Author's Notes: Valentines day! Hooray! (Actually, it's way past V Day. I'm lazy)
...
Just kidding, I'm single, so I'm gonna go cry now.
Anyway, enjoy Devastator's antics as he struggles to find out about this lovely holiday.
Why did the humans have to be so odd?
Surely, being on the wonderful island paradise of Diego Garcia, a handsome habitat dominated by lush blue ocean, and pure skies peppered with the gentle white of clouds, and handsome trees, proud and tall, scattered around the sandy beaches, and the glint of polished metal in the sunlight, was enough of itself to learn how to appreciated natural beauty.
But no, the humans saw fit to add the most disgusting decorations Devastator had ever seen in all of his centuries upon centuries of living.
Peppered throughout the metallic structures of bunkers and hangars and bases were long wrappings of tinsel of a most abominable shade of pink. Few things Devastator hates, but the colour pink and a particular shade of light green are two of them. And let's not forget the pink 'hearts' scattered around, the bi-circular pointed objects wrapped around by little ribbons, creating a most putrid effect that made Devastator wish he had the ability to purge his systems so he wouldn't feel as though sludge were caught in his Vortex Grinder. Why, oh why, did the humans put up these sickening pink heat things?...
The answer came to him in the form of a giggling Tatyana Witwicky, whom spoke to him in a high-pitched and awed voice, as a smiling Jazz stood nearby: "It's Valentines Day, Devastator! The day of love and joy for couples! The day of union and happiness and even more love! YAY!"
"I think he's got it, Tai. C'mon, let's go enjoy ourselves." Jazz purred, shifting into his sleek vehicle mode, which the laughing femme happily jumped into, and with a final wave to the rather stunned combiner, she drove away in her spark-mate, off for some lovely endeavour, no doubt.
So, the combiner looked up this 'Valentine's Day' and discovered this: Apparently, the day was held as a celebration for couples and relationships, regarded as a day of love and peace. Couples were expected to show love and dedication to one another through gifts and acts of the aforementioned love, and it also served as a day of self-contained relaxation for 'single' people. How odd, to have a day based on love, a mere emotion. On Cybertron, the sole holiday was the Allspark Commemoration Ceremony, rather then all the absurd notions that the humans had.
Nevertheless, Devastator decided that he should interact with this Valentine's Day, to learn a bit more about the human holidays and their meanings. Not only would the Prime be pleased by this interest in the human tradition, it also never hurt to try something new, the combiner figured. He could give reason to that statement, since his body was constantly in pain. Despite Ratchet's best efforts, the pain never seemed to go, though it was lessened slightly by the yellow mech's tampering, which was better then nothing at all.
The problem was, who could Devastator indulge in the holiday with? Valentine's Day specified couples engaging in shared activities of love and devotion, so that left the colossus with a problem; Whom to perform such activities with? Well, human culture generally favoured male-female activities (Though most human males had an odd obsession with female-female couplings), so the combiner figured that his best bet was to have one of the femme's help him.
Devastator listed off the femme's he knew of: Tatyana Witwicky, Arcee, Flareup and Chromia. Tai was off the list, since she was with the Apprentice, so that left the Triplets. However, Arcee was currently with Bumblebee, so that excluded her as well. And Devastator knew Chromia would rather perform the act of 'licking' upon Starscream's talons then indulge in a romantic-themed day with the titan.
So, that left Flareup.
Devastator snorted slightly at the irony of that choice. It was clear that Flareup was what the Internet defined as, fittingly enough, 'the village bicycle' a female whom partook in flirtatious, or perhaps sexual, activities with a good number of others, generally male but occasionally female as well. The combiner was more then aware of Flareup's rather flirty attitude; Sideswipe and Barricade often bragged about the smallest hints of flirts that the purple femme sent them, and the amount of times Jolt had suffered a stuttering virus in his vocal components when she flashed him a wink and a sly smile.
It was only fortunate that Arcee and Chromia did not have that attitude.
Nevertheless, Devastator knew that Flareup would help him, the kind femme she was. So, he went off to find her.
