Ikuto: So you're gonna post now liar?
Amu: Ikuto, right now isn't the time.
Ikuto: Why?
Amu: *whispers*
Ikuto: W-what?
Cali: *walks in head down* hey...
Amu: It's okay, Cali.
Cali: No it's not! My friend is thinking about killing herself because of her freakin' parents! I've tried everything and I just...*sobs*
Amu: *comforts*
Cali: My name isn't Cali, it's actually Cathleen.
Amu: Oh...
Cali: But I'm still using Cali.

(Guys, I'm in a very bad mood right now because what you read up there is actually true. My friend wants to kill herself. She says her parents are stressing her too much and they've been actually hitting her. Please review and help me and tell me what I should do. I need help. Please)

Recap

That baka. I still hate him although my stomach doesn't. It rumbled happily. I started out at the stars.

"Mama, Papa, don't worry, I'm coming. Soon." I whispered before drifting off to sleep, thinking about murder.

End of Recap

Amu POV

I woke up in a white room. A steady beeping sound was heard and I turned towards the source. A heart rate monitor. Its beige cord was connected to my wrist. And right next to it, an IV. The thing that was keeping me alive.

Death thoughts swarmed my brain.

'If I just unlatched it...'
'If I just rip it out...'

My shoulders sagged and soundless tears trickled down my face. It spotted the blankets that lay on me. I looked around again and the spotted some scalpels and other surgical utensils. I grabbed the knife and ran a finger down its sharp edge. It slit my finger and red liquid dripped from the cut, down to my arm, then stained the sheets. My eyes trailed the line of blood it made and finally rested on the little stain. I then watched as the spot grew bigger and bigger, its scarlet color forever staining the perfect white.

'Just cut deeper...'

'Slash it through your heart...'

'End the pain...'

'Nobody cares anymore...'

'It's impossible...'

'Just give it up-'

A low growl was heard from the door. My dull honey eyes met anger-glazed blue ones. With three long strides, he was beside me. He took the knife out of my hands and set it on the table while scooting the table out of my reach. He turned his eyes towards me.

"Stop. Just stop." He snarled softly.

I lowered my gaze and didn't answer. He doesn't deserve and answer.

A finger lifted my chin, forcing me to meet the burning pools of midnight.

"Answer me, Amu." He hissed.

I didn't answer, but just glared at him. He dropped his hand and I slumped back into my pillow in exhaustion.

"You can't just pity yourself forever." He turned and walked out, leaving my heart, broken in a pool of blood.

I looked hatefully at the IV blood transplanter. It was the only thing keeping me alive right now when I wanted to die. It was so tempting. An easy, painless death. So easy, yet hard to do. I continued to glare at it.

The door opened again and my heart skipped a bit. But when I realized that it was just the nurses, it fell back. Hard. They rushed over with a plate of food but I just ignored it.

"Please, Hinamori-san, eat. It's good for you when you're recovering. You lost a massive amount of blood so you are in a weak state. Food will give you more energy." One of the nurses tried reasoning with me.

They tried to put the food in front of me but I just pushed it off. It fell with a 'bang' on the marble floor.

"Suki-san, please get some towels and a mop." the nurse who had tried getting me to eat said.

The younger looking nurse hurried away and the other nurse began carefully picking up the broken glass shards and disposing them away in a plastic trash bag. I turned to stare out of a window. Two birds were sitting together on a branch, in their nest. The more colorful one, probably the male, nuzzled the smaller female. They chirped together as they took off. They flew a few circles together before flying off.

I watched as the two figures slowly disappeared from view. I sighed quietly to myself before turning my back towards the cleaning nurse and pulled the covers above my head. The air was muffled but I didn't do anything about it. It could suffocate me for all I care. I closed my eyes but was interrupted when the fresh, cool air, met my lungs and face. I glared at the figure above, annoyed at their actions.

"That's not very good for you, Hinamori-san." the nurse said, concerned.

I snatched my blankets away, along with a hateful glare, and scooted myself away. The nurse sighed and left, shutting the door quietly behind her.

It seems as if I just hated everyone. Everyone was trying to help me, but I hated their pity. They pitied me because I was weak. But they don't know the real meaning. What it's like living the way I did. My parents were killed in front of my very own eyes. My 5 year old eyes. I was taken away and forced into an abusing foster home. Home after home. Everyone pitied me and yet I still get raped. If you enjoy it so much, just find yourself a girlfriend or boyfriend. Some 40 year old's raped me when I was just seven. SEVEN! I don't even know if I still even have my freakin' virginity!

