In which we have an ambush, changing POVs, and Trolls being raging shippers.
To make things easier, Troll nicknames for the company are as follows: Thorin (Pretty Boy), Dwalin (Beef Jerky), Balin (Dad), Dori (Mom), Nori (Slim Jim), Ori (Gizmo Jr), Bifur (Gizmo), Bofur (Giggles), Bombur (Bon Bon), Oin (Gramps), Gloin (Grumbles), and Fili and Kili ... well, you'll see.
Theme song - Rumble And Sway by Jamie N Commons
"Take the east path in four. Ironside, over and out."
Bilbo frowned and pulled the ear bud free, squinting down at its little knobs again and tried to figure out what direction to turn the volume dial.
"Adjusting it again?"
Ori was the one leaning forward to ask, but Fili was watching them with drowsy eyes. At least his brother was still asleep.
Bilbo nodded. "Too quiet this time. It doesn't help that I don't have my glasses and we're losing the light."
He frowned at the tiny machine and rubbed at his ear while Ori took the device from him. The youth produced a flashlight and what looked to be a mini screwdriver - how he balanced the three items without dropping anything, Bilbo didn't know - before he set to working on it.
"It's still irritating you?" Fili's voice was rough with sleep, but low in deference to his brother. He blinked slowly and Bilbo was reminded of the image of a lazing cat.
Bilbo nodded, but it was Dori who spoke next. "They're like that sometimes, especially the older models. It'll take some time to get used to, but once you do, you'll be loathe to upgrade."
Bilbo gave him a rueful grin and shook his head. "I'm hoping that I won't be needing it that long. With my luck, we'll be about finished with this whole mess by the time I finally adjust to the damn thing."
Dori gave a sympathetic chuckle and shook his head as well.
Bilbo found himself quite fond of Dori already. The eldest Lorison was polite, knew how to put a person at ease, and could more than hold a proper conversation. Bofur was another one that Bilbo enjoyed talking with, even if he was a bit more coarse. He was a friendly fellow, and Bilbo knew he had good intentions, but he also had a very particular brand of mischief - particular enough that it was easy to see who Fili and Kili had been taking lessons from.
Ori reached over the seat to hand the com back to Bilbo. "I've set it at four for volume this time and I've tightened up the casing a bit, so hopefully that will help with the discomfort." He watched while Bilbo dutifully replaced the small torture device back into his ear. "If it's still too loud, we might have to bounce it between three and four, depending on the ambient noise." The boy frowned as he spoke, tapping the screwdriver at the corner of his mouth. "I could give a try at taking it apart and creating a setting between the two, but it's not the best idea until we can get ahold of another com. Just in case."
Bilbo smiled and shook his head. "No, that's alright - we'll try this out for now. Thank you, for your help."
"Oh, it's no trouble." Ori grinned and shook his head, sitting back in his seat. "Gives me something to think on for when I need to give my gadgets a rest."
Dori had turned off the main road while Bilbo had been talking with Ori and, when Bilbo looked up again, he was surprised to see that they were approaching an old, rusted fence. It stretched in either direction for a good ways, interrupted at increments by collapsed and crumpled structures that might've served as guard towers in a younger day. It certainly wasn't a sight that suggested the place might be safe to stay at.
Bilbo blinked. "Um." He shifted and sent a sidelong glance at Dori, who looked just as skeptical of the place as he did. "This... it's just to throw others off?"
Dori pressed his lips together and his grip on the steering wheel seemed to tighten for a moment before he relaxed again. "I'm not sure," he admitted. "All of us have a collection of ... safe places that we can turn to if things become... unpleasant. It's likely that Thorin or one of the others came across this place in their travels." He paused. "Thorin wouldn't be leading us here if he wasn't confident that it was safe."
Bilbo nodded. He didn't say anything, but he did roll up the windows again and Dori was kind enough to turn on the air before Bilbo could ask him to.
They followed the broken asphalt as it wove among the charred hulls and broken faces of a number of abandoned buildings before arriving at the derelict ruin of what Bilbo assumed was a hangar. Dori slowed the vehicle to a stop alongside where the rest of the company had parked and both he and Bilbo took a moment to peer out the windows and up at the building in front of them.
The walls were rusted, but still standing, and the ceiling looked to be mostly solid. There were piles of what looked like mostly garbage and scrap metal littering the floor of the place. Some piles rather more resembled actual machines and vehicles than others, but there was certainly nothing that looked useful.
Bilbo sent Dori another look, and though Dori hesitated, he shrugged. "Bofur has a good eye for these things. He won't let us stay the night if he thinks there's any chance of the building collapsing on us as we take our rest."
Bilbo nodded. He could trust in that. Bofur did seem to have a sharp eye for things. All the company did, with the way that he watched them having two or three conversations all at once - although what any of them really meant Bilbo couldn't ever say - but he suspected Bofur to be of the sort that nothing ever surprised and, somehow, Bilbo found the thought remarkably comforting now.
"Foxhound Alpha, Bravo," Thorin's voice came over the com again. Bilbo startled at the suddenness, but was relieved to find the volume much more agreeable. "You're with the cleaning crew." Kili gave a whoop - entirely too loud in the small space of the vehicle - before he and his brother tumbled out and made their way towards where the others were gathering. "Shoemaker and Shelldrake, you know what to do. The rest of you sit tight, we won't be long."