It wasn't hard; Valentine's Day had earned her respect, and she was currently wheeling after the large form of Breakaway, speaking happily of love and what-not. The jet seemed highly amused by the bike, preferring to speak back with flirts and purrs. The jet was easily the most amorous mech of the Autobots, and he reminded Devastator of the Decepticon, Grindor. That helicopter had a long history of female conquests, from seducing captive femmes, to picking up a duo or four at a Cybertronian bar.
Anyway, the combiner figured that if he wanted to learn more about Valentine's day from Flareup, he would have to remove the competition. So, he literally muscled in, a thick arm shoving the flyer away, earning a yelp of protest, and his massive head leaned down to face the purple bike, so much smaller then he was.
She mimicked the organic action of blinking in surprise at the combiner's sudden appearance, before grinning and stating: "Hi, Devastator! Happy Valentine's Day!"
Devastator nodded, and allowed the little Cybertronian to affectionately stroke his chin, before she spoke cheerfully: "Let me guess... considering what sweet Jolt did at Christmas for you, I assume you want me to teach you about Valentine's Day?"
The combiner nodded in confirmation, heaving a soft sigh at her gentle touch. Though some perceived this motorbike as 'ditzy', she could be remarkably perceptive sometimes.
The motorbike giggled as Devastator all but purred under her touch, the massive combiner being sure to keep an arm blocking off a grumbling Breakaway from engaging Flareup's attention, before she turned her voice to more important matters: "Alright, Devastator, the first thing of Valentine's Day is to be romantic. You have to show whomever you love and cherish exactly how you feel about them, whether by acts, speech or simple being. You need to let them understand that they really are what you need in life, the thing that keeps you going and happy, the one love you will always have. That is what Valentine's Day is all about. Just you, your partner and love all the way."
This talk coming from a flirt, but then, Devastator wasn't one to complain. This talk may prove to be enlightening and interesting. So, this day was to show love for a partner? How simple, yet effective.
Flareup giggled as the titan nodded in understanding, before stating: "Alright, one of the most basic parts of love is a kiss. A simple physical gesture, if you remember at last Christmas, but to some, it can be so much more. Why don't you try it?"
Ah yes, kissing. A typically organic act of placing the oral sensors, known as lips, together in a passionate gesture. Cybertronians had mimicked the action for millennia, so Devastator knew how to perform one. So, he shrugged and leaned in.
It was only now Flareup remembered something.
"Oh crap, wait, stop!-"
Breakaway, still trying to fight past Devastator's arm to continue talking to Flareup, noted what happened and burst into laughter. Like with Arcee, Devastator had accidentally swallowed the bike, her single leg flailing about on his jaws, the rest of her within the huge maw. The combiner rolled his optics at his mistake, before spitting out the femme, being sure to rumble an apology to her, which she accepted as she, slightly shocked and dazed, got back to her leg.
Well, since the kiss had accomplished nothing (Except of course nearly swallowing a fellow Autobot) Devastator decided to ask his Master about this day, while the femme recovered from being 'kissed' by a being nearly a hundred times her size. With that, the combiner linked to his Master and asked:
'Great Prime.'
"Ah, Devastator. What is it?" His Master asked, slightly surprised that the combiner was contacting him when there were no jobs for the colossus.
'The femme, Flareup, is aiding me in learning about the human Valentine's Day. I merely wished to ask for your input, Master.'
"Ah, I see." Optimus replied, chuckling slightly. "I suppose you wish to know just why humans celebrate the emotion of love so much, and commemorate with a day of its own?"
'Yes, Master.'
"Very well. To humans, love is a sacred thing. It is an emotion that allows you to feel for others, to care for them, to understand them. Love is what gives you hope, motivation, and it is what lets you form a partnership stronger then any this Universe could ever fathom. However, love does not always give what is due, and it can hurt more then anything. That is a risk that you have to take with this powerful feeling. To have someone love you in return, or not. Such is the nature of this emotion. If it is true, then it is all you can ever need. If not, it can tear you down to nothing. But it is special nonetheless, an emotion more so then any other. To humans, love can influence lives and countries, and Valentine's Day is to celebrate this love."
The combiner remained silent after the Master's lengthy explanation, the truck knowing of Devastator's musing habits.
