Hey you guys, sorry it took me sooooo long to update that chapter, but I had so much to do with work and school so there wasn't much time. I hope you'll understand and hopefully you like the new chapter. Enjoy and thanks for the nice reviews.

If you forget me

I want you to know

one thing.

You know how this is:

if I look

at the crystal moon, at the red branch

of the slow autumn at my window,

if I touch

near the fire

the impalpable ash

or the wrinkled body of the log,

everything carries me to you,

as if everything that exists,

aromas, light, metals,

were little boats

that sail

toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,

if little by little you stop loving me

I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly

you forget me

do not look for me,

for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,

the wind of banners

that passes through my life,

and you decide

to leave me at the shore

of the heart where I have roots,

remember

that on that day,

at that hour,

I shall lift my arms

and my roots will set off

to seek another land.

But

if each day,

each hour,

you feel that you are destined for me

with implacable sweetness,

if each day a flower

climbs up to your lips to seek me,

ah my love, ah my own,

in me all that fire is repeated,

in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,

my love feeds on your love, beloved,

and as long as you live it will be in your arms

without leaving mine.

________________________________________________________________________

Everything around her went quiet and darkness surrounded her. There was nothing but emptiness and only the quiet whispering of familiar voices, telling her stories of a lifetime. A lifetime she knew so well but forgot about, drowning the sound of a male voice that was calling her name from far far away. Every now and then blurry pictures passed her eyes like in an old movie. Some in slow motion, others barely noticeable by the pace they passed.

"You could really have been a lil' bit nicer to her, she's been out for 20 minutes now. Do ya always have to manhandle her?" Sawyer asked Kate a little aggressive looking down to Juliet that lay on the ground, himself kneeling over her brushing a few strands of hair out of her face, that had fallen out of her loose bun.

Kate gazed to the ground. "I...I´m sorry. "

"She told me 'bout the shoulder thing, ya know." Sawyer added and Kate didn't even dare to look him in the eyes, she still felt guilty for that day in the jungle. "I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay, Freckles." He broke her off and Kate gazed at Sawyer that lovingly stroked Juliet's cheek and then kissed her temple. A hint of jealousy got up within her. She didn't know if it was Sawyer or if she just liked the idea of being in a relationship like Sawyer and Juliet had. Had?

Jack never noticed Kate glancing over to him right that moment, he only had eyes for the jungle. Watching it anxiously.

Juliet then stirred and let out a sigh. "Mhm...James!" she mumbled and Sawyer immediately squeezed her hand softly to let her know that he was there, he was by her side. "You hear me, Juliet?" he asked and she squinted a few times, the daylight burning in her eyes.

She backed away slightly as she saw those familiar eyes glancing down at her. "James!" Juliet sat up and then looked right into Kate's green eyes. "You. It was you right?" she then asked more rhetorically and Kate gave her a compassionate stare. "Sorry, Juliet." There was something about that woman, Kate. Anger rose inside of the blonde doctor, she just didn't know why, but when she looked back at Sawyer she could tell there was a damn good reason for her to be angry. What ever it was, she knew there was a connection between them and suddenly sadness overcame her. A deep sadness she had never felt before. Or at least she forgot about.

"I changed my mind when I saw you look at her."

Juliet's head was aching, whether it came from memories coming back or the wound she could sense on the back of her head she didn't care cause everything around her began spinning and the next second she puked into a near by bush while Sawyer held up her long blond hair that had completely fallen out of it's bun, in an instant. Juliet coughed a few times wiping her mouth with her arm. Kate made a disgusted face and even Jack had been woken up from his day dream.

"You okay, Sunshine?" Sawyer asked worriedly getting nothing but that blank stare. "Why did you bring me here?" No Answer.

"I should better check on this, maybe you got a slight concussion." Jack kneeled down to her checking on her eyes. She had a glassy gaze and she looked very pale and weak, but when he touched her she slapped his hand away. "Don't. Don't. Don't touch me." Juliet almost squealed as she felt his big warm surgeon hands on her forehead. Sure it was a good feeling, but at the moment she trusted nobody of them. Not even him. "I just wanna help you, Juliet." Jack assured her and Juliet frowned. "Yeah? Like you wanted to help me as you held that broken piece of plate against my throat? "She hissed. Everybody was looking confused at Jack now.