I bit my pillow in a desperate attempt to relieve my anger but ended up just to pull away in disgust at the bitter, hospital taste. There's nothing good about hospitals. You feel trapped and you can even feel the presence of death. The smell of death. Doesn't the thought of that just make you go mad? It chilled me to the bone.

Beep

Beep

Beep

The annoying 'beep's snapped me out of my thoughts. Just wait until a doctor comes in just to find a frail little girl, dead on this stupid hospital bed with the monitor forever ringing. The bells of death.

I suddenly ripped the IV out of my arm, drawing out blood, along with the monitor. The monitor stopped beeping and I stumbled across the room. I opened some random cabinets and pulled out some pills. Sleeping pills. I took out ten, which was warned not to have and can cause death, and was about to put them in my mouth when a firm hand caught my bloody wrist.

"You think you're ending the pain for you, right?" His husky voice said roughly.

I turned but he just grabbed my chin.

"No, Amu. You look at me. When I first met you, I didn't care. I thought you were just another random girl that means nothing to me but a speck of dust."

I winced at his words as a tear leaked out of my eye.

"But when we got to know each other a bit more, I started to warm up to you. I didn't blame Utau, Kukai, Rima, and Nagihiko. Well not all, anyway. I blamed myself for not keeping track of you. I felt as if it was my responsibility to protect you. And that night, when you go raped." He spoke the word 'raped' through gritted teeth.

"I couldn't forgive myself. I wanted to help you. No needed to help you." He continued.

"Then why didn't you?" I screamed through my tears. "I thought you gave up on me, like everyone. I hated all this pity. I hated it! No one understood me like you did. You knew what it felt like. You were in my position!"

It all came pouring out.

"I wanted to kill myself. And I was going to. Why start caring now? Why didn't you a long time ago? You let me suffer through this pain and I remember when I closed the door on you that day, you didn't even give a second try. I remember, I remember all of it!" I screamed, weakly pounding at his chest.

He stood stiff.

"I had to wait for the right time. I tried but you didn't budge. I knew I had to wait when it was really bad. You don't know how MUCH it pained me to see you in your condition. But something told me to hold back. I came back to talk to you but I opened the door to see you about to kill yourself. My mind clicked and I knew it was time." He lowered his voice.

"I didn't know if I could do it. I was still traumatized by my own experiences. Didn't you ever stop and think about me? Others who cared about you and loved you?" His voice rose.

I scoffed.

"Yea, I have no one left. No one loves me or cares about me."

"You're wrong. I care. Your friends care. You know what? You're worried about yourself. You think you're just ending the pain for you. But really, you're just passing it on to others. Do you not realize how selfish you're being? You just care about yourself. You don't stop and think about others. You're just sorry for yourself." His voice turned into a yell.

I turned and hid behind my bangs.

"Then go, if I'm so selfish. Let me die and then there will be one less selfish person in this world..." I whispered. "THEN JUST LET ME BURN IN HELL FOR ALL YOU CARE!" I screamed the last part, tears streamed down in rivers down my cheek as I ran away.

Firm arms grabbed me.

"Let me go! You don't care! Just let me go!" I screamed, punching him.

He didn't let loose.

"But I love you."

I froze at the four words.

"I love you even though I don't know you that well. You get me and I get you. I want you back, not this emotionless, lifeless Amu, I want a bright, cheerful bubbly Amu. I know if you just wake up from your nightmares, you'll find the light."

My eyes widened in shock.

Ikuto...He's the boy from my dreams...I think...I love-

But before I could finish, warm lips pressed against mine own, much to my own shock.

Ikuto...

Cali: So...How was it?
Amu: *sniffle* It was s-so s-sad...
Ikuto: YES, I GOT TO KISS HER!
Cali: Way to ruin the moment...
Ikuto: What? Jealous?
Cali: You wish...*inside head 'yes!'*
Ikuto: Ah, read over your shoulder, you are *tease*
Cali: So! My old boyfriend was just a jerk.
Amu: Aw, it's okay. Ikuto, give her a hug.
Ikuto: NO!
Amu: YES!
Ikuto: Fine...*hugs lightly*
Cali: Ew, get your paws over neko.
Ikuto: THIS is why...

Read and Review please! (Also for my friend.:( I can't sleep today)