So, this love, an emotion Devastator has never felt nor cared for, was a powerful force within human society, something that could influence decisions and lives for better or for worse. It was definitely interesting, but overall, this day had little value to Devastator. He was a being of complete loyalty and servitude, not love and affection. Then again, he has much closer bonds to the Autobots then he had with the Decepticons, so perhaps there was some truth in the theme of this day.
"Is that helpful to you, Devastator? Or do you require another femme to eat?" The Master asked, and Devastator sensed the humour in the Prime's second statement, before the colossus replied:
'That is helpful, Master. I thank you for your wisdom. And I do not require sustenance in the form of a femme, Master.'
"Of course not." The Prime chuckled. "I shall see you later, Devastator. Try not to get into too much trouble."
'I obey.'
Thus, the combiner shut down his link and returned his attention to Flareup, whom was now telling off Breakaway for laughing at her predicament, the motorbike no longer dazed and disorientated, but currently rather annoyed by the jet's sense of humour.
So, Flareup and the Master had spoken of the same stuff, it seems. Love was powerful and respected enough to earn a holiday of its own. Interesting. But perhaps he should observe love in the flesh, so to speak.
So, the combiner decided to find young Tatyana and Jazz and see how they did it.
It was as easy as making a human food item called a pie to find the love-struck mates; Devastator could track the signal of an Apprentice and a Prime across the universe, never mind a small island, and he soon found the two upon the beach, the Apprentice in vehicle mode, and the Hybrid laying across the hood of the car, both of them clearly watching the beautiful ocean lapping at the beach, the sun lowering itself through the sky, as nightfall would be in three hours, creating a faint orange blur across the sky and sea. It was very beautiful.
Devastator turned his attention to the mates; They weren't doing anything. Simply relaxing on the beach and in each other's presence. Shouldn't they be more active when performing love rituals? Or maybe this relaxing thing was simply another part of the grand scheme of love. Enjoying each other's presence was a content thing, Devastator figured. He deduced that, after all, the best gift on this Valentine's Day was most likely the single attention and affection of the one you love.
The combiner mused on his own status as 'single'. Certainly, some beings on this island might wish for him to have a 'girlfriend', and admittedly, he was quite fond of the Triplets. But love wasn't for him. It never was. His duty, his loyalty, his power, was to the Prime and nothing else.
The Prime was everything.
But at least the Apprentice had love, and the Hybrid as well. They loved each other, and Devastator could hear murmurs of affection, trust and love between the two as they watched nature's beauty indulge their optics.
However, as Devastator lay down on the beach, green optics always watching the love-struck pair, he wondered if, maybe someday, the Prime could gift him with a love, a love all for himself, to truly understand that one glorious emotion. If the Prime commanded it, then Devastator could love it. Maybe someday.
"I cannot give you a love, so to speak, Devastator." The Prime messaged him, having been casually watching the combiner via their link, before continuing: "But I can give you some advice: Love comes in all forms. And right now, I think someone deserves a small love of gratitude from you."
There was a small smile in the Prime's voice, and Devastator sighed peacefully as he replied:
'I obey.'
Until that day, the day when he may find true love, he settled for now sending a small Valentine's message, as the Prime advised, to Flareup, in gratitude for her brief tutelage:
Some say roses are red.
Some say violets are blue.
I certainly believe, that even both together,
They cannot compare with you.
Happy Valentine's Day, from Devastator.
Author's Notes: Awww, he's such a sweetie.
However, don't get all excited for Devastator x Flareup. Remember, he only did it 'cause Prime recommended it. Or maybe he did want to...
That's all up to you, viewers ;)
Well, I have three requests to get working on: One for Omega Supreme arriving, one for Lightning-Fall's OC and one for... I'll keep number three a secret for now :P
Happy late Valentine's Day!
Ha, village bicycle. I'm such a genius XD
So, now, we have a survey: Who do you think Flareup would go best with?
Is it:
A: Jolt? (Referred to him as sweet)
B: Breakaway? (Followed him around, speaking of love)
C: Devastator? (Kissed him)
D: Sideswipe/ Barricade? (Flirted with them)
