A/N: I'm so sorry about the wait. But this is one long ass chapter. Also, it's a little sexual so if that stuff bugs you…I'm sorry.
Disclaimer: I don't own One Tree Hill
Chapter Twelve: Who Has the Upper Hand Now?
She flattened her skirt for the thirtieth time that hour. She was nervous sitting and waiting for Lucas to pick her up. She hated staying idle. It made her think about Lucas, more specifically she overanalyzed his actions and words. She was an emotional wreck. She hadn't seen Lucas since he asked to take her to the wedding. They had talked a little over the phone, arranging times for him to see his kids, but she was always at work when he picked them up and dropped them off.
Was it so wrong that she wanted to impress him tonight? She was determined to make him regret every moment he hadn't wanted her. According to Haley, the outfit she was wearing definitely did that. She had chosen a pale pink skirt that just skimmed her knee and a matching silk sleeveless top. The outfit clung tightly to her curves, but was loose enough to leave some room to imagine. Her heels were not too high. She was making sure Lucas would still be taller than her. All in all, she looked hot, especially for a woman who had given birth to four kids.
"Knock, knock," Jake called from the other side of her door.
"Come in," Peyton replied. Jake entered her room. Since Lucas returned, Peyton and Jake's relationship had been strained. He still lived with her and slept in their bed, but they didn't talk much and if they did, it was about the kids. It reminded Peyton of her relationship with Lucas before his leaving. Only difference as Peyton knew Jake loved her.
"How do I look?" Peyton asked.
"Beautiful, as always," Jake said with a smile as he took her shaking hands. He furrowed his eyebrows.
"I'm nervous," Peyton explained.
"No shit."
"It's just…I want to look perfect."
"You are perfect, Peyt," Jake said pushing some of her curls back of her face, "He's gonna love you."
"It's not about him," Peyton lied.
"It always is. Even when it's not," Jake said softly. Peyton nodded knowingly before wrapping her arms around his waist. He hugged her back.
"I missed you," Peyton said.
"I just saw you a half hour ago," Jake chuckled.
"I meant I missed this. The hugs. The closeness." Jake pulled back and held her shoulders looking her in the eyes.
"I pulled away because I have to make sure you can stand on your own. I want you to be strong enough to deal with Lucas."
"I guess it really is always about him."
"I'm still here for you, babe. And I still love you. You'll be happy with Lucas."
"Jake, why does it feel like you're making this choice for me?"
"Peyt, don't give me false hope. We've always been honest with each other. So, I need you to tell me if there really is a choice or if you've already chosen him."
"I'm just giving him a second chance." It was a devious answer. Peyton knew that. She had pretty much made her choice, but she wasn't ready to let Jake go. It was selfish. But it was also self-preservation. She still wasn't sure if Lucas was being sincere when he said he loved her. If Lucas hurt her again, she would need Jake to fall back on.
"Ok," Jake nodded, "That seems fair." The doorbell rang before another word could be exchanged. Peyton's eyes darted around the room.
"I can't do this," Peyton said wringing her hands.
"Yes, you can, babe." He placed a small kiss on her forehead, "You'll be fine." Peyton nodded unsurely as Jake headed for the front door.
"What are you going to do today?" Peyton asked as she exited the room behind him.
"Umm," Jake said, "I was going to take the kids to Karen's. She mentioned needing help decorating the café for Christmas. I figure the kids would enjoy that."
"Good idea," Peyton said stretching her arms. She looked at her bare left hand and panicked, "Oh shit! I forgot my wedding ring! Let Lucas in while I grab it." Peyton scurried back to her room while Jake sighed and opened the door. There was Lucas Scott, in all his glory, wearing a neat black tux. Jake surveyed Lucas's overall appearance. A background in psychology aided him greatly in reading people. And he could tell that Lucas was nervous. His eyes were darting around the room, he had shoved his hands in his pockets quickly, and he kept shifting his feet.
"Lucas Scott," Jake said disapprovingly. He let Lucas step inside.
"Jake." There was no emotion in Lucas's voice.
"Peyton just went to grab her wedding ring. She'll be right out," Jake said turning to leave. He paused and turned back, a smirk on his face, "If you forgot, that's the thing you wear on your left hand to prove you're committed to someone. I know you have issues with the whole "c" word."
"I'm still wearing mine," Lucas said darkly, "See!" Lucas showed him a finger as proof.
"Wrong finger," Jake said unamused.
"Oops," Luke lowered his middle finger and instead pointed to his ring finger, where a white gold band glittered. "There you go."
"You're a child." Jake rolled his eyes. As he did, Peyton returned from her room.