Ori laughed a bit and shared a look with Dori before he too slid out of the transport. Dori exited the vehicle as well, heading to where Thorin stood speaking with Bofur and Balin.
Bilbo slipped free of the cursed machine and took advantage of everyone's distraction to close his eyes and take a deep breath. He was learning how to manage his travel sickness, but it was still a relief to be out of the vehicle.
When he opened his eyes again, one group - Thorin, Dwalin, Bofur, Fili, Kili and who he was pretty sure was Bifur and Nari - was heading off in one direction - wearing quite a bit more weaponry than Bilbo felt comfortable with - and another group - Bombur and was his name Goin? - headed in another.
Unsure of what else to do, Bilbo made his way over to the rest of the company to see if he could be helpful. Ori was already typing away at his portable when Bilbo reached him, and Dori and Balin were speaking quietly about something or other, so it was to Oin that Bilbo turned to for answers.
"Is everything alright?"
Oin glanced at him then turned his attentions back to the mouth of the hangar. "Oh, aye, everything's fine. Gloin and Bombur are just checking the perimeter and the others are scouting out the rest of the area to make sure there aren't any surprises waiting for us to fall asleep."
"Oh." Bilbo blinked and nodded. That made a lot of sense. "Right, then. Is there anything I should be doing?" He wasn't entirely sure that he'd be of much use to anyone, but he did want to offer to help, at least. He was willing to work and a quick study.
Oin shook his head, though, and leaned against the front of one of the transports, arms crossed. "Nah, best just to get comfortable and let the lads do what they do best. They'll send word if anything goes awry."
Bilbo nodded and, after a moment, leaned against the same vehicle as Oin. When abroad, do as the natives do.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"Oi, Bert!"
Bert jerked awake with a snarl. "Wasn't sleepin'!"
Tom nodded quickly. "I know that, Bert, you'd never sleep on the job."
Bert narrowed his eyes at Tom for a minute before he relaxed and nodded as well. "That's right. It's not my fault the higher-ups can't tell the difference between a man sleepin' and one who's thinkin' hard." He gave a wounded sniff and stretched before he turned to Tom again. "Well, what is it you're wanting, anyway?"
Tom blinked and frowned. He looked at the consol he'd been sitting at and then smiled again. "Oh! That's right! Got something odd happening down at the southern hangar."
Bert stood and took a moment to grimace while his joints cracked and popped before he made his way over to Tom's station. "What's this now?"
"There's something odd happening. I mean, look at all them people." Tom tapped one of the screens. "I don't think any of them are supposed to be poking about in there."
"Oi! What are you lot jawing on about?" William leaned against the frame of the door, shirt untucked and sneer firmly in place. "A fellow can't sleep with all the racket you two are making."
Bert whipped around to glare at William.
He and William were about the same build, but William was taller - just barely but he was. Bert outranked William, though, and while William might not be afraid of Bert, he sure as hell was afraid of Rook, who outranked all three of them. It was Rook who'd sent them out to this Valar-forsaken forest pit and it was Rook who'd put Bert in charge. That meant William could listen to Bert and be respectful or he could explain to the unit medic why Rook had turned all his insides into outsides.
William narrowed his eyes right back, but he hadn't said anything rude, so there wasn't anything Bert could do about it.
Bert motioned to the screen Tom had tapped. "Tom found some intruders poking around where they ain't supposed to."
William frowned and moved up to look at the screen over Tom's shoulder. "They got permission?"
"No, they're intruders - ain't no one gave them permission for anything." Bert scratched at his chin. "Let's just watch them a bit and see what they get up to, yeah? Oi, you think you can get the audio working in that area? Maybe move some of the cameras a bit for a better angle?"
"Don't matter how much he pivots them cameras - most of where they're settin' up is gonna be blocked by the crap that's just sittin around in there." William gestured at the screen. "Like that turret, there. Can't move the camera around that."
Tom frowned and looked at the terminal, trying to remember which buttons went to what. "No no, I think I might be able to move the machines, too." He pushed a button, and while it didn't move the turret that blocked the screen that William had pointed to, it did make seeing from a different camera easier. "See? I can control most of the turrets and some of the machines from here. Most of them aren't in half as bad shape as they look, you know. Could probably salvage at least half of this stuff, if we could get a few replacement parts in and -"
"Shut it." Bert was grinning when he said it, though, so Tom knew he didn't mean to be rude. "I want those microphones online and lets get all the cameras we have focused on this lot. Looks like we've finally got ourselves a bit of live entertainment!"
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"No, no - go ahead and add the juice, too."
Bilbo fished his com out of his ear and tucked it into a coat pocket with a frown. He looked down at the juice that remained at the bottom of the can before he raised an eyebrow at Bombur. "Wouldn't it be better to just add stock instead? Or bouillon?"
Bombur shook his head. "We don't have any to add."
Bilbo startled. He was sure he was gaping, but couldn't bring himself to care. "No bullion? I can understand not bringing stock, with all that liquid weight it would get heavy fast, but no bouillon?" How could someone not bring bouillon on what was sure to be such a long journey?
