walk out of the room, giving my two residents some privacy.

'Hey!' I cry as somebody bumped hard into me and ran away without uttering a word of apology. This is one of my pet peeves, rude stuck up people oblivious to the world around them.

I look up in time to see Dr. Sheperd running into Grey's room, still in his scrubs. He must have been in the middle of a surgery.

I peer into the room to see Grey now wide awake, with Yang and Sheperd by her side. And smile to myself.

What a narrow escape! I honestly don't know what I would've done should anything happen to Grey. I would've lost my mind had I lost her! Because she is my baby. And I cannot afford to lose her. Not after we had lost O Malley. Not after we almost lost Stevens. They are my babies, whom I had raised since their very first day as fresh interns. Even though they make mistakes- losing track of their own interns, cutting LVAD wires, signing DNRs, drowning themselves, placing their hands on bomb cavities, joining the army, throwing themselves in front of buses – but still I am proud of them. I had raised them well, to be capable, efficient, smart, reliable and confident surgeons. I just can't afford to lose another one of them!

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I am now standing in front of the Chief in his office. . He is pacing up and down like he always does, when something is bothering him.

' She's ok now?' his voice is full of concern.

'Yes, Chief, she's fine now…. We're keeping her under close observation.'

' Yes, you'd better. You know how much she means to me. I'm going to check on her later in the afternoon.'

' Yes, sir.'

He clears his throat.

' So…have you decided? Paeds or General Surgery?'

'General Surgery Sir'.

His eyes widened in surprise.

' Really? So you've decided to pursue General Surgery after all?' I can sense the excitement in his voice.

'Yes, Sir. I…just don't think I can handle Paediatrics Sir.'

'Why not?'

' Because I don't think I can handle losing anymore babies Sir. I've lost one of my babies and almost lost a couple more...this is all taking an emotional toll on me. I…just don't think I can handle any more of that…it breaks my heart to see babies, whether they are mine or not, …die!' my voice was shaking, and I can feel tears welling up in my eyes again.

'So yeah….this is my final decision, Chief.' I say after I regain my composure.

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A little while later, I am walking down the corridors of the hospital, still pondering over my decision. I hope, I really hope that I had made the correct decision. The best decision, which will be in my and everyone else's best interest. My husband will not divorce me, I can get to spend more time with my son…. I would not be such an emotional wreck…..

I am jerked back to reality by a familiar voice saying out loud

' I mean seriously? It was nothing. Just a little fun loving during my younger years. I don't know why it would resurface again after 10 years. And who the hell would have such spite or revenge on me that they had to upload it onto Youtube? Clearly someone hates me and is out for revenge!'

' Well, maybe you should repent. You know, confess your sins before God……He will forgive you….'

' Callie, since when have you become such a religious person!'

' I'm not….well ever since I know that I'm a sinner….'

Just then, Mark Sloan and Callie Torres stop their chatter and look at me.

' Dr. Bailey? Are you ok? You look like you've been hit by a hurricane or something….'

Dr. Torres asks with concern.

'Umm…yes…I'm fine….it was just….Look I'll tell you about it later….' I say, walking away, pretending not to have listened to what they were talking about earlier.

'Dr. Bailey!' this time a perky voice interrupts my thoughts.

I look up to see Dr. Arizona Robbins, the paediatric surgeon, smiling at me. (Gosh, why is she always smiling, always so cheerful? Does she ever have bad days?)

'I just wanted to let you know that I'm performing a bone marrow transplant on a 10 year old leukaemia patient this afternoon. Wanna scrub in?' he voice was so jovial, making it hard to turn her down.

' Actually Dr. Robbins….I …I have decided on General Surgery after all.' I say hurriedly, without looking at her face.

I then walk away, without bothering to see what the expression on her face might be.

Had I bothered to look, it was an expression of confusion mixed with disappointment.

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I am now in the Operating Theatre. There is a thrilled expression on my face. I am now operating the brand new robot that the Chief had bought me not too long ago. Now I am anxious and eager to test my brand new toy on my next surgery, a colectomy.

'Yes!' I cry as I watch the robot remove the gangrenous section of the colon. I had successfully performed my first robot assisted surgery! Everything else that had happened today now pales in comparison to this.

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I am now alone in On Call Room 3, which was miraculously unoccupied when I entered it. ( This room is somehow always occupied on normal days).

The events of the day has worn down on me. I had just visited Stevens and Grey, and was pleased that they are both stabilized and doing well now.

If only OMalley is doing fine now too. In times of solitude like this, I begin to wonder, is he looking down at us from heaven? Ever since he left, I felt like I had lost one of my children. Because he had been one of my children, one of my babies. When he left, a part of me was torn apart.

He was the one who always had to fight hard to prove himself. He struggled through his internship, he struggled through his residency. But he was a fighter. He never gave up.

And he was the one who helped me deliver my son, Tucker Jr..

I pick up my cell phone and dial my house number.

'Hello?' a female voice answers.

' Hey Stephanie, is Tucker there? Is he asleep?'

' No…he's watching TV at the moment. Wait…let me get him.'

'Momma!' I hear the oh so familiar voice at the other end of the phone.

'Tucker… you're not asleep yet?'

'No momma, I'm watching Barney!'

'How was school today Tucker? Did you punch anyone?'

'No momma, I was a good boy today.'

' Was anyone nasty to you?'

' No…except for this one guy who refused to share sweets with me. But I didn't punch him though.'

' That's mommas good boy.'

'Momma? When are you coming home?' that question always breaks my heart.

'I've work to do, dear. I 'll come home as soon as I finish work. Ok?'

'Ok.' He sounds sad now.

Do you want me to sing a song to you before you sleep?'

I begin to softly sing the tune 'Somewhere Over The Rainbow' until there was silence at the other end of the line.

I put down the phone and sigh to myself. I wish that I can be there for my son. And there was still a lot of patching up to be done between me and Tucker Sr. but that can wait. For now, I hope that everything is going to be just fine.

Just when I thought I could have some peace and quiet, my cellphone rings.

I groan to myself as I pick it up.

And gasp in shock as I see the caller ID.

'Hey….do you miss me? It has been a long time, hasn't it? I wonder if anything has changed over there….' the voice at the other end of the phone still sounds so familiar.

' Addison?'

' I'm coming over to Seattle Grace tomorrow. My ex-husband has called for me. Apparently my services are needed here… '

' Oh yes, a lot has changed here.' I tell my old friend.

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Ha…look who is back! ;)

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