"You did WHAT?" Sawyer clenched his fists and wanted to punch the soul out of that Jackass, but Kate held him back by pulling him close to her, pressing him tightly against her side, squeezing even harder when he tried to fight against it.

"I...I didn't do that, Juliet. At least not this time. You only remember me doing it, cause I did once. And that's been a looong time ago."

"What are you talking about, Jack?" Juliet asked confused, she remembered him almost trying to kill her like it had happened just yesterday.

"Ya know I should've killed ya back in the 70's. You deserve it. First you're using her for your own good, just to make Kate jealous and you knew she had feelings for you. You broke her heart. You promised her to get her off the island but ya never came back for her, then you destroyed our life we had and now I hear you sittin on this!? Son of a bitch. Ya just a heartless asshole, nothin' more. An' you're called a leader, a hero, a fuckin' life-saver but in my eyes ya nothin' but a pathetic little piece of shit." Sawyer growled out.

Juliet didn't understand a word of what they were fighting about right now but she felt the sudden urge to gaze to the ground as Jack glanced over to her.

"I apologised." Jack whispered. He wasn't aware of the fact that Juliet used to love him that much. Or maybe she just loved the idea of him. Him the leader, the hero the kind of man all looked up to, but he himself knew now that all of it was just a big fat lie. He was nothing of it. He had changed a lot and so did everyone else. Now Sawyer had grown to be the leader type, getting all under control, having an intelligent, wonderful woman at his side that had his back. Jack began to hate himself. What did he do wrong to deserve all this? Seemed like his time to shine was over.

"No, you did not. You left me, but I don't care anymore." Juliet mumbled to herself, getting all the attention. Where did that come from right now?

"Huh? What did ya just say?" Sawyer asked getting closer to her. Juliet wasn't so sure it was her talking the other second so she shook her head in confusion. "Never mind. So would please somebody tell me what's going on now?"

"No can do, Sunshine." Sawyer said with a smirk

"Why not?"

"Cause we need ya first to find Alex for us. She's got a boat somewhere."

"For what need?"

"To leave that part of the island and get back to the other one." Kate explained rolling her eyes up and down like she always used to.

"Why would I…." Juliet began but then Kate broke her off. "Juliet please. I just wanna go home." Kate begged the blond woman that frowned at her. Thinking.

"Please, cause if you don't help us now we will never going to get off of this hell of island. And I owe you; we owe you to get you off the island too."

Kate had a point.

There was nothing Juliet desired more than finally goin' home. And after a second Juliet glanced over to Jack. "And who's gonna assure me that you wont leave me here?"

"I will. Trust me." Said the conman and Juliet almost smirked. "Yeah, can I?"

"You're not gonna regret it. Give's a shot." Sawyer smiled as Juliet raised an eyebrow up at him.

"Okay." A slight suspicion in her voice. "I'll bring you to Alex. But, I want answers!"

Sawyer nodded. "What ever ya wanna know, sweetheart." He smiled his dimples coming out slightly and Juliet melted away, although she had no idea why she found that guy so extremely attractive when he was generally known as the biggest ass ever.

___________________________________________________________________________

Juliet found Alex and they followed her to a bay where she hid a boat. They had lost so much time while getting Alex's boyfriend that it was almost impossible that nobody had seen them while they were running.

"C'mon, hurry up. Get in the boat. "Alex yelled actually concerned that they would make it back to the other island, because Pickett was already on his way. Coming for Sawyer to finally slit his throat open. They were lucky to have a little advance.

First Kate got in, then Jack and Sawyer that helped to put in Carl safely. The kid was weak and had vomited all over the way to the beach. Now Alex wanted to get in, but Juliet held her back.

"Not you Alex."

"But, Carl… ."

"I said, NO. If your father…. ."

"Then what? What is he going to do, Juliet?"

"He's gonna lock you up forever or maybe he's going to kill Carl. Do you want him to kill your boyfriend?" Alex got pretty quiet now; she looked to her shoes and then shook her head.

"I´m sorry, Alexandra."

"But you can't go either, Juliet. Because if he finds out that you…."

