There's just one thing that I want to know,
Why would god want to hurt me so bad?
Does he know how much it hurts?
Missing you – First Lady
The ringing of my cell phone hurt my ears, my head and every other part of my body. I was sore from falling but I could manage, I was home now, more comfortable.
I leaned over to one side of my bed and picked up my cell phone, the flashes on the cover stung my eyes, too bright, too bright. I answered.
"You know who ever the fuck it is I'm going to fucking kill you"
"Kathryn?"
I knew that voice from anywhere, the slightly girly tone it held but at the same time, the boy in him coming out. The softness, the cheeriness, yes there could be only one person on the other end and his name was Blaine Tuttle.
"What do you want Blaine!"
"Is that really you?"
"Yes it fucking is, now what the fuck do you want!"
"Sebastian told me you were in hospital…he said you have your memory back"
"Yeah I do, now can I get back to sleeping"
"Actually I was wondering if I could come over, I have a feeling you're going to like what I have to give you"
Cocaine, please be cocaine. I needed it, my head would stop aching, and my body would stop aching.
"Sure"
I hung up and slowly got out of bed, the house was almost silent, although I could hear soft sounds coming from across the hall, my best guess was Sebastian was fucking Isabelle. Great.
My right arm hung loosely by my side, the skin covered in a plaster cast. It was broken, severely, stupid cast, it was heavy and made my outfits look bad.
I pulled on some clothes, fixed my hair and make-up, it was a sunny day outside, unfortunately the sun hurt my eyes. Fucking sun, if I could I would blow it up right now.
There were small stitches close to my knee where I had cut it open, they looked ugly, probably hideous. I slipped into some heels and started walking over to my cupboard for a jacket to put on, I miss stepped and trip, crashing into my dresser, hitting my knee.
"Fuck!" I cried out.
I picked up the closest thing I could reach before crashing to the ground; it was a bottle of really expensive perfume I had bought from Paris a few years back. It smashed against the wall and made a loud smashing sound as I threw it hard at the wall.
Suddenly the soft sounds I had heard from across the room had stopped. I heard steps, a door open, a door close and then the turning of my door. I whipped my head around. I dare him to enter, watch what I throw at him this time.
"Kathryn are you okay?"
A shoe came in my reach and I threw it at him, it missed his head by just a little bit, damn it. It may have done some real damage.
"Fuck off Sebastian before I do hit you!"
"You're bleeding"
My knee, it was bleeding, just slowly crimson liquid seeped through the stitching, he rushed to my bathroom and grabbed a face washer then came back to me, placing it over my knee to stop the blood from getting on my floor.
"There" He said as if I cared.
"Screw you"
"I'm only trying to help"
"Did you ever think I didn't want your help Sebastian!? Did you ever think that you've helped enough!? Letting your girlfriend push me down a flight of stairs isn't enough?"
"Kathryn I didn't let her she jus…"
"Leave now"
He did as I said. Soon after Blaine came in, I was still seated on the floor, I couldn't move, it hurt too much and beside that I wasn't sure if the bleeding had stopped yet, I didn't want it to bleed more.
"What the hell are you doing?" He asked me.
I looked up at him with my bruises and cuts.
"Oh fucking Christ" He said at my face.
"Just help me up Tuttle"
Blaine grabbed my hand and pulled me up; I hopped over to my bed and sat down, taking the face washer off. It had stopped bleeding now.
"What do you have for me? Cocaine?" I smirked.
"Yeah like I'd do that again"
"What?"
"Last time I tried to give you coke, Mr Valmont had a hissy fit"
"Whatever just give me it"
Blaine pulled out a yellow sealed envelope from his jacket and smiled at me, he passed it to me and I was only too eager to open it. I emptied its contents onto my bed, spreading them out so I could see what they were.
"Interesting" I smiled as I looked over it all.
Photographs of Annette at some club, dancing around a pole, one of her holding a baby…a boy and her…Sebastian and her…Isabelle and her?
That's the one I picked up, the one of her and Isabelle. I studied it, thinking maybe it wasn't Isabelle, but it was. I knew it, I could tell. Isabelle was kissing Annette, it looked more than friendly.
"What the fuck?" I laughed.
"Read the papers"
I picked up one of the sheets, it was full of information, I scanned over it. Annette Hargrove…Kansas City, Kansas…Trevor…Sebastian Valmont…Oh juicy.
