This chapter steams up again, but don't worry, we're still moving at the same careful pace. This is another chapter that's been edited, but only a tiny bit.
As a usual disclaimer: I, of course, am still not lucky enough to own Castle, if you do, thanks for sharing!
Chapter 12
Kate entered her room and flopped down on the bed. The afternoon and evening had been fun. Javier, Lanie, Castle and her shared lunch and dinner in Lanie and Esposito's room, and played cards all afternoon in between meals. There were very few times in Beckett's adult life that she let herself just relax like that and have fun with friends. Kevin and Jenny, who were also still snowed in, even stopped by for a little while before returning to their love nest on the top floor of the hotel.
After dinner though, Beckett and Castle wisely took their leave when Javier's suggestion for dessert was countered with innuendo and promise from his fiance'.
Now Kate was back in her room, while Castle went down to the main desk to check on weather conditions and road openings. Having this alone time though led her mind to all sorts of possible scenarios. She surprised herself when she realized she actually hoped that they were still confined to the building. For the first time that weekend, the thought of returning to her apartment didn't hold appeal, but only seemed cold and lonely. What is wrong with me?
Maybe going home would be best though.
Or maybe they would only be able to make it back to one of their places and she could still spend more time with Castle.
Heck, maybe the roads weren't even open yet. From the window, it didn't seem like much had changed outside, but the darkness made it hard to tell. Staying put was definitely tempting, but then what?
What did he expect? Rick had been a complete gentleman so far, and said he wanted to go slow, but things were still changing fast. If their friends were expecting them to sleep together, was he expecting that as well? She had been fantasizing about this for years, but never expected it to actually happen. Now that the opportunity presented itself, should she discourage it? Should she initiate it? Should she just go with the flow and see what developed?
She knew sex with Rick Castle would be good. No, incredible! His few kisses left no doubt about that. But it would also mean a permanent change in their relationship. You just can't take that back and pretend it never happened. Would it effect their working relationship? She was sure it would have to at least in some ways, but that could be good or bad.
So far nothing had happened that couldn't be forgotten. They had such a great friendship and partnership. Becoming lovers was so much more though.
What if this all went horribly wrong? It would end every part of their relationship, lover, partners, and friends. It was a big risk, but was avoiding intimacy of every kind, without giving it a fair change, a bigger risk?
At this thought, Rick's whispered words of love from the night before, echoed in her head. Maybe it was already too late. Maybe the only choice was to move forward.
The sound of the door being opened cut off all previous thought. Rick entered causally and tossed the key card on the dresser.
"It looks like all the precipitation has stopped, but temperatures are dropping to well below zero. So far only the emergency routes have been cleared. It will be at least morning before we get out of here."
"Good!" Kate answered before realizing the word slipped from her lips.
Castle climbed onto the bed next to her. Both were on their stomachs, propped up on their elbows.
"Detective Beckett, are you excited to be holed up with this ruggedly handsome writer for another night?" He quickly gave her a peck on the lips before she could reply.
"No, well, I'm just saying it sounds like maybe tomorrow life can return to normal."
Rick's blue eyes searched Kate's green ones. "Is that what you want? Just to go back to normal daily life as it was, and leave this weekend as a memory?"
"We can't stay here forever."
"I would if that was the only way we could be 'us'."
"So you think we should start a relationship?"
"Oh, we started a relationship a long time ago, but yes I think we should continue this new level we reached last night. I'd like to see where this might go."
"It could ruin everything we already have."
"It could, or it could be so spectacular, that what we already have pales in comparison," he countered.
"What if it's not?"
"What if it is?"
Kate tore her eyes away from his and stared at her hands. Rick watched her as she ran all the possibilities through her mind, just like when she assessed options in a case. He'd always gotten a thrill out of watching her think so hard. He didn't even know why. But this time, with her so close, and with her debating what might come to pass between them, he was completely drawn to here. He had to show her how good it could be.
He turned on his side and then moved his hand to her cheek in a soft caress, then to her neck to push her long brown hair away from her creamy skin. Rick moved his lips to the place below her ear, where her jaw meets her neck, and trailed slow deliberate kisses down to her collarbone and then back to her jaw.
Kate closed her eyes and sighed as this man who so often drove her crazy, found a new and entirely pleasurable way to drive her just as mad!
His mouth found her earlobe, where he nipped and sucked the delicate skin.
She turned her body toward his and ended up on her back as she took his face in her hands and drew his mouth down upon her own. She ran her tongue along his lips and was granted entrance into his mouth. Their tongues mutually danced and probed and explored.
Castle moved his body even closer to hers and soon was almost on top of her. His left hand explored her side, while his right hand was tangled in her hair. He eventually tore his lips from hers and again traveled the length of her neck, but this time plunged even deeper as he followed the line of her v-neck top. When his chin bushed against her breast, he really wanted to push the soft material out of his way and claim her in his mouth, but instead returned to kiss her parted lips.
Her whole body grew warm and a heated tingle bubbled in her belly. Kate wrapped her arms around this wonderful man and pulled him as close as possible. She felt more than desire, she felt need. Her hands explored the muscles of his back as they dropped to his waist. She hesitated only a moment before squeezing his surprisingly firm butt.
Castle groaned and kissed her with such passion that it almost made Kate dizzy. She moved her hands again, this time under the hem of his shirt and up to his nipples where she grazed him with her finger nails.
"Kate, honey," Castle gasped and pulled back. "We have to stop now, or I'm not going to be able to stop later."
"Who said you have to stop later?"
"Lord knows I don't want to, but we can't do this yet. I want you so badly, but you're not even sure if you want a relationship with me. And as much as I want to move this forward, I don't want to ruin our friendship either. We need to slow down."
"Are you sure? Because I'm telling you... you've got a green light. No regrets."
"That's easy to say right now, while we are in the moment. But like you said, tomorrow we go back to normal. I want my new normal to include you, all the time, I do. And as much as this kills me to say, I really think we need to wait until we see if that normal works before we can make love."
"I've never seen you like this before."
"I've never felt like this before, and I do not want to hurt you or mess this up. So I am going to play it safe. Are you upset?"
"No, just surprised, I guess."
Rick sat up and pulled Kate into his arms. "Please know that I do want you. And if I didn't feel so strongly that going slow was the right thing, right now I'd be pleasuring every inch of your amazing body, and enjoying every moment of it."
"Something to look forward to I guess."
He was satisfied with her answer and continued to hold her in his arms.
