(Maura's pov)

Maura Isles was always a life-strong woman. She had learned from a young age not to show her feelings and always hold your head up. She was an Isles, a lady of the upper classes. A status which demanded high standards how to act and to live in a certain way. Emotions weren't a thing you did show or even suppose to have. Jane showed her different. Jane was a force of power and strong feelings that came in the softly rippling life of Maura Isles, mixed everything up and reconstructed Maura and all she had ever learned anew.

Jane became Maura's lifeline for the feelings Maura herself could not express, and slowly Maura strolled into an emotional way of living too. During her friendship with the rough acting but softhearted detective Maura fell in love. She may have had crushes on men, even be a little bit infatuated with some of them, but never felt Maura that strong as she felt for Jane Rizzoli.

The social awkward lady of the upper class fell for the blue colored Boston Detective Jane Rizzoli as she had never fallen before. She forgot rank and etiquette, all became fuzzy and all became clear at the same time. Pieces of herself fell apart and were put together again in a way she would never have predicted a few years ago.

Her future was planned the minute she became an Isles. She would marry a man with high status and money, have at least an heir with this man, go to charities and live her life in the boredom and loneliness that would come through the years of being the arm-candy and marionette of a man with a high status. Smiling if she was supposed to smile, being compassionate and understanding when needed, smart but not too smart. Her social status would be nothing more than collect money for the isles foundation or the charity foundation of his choice. She would fade and blurred into a dark and lonely world of well-played perfection, but then came Jane...

Falling in love with Jane felt so naturally, as if all fell into place. Her life, her future... Unplanned but certainly not unwanted. The moment the penny dropped so to speak, the moment she realized and knew for certain that Jane was the person she wanted. Her soulmate, her future, not a future as planned, or as her mother had hoped for. But then, Maura could care less! Of course she had told her mother nothing about her feelings for Jane, but her mother was a smart woman and Maura knew that her mother at least suspected something, but had faith in Maura's upbringing that demanded from her to act as the woman she was supposed to be, a sophisticated Isles.

Being an Isles meant to keep up the appearance of being happy, fulfilled, the Isles were more than money and high status, it was an institution of economic and political influence. Maura had the duty to fulfill her role as the heir of this powerful institution.

Jane could be a mistress, a courtesan but never a wife to Maura. But Maura would if her feelings ever would be reciprocated, not hesitate and choose for love. Yes, she was certain of it, she would always choose Jane!

Angela Rizzoli, the loud but loving Italian mama, Jane's mother. She meddled her way into Jane's life and through the years even into Maura's life and right into the heart of the Medical examiner, who was used to being neglect, ignored and bullied. Angela made the happiness of her children her first priority, always the best intentions, but somehow never did the right things to achieve this.

When Angela came with a plan to win Jane over, and Maura wanted so desperately to be with Jane. Every fiber of her body and mind yearned for her. For the first time in her 36 years of being carefully planning every phase in her life she took the chance for happiness and agreed to go with a plan where the outcome could be not predicted. Blindly and utterly in love she went with Angela Rizzoli's plan.. Maura could only hope for the best and fuck the rest!

** Previous...

After Angela went back to the guest-house Maura prepared everything for the hour that would decide her destiny. She went to her favorite lingerie-shop and bought a sinfully sexy lingerie-set in light-blue. The light-blue bra didn't leave much of one's imagination, and Maura hoped sincerely it would pop-up Jane's heart as open as it would pop-up her eyes. She went to the library, the bookshop and even the second-hand market in search of the right books and magazines on seduction and (as she called it) the mating behavior of human beings. Hell, she even went for some nature books in her eager to look for the right lecture! And what is the best thing to do when you want to know how to conquer a partner then nature itself!?

Packed with lingerie, books, a few magazines, new makeup, whipped cream and strawberries and all the little stuff she thought could be useful she went to her beautiful house in Beacon Hill.

She read the remaining hours until she needed to be ready for her 'night with Jane', reading and learning and rehearsing. She made notes, learned some sex lines to say to Jane. She showered and took extra care on the sexy smokey eyes look one of the books recommended. It was the look for I'm ready to the naughty deed, this was what the book said, so Maura thought, 'Why not! If I go out of my comfort zone tonight, why not all the way!' This look wasn't something she felt comfortable with, but to make her intentions know seems to require it, at least according to the book!

As organized as Maura was she made a list of plans and carefully set Angela's seduction plan in motion in her typical Maura kind of way. In the effort to do so she forgot 'the Jane factor' and therefore to rethink her actions. She was so filled with her desire for Jane's love and affection that she forgot that this plan simply couldn't work and was plain stupid. But love makes a fool of everybody, including the very educated, sophisticated and genius Doctor Maura Isles the Chief Medical examiner of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts.

So at 08 pm exactly Jane walked into Maura's house in Beacon Hill with no knowledge of what was awaiting her in Maura's bedroom.

