Chapter 12: Erryday I'm Creepin'
"I don't understand. I'm supposed to be the calm one, the mellow one. I'm the one who has no drama in their life. So why am I freaking out? I'm a Hufflepuff for Christ's sake I don't do this. I'm a good person. What did I do to the universe to get this load of crap?"
"Bloody Hell, Riley just shut up. I'm sick and tired of you complaining about your new found attraction to Potter. Get a fucking grip on life." Eliza snapped at me. Even after coming back from Christmas Holidays she is still not talking to Katie, and is trying to ruin Garrett and Louis's lives. Speaking of which, Katie has been sitting with Louis at meals just to rub it in Eliza's face. A bit bitchy if you ask me, but nobody ever does. Hettie and I have been going back and forth between the two of them. They are both stubborn and stupid over their argument after the Gryffindor Victory party. Can't they just realize they are sluts with issues and get over themselves?
The two of us were sitting in the library trying to do work, even though it was only the second day back. She bitched for almost an hour about how Katie was 'such a bitch' and 'a super slut' also something about the quidditch team all aiming their brooms toward her goal post. Eventually she let me get a word in and I ended up rambling and building myself into a panic about Al. I don't know what's going on in my brain. All I know is that I can't stop thinking about him. I dream about him. I stare at him in class, the kind of stare where you look long and hard, and then notice that he sees you so you look away really fast and blush horribly, yeah that kind. I haven't been able to speak a coherent sentence to him since I got to Kings Cross.
Over Christmas we wrote on a daily basis. It was wonderful. Now normally I'm not used to saying dopey shit like wonderful and beautiful and all that frilly vocabulary, but he just brings it out in me. Damn him. I can't help myself, I feel like I'm going crazy. I even told him about my mum, I haven't told anyone else. He's been great about it. He doesn't exactly give me hope, because I know there isn't any, but something about him makes me feel better about it. He's really good with words. I don't worry about her when I talk to him. He makes me so happy it's like she's not even sick anymore. He encouraged me to listen to her and smile as much as possible. He said it was because he loves my smile just as much as her, so it was for slightly selfish reasons he didn't want me to be upset. I thought he was cute.
Not only am I going through this metamorphic stage, but not one of my so called friends is giving two shits. Katie and Eliza are of course at each other's throats and won't go within ten feet of one another. Garrett is avoiding me because I'm stuck with Eliza 90 percent of the time. Hettie well she was still upset because Chris didn't send her a Christmas present, and she spent a sack of galleons on him, so I'll give her that, at least for a few more days. Speaking of Christmas, Al gave me a camera, whoever said men don't listen is a fucking liar.
"Fucking hell Riley, are you even listening to me?" Was she talking? Shit her face is that reddish purple color she gets when she's really pissed.
"Uh…yeah?" A loud screech from somewhere deep in her throat bubbled up and spewed out of her mouth echoing around the library.
"I'M TRYING TO FUCKING VENT AND YOU FUCKING ZONE OUT THINKING ABOUT YOU'RE NON EXISTENT LOVE LIFE! CAN YOU TRY NOT TO BE SO SELF-ABSORBED?"
"Wow, pot called the kettle black, bitch. Take a look in the mirror and listen to yourself talk. Then ask yourself who is self-absorbed." She didn't take that very well, resulting with our ban from the library.
_
I couldn't help myself. I kept thinking about him. How could I go through the first half of the year thinking he was some creepy stalker and suddenly I'm the one stalking him? It's a little bit embarrassing. I could never tell Eliza she'd never let me hear the end of it. Katie wouldn't be able to keep her gob shut. So that's why Hettie and I were hiding behind a suit of armor. We had been doing this for the past two weeks, ever since we got back from Winter Break, and our stealth skills have improved remarkably if I do say so myself. Whenever we weren't placating Eliza and Katie we were creeping.
We had followed Albus, Rose and Scorpius to the library where they proceeded to do absolutely nothing for an hour. We were about to leave when they started talking. Nothing really noteworthy was said until they packed up and started to leave, we were going to go the opposite direction, but he said my name. Now I can't let that slide. We followed hiding behind whatever random statue or piece of gaudy armor was in the hallway.
