Mass Effect (c) Bioware

Time was running short. Last minute plans were fixed and more people found themselves on the Normandy preparing, such as Kaidan's mother. His mother was a dark-haired woman with hair that reached her shoulders. Her eyes were his eye color. She was very cordial and easy to get along with. Mrs. Alenko got along well with Shepard (who showed her Kaidan's baby book as sweet revenge,) and hit it off with Shepard's mother. The two mothers quickly became good friends.

The night before the wedding, Kaidan and Jane were forbidden from seeing each other once they went to bed. Kaidan almost went with her, but was dragged down to the crew deck by his mom. Glyph held vigil in the elevator to make sure neither the bride nor groom would try to seek out the other in the middle of the night. Although nerves made it difficult, eventually everyone fell asleep. The ship had already docked on Demeter, and the next day was dawning.

Around seven in the morning, someone nudged and woke up Kaidan. The man groaned. "Come on, just five more minutes..." There was a pause, and then Kaidan got the shock of ice cold water being dumped over his head. He gasped and shot up in his bed, narrowly missing banging his head on the bucket Javik was holding over him. The groomsmen around him snickered.

"Are you awake now?" The prothean asked irritably. "The women want us off the ship in an hour."

"Off the ship? What? Why?" Kaidan shivered and shook his head in a weak effort to become dry.

"We got visitors this morning," Garrus clarified, "Aside from the bridesmaids? Shepard's mom, your mom, Chakwas, EDI, Gabi, and Samantha, we've also now got Samara, Bakara, and Kelly onboard."

"Why do we have that?"

"Something about a surprise for Lola." James said with a shrug. They ate their breakfast, took showers, and got dressed. Kaidan was the second one done, second to Javik. The prothean had just put on a black version of his armor and tied a bow tie around his neck and declared himself ready. As soon as the groom was ready, his mother set to work on fiddling with his tie and nitpicking.

"Oh, Honey, your tie is asymmetrical...look at all this lint on you! Let me just use the lint roller...did you comb your hair?" Kaidan blushed as much of the crew watched in amusement.

"Ma..." Kaidan whined. His mother scoffed.

"Kaidan, dear, you're getting married today. To add to it, you're getting married to the most famous woman in the galaxy. God forbid I let you go out there looking imperfect!" She knelt down and used the lint roller over his pant legs. He blushed even more.

"I can do it, Ma-"

"Like hell you can. I'm not letting you half-ass this. I love you to pieces, but your biotic static electricity is attracting all this lint and I need to tend to it myself." she said. Joker was having a very difficult time trying not to laugh at the spectacle. His smirk was wiped off his face, however, when his wife approached.

"Hey, EDI." he greeted. She scanned his for a moment and frowned.

"Your tie is ten percent out of symmetry. Hold still." The AI began to fiddle with his tie. Joker frowned as well.

"Sweetheart, I'm fine. No one is going to notice."

"I noticed." EDI retorted. She then turned to Mrs. Alenko when she was done fixing the tie. "Do you have any extra lint rollers?"

"I don't, but I'm almost done with Kaidan for now..." She finished the lint rolling and tossed the roller to EDI. "Use it as much as you want on your hubby." Like Shepard's mother, Kaidan's mother had not cared that much about EDI's presence on the Normandy. Apparently having a biotic child was enough to make her fairly immune to most shock.

"So we're done then?" Kaidan asked hopefully. His mother pulled a comb from her pocket.

"No, Kaidan. I've got to comb that hair of yours."

"Ma..."

"Shh. I'm doing it because I love you." She began running the comb through her son's hair. Kaidan grimaced.

"Ma, I can do it my-" She glared at him, and Kaidan silenced, intimidated by her glare. Cortez, Garrus, and James snickered. Javik found the whole situation rather boring, as could be told by his blank stare off towards an empty wall. Soon all the gentlemen were ready. EDI was done grooming her husband and Kaidan's mother was done grooming her son for the time.