Bombur didn't seem to be offended, though. "It still takes up space and it's not necessary - not really." Bilbo knew he was making a face, now, because Bombur laughed. "It does. It doesn't weigh much, but it takes up space that could be used to bring other things, more useful things - like bullets."
Bilbo blinked and nodded, but wasn't entirely sure he agreed. Bullets instead of bouillon, indeed! Still, he wasn't the one experienced in living on the road so he told himself it was best to take Bombur's word on it.
He rubbed at the ear he'd had his com in and poured the can-juice into the pot, struggling to come up with a change in conversation. "So, uh, where exactly are we, anyway? Do we have to worry about anyone getting upset with us trespassing?"
Bombur chuckled and shook his head. "Oh, my, no. We're safe here, or near enough." He opened a bag of what looked to be dried mushrooms and added them into the pot while he had Bilbo stir. "No, these are the Trollshaws. We're in what used to be a territory called Rhudaur - we've been traveling through it for a good part of the day, actually. This base, from what we can gather, was built toward the end of the Great War - used to house weapons and machinery near the front lines of some battle or other. The front lines were pushed back, though, and Rhudaur - could you pass me the dried onions? No, the other bag - yes, thank you! Anyway, the front lines were pushed further and further back and Rhudaur started suffering heavy damage. By the time the Great War was over, not enough of the territory had survived for anyone to remember a small, out of the way base like this one. Most of the equipment here hasn't been moved or touched in over a hundred years!" Bombur smiled and gazed at the ruins that surrounded them, a fond look in his eyes. "Mostly what the rest are looking for is vagrants or signs that other folk are already occupying other parts of the compound." He tasted the stew and nodded to himself before shrugging at Bilbo. "We have more to fear from the roof falling in than anyone attacking us, usually, and Bofur's already declared the structure sturdy enough to last us through tonight."
Bilbo nodded, entranced. "So, if the base was forgotten, then how do you know to call it the Trollshaws?"
Bombur laughed. "That's just our pet name for it. Bifur found the place near a decade or so ago. Said it was set deep in the woods, but that there were these clumps of oddly shaped rocks scattered about the place." He gave the pot another stir and then set the ladle aside. "They looked like some sort of large, humanoid folk that'd been petrified, he'd said, and sure enough, they did! We got to joking about trolls caught in the sunlight and it wasn't long after that that this place was called the Trollshaws." He shared a grin with Bilbo. "The younger ones especially love the name."
Bilbo chuckled. "I bet they did!"
The pair sat back and chatted while they let the stew simmer. Biblo was delighted to have some insight into the history of the area and Bombur seemed happy to share what he knew. By the time the stew was about ready to serve, Thorin and the rest of the group had returned with the news that the company had the ruins to themselves.
The stew was served up in simple metal bowls and while Bilbo could've named a half dozen different odds and ends he'd have liked to add to it, no one else voiced any complaints so he kept his thoughts to himself.
Bilbo had just tucked into his meal, paying half a mind to the descriptions Fili and Kili were giving Ori about the area beyond the hangar, when Thorin's vid com began to chime. The lads all quieted momentarily before sharing a knowing grin and Gloin seemed to laugh at Thorin, but no one else paid it any mind.
Bilbo observed as Thorin answered the vidcom with a wince and a sigh. He happened to catch Bilbo watching him as he spoke with the person on the other end of the line and Bilbo wasn't sure how he felt as he saw a mischievous glint appear in the other man's eyes. He was quite sure it wasn't a good thing once Thorin began to make his way toward Bilbo, and even more so when Thorin shoved the vid com at him.
"It's for you," Thorin kept his voice low, wearing a near-smirk. "Best not to keep her waiting."
And just like that, Bilbo found himself with plenty of elbow room.
Fili and Kili were now sitting outside the hangar, perched on the hoods of the vehicles with their meals in hand, chatting away with Ori, and the rest of the company was suddenly preoccupied with laying out bedrolls or scavenging the nearby machinery for spare parts - Nori and Dwalin were even making their way to the top of a pile of scrap that Bilbo was sure couldn't be stable.
"Hello? Hello?! Thorin Durinson, are you still there? If you don't answer me, I swear, by the Maker, I will shave -"
Bilbo's eyes widened and he hastily brought himself into camera view and activated the video feed. "Um, no, no! No shaving, please!" The video feed took a moment to stabilize, but it wasn't even another moment before he realized who he was speaking to. "Dis!"
"Bilbo?!" Dis looked a bit leaner than she did the last time Bilbo had seen her, but she looked healthier overall and every bit as fair as he recalled. "What are you doing there?! Where's Thorin?!"
Bilbo glanced about, but couldn't catch sight of his appointed leader. "Um, I'm with the lads, uh, doing the thing..." How much was he allowed to say about the mission? Was this even a secure line? "You know, the usual. I'm not sure where Thorin is, at the moment, but he's, uh, not in sight just now."
"You poor thing!" Dis offered him a sympathetic smile. "It's okay to talk, just don't mention anything too specific, especially about location." Her grin grew then as her eyes moved over him. "Still, it's been an age since we last spoke! Why didn't you ever call me?"
"Ah! None of that, now!" Bilbo gave her a stern look. "You could've called just as easily."
"That's true, I suppose." Dis had the grace to look abashed for a moment or two before her grin returned. "How are you, though? I see my brother has managed to talk you into coming along. Are you doing okay? Are my boys behaving?"