"I hope you boys were being good." Lucas was basically speechless at the sight of her, his jaw glued to the floor. His eyes scanned over her body. She looked beautiful. She looked sexy. He just wanted to take her right there in the front room, whether or not Jake was watching. He watched as she and Jake said their goodbyes. Unfortunately, it was all in slow motion with the sound off in his mind. He saw Jake leave, and they were suddenly alone. She gave him a shy smile.
"Hey Luke," she said softly.
"You look…perfect," He stepped forward and leaned down to give her a small kiss on the cheek. She blushed slightly.
"Thanks. You look pretty sharp yourself," she said fixing his tie.
"Where are the kids?" he managed to stutter out. The scent of her perfume was assaulting his senses, and his eyes were fixed on the sharp curve of her neck.
"Nathan and Haley took them to visit your dad. I was hoping we'd catch them before we left."
"Nathan and Haley aren't going to the wedding?"
"Just the reception."
"Oh," he said as she stepped back.
"So?" she asked.
"So…"
"Shouldn't we leave now?"
"Oh! Yeah we should," Lucas nodded.
"Am I making you nervous?" a sly smile spread on her face.
"Extremely."
"Good." Peyton chuckled as she walked to the door. Lucas followed her out.
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The church was packed with friends and family. Masses of white and pink flowers clung to the ends of each pew. White satin dipped from pew to pew. A line of men assembled at the front of the church awaiting the bridesmaids dressed in flowing pink dresses. The bride stood at the back in her poofy white dress, a glowing smile on her face.
Peyton watched as the bridesmaids processed in. She always pictured Haley and Bevin and Brooke walking in at her wedding. Next came Bevin escorted by her dad, and Peyton closed her eyes envisioning what it would have been like for her to walk down that aisle with her father. She looked up at the altar, where a beaming Mouth waited, wearing a smile that only a man who truly loved his wife could wear. She glanced over at Lucas who was watching Bevin with a small smile on his face. She never got the beaming husband. She never got the pleasure of having her dad walk her up the aisle. She never got bridesmaids. And most importantly, Brooke was not at her wedding. Instead she had unintentionally ruined it.
Lucas saw the look that haunted his wife's eyes. She looked tired and sad. He had caused most of it. The worry. The fear. The feeling that she wasn't worthy of anything. He hadn't even given her a proper wedding. He watched the sad smile that graced her face as she watched Mouth remove Bevin's veil and stare into her eyes. That was love. The type of love she wanted. The type of love he had been searching for. The type of love he felt now for the woman at his side. He just wished she trusted him. He didn't blame her for worrying about his intentions. How could she trust someone who had broken her so many times before, lied to her constantly and probably most disappointingly, left her. People always left her. And long ago he had promised he wouldn't leave. She had promised the same. Only one of them lived up to that.
He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't even realize that Mouth and Bevin were already getting ready to exchange vows.
"Marvin and Bevin have come here today to join in the union of marriage before God, their friends and family. They have chosen to write their own vows." The priest motioned for Bevin to start.
"Marvin," Bevin began with a soft smile, "I've never been good with words and I'm not really that smart-"
"Bev, you're brilliant," Mouth interrupted.
"Thank you," she blushed squeezing his hands that were in hers, "But my point is I didn't know exactly how to explain my love for you. To this day, I'm still trying to figure it out." Bevin paused to take a deep breath. "When you and I first met, I was the ditzy cheerleader and you were the quiet guy who was Brooke Davis's lackey." Peyton tensed at the name, and Lucas looked down shamefully as Bevin continued, "And we were never really close but that al changed during freshman year at college. It was just you, me and Sk-Skillz," she stuttered over the name and froze. Mouth leaned in close to her ear and whispered something. She shook her head in response and continued, "When Skillz was taken from me, I thought my life was over. There was nothing left to live for. He had left me alone, unwillingly of course, but that didn't make it any easier." Another pregnant pause passed where everyone's mind lingered on the man, Skillz Taylor, who had passed away suddenly almost five years ago. "I didn't think I could ever love again after that. But that didn't stop you from loving me and taking care of me. Even when you weren't sure I'd ever love you back. And eventually my pain ebbed away, and I got my closure. And there you were waiting for me. And I thank you for teaching me to love again. It's one of the reasons I know I will always love you." At this exact moment, Peyton and Lucas stole a glance at each other and wound up locking eyes. It was their story only some of the details had changed. Lucas reached over and rested his hand on her thing, his eyes not leaving hers. Peyton tensed slightly, but she didn't shake his hand off like she intended to. Instead she just looked away. Lucas traced a small circle there trying to get her to relax. When she finally did, he smiled. Mouth began his vows.