"I'm serious Al, it's been almost two months since you've had your little epiphany when the bloody hell are you actually going to do something?" Scorpius said. Well this wasn't exciting at all. This is the same conversation we've eavesdropped on the past three times. Scorpius nags at Al to ask me out and he says he will, that he's planning something, and then Rose tells them to drop it that she can't deal with them arguing all the time. And then the two of them say this is how their friendship works and she needs to deal with it. Then she and Scorpius fight and leave Al alone. It really is a sad routine for them. I rolled my eyes at Hettie and she shrugged her shoulders. We waited until they all left before going our separate ways.
Unfortunately for me Hettie wants things to be kept even in the stalking situation, so I was dragged out of the Great Hall one night in order to follow Chris Bane. Why she is still hung up on him I'll never know. But never the less I followed Hettie out onto the grounds in pursuit of the dopey towhead.
"Where did he even go?" I asked taking a dinner roll out of my pocket and ripping off a chunk.
"I think he went behind the greenhouses, and put that away, you can't eat on the job."
"This isn't a job I'm not getting paid."
"Shut up, someone will hear us." I rolled my eyes, and continued to eat. We made our way around greenhouse five. I almost slammed into Hettie when she stopped suddenly.
"Do you hear that?"
"No."
"Shh. Listen." I listened for a moment and I heard two voices, one was definitely Chris, I'd be able to distinguish his frilly voice anywhere. The other one was distinctly feminine, only a few octaves higher than Chris's. Hettie grabbed my arm and pulled me closer to the voices. Ducking behind a bush we peaked through the leaves at the pair. I heard Hettie gasp and felt her tense next to me. I looked closer at the girl, and almost pissed myself. It was Hettie's little sister. Bernadette was a Ravenclaw too, she was in her fifth year. She has black hair just like Hettie and the rest of their family, however Bernie had huge knockers, which made Hettie feel extremely jealous. Bernie and Chris were speaking in hushed tones as if they knew someone was trying to listen. I pulled two pairs of extendable ears out of my pocket and handed one to Hettie.
"I can't do it. I can't tell her." Chris said. He was starting to pace.
"Yes you can, you've already asked her. And she is so pissed. That's all she would talk about over break. If you don't do something about it she, or one of her barbaric friends will."
"Great, that's the last thing I need is Redding or Ray castrating me. Couldn't you drop some hints or something?" Why only Eliza or Katie, I can be a very imposing figure when I want to be.
"I have been she's just so oblivious."
"Couldn't you, you know?"
"Listen up bub. You sought me out remember? I gave you my opinion. It's your move. She's going to question everything between the two of you until you straight up tell her. She's an intellectual. She won't understand anything until it is explained logically to her. Now you can either pussy foot around until graduation, or you can tell her and hope for the best. But as you said, if you pussy foot, you might lose the one thing that distinguishes your gender." What the hell is going on here? What's Bernadette talking about? I feel like a secret agent. Like Nancy Drew or the Hardy Boys, or better yet all we need is a talking dog and we could be like the Scooby Doo people. Eliza is Daphne, Hettie is Velma, Katie is Freddy, shit that makes me Shaggy, nah Katie can be Shaggy she likes to eat more than me. Yeah but she's a jock like Freddy. Oh fuck it I'm missing real life shit, I'll figure out who Freddy and Shaggy are later, also I need to invest in a talking animal.
"I told you already, I've tried, I just don't think I'll be able to explain the situation. Also I'm a ruddy awful liar, I'd probably let something slip and she'd ask a question."
"Like what?"
"Like about you. Why I spend time with you, she would probably be offended if she knew I spent so much time with you and none with her."
"Of course she'd be offended. She'd probably assume the worst."
"What would that be?"
"That we're sleeping together." Holy shit! Are they sleeping together? Does Hettie think they are? I looked over at her. She was glaring daggers, lasers, and whatever deadly glare like weapons you can think of at the pair of them. It was a little frightening, considering Hettie is completely against violence of any and every kind. She ripped the extendable ear out and started to stand. Panicking I grabbed her arm and pulled her back.