Bilbo laughed. "Oh, it's good to see you!" He was surprised at how glad he was to have the chance to speak with someone familiar. He glanced around the area and saw a path that seemed to lead out of the way. "I'll fill you in on everything, but let me find somewhere with fewer ears."
She agreed, voice full of mirth, and Bilbo began to make his way away from the rest of the group.
"Don't go far!" Dori called out.
"Keep your com with you!" Bofur added.
Bilbo patted his breast pocket absently, ensuring the small torture device was still safe, before he nodded and waved his assurances to his new friends. He waited until he couldn't hear any of them conversing before he slowed his pace and returned his attentions to the the vid com again.
"So, what's happened?" Dis's eyes sparkled with mischief. "If Thorin didn't want to discuss it with me himself, it has to be something terrible!"
Bilbo didn't fight his grin. "What do you know about the Sharly incident?"
Dis' eyes widened. "The what incident?"
"Oh my, this will take a moment to tell." Bilbo shook his head. "Well, it started not long after we got settled in Bree..."
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"Oh, he's a sick bastard, he is."
"What? Which one?" William squinted at the monitors and frowned.
Tom let out an exasperated sigh and flicked his finger at the screen he was watching. "Slim Jim. He's a sick fuck." William nodded even as he looked over. William was decent enough. He was stupider than a sack of rocks, but at least he knew who his betters were. Not like Bert. "Look at him picking at his toe nails with that knife!"
"And what's wrong with that?" William's disgusted head shaking paused as Bert spoke up. "I seen you clean out your fingernails with your knife plenty of times."
Tom scowled. Never mind that they were all technically the same rank - give that man a new title and suddenly he was too good for the rest of them.
"Well, that was my fingers, wasn't it?" He scoffed. "A man keeps his hands clean - he knows where they've been. Feet are naturally filthy. What's he gonna use to cut up his food now? How's he gonna clean up that knife to use it for field work? The answer is he can't and if he does he's an animal."
William nodded again, but Bert just rolled his eyes.
"Hey, where'd Beef Jerky go?"
Tom looked back to the screen.
"We've got Bon bon, Grumbles and Gramps over by the fire." William pointed to one screen, then to another. "Giggles is over by the trucks with Mom and Dad and Gizmo and Gizmo Jr are over by that all terrain tank messing with the wires. Then we have Milly and Vanilly over here, just out of everyone's sight - they're getting up to something, I tell you. Slim Jim is sittin' up on the reinforced bus pickin' at his toes, but where's his boyfriend?"
"He's up here, talking to Pretty Boy. Besides," Bert frowned. "Beef Jerky and Slim Jim aren't together."
William scratched at his head. "But I thought they were. A man just doesn't go grabbing on another man like that unless they're being all intimate."
Tom blinked. That was a big word for William.
"You go through enough battles with someone and nothing is sacred," Bert scoffed. "Look at how close Beef Jerky and Pretty Boy are sitting together? See the way they look at each other? If anyone is together with anyone in this unit, then it's going to be Beef Jerky and Pretty Boy."
Tom laughed. "No, it's even better - Beef Jerky is fucking both of them and they don't know it."
Bert made a nasty face. "That's not even possible. You can't sneeze in a unit that size and not have everyone knowing all the particulars."
"Not if you're not willing to put in the effort, you can't." Tom offered him a nasty grin. "But with the right set up and the proper motivation -"
"But what about Milly and Vanilly?"
Bert and Tom both looked blankly at William.
"What about them?" Bert asked.
"Well, you mentioned that if anyone was together with anyone it was Pretty Boy and Beef Jerky, but I think that Milly and Vanilly are both chasing after Gizmo Jr."
Bert shook his head. "No, no - Dilly and Billy might be interested in Jr, but there's no way Mom would allow that. Have you seen how often he checks on where Jr is? Entirely too paranoid about that lad. Besides, two lads chase after the same ass? There's no way Pretty Boy would allow that - the moment it gets ugly, the whole unit is compromised."
"First of all, their nicknames are Willy and Nilly." Tom spoke up. "Second, you both have it wrong. Willy and Nilly are both going after Jr - together." He paused to watch their confusion. "Isn't it obvious? Those two have no sense of personal space with each other and it doesn't look like they've been more than ten feet away from each other since they got here. They even went together to take a piss! They're working together to catch Jr - they're going to share him."
"What?!" Bert's face was caught between shock and outrage. "What kind of pervert are you that you come up with this sort of shit? And we already decided that those two were Dilly and Billy."
"Dilly and Billy is stupid. Willy and Nilly are much better names." Tom insisted. Bert was grinding on his last nerve.
"I like Milly and Vanilly," William spoke up. "Sir."
"Milly and Vanilly is idiotic," Tom snarled. "The only thing stupider is Dilly and Billy! What kind of nicknames are you two coming up with? And it's perfectly natural for three or more people to have a relationship, you bigot!"
"As long as everyone's okay with it," William nodded his agreement. "Otherwise it's just cheating, like Beef Jerky."
Bert stared at William for a moment, disbelief all over his face, before muttering something about perverts and morons. "Fine, we'll settle this. Pull up their files. There has to be something about interpersonal relationships in their files."
William shook his head. "Can't. It's not done processing yet."
