25th May 2010
Rating T
12. Camera
It had spent them the better part of the evening to get this far. Kakashi had proven to be a surprisingly awkward social butterfly, so it had been mostly up to Sakura to charm their way into the ambassador's house warming party and mingle well enough to ensure they looked vaguely like they were supposed to be there and weren't up to anything suspicious. It had been especially nerve-racking when they had unwittingly fallen into the ambassador's path and had to explain who they were and why they'd been invited. Fortunately, being an ambassador, it was the man's job to pretend to know people he didn't know, and after bantering about their imaginary history, Kakashi and Sakura were finally able to slip away with none being the wiser. One minor distraction later and they were past the guards and into the quieter labyrinth of the house not open to guests.
"His office is on the second floor. Come on," Kakashi beckoned. Together they padded silently along the marble floored halls and up a carpeted set of stairs. The ambassador's office door was easy to find – it was the largest, most ornate one in the corridor. It was also locked. But since Kakashi had a jutsu for every occasion, they were inside in half a second, and faced with a room of many shelves and locked cabinets.
"I'll start from the left, you start from the right," she whispered, even though there was no one on this floor to hear them. Like the true professionals they were, they got to work.
"Hey, Sakura, look at this."
She glanced over her shoulder at her partner in crime and gave a great roll of her eyes. Kakashi had found the ambassador's cupboard of tupées and was now sporting a rather fetching black wig. "Put it back," she hissed. "We're here to find the documents, not play dress up."
"You're such a spoil sport," he chided, but he obediently put the hairpiece back and resumed his search, humming in amusement whenever he unearthed anything new and strange. He wasn't taking this assignment seriously at all, so it was no wonder that Sakura found the trade documents first.
"Got them," she said, as she spread them out on the oak desk and pulled out her tiny, noiseless camera to begin taking as many pictures as she could. They couldn't leave any trace that they'd been here, so it was impossible to take the documents with them. A photocopier would have been nice, but pictures would have to do for now. While she clicked away furiously, Kakashi poked at a small statue of a headless woman with enormous breasts.
"The Other Half have way too much time, money, and repressed sexual urges on their hands," he sighed.
"That's an icon of an ancient fertility goddess," she corrected. "Don't poke her."
"Seems like the only thing you should do to an ancient fertility goddess," he retorted, straightening up to stretch his arms so high his shoulders clicked.
"There, that should do it," Sakura said, shuffling the papers back into their original order and moving to replace them back onto the shelves behind the door. Kakashi continued to fiddle with a magnetic pen holder on the desk, curious how a pen could stand so perfectly straight while balancing only on its nib.
Sakura slipped the documents back into the exact place she'd found them. Then disasters struck. In the crack between the door and is frame, a shadow moved, breaking the light streaming from the corridor. She froze, for it was already too late.
"What the hell are you doing in my office?"
The ambassador had arrived.
Kakashi spun guiltily to face the door, but as far as the ambassador was concerned, he was alone. He couldn't see Sakura crouched in the shadows, and that was their only advantage left. Keep him busy, she prayed to Kakashi, though sadly he was not a mind-reader. As long as Kakashi could hold the man's attention, she might just be able to sneak around behind him and knock him unconscious without a fuss. Their mission may have been severely compromised, but it was all they could do now they're been caught with their fingers in the cookie jar.
"Ambassador," Kakashi said smoothly, as if he'd expected the other man all along. He leant his hip against the desk and gave him a hooded look. "I was wondering when you would come along... I've been waiting for you."
"Waiting for me?" the ambassador repeated incredulously. He came a few steps into the room. A few steps more and Sakura would be able to slip behind him.
"Of course... your wife is quite clingy, I didn't know how else to get you alone." Kakashi reached up to ease the mask down his face. "I hope I wasn't wrong... I felt quite the connection between us when we met downstairs."
It seemed Kakashi was going for the old seduction trick, usually only viable for kunoichi. It might work though. In a moment the ambassador would probably get flustered and deny what he thought were the earnest advances of a handsome young man and be so embarrassed he'd send Kakashi away without a fuss. The mission could be salvaged after all. Nice one, Kakashi-sensei, she thought, proud of her sensei's ability to always think on the fly.
"You're quite presumptuous, aren't you?" the ambassador, remarked, moving forward again. Sakura eased out from behind the door, ready to back through it and wait outside for Kakashi when he was inevitably sent packing. "Who let you in here? Was it Hideki?"
"Yes," said Kakashi guilelessly.
"The man has a good taste." Then the ambassador reached up to stroke a finger down Kakashi's cheek.
