Bad Timing
Note: This chapter will be from Rory's POV. Also, I noticed in the last chapter I wrote, I spelled Logan's last name wrong a couple of times, I'm sorry.
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It's been two days… two days without word from Tristan and I can't seem to form coherent sentences or process a thought that doesn't involve him.
I've been sending him texts since the night he dropped me off; just a peep at my phone and someone might label me a stalker. Lets not get started on the 20 phone calls I've made to his office and his cell, and forget about the emails. I even went as far as calling my phone company and asking them if I somehow, accidently blocked calls from Tristan's number. I'm starting to worry…okay, I'm past worrying and damn near ready to call out the police force to search for a missing person.
Logan keeps asking me what's wrong, and honestly, I'm surprised he even notices. My lame attempt at an excuse is that I don't feel well, but then maybe it's not an excuse after all. I don't feel well: my anxiety is through the ceiling and my mind (although normally a bit out of wack from time to time) is in overdrive. I keep fighting all of the negative thoughts that are racing through my head. I know he's not dead, (thank Goodness), and I'm sure his secretary would tell me if he was hospitalized. It's this gut wrenching negative thought that tells me he just doesn't want to talk to me. Was being my friend too much? Did he expect more from me?
I shake my head as I fight contemplating this, but my ever-racing mind wins out. Did he think I would be just an easy lay?
I shudder at the thought and shake my head. No, I refuse to believe that the growing relationship we were forming was really a conquest to get in my pants on his end. It was real. It had to be.
All these questions and insane thoughts brought me back to wondering why it matters so much to me. I sigh in frustration, and hit #1 on my speed dial.
'Lo Munchkin?' my mother answers, sounding elated at receiving a call from me.
'I am in a mess mom,' I squeal dramatically.
She gasps, 'what kind of mess?'
'A huge, sloppy, smelly garbage men at 5 a.m kind of mess'
'NO!' she pauses, 'do you have a yeast infection?'
'MOM!'
We both laugh, 'sorry kiddo, what's wrong?'
'Tristan hasn't been returning any of my calls.'
'That's it?' my mom almost yells into the phone, 'you almost gave me a heart attack referencing garbage men and all'
'I'm sorry, it's just…' I pause, shame washes over me, but I need to tell someone before I have a breakdown. There is no one else I could tell my deep and darkest secrets to, so after some hesitation I continue, 'I can't eat, I can't sleep and I don't know what is wrong with me.'
My mother's silence, which rarely happens by the way, gnaws at me. When she finally speaks it is in the softest tone she can muster, 'you love him.'
'What? That's crazy! You are talking crazy! Maybe what I said confused you or something, because I don't know why you would just state that I love him…not even question, you made a blatant statement. You have to be joking. There's no way that I love Tristan! Don't you remember meeting him? He's so-'
'Rory, you are babbling', my mom cuts me off with a more stern voice, 'take a breather kiddo.'
I swallow, close my eyes and do as she asks. I do not love Tristan Dugrey. I have a husband, who I LOVE. Yes, I love my husband. A sudden wave of sadness hits me and I release a heavy sigh.
'I love Logan, Mom,' I stress Logan's name. 'Tristan was the first friend, beside you,' I add before SHE does, 'that I had in a long time. That is all-'
I've never wanted a cigarette more in my life then after that sentence just left my mouth.
'Okay baby,' she replies, and doesn't say anymore.
'Okay,' I repeat and we leave it at that, moving on to talks of Luke and his complaints of being a house hold slave.
Long after our phone call ends I'm left trying to collect my thoughts, but more importantly trying to sort out my feelings. Memories overcome me of the times that I've shared with Tristan, and for some reason tears well up in my eyes. I had to be a complete idiot in denial or just cold hearted not to see it sooner. Tristan cares for me, and not in the 'I care for my friend' type of way. And I, a married woman, am being unfair to him…
My heart stings, and tears roll down my flushed cheeks uncontrollably at the thought of causing him any pain. I am a fool.
I am not just being unfair to him…I am being unfair to myself.
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As night falls around me I decide to wallow in my thoughts with an old fashion movie, sweat pants and a pint of rocky road ice cream. Logan is off on a business trip until the morning, and oddly enough I feel relief at being alone.
To my horror two soft knocks at my door ruin my self-pity party. I roll off the couch, groaning and silently cursing Logan for sending Avery out at this time at night to check on me.
"Avery, I swear if you-" I open the door and let a gasp fall from my lips.
"Hello Mare…"
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