Bert blinked. "Say that again?"
William looked over at a smaller screen and tapped a few keys, then shrugged at Bert. "Says it's not done processing. The facial recognition hasn't come up with anything yet."
Tom started laughing.
Bert glared at him, but turned back to William. "Why didn't you say anything about this before?"
William scratched at the back of his head. "The computers are old as dirt and some of the cameras don't focus well. I didn't think anything was wrong."
"Well, you thought wrong," Bert snapped. "Fuck, you lot have been fussing over nicknames and who's with who when we could've been been listening for their names or where they're from or -"
Tom was up and in Bert's face before he could stop himself. "Don't you pull that fucking shit! You're the one arguing about who's name is what - getting your unders in a twist about who's fucking each other!"
"You better watch yourself," Bert snarled. "It'll only take one call to Rook -"
"That's right! Run back to Rook with your tail between your legs!" Tom felt a malicious grin curl his mouth. "How many blow jobs did it take to win his favor? Did you have to swallow? Or did he let you -"
"Oi! Thorin!"
The observation room got so quiet so fast that Tom's ears rang with the sudden lack of noise.
"Thorin! Get over here and give me a hand with pulling this camshaft loose!"
There was only one man in all of Middle Earth called Thorin. Everyone knew that.
Tom met William's eyes, then Bert's.
"Call Rook."
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"He didn't!" Dis managed to catch enough of her breath to gasp out the question.
"He did." Bilbo grinned to see her smiling, laughing - it made her look younger. "He seduced that woman, and possibly her lover - it depends on who you ask - into following him upstairs to the room where Nori was waiting and then the two of them, and I quote, 'severed the head of the snake," whatever that means." He shook his head and glanced briefly around the hall - there was a turn up ahead - to make sure he wasn't going to be tripping over anything. "I'm afraid I wasn't there for any of it myself, though, and I didn't have a com just then, so I have to take everyone else's word on the matter."
"Valar's mercy," she giggled. Then her expression changed and though her smile didn't dim any, her eyes glinted with a dangerous light. "I'll skin him alive, I think."
"That's terribly merciful of you, allowing him to live like that." He nodded his approval. Thorin, what Bilbo had seen of him so far, seemed like the sort of man that was always in control of his situation, almost untouchable, in a way. The idea of him hanging his head and scuffing his feet as his sister scolded him was an amusing one.
"I think so," Dis nodded imperiously. "I can't believe him! Allowing my boys to come into contact with that... that whore! And her delinquents!"
Bilbo laughed softly. "He certainly is a quick thinker, though, to come up with a maneuver like that as quickly as he did - to communicate it to everyone well enough for everything to go as smoothly as it did." He hesitated. "That could've gone terribly wrong so quickly and I wouldn't have been the wiser."
Her expression softened. "They would have protected you, you know." He couldn't name the expression she was wearing now, only that it was soft. "Besides, half of the maneuvers he uses he learned from from his men."
"And the other half?"
Dis looked away from the screen and her smile became rueful. "Gyda, Gyda Fundinson."
Bilbo startled, but kept his silence.
"Youngest of the Fundinson children and my best friend, growing up. The Fundinsons are close to our family in general, as you can tell, but Thorin and Gyda... they were... especially close." Her voice faltered, but she cleared her throat. "She taught Thorin most of what he knows of trickery."
"Most?" Bilbo kept his voice to a gentle tease. His mind flashed to what he knew of Balin and Dwalin and wondered why this Gyda had never been mentioned before.
"Well, Frerin and I were able to teach him some, but he's thick headed. Only Gyda ever really seemed to have the patience to teach him anything meaningful."
Bilbo offered another smile as he followed the curve of the hall, but whatever he was about to say died on his lips.
Up ahead, spilling out from one of the endless doorways lining the hall he'd been strolling down, was a light. He wasn't entirely sure, but he thought he could hear voices, as well.
"Bilbo?" Dis' voice, barely above a whisper, startled Bilbo into releasing the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.
"I, uh," He glanced between the open doorway and his friend's image on the vidcom several times. "There's a light coming from the doorway up ahead." He was trying to keep his voice low and calm, but he couldn't help the nervous sweat he'd broken out in. Half the company had crawled over this base. The light - and voices - were probably nothing to worry about.
"Bilbo? Bilbo, look at me."
Bilbo looked down at the vid com again and was so grateful for the reassuring look on Dis' face.
"Are there people up ahead?"
He nodded. "I think so." He moved so that he was leaning against the same wall as the door was in and tried to calm his racing heart. "Should I... should I go back?"
Dis opened her mouth to say something, but one of the voices chose that particular moment to speak up. "Thorin Durinson! Is that enough of an emergency to bother the captain?!"
Bilbo closed his eyes and took a shaky breath. When he looked back at the vid-com, Dis' eyes were wide and her mouth was shut again. "Look," he spoke softly. "I'm just going to... I'm going to move closer and try to figure out what's going on."
The look in Dis' eyes was close to panic, but she didn't try to dissuade him. "Keep the link open and don't be a hero, okay?"
Bilbo nodded and inched his way closer to the door.
"Damnit, Rook - you can skin the three of us and nail our hides to your door later! We have Durinson here!"
There was another voice, loud and angry, but garbled by what had to be a horrible connection.