"Bevin," Mouth said, "I have loved you for so long now. I mean even when you were with Skillz. But I loved you enough to know that the most important thing was your happiness. I stayed back and smiled at you two because it made me happy seeing that beautiful smile. I always believed in fate. In the idea that if you and I were meant to be, it would happen. I just wish more than anything that it hadn't happened this way. But we made something out of it, didn't we?" Bevin and Mouth exchanged a quick smile before they continued on, "Even when I doubted your love, I never doubted mine, and I never doubted we would find our way. That if I gave enough time, you would see what I say and feel what I felt." It was at this moment, a tear slid down Peyton's cheek as she listened to Mouth almost retell her story in his own words. She glanced over at Lucas and saw that he was watching Mouth intently. She brought her gaze to his hand still lingering on her thigh. Slowly, she slid her hand on top of his and squeezed it gently. Lucas felt the sudden contact, and his eyes snapped up to her face. They stared at each other as Mouth said his last words.
"I knew you'd realize we were meant to be."
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"And now ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you all to turn your attention to the dance floor where Marvin and Bevin will share their first dance."
Lucas and Peyton clapped loudly from their table as Bevin and Mouth began to waltz to "I'll Be." The lights on the dance floor dimmed drastically creating a blanket of darkness lit only by the moonlight shining through the glass ceiling and the candle lights surrounding it. It was very romantic.
"I love her dress," Haley said as the clapping died down. Lucas and Peyton had been placed at a table with Nathan and Haley.
"It's gorgeous," Peyton nodded, "It kind of looks like your dress."
"From which wedding? First or second?" Haley asked.
"Rub it in," Peyton joked.
"Hey! Your wedding was nice," Haley said. She immediately wanted to take back the words.
"It wasn't bad," Peyton said softly as she sipped her wine. Lucas surveyed her carefully.
"It was bad," he admitted, "You deserved better." Peyton smiled a bit at him.
"Well truer words were never spoken," Nathan said crossing his arms, "Speaking of better, how's Jake?" Lucas glared at his brother, and Haley kicked her husband under the table causing him to flinch.
"He's fine," Peyton answered uncomfortably, "A little busy with Jenny and Nikki."
"That's good. He's a good guy."
"Yeah he is," Lucas said, looking down at his hands folded in his lap. Peyton gave Nathan a look as he feigned innocence.
"Peyton, I'll be right back," Lucas said as he stood suddenly.
"Ok," she nodded watching as he headed outside to have a cigarette. He still hadn't totally broken the habit.
"Nathan," Peyton hissed.
"What? It's not like I lied."
"Listen Nate and listen good," Peyton said in a low voice, "The only person who's allowed to make Lucas's night miserable is me. And as far as I am concerned, Luke is still my husband and Jake is a friend. F-R-I-E-N-D Friend!"
"Fine," Nathan sighed disappointingly. He looked out to the dance floor. "Hey, how about I make it up to you with a dance?"
"But this a pretty fast beat."
"So?"
"You suck at dancing."
"Oh is that a fact?" Nathan raised an eyebrow before standing up and offering Peyton his hand. "Come on Sawyer." Peyton smirked and accepted the offer.
Lucas walked back and saw his wife dancing to some upbeat oldies song with. He thought it might be "Shake Your Body" by Michael Jackson. He loitered by the DJ booth, a soft smile on his face. His eyes were captivated by the way her hips swayed to the music, the way she lightly flipped her hair over her shoulder, the way her legs twirled around the floor.
"I have a request," Lucas said suddenly to the DJ.
"Sure thing. What do you have in mind?"
"Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith."
"Is it for anyone special?" Lucas smirked and whispered something in the DJ's ear. He nodded and set up the song.
"All right everyone this next song is dedicated to Goldilocks from Rakeboy." Peyton blushed bright red when the song reached her ears. Peyton's eyes darted around the room looking for Lucas. There he was leaning against the DJ table. Their eyes locked for a second and Lucas slowly made his way over to her.
"It's our song," Peyton whispered.
"I know. It's why I picked it."
"I'm surprised you remembered."
"Of course, I did."
Flashback
"So how does it feel to be Mrs. Lucas Scott?" Lucas asked as they made their way home to their apartment. They were on their way home from the courthouse, the ink on the marriage certificate barely dry. Peyton reached up and touched her sore cheek. It had been bruised from the accident.
"I feel the same," she said shrugging her shoulders. An awkward silence settled for a moment, "How does it feel to be married to me?"