"Hargrove and Silas wedding" I spoke, smiling to both Blaine and myself.
I read the article from the Kansas City news paper.
"Daughters of Hargrove and Silas caught in a steamy situation" I read the headline. "Annette Hargrove, daughter of Dean Hargrove and Isabelle Silas, daughter of Maria Silas found at a Kansas City nightclub being more then step-sisters. The pair were caught making out and then later went off with another female into a private room. Photos were released to the press early yesterday morning of the threesome, but the photos were to explicit to show. Rumours are escalating that you can see a pornographic film of the Hargrove-Silas siblings on the internet; one is yet to be found. The young Annette Hargrove is also a mother of a young child whom no one knows the father of. Annette was featured in Seventeen magazine quite awhile ago in an article about how she planned to wait to lose her virginity. Well was it all lie?"
I burst out in laughter. Fucking Christ, she had turned out to be a little different than I had thought. But why had Blaine given it to me, it was useless, it probably happened a year ago. I checked the date, it was the day before yesterday's paper.
"Aren't Isabelle and Sebastian together?"
"Yeah that's what I thought too princess, seems Miss Silas is more then we thought"
"Hmm so why give this to me?"
"Because I know you're planning revenge on not only Annette but Sebastian too, and I thought hey why not throw Isabelle in there, after all she did push you down a flight of stairs"
"You know me too well Blaine"
"Where are you going?" Sebastian asked, popping his head around the corner.
"My doctor's appointment if you don't mind"
"Let me drive you"
"No"
"Why not Kathryn?"
"Because I hate you"
I limped the rest of the way to the door and opened it. He rushed down to me and stopped me, slamming the door before I could get out of it and escape.
"I'm coming whether you like it or not"
"No you're not"
"Yeah, I am"
I couldn't hold it anymore, I had to yell and scream at him. Make him feel like shit, make him hurt like I did. I needed to scream something oblivious at him, something he wouldn't understand.
"Go fuck your lesbian girlfriend!"
Quickly I stepped out the door, half running to the limousine before he could catch me. I got inside and ordered the driver to drive, but before he could Sebastian got in with me.
"Excuse me?" He said.
Too late now, we were off.
"You heard me Sebastian"
"She's not a lesbian clearly because she's with me"
"Suit yourself"
"What do you know?" He asked me, staring at me, trying to read me.
Oh baby I was beyond reading.
"I pulled out the photographs from my bag and threw them at him. They were the most explicit ones I could find. I had found a few on the internet and the others I got from Blaine.
He flicked through them, he stopped on one. One of the ones I had gotten from the internet. Isabelle was licking Annette out, while Annette was fingering some other girl. Raunchy.
"Seems your virgin ex turned out to be a horny, lesbian, slut and your now girlfriend Isabelle, well I always knew she was a whore"
"Fuck you Kathryn"
"Oh baby no way in hell will I ever…" I climbed on his lap and licked his jaw. "Ever, ever fuck you" Then I climbed off. The limousine stopped and I got out.
Lllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
I got home late, it was past 1am, and after my doctor's appointment I rang Blaine to pick me up. I had pretty much been at his house planning my revenge the whole day.
"Why didn't you fucking tell me Isabelle!?" Sebastian yelled, I could hear him from downstairs.
"I'm not a lesbian Sebastian! I love you!"
"Then what are these huh!? Explain them Isabelle! Because I've sure fucking run out of explanations in my head!"
I climbed the steps slowly, listening to their argument; it sure was nice to hear it. I hated the bitch anyway.
Crying, she was fucking crying. Was she pathetic?
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" She screamed at him.
Thud. What the hell was that?
"Oh fuck Isabelle I'm sorry, I didn't…oh god" I heard him from the hall.
The door was open and I peered in. Isabelle was on the floor with a very nice red mark on her face. Had he hit her? I walked in there to find out.
"What the fuck is going on?" I asked, faking it.
Isabelle looked up at me, tears streaking her otherwise perfect face.
"Sebastian…did you…did you hit her?" I seemed appalled, frankly I wasn't surprised.
"No…I mean yes…I didn't mean it"
She got up, I helped her, pulling her to her feet and giving Sebastian a dirty look.