"Well, no, the damn facial recognition hasn't I.D.'d him yet, but it's been running for the last half hour and hasn't found anything on any of these mongrels. The tech out here is from the first age, but it's not that slow!"
The angry voice spoke more, but seemed less upset this time.
"Can we mess with 'em a bit?" That was a new voice and there was an eager note to it that Bilbo didn't like at all. "Not Durinson, of course, but the others? Some of the equipment still works a bit and I just thought -"
The garbled voice interrupted the new voice with what was either a reprimand or a warning, judging by the tone, and then the first voice spoke again. "We'll patch through what video we've collected so far and make sure they don't have the chance to run, but I know this is Durinson."
The other voice snarled something else and then it got quiet. Bilbo had reached the door frame by this time and had been debating peeking around the edge of it to try to get an idea of what they were dealing with. He had leaned forward just far enough to get a flash of an image before a board under his foot creaked and he yanked himself away from the opening fast enough to set off a vicious twinge in his neck.
"What was that?"
There was a long pause, in which Bilbo slapped one hand over his mouth to keep from making any other sounds and the other clung to the vid com to ensure he wouldn't drop it.
"Just the rats, prob'ly. William - you get to work on patching Rook through on the feeds. Bert? You help me figure out just how much give these turrets will actually have."
There was the sound of movement and repositioning before the eager voice spoke again. "Alright, let's see what color blood these vermin have!"
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Kili sat on his bedroll, his cleaning kit in his lap and his pistol laid out in pieces on the ground before him. He was grinning so hard his cheeks were beginning to hurt and a quick glance told him that Fili - flanking Ori's other side - was still smiling, too.
It was still hard to believe that Uncle had taken them along on the sweep, but Kili certainly wasn't going to question his motives. The place was huge, with hundreds of rooms and so much equipment - still useful - that had been left for scrap that he couldn't blame Bifur and the Kafursons for keeping such a treasure to themselves. It was like an investment - somewhere safe to hide if they needed to lay low and a guaranteed source of income if they couldn't find anything else.
He reached across Ori to take the gun oil from his brother and blinked when his friend barely shifted.
He shared a look with Fili, who had noticed the distracted state Ori was in as well.
Fili only tilted his head, glanced at the monitor of the portable and shrugged.
Kili nodded. Ori did tend to get caught up in his work.
Still, it wouldn't do to let the technophile go thinking that he could just ignore them like that, so he "accidently" bumped into Ori's arm - just enough to make sure his presence was acknowledged.
Ori cussed and blinked and spared an irritated glance for Kili, who beamed at the attention. He frowned when Ori only turned back to his portable - with a muttered curse about flags - and flinched when a burst of static hit his com.
He fished his com out and rubbed at his injured ear while listening to his brother's huffing laugh. He replaced the com again and gave Ori a cautious look. If his friend's work was that important, Kili would just leave him to it, then.
Kili turned to give his attention back to his dissembled pistol - mulling over whether he wanted to clean the bits and pieces Dwalin's way or Gloin's way today - when a bit of movement from the corner of his eye caught his attention.
Kili tilted his head and watched as a gun turret, perched on a decrepit bit of tank that would never move under its own power again, seemed to shift and change it's angle.
He glanced around at the other equipment and didn't see anything else moving, then glanced at Fili, who was already staring at the same machine that had caught his eye.
Kili made a low noise in his throat and waited for Fili to make a similar sound before he spoke. "Did that little mechanized bit up there just move?"
Fili's eyes narrowed and he repeated the sound he'd made before. They both watched as first one machine gun, then another, moved and readjusted in small increments until each one was focused on the area the Company had set up camp in. None were targeting any member of the Company directly - yet - but it was still worrisome.
Kili met Fili's eyes over Ori's hunched, typing form and knew that if they were going to warn everyone then they had to at least keep up the charade of not knowing what was going on. So Kili looked back down at his dissembled pistol, trying not to rush as he cleaned the pieces and reassembled it, and as he did, Fili started to whistle. Kili took up the tune after a moment, as well, and while an outsider wouldn't have noticed the pause each member of the company gave before joining in on the seemingly impromptu tune, Kili took notice.
Kili only faltered in his whistling when he saw another old weapon, a submachine gun, turn to point directly at him, Ori and Fili.
Ori, of course, chose that particular moment to come out of his typing frenzy. "Oh, fuckle sauce -"
But then Fili knocked Ori into Kili and there wasn't even enough time to catch his breath before the air around them was consumed in a roaring blast.
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Bilbo sat just outside the door to where three monsters were firing at his friends and struggled to think of what he could do to make them stop. He'd only had one glance at the room, but he didn't think there was another door leading out. He didn't have any weapons - or any skill, even if he had weapons - and all three of the thugs in there were probably armed and were definitely big enough to beat him easily in hand to hand.
"Bilbo Baggins," Dis' eyes were wide and her jaw trembled but her voice was steady even as she kept her volume low. "Those are my boys down there. I know that you're not trained for this, but they're relying on you to help them. Are you with me? Are you okay?"
Bilbo nodded. "Yes, yes, I know." He grit his teeth and tried to measure his breathing. "I know, I just... I don't know what to do. I don't have any weapons on me and I don't know what to do."