"Not bad," he smirked. The old, fun-loving Peyton would have reached over and slapped in good fun, but the new brooding Peyton just smiled lightly and looked out the window. His smile fell quickly. "I'm sorry you didn't get a big wedding like you wanted. Maybe we can renew our vows like Nathan and Haley did after Joshua's born."
"You mean Elizabeth," Peyton said patting her stomach.
"Sorry Peyt. You're having a boy."
"I think you're wrong," Peyton said, smiling. He loved to see her smile.
"Well how about we settle this," Lucas said, "I'll turn on the radio and if the song is sung by a band starting with the letters A-M then it's a girl. If it's N-Z, it's a boy." Peyton mulled over it for a second.
"Ok." Lucas reached down and turned on the radio. "Don't Want to Miss a Thing" was just starting.
"Aerosmith," Lucas said nodding his head.
"I believe I win," Peyton said, "We're having a girl."
"You know what else this means?" Lucas said.
"What?"
"This is our song." Peyton's eyes met his and she nodded.
End Flashback
"We did have a girl, you know?" Peyton said.
"You cheated though. You knew that 97.1 was having their all Aerosmith hour."
"Oh well," Peyton sighed. Lucas offered her his hand.
"Dance with me, please." Peyton took his hand as he led her to the darkest corner of the dance floor. She tentatively placed her hand on his shoulder as he interlocked her right hand in his left. His arm wrapped around her waist, his fingers lingering on the small strip of exposed skin between her skirt and top. She took a deep breath and when she let it out, it grazed Lucas's neck. They swayed in silence to the beat.
About halfway through the song, Lucas couldn't handle the power she had over him. Every shift of her hips, every move of her fingers made him fall more and more under her spell. The spell he'd been fighting for seven years. Well more like eleven years if you counted high school. Now, the images flashing through his mind were things definitely not appropriate for their setting, but he couldn't help it. His mind was a haze, clouded by deep rooted love and lust.
"You know what I was thinking Peyton?" he whispered softly as he pulled her slightly closer.
"What?" she said, trying to ignore the shiver that ran up her back when his words vibrated against her ear. He bent his head down to her ear.
"I love you," he said, "More than you'll ever know."
"Don't ruin this," she said softly. He knew she was cracking.
"You know what else I realized," he said as he stroked the small piece of exposed skin on her back. "We've never actually made love." His lips were now almost stroking her ear with each word. She tried to cover the fact that her breath was catching in her throat, but it didn't work. "I mean we've had sex, but we've never made love. I think that I could prove how I much I love you if you let me show you." He planted a couple small kisses on the curve of her ear.
"That's just lust." Peyton sighed turning her head to see if anyone was watching. Luckily, everyone was in their own world. Unfortunately the moment she turned her head, she gave Lucas better access to her neck. His lips landed where her jaw and neck met right below her ear.
"No," Lucas mumbled into her skin, "It would be love. I'd start by kissing you softly, almost too lightly. It would be so soft you'd wonder if my lips were even touching yours. Then, I'd be a little more forceful, my tongue sweeping over yours, tangling them together."
"Lucas-"
"Kisses down your neck. My tongue spelling out my name, claiming you as mine forever. Next, I'd undress you slowly, enjoying every moment of it."
"Lucas Scott, this isn't the place," Peyton whispered. She was enjoying this way too much. The words she'd never heard from him before. But this was inappropriate. Lucas didn't stop though, not when he could feel her caving more and more each second. She'd take him back.
"God, Peyton, my hands would be everywhere, touching and caressing every part of you I could find. My lips would work their way over your collarbone, down your chest and stomach, the inside of your thighs. I'd want to taste every part of your skin."
"Oh please don't do this," Peyton closed her eyes. Lucas brought his lips back to her ear and whispered in a very husky voice.
"And when I buried myself inside you, I'd watch your every movement. The way your lips part and your eyes flutter closed. I'd move so slow it would almost be too tortuous. When you screamed name and dug your nails into my back, I would whisper I love you over and over. And when it was all over, we'd do it again…and again." His hand creeped further and further up her back, underneath the thin layer of pink silk. She suppressed a moan. She would not cave. Not here in front of all these people. No way.
"Lucas! Quit it," she hissed in his ear. He simply smirked and pulled her closer.
"What this?" His hand went higher, now resting at the bottom edge of her bra. He boldly slipped his thumb under the edge and traced a small circle there. She was lucky it was so dark on the dance floor or she was sure everyone would have seen her shiver and part her mouth just a bit.
"What do you want from me, Luke?" she managed to breath out. He leaned close to her ear.