"Fuck you Sebastian, you don't hit women! Come on Isabelle" I took her away into my room and locked the door.
I'm going to become her friend, then screw her over.
Poised. Perfect. Elegant. Intelligent. Bitch. Vain. Heartless. There's probably a lot more I could think of, but those few come to mind right now. It's now early morning and I haven't gone to sleep.
I stayed up all morning with Isabelle, listening to her, watching her cry, hearing her whine, eventually I had kicked her out, told her I needed to sleep but if she needed anything to call me. She did, I had just layed down and she rang me.
It was then I couldn't get back to sleep, I sat up all morning thinking about what I'm about to go through with. I'm ready to ruin 2 lives and seriously fuck one person over, mostly because I enjoy it, but some part of it was because they had hurt me.
Sebastian; he deserved it more than anyone, he broke me. Now he can't fix me.
Isabelle; took my Sebastian when I needed him.
Annette; took him, had him, turned him against me, she screwed me up, she put me into rehab, she fucked my life up. I hated her, but at the same time I envied her. Did Sebastian ever love me as much as he loved her? Does he still love me? Did he ever? Those questions were ones I wanted answers to since the day I knew he loved her.
I'm going to break him, I'm going to make him hurt so bad he'll want to die; I'm going to kill him on the inside. Make his heart die, I don't want him trusting anyone again, I don't want him falling in love again. He's going to pay; he's going to pay more than anyone else.
Manipulation; the key to what I will bring down.
I love him, I hate him, I want him and at some point in time I needed him. Not anymore, I don't need anyone. I'm officially cold.
Knocks on my door disturbed my thoughts. "Come in"
Black hair, blue eyes, tanned body, wavy hair, tall. Dakota.
My knight in shining armour has arrived.
"Dakota?"
"Sweet Kathryn"
I don't do affection, or in most cases I don't do affection. Dakota was different. He was there when Sebastian wasn't; he was there to hold me at night when Sebastian hated me. He's always there.
"What happened to you?" He asked me, noticing my cast.
"Sebastian's girlfriend pushed me down the stairs"
He kissed my forehead, his lips were warm on my skin, it sent tingles throughout my frail body.
"I missed you" I whispered.
"I know"
Take me away Dakota.
"Can we...? Just for tonight"
He didn't answer, but slowly undressed me, with more care than anyone had.
Kiss.
Bite.
Lick.
I'm away. Fly Kathryn.
I knew when I woke Dakota wouldn't be sleeping next to me, he wouldn't even be laying there watching me. I knew he would have gone, he would have left for a room down the hall.
What I didn't expect was Sebastian sitting on one of the chairs watching me as I slept.
"Good morning sis" He said cheerily, stroking my head as he approached me.
"Get the fuck away from me" I retorted.
"Don't be so bitter"
"Screw you"
"Where's Isabelle?"
I rolled over, who cares.
"Kathryn?"
"I don't fucking know Sebastian god just fuck off!" I closed my eyes, hopefully he would go away.
"Well then I'm going to Kansas for the weekend, I need to speak to Annette"
Annette? I'm coming Sebastian.
I jumped up from my bed. "Wait, let me shower and get dressed, I'm coming with you"
"So now you talk to me"
I pulled down my night gown right in front of him. I wasn't wearing panties, nor a bra, his reaction, well you can imagine.
"Wait for me?" I pleaded.
I'm pretty sure it took all of his self control to say no to me, but he did it. He said no.
"Please" I got to my knees and looked up at him.
His hands stroked my hair, my face.
"Fine"
"Good" I got up and showered.
"Kansas City, fucking Kansas, it's so…ew"
"Geez Kat"
"Shut up and just drive Valmont"
He didn't drive for long before he pulled up at a large house. It was quite a nice looking house, pretty tiny compared to mine of course, but I suppose it was alright.
One knock, two knock, three knock…wait…wait.
"Sebastian?" Annette answered the door.
"Hey"
"What the hell are you doing here?"
"Where's Isabelle?"
"She's not here…I mean who's Isabelle"
I stepped out from behind Sebastian with a pleasant grin on my face.
"You don't need to hide it Annette, Sebastian knows you're fucking Isabelle, he knows your dirty little secrets"
"Excuse me?"
"I bet daddy doesn't know"
"Kathryn shut up" Sebastian silenced me.