Explosions and the sounds of bullets impacting on metal continued to pour out from the room. Between the low quality of the speakers and the way the men inside were laughing and cheering, it would've been easy for Bilbo to believe that they were just watching a vid-novel or playing a battle simulation, but knowing that those sounds meant his friends were under attack - it was almost enough to make him nauseous.
"Okay, that's fine. We'll figure out something," Dis spoke again and Bilbo wasn't sure who she was trying to reassure. "You're on Thorin's vid-com - is there any way you can search it to see if he has any video files about this place?"
Bilbo nodded again, almost weak with relief at having something to do. He minimized the conference window and tried to explore the other files on the device, but realized quickly that his efforts were useless.
"I don't understand the language he has everything written in."
He pulled the conference window up in time to see Dis curse and shake her head. "It's code, in case he's ever captured." She closed her eyes and brought her hands up to her mouth.
Bilbo was tempted to shut his own eyes again, but wasn't sure he could afford to. If he just had someone he could ask for help. Dis was on the vid com with him, but she didn't know where he was, couldn't offer much in the way of advice. If he had someone who knew of the place, someone he could call on the vid com...
He slapped his hand over his mouth to keep himself from shouting with relief. "Gandalf," He grinned, whispering to Dis, even as he started input the code to contact the old man directly. "If anyone can help us, it's Gandalf."
As he inputted the last digit of the code, he prayed that he was right
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Ori gasped for breath and tried to clutch at his arm.
"Foxhound Alpha and Bravo here, Pronto's with us but he's been hit, over."
He heard the words over the com, but they came from next to him, as well. Everything was so loud. They were under attack and the sound of metal on metal was so thunderous that the only thing keeping it from becoming overwhelming was the fire that was trying to consume his upper arm.
"Repeat, Alpha, Bravo and Pronto accounted for, and one with a flesh wound. Currently pinned with no chance for relocation, over."
Ori focused on breathing and not crying out. His portable. He had to find his portable, but Fili was holding him down while sparks rained down around them.
"Roger that. Who else is injured, over?" Thorin's voice - hard to hear over all the gunfire.
"Prophet present. I've been hit by some shrapnel, but nothing to fuss over." That was Dori. He sounded... off. His voice was too tight. Did he just say he'd been hit?
"Overlord, here. Under heavy fire, but safe so far." Balin's voice. "Does anyone have eyes on the enemy?"
Ori had been on his portable before the attack. It had taken him entirely too long to notice all the red flags that had been raised - to see all the warnings that had been sent to him about someone trying to ID their faces, their voices. He'd been trying to trace the source of the ID request when he'd been hit. Someone knew where they were, the enemy knew where they were and and then he'd been hit -
"Confirmed," Gloin's voice called out. "Shelldrake and Starlight present and uninjured, but stuck in a Valar damned tank! Someone's got remote control over all those weapons we didn't care about leaving lyin' all over the place!"
Somewhere there was a loud sound - too loud, like a roar or a crash - and then the whole place was flooded with clouds of dust and smoke and Ori started coughing.
"If you're fussing about being out of the worst of the weather, then I'll trade cover with you." Dwalin was laughing. "It's almost loud enough in here to be a party at Napalm's place!"
The coughing jarred Ori's arm and the fire in it blazed hot enough to steal his breath away. He wanted to curl up over it, but Fili was still leaning over him, wouldn't move even when Ori tried to wriggle free. He felt someone shifting closer to him and there was a hand on his hair briefly, on his face - a wet hand - he thought he heard Kili's voice, but it was hard to hear, hard to know anything and why wasn't Fili letting him up?
"Napalm and Minor, no injuries to report." Nori. That was Nori's voice. Nori was okay. "I bet Sharly's looking pretty tame compared this this, eh Major?"
"Fuck you," Thorin wasn't really mad. He was ... was he scared? He wasn't mad... "Someone get eyes on Boxwood!"
"I can't see shit!" Kili was angry.
Ori whimpered. Kili's voice was in his ear, but next to him, as well, and Ori didn't know which was real and his head was pounding now and his fingers were starting to tingle.
"Shoemaker, here." Shoemaker - that was Bombur's handle. But the voice - that was Bifur's voice, wasn't it? Was Bifur using Bofur... Bombur's handle? "I have Bluebell and Holdfast with me. I think Holdfast might be able to override this tank..."
"Well, hurry up! I'm about to be swiss cheese!" Nori's voice was sharp, like his knives.
There was a brief whistle in the air and then something exploded near by. Ori heard small bits of something rain around them but he couldn't feel anything. He knew Fili needed to take cover or he'd get injured, too, but the thought was too far away - he couldn't figure out how to get it to his mouth.
"There must be a central control somewhere!" Dori's voice was so strained.
Ori wanted to tell his oldest brother that it was okay, that he was okay and Oin would fix them all up in a moment, but he couldn't reach his com.
"I'm sure there is but it's not like any of us can just stroll down the hall to reach it right now, is it?!" Nori's voice was so hateful. Why was he always so mean to Dori? Why couldn't they just -
"Fuck, Holdfast's been hit!" Bifur's voice again, maybe. "Looks like a through and through."
"No, I'm fine! I'm fine! I've nearly got it... Ha! Let's light 'em up!"
The sound of heavy artillery rounds against heavy steel was suddenly louder and Kili was snarling into the coms again. "Easy with that thing, we're right here!"