They were then promptly told to get off the ship. Glyph approached. "There is a tent outside for you to wait in a short distance away from where the ceremony will be held. Follow me."


The men were led to a tent on a cement ground just near the where the ceremony was to be, as told. On the way they saw many people getting ready. They were going to the reception area to set up tables and flowers, to the aisle to adorn a white gazebo with flowers under which the couple was to be wed. Chairs were being placed, and lots of them with the many guests. Reporters murmured among themselves, and ships were landing with guests. Caterers were hustling and bustling in and out of a kitchen in the building where the reception was to be. Even in all of this, the entire place seemed to be covered in a thin morning dew, which was ignored by almost everyone. They were far too busy to notice.

Kaidan was watching much of it through the flap in the tent, overcome by silence. Cortez finally approached him and prodded him to get his attention. He sighed. "I know how you're feeling, Kaidan. It's a lot to take in. I remember the feeling when I got married to my late husband. But it's worth it."

"Thanks, Cortez."

"Not a problem."

"I suppose now would be a bad time to ask if you're planning anything for the future?" Garrus asked, the turian awkwardly fiddling with his suit while talking. Kaidan smiled a little.

"Yeah. Move into that apartment. One day even have kids if we're lucky. Jane said herself she wouldn't mind having kids one day."

"Hah! That's an interesting image. Little biotic Shepard-Alenko kids." James interjected. Kaidan raised an eyebrow.

"What makes you so sure they'll be biotic?"

"Well...you're a biotic. Lola's a biotic. Both of you have probably spent considerable amounts of time around eezo." James responded. The sentinel rolled his eyes.

"Just because Shepard and I are biotic doesn't mean a thing. That hasn't been proven yet that it increases the chances of having biotic children."

"Yeah, but even if that doesn't affect it, again, you guys are around element zero all the time." Garrus responded. Kaidan shrugged.

"Why are we talking about this now, anyways?"

"I did kind of ask." Garrus groaned. "You think the women would allow me to go back onboard and ask for my sniper rifle? I could do some target practice while I'm waiting..."

"Nope." Cortez replied. The turian again let out an exasperated sigh. Javik had been quiet the whole time. The groom looked over to him.

"Javik, you've been quiet. You okay?"

"I suppose I am in an adequate mood for now. I was just remembering what the Prothean equivalent for marriage, as you primitives call it, was like."

"Oh?"

"Yes. We did have periods of courtship, but we did not specifically get married as humans do. There usually was no ceremony at all. The periods of courtship lasted at least five years, and then if both in the pair consented, they signed a legal document combining their property and relations. If a pair was heterosexual and viable, they were expected to breed for the empire. Homosexual, sterile, and other legal pairs such as two different species together were not frowned upon at all, but were expected to adopt orphans. Often people mated solely for the sake of breeding to keep up the population of the empire. It was considered a patriotic duty to house or give birth to children."

"So very...family oriented?" Cortez struggled for words, raising an eyebrow. Javik shook his head.

"I did not expect primitives to understand. It was to keep up army size. It was never about family. Whenever a citizen of the empire grew to the age of adulthood of his or her respective species and was physically able, they were expected to serve for a time."

"So what happened if a partner in a relationship cheated on their significant other?" Cortez asked curiously.

"It almost never happened. It was seen as a form of treason in the empire. We did not kill them. Instead, if one cheated, their genitals were blown off with a high precision laser."

All the men simultaneously winced. "Harsh." Cortez responded.

"But extremely effective."

"But damn, harsh."

"All this talk reminds me of something I need to say." Garrus interrupted. He cleared his throat, stood up, and approached Kaidan. He came face to face with him. "Alenko, I'm glad it's you marrying Shepard and not some moron. But if you ever hurt Shepard, I will snipe your head and then mount it to the CIC. We clear?"

Kaidan nodded firmly. "I will never do such a thing. I couldn't live without her."

The turian smiled again, though it was hard to tell. "Then we see eye-to-eye."