Hesitantly Annette invited us in to her home, her father and step-mother were home.
"Daddy you remember Sebastian Valmont and Kathryn Merteuil right?"
"Of course sweetheart, it's nice to see you both again" He said, looking straight at me.
My plan was taking its course; I'll go through her by attacking Mr Hargrove.
"Maria, these are some old friends from New York, Sebastian Valmont and Kathryn Merteuil"
"Yes dear, I know Sebastian, my daughter is dating him, where is Isabelle anyway?"
For awhile Annette and her family chatted with us, talking about their church and everything else boring people do. Then Mr Hargrove had to go fax something, he left down the hall.
"Excuse me Annette, but can I use the toilet?" I asked.
"Down the hall, 5th door on the left"
I got up, excused myself and turned the corner to the hall. It was quite long and many rooms occupied it. Most of the doors were shut except one. Mr Hargrove's office.
"Mr Hargrove" I said, smiling sweetly.
"Kathryn, you scared me, please call me Dean now"
"What are you doing Dean?" I asked him, inviting myself inside the room.
"Just faxing some papers"
I leaned in closer, sitting on his desk and crossing my legs, my skirt rose, high enough to see right up it. He looked, everyone always did, he started to sweat, I think he was uncomfortable.
"Kathryn I think we should go back out there"
"Before we do can I ask you something Dean?"
"Sure go ahead"
I pulled him closer and un crossed my legs, he stood in between them, I looked him straight in the eye.
"I'm having some trouble"
He licked his lips; I ran my hands down my self.
"W…w…what would the t…trouble be?"
"I have this party I have to go to and well I'm wearing a dress and well I don't know if it's a little revealing or not"
"I'm not sure if I can help you there"
"Well it looks like this"
He watched me as I slowly unbuttoned the few buttons on my shirt, my breasts popped out a bit more.
"I…I…"
"You what Mr Hargrove?" I licked his neck.
That was it for him; he pushed me down on his desk and ripped my panties off. He was quite rough for an older man.
"Mmmm" I said as he began to rub me.
"Shh" he said silencing me.
His hand covered my mouth as he penetrated me, it was to stop me screaming and moaning I suppose. Then he let go, he held my waist so tight I think I was going to bruise.
"Ouch" I cried out.
It really hurt, and I wasn't faking it.
Then I heard footsteps, brilliant.
I started to cry, but he didn't stop. He held me tighter and tighter, I think that if he had of held anymore tighter I would have snapped. Tears ran down my face. I saw someone stand at the door and obviously he didn't.
I started to cry even more, telling him to stop, screaming and crying. It looked like rape.
"Daddy?" Annette said.
Sebastian and Maria appeared at the door then and Dean stopped suddenly. Sebastian saw me crying and saw the pain and ran to Dean and punched him.
"Get your dirty fucking hands off her!"
He grabbed me and held me, I cried into him.
"I didn't…she told me too"
I didn't say a word; I think my plan had worked.
Annette ran off crying and Maria had gone after her, I'm pretty sure I had ruined her family. Good, she ruined mine.
Sebastian took me out to the car and gave me his jacket. I had to play the rape victim all the way home now. I cuddled up against the door, looking all sad and perverted now.
"Kathryn I'm sorry"
No words.
"Did he hurt you?"
I pulled open the jacket slowly and pulled up my shirt, two blue bruises were on my hips, clearly shown.
"Fuck"
He pulled over, I sat up. What the fuck? Why were we stopping?
Sebastian put his hands on my hips and gently rubbed around the bruises. Don't do that you silly boy. I closed my eyes, I tried to think of someone disgusting to replace his head so I could keep control, but I couldn't, no one came to mind.
It was dark now, and probably getting closer to dinner time. Sebastian leant down and kissed the bruises softly. I had to bite my own lip to keep from groaning. Keep control Kathryn. Stay in control.
He picked up his head and brought it to mine, kissing the side of my mouth and then my lips.
I tried to fight it, but he was too strong and eventually I had to succumb to the kiss. His tongue massaged mine as it swirled inside my mouth. He tasted so good.
Stop Kathryn, don't let him win.
Before he could do anything more to me I stopped him. Pulling away and regaining my stature.
"Drive" I ordered.
A/N: Annette gone, two to go.