"Only you, Peyt." She looked into his eyes as he pulled back and for the first time since those stolen moments of junior year she saw a fire beneath them and it was directed towards her. She felt her breath catch in her throat. It had been too long. Nine months. No sex. No touches. No real kisses. She needed it.
Without hesitation, she pulled Lucas off the dance floor and out into the lobby. She followed the twisting staircase all the way up to the private changing room reserved for the bride. She had snagged the key on her way out while Bevin was busy chatting up her guests. As soon as the door was shut, she pushed him down on one of the chairs and straddled his lap. She looked into his eyes as her fingers traced the outline of his face, his eyes snapping shut at the sensual movements. He was taking in everything. The way her hips grinded and shifted over his lap. The way her fingers felt like flower petals dropping gently on his cheeks and nose and forehead. The way her breath was hot against his ear.
He opened his eyes when her movements stopped. She was just looking at him and he feared she was thinking about consequences or the past. And that wasn't good. So, he pulled her head down to his and kissed her fervently. That kiss was all she needed. Her hands snuck under his shirt, her nails raking his back and chest. He hissed into her mouth causing her to giggle and pull away from his kiss. Her sudden coyness didn't deter him. As she leaned her head back mid-chuckle, he took the opportunity to attack her neck with his mouth. She shifted again on his lap, trying to get closer and he let out a groan. He could hardly contain himself now.
"What is this, Lucas?" she asked softly as he now nibbled on the sensitive spot behind her ear, the one where her jaw line ceased.
"This is our reconciliation," he murmured into her skin.
"What do you want from me?" she slid her hands over his belt and then his bulge before letting her fingers trail back up. He shuddered in anticipation.
"Right now?" he asked with a smirk.
"From us…What do you want from us?" He looked at her seriously now. All foreplay and teasing aside.
"Just give me a date," he said, "One date to prove to you that I love you." He leaned back in and kissed her neck again.
"Ok," she nodded. He worked his way down her collarbone.
"So where were we?" he said. Peyton sighed and pulled herself away from him. She got off his lap and straightened her dress. Lucas looked at her in shock.
"I was leaving," she said. She went to the mirror and looked herself over.
"What? Why? I thought you just said-" Lucas spluttered.
"If you thought I was just going to let you back in, Lucas, you thought wrong. You have to suffer somehow and I'm sure this is one way."
"Peyt-" Lucas pleaded.
"Maybe after our date next Friday you'll get lucky, and you can prove just how much you love me" she smirked as she turned and left the bathroom. Lucas headed for one of the stalls to finish what Peyton had started. She had left him high and dry. She was a cruel tease. But she was his cruel tease. And he loved the fact he could still say that.
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The ride home wasn't as awkward as it could have been. They talked about old music and TV shows and times spent on the beach during that summer Brooke didn't exist. When friendship was enough for them both. When he watched her walk up to her door, Lucas still wished that he could just be with her. That he could go to sleep with her in his arms. It wasn't just about sex. It was about everything she made him feel. The things that had died when Brooke left. The things that didn't even resurface when he saw Brooke again. The fire had been lit by Peyton.
"Pick you up at seven then?" Lucas yelled out his window.
"Sure thing. Goodnight, Lucas."
"Goodnight, love." Lucas took off.
Peyton tiptoed inside. It was late and she didn't want to wake the baby. She slipped out of her shoes and threw her purse on the couch. A "oomph" echoed through the room. Peyton jumped back a little startled. Peeking over the top of the couch, she spotted Jake pulling himself up from sleeping position.
"Hey Peyton," he said as he stood to face her and stretched, "How was it?"
"Great." Peyton nodded.
"Good. The kids are in bed and J.J. won't need a bottle for another two hours." Peyton began to head to her bedroom and Jake followed.
"Hey, why were you on the couch?" she asked turning back around causing him almost to run into her.
"I was…" he seemed distracted by something over her shoulder. She turned to see what it was, but there was nothing there. She turned back and found him staring at her. "I was waiting up for you. To make sure you were ok."
"I'm fine."
"And things with Lucas?"
"We're good." It was like pulling teeth suddenly to get any information out of her. This was the girl who had always been so open and honest with him before. They were silent as they entered the bedroom. Jake got into bed while Peyton went to shower. All the while, he thought of the red mark on her neck. Lucas had already reclaimed her. He was loosing her to Lucas.
Who really had the upper hand? Was it Lucas? Was it Jake? Or was it Peyton? Or maybe just maybe…they were all tied up.
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Ok, so review…oh and if you think Leyton's rushed, don't worry…not all blue skies ahead…I promise…I'm thinking five or so chapters left…it depends.