"I know." Sawyer looked over to them immediately. "I can't go." She mumbled to herself almost not able to be heard but Sawyer knew exactly what she'd said. He could tell by her eyes. "No, no, no. You're comin' with us." He shouted over to her, frightened she could just let him down. "What? Does she wanna stay?" Kate and Jack asked simultaneously. Sawyer hopped out of the boat. "I can't just go. … Rachel." Then Juliet paused never intending to get that name over her lips. "James…." she stopped again freezing as a shot fell and than there was a splashing. Kate squealed. Everything went so fast and before they could say knife Jack had slipped into the water, floating in his own big puddle of blood. The next second Kate was in the water and screamed, crying now desperately when she helped herself to get Jack back into the boat. Sawyer just watched sheer shocked and Juliet shouted Jacks name, all running in slow motion now. Another shot fell but this time the other man, the attacker fell to the ground. Sawyer and Juliet turned their heads and there was Alex holding onto a gun with shaky hands. She let it fall and then she ran, disappearing into the jungle.

"JULIET! Get in the boat!" Sawyer shouted over to the baffled woman. "I...I can't." she whispered with a frown. "Juliet please … please don't leave me again. I can't leave you again." His voice drowning in the end. For a second Juliet stood completely still. "What?" She held her head.

"SAWYER, HURRY UP!" Kate yelled desperately. "I...I don't know what to do." Suddenly Sawyer grabbed Juliet by her wrist and pulled her roughly into the boat, pushing it further into the water. "I promised to bring ya back 'n' I will, Blondie."

The boat began floating slowly and the air was still filled with the ear piercing sound of Kate's screams and the gun shots, when Sawyer began paddling.

When Jack got back to reality they were all kneeling over him glancing at him with concern looks. Pickett had just caught his shoulder. Luckily Juliet had taken care of it immediately even though she wasn't a surgeon. And she had Sawyer that used to pull a bullet out of his shoulder himself. Juliet had ripped Sawyers shirt into two pieces and had used them to stop the bleeding so Jack was steady now but he had to eat something soon to get his blood sugar back on track. That's all she was thinking about. And than those pictures, memories of a previous operation got on her mind.

They were still shipping back to the other island and the sun had already begun to set. As if she sank into the water inch by inch dipping the sky into a warm orange and pink. As unique as every other sunset that had passed. But it wasn't the right time to enjoy that scenario under those circumstances even though everybody was pretty relieved to see Jack conscious. And you could almost hear Kate letting out a long breath she had forgot to take since she thought Jack was going to die.

"I´m so glad you're okay. I thought you were dead." Kate breathed stroking Jacks cheek sweetly, both of her hands on his face. Ouch. Jack winced as he moved and pushed himself into a sitting position. "Well, that's what I thought for a second either." He said with a frown, his voice barely over a whisper.

Juliet cowered at the end of the boat, hugging herself, looking back sighing and then watching the waves crashing at the boat. She felt guilty. Guilty for leaving, cause now she had betrayed Ben "the others" she had risked her sister's life. Because Ben would always take what she loved the most and didn't she love her sister most? She had killed a woman today. Okay not exactly. But that woman died and still Colleen's blood stuck to her hands.

Her white lap coat was now smeared with even Jacks blood. Oh how dirty she felt right that moment.

"You okay? " Sawyer asked after a while not longer able to watch the way Kate fawns over Jack. Like a sick lovebird, although he was one either when it came to Juliet. Right?

"Hm? Oh yeah. I guess." Juliet mumbled now glancing back at him, rubbing her arms.

"You cold?"

"A little. Can I ask you something?" she asked blinking over to Jack, locking eyes with him for a while and smiling softly when he gave her a thankful nod. Sawyer followed her gaze and raised an eyebrow before sceptically replying to her question. "Shoot!"

"You said something earlier, I´m still thinking about."

"'n what's that?"

"That you don't wanna lose me again…. ." Sawyer was silent for a moment and then sighed. "I guess it's time for fillin' you in then, huh?" Kate glanced over to them and gave them a weak smile, nodding in agreement. "Maybe she'll understand." She said softly and Sawyer both watched the confused face Juliet made, before they finally filled her in about everything…. .

So, this is it for now. Hope you liked it. I´m working on the next one already. I promise it'll include some more Suliet fluff. Remember reviews are love! :o)