Ori closed his eyes tighter and clenched his teeth against a scream that was building in his throat. Thorin and the others - they would figure out how to stop this. Any minute now, all the noise would stop and Oin would fix everyone up and they'd find somewhere safe and they'd all be okay. He just had to hold on a little longer.
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"The door to the armory should be just ahead, now, my boy."
Bilbo nodded, his eyes scanning the hallway for any signs of movement other than from himself. Gandalf had assured him that the only people present in the base were himself, the company, and the three guys in the room he'd left behind. Gandalf had access - somehow - to something that let him know these things and Bilbo trusted him, but he couldn't seem to make himself stop searching for other people, for more of the enemy.
He reached the door without running into trouble and, in a blur of nerves and coaching from Dis and Gandalf both, managed to force his way into the room.
Once inside, he froze. For a long moment all he saw was metal - bits and pieces of various bits of metal of all different shapes and sizes - but he was startled out of his daze when he realized that Dis was calling his name again.
"I'm sorry." He tried to take a steadying breath but didn't feel much steadier for it.
Dis, only taking up half the screen now, searched his face for something before she relaxed a bit and nodded. Gandalf only smiled in the same way he always did when he was worried but wanted to be reassuring.
"What - what should I grab? What do I look for?"
"Grenades." There was an edge to Dis' voice that startled Bilbo, and a glint to her eyes that could've been called feral. "You don't have the training for anything else right now, so this will be the easiest and the safest thing for you to use. You'll just pull the pin, toss it in and run for cover. It will eliminate both the men and the machines they're using to hurt my boys."
Bilbo found himself nodding even as he felt himself break out in a cold sweat. He was going to have to kill them, to kill people. He could do it - he was going to have to at some point, he knew that, but he didn't think he'd have to so soon and he wasn't sure he was ready to -
Gandalf cleared his throat. "Look for the grenades, there should be some designed to stun in the same area."
Bilbo blinked and nodded, too relieved for words.
"Flash bangs?! You think these monsters will be brought down with a simple flash bang?" Dis was angry, but she was directing it at Gandalf, allowing Bilbo to search for his weapons.
He nearly cheered when he found what he thought were the right ones, interrupting the argument they'd been having to double check that he was right.
"Yes, those are the ones," Gandalf nodded and Dis confirmed it with a nod as well.
He was back down the hall an in position almost before he knew he was moving.
"You'll want to get the door closed," Dis was whispering just loud enough to be heard. "To have the best chance of knocking them out, rather than just stunning them, you'll want to pull the pin, toss it in and shut the door as fast as you can. That will protect you from the effects, too."
Bilbo nodded and set down the vid com gently. He reached into the pockets he had hastily filled and pulled out all four - what had Dis called them? - flashbangs.
He licked his lips and slid down the wall to where he could see - and be seen by - the vid com. "How many do I use?"
Dis' eyes were glinting again. "How many do you have?"
Gandalf cleared his throat again. "I'd not use more than two. And be sure you're ready to move before you pull those pin, my boy, do you understand?"
Bilbo nodded and tried to swallow, despite how dry his throat was. This wouldn't kill them, he reminded himself. This was non-lethal and would only stun them, knock them out and then he could go into the room and stop the machines.
After moving three unconscious bodies out of the way.
Bilbo blinked. "What do I... what do I do with them? How long are they going to be... asleep?"
Dis had pity on him. "You throw two of those in there, they'll be out for a good while. Long enough for you to stop the weapons and for Thorin and the rest to come and deal with them. All you have to do is make sure you can access the controls - otherwise, just ignore them."
Bilbo nodded again. He could do that. That didn't sound too hard.
He moved away from the vid com, so that he was standing next to the door frame, and took a breath.
He eyed the door knob, trying to work out if it would be better to lunge for the thing or just calmly reach for it, and took another breath.
Bilbo held the two flashbangs - awkwardly - in one hand and gripped their pins in the other and took another breath.
And held it.
He felt distant from himself - as if he were watching himself pull the pins of both grenades in one fluid motion - as if he were watching himself step around the door frame, flinging the weapons into the room even as his free hand reached for the doorknob.
The door was closing even before the men inside realized that anything had been thrown at them.
Bilbo slammed the door shut, then lunged to where he left the vid com and covered his ears.
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The sudden absence of noise was startling and unnerved Fili in a way that all the chaos and danger of being attacked hadn't.
His own injuries were minor - he'd taken shrapnel damage to his back and his legs, some to his left arm, but it wasn't as bad as being shot, or it wouldn't be until the wounds were cleaning out. Near as he could tell, Kili had gotten away with the same, but at least poor Ori, who still cringed and half-struggled under him, hadn't gotten any further injured. Kili was still stroking his face, not daring to even whisper. Fili held his position and panted - heart pounding with adrenaline still - refusing to let his best friend up until he heard the call for all clear.
The silence stretched on, punctuated from time to time by something falling or crashing elsewhere in the hangar. Gradually, Ori began to calm too and Kili looked up enough to meet Fili's gaze, hope flickering in his eyes.
A burst of static and feedback got Fili's heart pounding again, but the voice, and the words it spoke, had Fili nearly trembling with relief.
"Is everyone alive down there?"