"Maura...Maura-a-a!" she heard Jane worriedly shout as she entered Maura's house. At that exact moment, Maura threw her peignoir hastily in the closet and draped herself on her king-sized bed. She pushed the button 'play' of her DVD player and soft music filled her bedroom, which made the scene even more unrealistic. With a hammering heart, Maura awaited the arrival of a very concerned Jane Rizzoli in her bedroom.

The dimmed light in her bedroom and the unrealistic atmosphere in her bedroom made Maura a bit anxious. She had rehearsed this moment until she had to shower and prepare herself for Jane's arrival, but right now she wasn't that certain if their little plan of seduction would work. She had that uneasy feeling in her stomach she normally would have if something wasn't right. Before she could ponder herself into a catastrophic mess, Jane arrived in the door-opening of the door to her bedroom, clearly out of breath.

Maura heard her run upstairs, and a running Jane is in this scenario, a worried Jane. Maura didn't exactly know what Angela had told Jane so she would come over to Beacon Hill, but Jane's behavior predicted no good! 'Fuck' the well educated Doctor Maura Isles thought to herself, 'Go with the flow, although I think, I'm going to sink!'

Under smokey-eyes lashes, Maura's gaze locked into Jane's worried-looking dark brown eyes. Maura was draped in a very strange position that was recommended as very sexy and suggested sensuality, according to one of the little romantic novels she had read. Although that she could feel her back and several other parts of her body protest at this ridiculous pose, Maura bit her tongue and went for it anyway. 'Jane is sooo worth it!' she thought while she bravely endured the torture, and said with the sexiest voice she could produce, "Hi, Jane..."

Jane looked very strangely at her, almost comically, and rubbed her eyes, "Maura?" she said.

Thinking about this scene of the police officer and the young maiden she had read in another old-fashioned romantic novel she continued her game, while her heart pounded as crazy.

"Care to join me, my hot Detective?" Maura started to play with her over her should falling honey-blond curls and twirled one of her curls around her finger and moisturized her upper lip. "The cat got your tongue, my little stud?" she said as she looked at Jane who had indeed, as desired her eyes popped out of the sockets.

Jane had looked at Maura from up to down and when her eyes found Maura's delicious looking bosom, her gaze was practically glued to the over-whelming and over-presently bosom of her best friend.

"Maura?" Jane said again, this time a little bit hesitated it seemed, looking up and down at Maura who laid there in her sinfully sexy light-blue lingerie.

When she finally tore her gaze from Maura, she tried to look at anything but at her and Maura had this alarming feeling in her gut that it didn't go as well as she and Angela had so carefully planned.

The look in Jane's eyes was the one she saw so many times in documentaries about animals who tried to escape from a dangerous situation, and that look alarmed Maura and made her caution regarding her actions. 'Had she gone too far. Did she do something wrong!?'

Maura decided that she would throw the old plan overboard and do it as Jane would do it herself, acting and then thinking. Maura hoped for the best and so she stood up from her bed and walked in front of the woman she loved. Maura grabbed Jane's neck and reach up to her for a kiss, but Jane stopped her!

Maura felt her heart drop like a stone and said in an insecure voice "W-whats the matter, Jane. Don't you lust for me?"

Then the woman she loved said to her, "I I I can't, Maur..."

Jane's voice faltered and she stepped back and didn't dare to look into Maura's eyes. Maura felt tears threatening to fall, she tried to compose herself, but as she heard Jane say, "No.. I want to know what the fuck is going on here! Maura, why..?" Maura lost the battle of not crying and be brave and her heart felt like someone ripped it out of her body. Daggers stabbed through to her body and through her brain, overwhelmed by the chaos of emotion that flooded over her.

In her fuzzy brain and with the last power of self-preservation she could muster Maura said "Your mother.."

"My mother?" Jane almost shouted these, "My mother is behind this. Maura!? Tell me it's a cruel joke?" Jane looked into Maura's eyes and all that Maura could say in a strangled and very timid voice, "She thought it was a good idea, and.."

Jane interrupted the over-emotional Maura again, "You think this is a kind of joke, this is funny, Maura? Please, tell me..." Jane shook her head and said harshly. "I'm out of here!

As Jane turned around a walked away with large steps, Maura lost the fight against her tears and upcoming painful emotions and she broke down, falling on her knees on the floor. She sobbed as the painful feeling of being ripped into pieces rolled like a thunder through her heartbroken brain and body. She felt her heart break and it did hurt so much, her brain sent her into a nightmare of dream sequences, and in a horrible nightmare who ripped her open for the slaughter.

A short while later Maura heard the front door open and then close and she was alone... 'Alone' was all she could think of. 'Always alone...'

Maura thought and cried, thought more, and cried more that night.

'Didn't Jane want her, had she misinterpreted Jane's signals towards her? The longing gazes, the subtle and lingering touches. Was she all wrong? Did she make a fool of herself again, did she bring Jane in an awkward situation? Was Jane angry at her for bringing her in this precarious situation'

As Maura's crying vanished into the dark squiggles or her subconscious mind because she couldn't take it anymore, she laid there in a tiny ball of misery on the floor of her bedroom and fell asleep. It was 07 am by then...