"What the hell Hettie? We can't be seen. How daft are you, you stupid Ravenclaw?" she just growled at me, like literally growled.
"Did you hear that?" Chris said his voice trembling, little bitch. "Is it a full moon? There aren't werewolves in the forest are there? Can they get up to the castle?"
"No there are protective wards, and if you care to look up the moon is crescent. Not full."
"But you had to have heard that. Is there something else? Could there be something else?" At this point in time Hettie gave another growl, probably because I was sitting on her. With a remarkable demonstration of strength she threw me off of her. Unfortunately she threw me into the bush and making a lot of noise in the process.
"AAAAHHHHH!" Those two idiot Ravens booked it back to the castle, screaming with their arms flailing about. I waited until they were out of earshot to start laughing. And God I couldn't stop. It was the funniest shit I'd ever seen. I was rolling around in the almost melted snow not even caring that I was soaked to the bone. I need a pensieve so I can store that memory and relive it over and over. Funniest faces ever. I think Bane's jaw might have come unhinged and his eyes popped out of his skull. I rolled over and smashed into Hettie. I looked up and stopped laughing at the murderous look on her face.
"That whore." Was all she said before jumping up and storming toward the castle. I got up and ran after her.
"Hettie, this is all speculation. First of all we were spying, second we have no proof that they're in some secret relationship, and third you can't kill your own sister."
"I'm not going to kill her."
"You can't kill Bane either, you'll be arrested. And I don't fancy visiting you in Azkaban."
"How could she do that to me? How could he?"
"I'm not sure, but hey how about we ask Katie and Eliza, you know. Or, or what about Al, or Garrett. They're guys I'm sure they'd be able to figure out what's going on. They're outside parties. Neither one is really close with you so it wouldn't be suspicious."
"Yes but you have them both wrapped around your finger and would do whatever you asked. That is suspicious."
"Well we could-"
"No. I'm going to confront them."
"We have no proof."
"She said they were sleeping together."
"Uh, no she didn't. She said it's what you would assume if you found out they had been meeting up. And lo and behold that's what you assume."
"Because she said it."
"Because she knew that's how you would think."
"And why's that?"
"Uh I don't know maybe because she's your sister and she's known you her whole life."
"Exactly, which is why this is an even bigger betrayal." I rolled my eyes and continued to follow her to the Great Hall. We were almost to the doors when a trio of people walked out. A blonde, a brunette, and a red head, it sounded like the beginning to a very bad joke. Too bad the joke's on me.
"Hey Hamilton."
"Hey Scorpius."
"Riley, why are you all wet?" Rose asked.
"Oh you know out playing in what's left of the snow."
"At night?" Albus asked skeptically.
"Yes that's when I play best." Scorpius smirked and wiggled his eyebrows at me. My cheeks flamed up instantly. My God can that boy find a sexual innuendo in every conversation. Rose cleared her throat and glared at her boyfriend.
"Well we'll let the two of you go about your business. Scorp, will you walk me up?" Scorpius rolled his eyes, but took her hand none the less, leading her up the Grand staircase. Al watched them for a moment with a scowl on his face before turning back to me.
"So you like to play best at night. You seem of a more after lunch type of gal." Al smirked at me, and I blushed again.
"Well I play any chance I get, but I do have preferences." I grinned up at him my blush cooling down.
"Well if I promise to play nicely, could I join you one evening?" Oh shit, when did he become so confident and flirty? I'm a bad influence on him. If anyone heard him they'd be floored. Wait where did Hettie go? I was about to say something when I heard a scream coming from the Great Hall. Al and I walked to the doors. There was a crowd forming around two people rolling on the ground, Hettie and Bernadette.
"YOU WHORE!" Hettie screeched at her little sister.
"WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT PSYCHO?"
"YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT SKANK!"
"MAYBE I WOULD IF YOU TOLD ME INSTEAD OF TACKLING ME TO THE GROUND!"
"YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!" Holy shit. Hettie's beating the crap out of her. Well you know what they say, Hell hath no fury. Maybe I should do something. I turned back to Al.