Sakura's mouth dropped open. For a split second, so did Kakashi's, though he quickly recovered, turning his shocked gaffe into something resembling a pleasured sigh.
"Oh, ambassador," he moaned, and then for some reason they were kissing, and Kakashi was flapping his hand frantically behind the ambassador's back at Sakura, hinting she should get the hell out of there while she had the chance.
Sakura ignored him, instead lifting her camera to her eye...
Then the men turned, and Kakashi was the one pinning the ambassador to the desk. If the man opened his eyes he would definitely see Sakura – so with just one last click she silently scampered out of the room and hid in the nearest alcove.
She worried her lip as she waited and listened to the moans and the sounds of things like magnetic pens falling off desks. So her sensei's chastity was being deeply compromised, but at least she had the pictures to prove it.
After what seemed like far too long, she heard Kakashi making excuses – something about not wanting his heart broken – and then he was emerging from the office, blowing kisses to the man within. As he passed Sakura's alcove, he grabbed her hand and hurried her on towards the stairs, still with that strained smile on his face.
"How far did you get?" she whispered. "Second base, right?"
"Got enough photos?" he whispered back curtly.
"I'm sorry, my finger slipped on the button," she said innocently. "About eighteen times, would you believe?"
Perhaps she shouldn't be teasing him about this, for suddenly she found herself pushed against the wall in the secluded landing halfway down the stairs, Kakashi looming over her, no longer all smiles and sultry pouts. "Sorry," he said, fingers twisted quite firmly in her lapels. "I need to get the taste of diplomacy and closet homosexuality out of my mouth."
"What- mmf!"
Kakashi's mouth closed over hers with punishing force. It occurred to her that he could just as easily have wiped his mouth on his sleeve if it bothered him so much, but she didn't care. Kakashi's skilled lips moved over hers and his breath fanned across her cheek, and it was the most glorious thing she'd felt in all her eighteen years of life. She gasped and sighed, just as easily seduced as the ambassador had been, and turned her head to allow him to taste the skin of her throat and nip her delicious ear lobe.
Another groan, escaped her throat, echoed by his deeper, fainter one. Two people could easily get carried away like this, and if this was how Kakashi reacted to every bad taste in his mouth, Sakura planned to be there slipping soap shavings into his sandwiches for a long time to come.
His body pressed against hers tightly and she nearly melted with a quivery sigh. Only then did he pull back a little, mindful of the fact that he was really the only thing keeping her up. "Better?" she whispered against his lips, gazing up at him with a completely new respect.
"Could be better," he murmured, staring at her mouth hungrily.
"We could find a hotel for the night... figure out other ways to repair your masculinity."
"Mm," he hummed, liking that suggestion enough to lean in and bump noses with her. "Ah – wait – my finger slipped."
Sakura blinked in confusion, then – noting his self-satisfied grin – she followed his gaze to something he was holding up near their heads.
The camera.
"You didn't-!" she gasped, scandalised.
"Must have slipped a dozen times there," he said, doing a bad job of sounding contrite. "I'm so sorry."
"Kakashi – give me that camera." She reached for it, but he whipped it out of her reach and stuffed it into one of his pockets. "You can have it back once we get to the hotel... if you figure out a way to divest it from my person."
Sakura raised an eyebrows. She would be divesting a lot off his person if she had her own way, and from Kakashi's responding leer, he didn't intend to go down without a fight.
Tsunade's face was unreadable as she examined the photos lined up on her desk. The pictures of the documents were invaluable, exactly what the client had demanded and the village would be paid handsomely for these.
Unfortunately... the rest of them...
Tsunade had no idea what purpose photos of Kakashi kissing a man in an obvious tupée were. Nor the many photos of Kakashi and Sakura kissing in what looked like a stairwell. The photo of a naked Kakashi sprawled on a bed, sleeping, was not one that Tsunade had needed or wanted to see. The next one clearly taken up his nostrils was only slightly less offensive. Then there were the pictures of Sakura bent over in tight white panties, taken from a very admiring angle.
The hokage looked up at the two shinobi before her, who were both studiously looking everywhere except at her. They had only enough decency to look a little ashamed.
"I have never seen such flagrant abuse of village property in my life," she admonished. "What do you two have to say for yourselves?"
Kakashi coughed. "Can I keep this one," he asked politely, pointing to the picture of Sakura in nothing but her panties.
"If he gets to keep one, can I keep this one?" Sakura tapped the picture Kakashi stripped of everything (including his dignity).
"No way," he said.
"Yeah way. It's a really flattering angle, don't you think... makes it look way bigger than it actually is."
"Ah, that's true..."
Tsunade reclined in her chair, covering her eyes with a fatigued sigh. "This is why we can't have nice things."