"Rain check on our play date, I've got to intervene. I'll see you later though." I was about to walk away when he pulled me in for a hug. If this was anyone else it would be normal, but this is Al. This was touch-me-and-die, Albus Potter, the same person who flips out when his mother tries to hug him goodbye on the platform. It took me a moment before I hugged back. He then proceeds to almost give me a heart attack, and simultaneously cause my stomach to erupt with a thousand winged insects. He kisses my forehead. It's now my turn to tense up. What the hell? He let go and stepped away with an awkward look on his face, scratching the back of his neck.
"Uh, yeah, I guess I'll see you later."
"Um yeah sure, see ya." He turned around and sped out of the Great Hall. After a second or two I calmed down and turned around to see half the school staring at me. There were many angry glares from the 'Albus Potter Fan Club' and a lot of slack jawed others. Even Professor Longbottom was staring at me, as he held Hettie and Bernadette apart. "What are you people looking at? Mind your own bloody business. Jeeze never thought I'd be more entertaining than a girl fight." Bypassing my friend who was obviously already in trouble I sat down at the Hufflepuff table and began to eat the dinner I was pulled away from. Before I could even cut into my steak two people fell into the bench on either side of me.
"What the bloody hell was that?"
"Are you like emitting these crazy juice pheromones that make him gaga?"
"What are you doing that makes him so friendly?"
"Did you suck his dick?"
"I bet she did the dirty skank." Now I wish I had just walked away and gone to bed. I turned to my left and right and looked at Meghan Longbottom, and Patricia Herriot, both of whom were glaring at me.
"Not all of us need to blow a guy for them to like us. We have this thing called a personality, you should go find one, and then you might not be so unfortunate to be around."
"Watch your tongue before I cut it out Hamilton." Herriot snapped at me.
"Why? Do you need an extra one for the gangbang you're attending later? I'm sure there's a spell that can help you out, surely you don't have to resort to violence." I really should just stop talking or I'm going to get shanked in my sleep. If I'm not shanked maybe I should look into a job as a professional cook because she just got served.
"You fucking bitch!"
"Hey now, watch your language there are children present."
"I don't give a damn about what those snot nosed ankle biters hear."
"Really you should, it might come back to bite you in the ass." I looked over at Longbottom and could tell she wanted to join the conversation but couldn't think of a good enough response to throw in. Poor dumb bitch.
"Do you know what's going to bite you in the ass Hamilton?"
"Hopefully not a disease ridden rodent. That would be nasty."
"No bitch, my wand, as it curses you into the next century."
"Really I didn't know wands could bite."
"You know what she means bitch, she's going to kick your ass in a duel." Meghan jumped in.
"She never said duel cunt licker." Her face morphed into that offended look that women get sometimes. She started to stutter out a response but Patricia stopped her. Normally I'm not this mean, but damn these two and their little gaggle of friends have made my life miserable for years.
"No I'm not going to duel you I'm going to get you when you least expect it. I'm going to get you so bad you'll wish you had never been born."
"Is that a threat Miss Herriot?" Patricia and Meghan whirled around. I smiled up at Professor McGonagall. She might be old but this dame had a lot of fire in her.
"Uh, um, no Professor, I was just talking to Riley about, an assignment."
"Really, for what class may I ask?"
"Uh…"
"Defense!" Meghan practically yelled. McGonagall looked like she wanted to smack her out of irritation alone.
"Miss Longbottom, Miss Herriot, I would appreciate you not threatening other students. Especially for something as petty as a misguided crush. If I hear anything of the sort ever again, I promise you, you will not get off lightly." The two nodded and walked away. I turned to the Headmistress and smiled.
"Thanks Professor, I didn't think I'd ever be able to finish my dinner."
"It wasn't a problem Miss Hamilton. However I must ask you, if you are ever hassled by one of Mr. Potter's fans, please report it. I do not tolerate bullying in my school. It is not all harmless fun, and by the looks of Miss Herriot, I doubt she was joking."
"Yes ma'am."
"Very well, carry on with your meal."
"Have a good evening Professor."
"You too, child. You too."
