Casey woke up first, and realized that it was still storming. She took a deep breath agains the anxiety that threatened to rise in her chest. Sometimes, the rain triggered all kinds of memories she didn't want it too. She lifted Hans arm from around her waist, and moved out of the bed slowly. She didn't wake him up, but she couldn't helping wince at the tenderness between her legs.

She moved into the kitchen with a soft sigh. She began making omeletts for both of them. The sun refused to shine into the kitchen, but she didn't mind the darkness so much. The pitter patter of the rain was slightly soothing as long as she wasn't near a car.

Han had brought her such a long way since the day he found her, and she would always be greatful, but she couldn't help wondering what would happen next. She wanted to improve her driving, and maybe travel back home to visit the graves of her family. Would Han go with her? She didn't know, but she could worry about it later.

She served the eggs onto plates, and carried them into his room.

"Han?" She called his name softly, and he say up rubbing his eyes.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"I brought breakfast." She said softly.

He smiled running a hand through his gorgeous hair. She wanted to run her fingers through it, but she handed him a plate instead then climbed into the bed with him.

"Breakfast in bed? I might just keep you." He teased.

They ate in a comfortable silence as the rain kept up outside. He finished breakfast first, and sat his plate on the floor falling back in the bed staring out the window.

"Is there a race tonight?" She asked.

"Supposed to be. I don't know how many people will come out in the rain." He said.

"Isn't it dangerous in the rain?" She asked.

"Nah, not if you know what you're doing." He said.

She bit her lip setting her fork down with a choked sob. He reacted quickly sitting up, and pulling her to him. She went willingly letting her head rest against his chest.

"I'm sorry." She sobbed.

"Don't be...it's okay." He said hugging her closer.

"I just miss them all so much. I can never forgive myself." She said.

"I know, but they wouldn't want you to blame yourself." He said kissing the top of her head.

"The rain, sometimes it reminds me of them." She said.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Sometimes...I think I heard Trevor calling my name when I'm out places, Sometimes...I get scared or sick, and I want to tell my mom." She sobbed harder.

"You're a strong, brave, beautiful girl. Your mom would be proud of you." He told her.

She sniffled, and he held her close until the sobs subsided, and she pulled away wiping her puffy eyes. He thought she never looked more beautiful. He reached up wiping his thumb across her cheek.

"Are you going to race tonight?" She asked.

"No." He said.

"Don't stay home because of me." She said.

"I'm not, I'm just content to stay in bed all day." He said leaning back into the bed.

"Really?" She asked.

"Of course. Want to join me?" He asked motioning her closer.

She bit her lip before leaning back, and wrapping her arms around his waist. He wrapped his arms around her. She smiled up at him, and he kissed her. It started out innocent enough a sweet gentle kiss, but soon she was pressing her body against his desperate for more.

His hands wound in her hair, and hers slid up his chest taking his shirt with it. He rolled over pinning her beneath him, and moving his free hand to the hem of her shirt. His fingers teased the skin on her stomach, and she squirmed against him. He pulled away first.

"Maybe, we shouldn't do this now." He said.

"Why?" She asked.

"It might hurt a little, you're still sore." He said kissing her gently.

"I'll be okay, I'm tougher than I look." She said kissing him, and pulling on his shirt until it was over his head, and her hands could rake up his bare back.

They spent the rest of the day in his bed, cuddling, listening to the rain, and making love. The only time either left was to get food or use the faicilities. Outside the rain threatened her existance, but in this aparment, in this bed with him she could almost believe she would be okay.


Over the next few weeks Casey found herself coming back to life. She laughed again, and had fun. Han teased her, and made her forget that she was afraid of life. He introduced her to other friends who would sometimes come for dinner. She went to the races, and he held her hand showing her off to everyone, as he raced she felt a thrill at the roar of the engine. She cleaned, and cooked daily as promise. Her nights were spent in his bed tangled in his sheets, wrapped in his arms, and when the nightmares haunted her he held her close, and kissed them away.

She got better at driivng, enough so that she would often take his car and go on runs. To the store or wherever she needed to go. The flashbacks, panic attacks, and anxiety melted away, and she learned to love the road again. It didn't occur to her what was changing until one night she was cooking dinner.

"I have a race tomorrow." Han said from his spot by the fridge sipping his beer.

"Okay, is it a big race?" She asked from her spot by the stove mixing dinner.

"Yeah it's the third annual one." He said.

"Oh? what date is tomorrow?" She asked.

"The eigth I think." he said with a shrug.

She froze her body going tense. He noticed the change immediately.

"Casey? Are you okay?" He asked.

"...Trevor..."She said softly.

"Trevor?" He was confused.

"It was his birthday...tomorrow...I forgot...I forgot him...how could I forget? I killed him." She said feeling the panic, and sorrow hit her harder than it had since the actual accident.

Han moved to hold her to his chest, and she gripped him trying to find some oxygen. In her happiness, and bliss she had forgotten about her family, that she had killed.

"Han...I have to go home." She said looking up at him.

"Now?" He asked.

"As soon as possible. I have to go...I have to see the graves, I have to...I can't forget them. "She said.

He dropped his arms, and backed away from her to lean against the counter. He took a drink of his beer, and she knew he was pulling away from her.

"You have to go. I know that." He said.

"But?" She asked chewing on her lower lip.

"I can't go with you." He said with a shrug.

"Why? You can Han...please..."She said.

"No, this is something you need to do on your own. This is your life now, and you need to decide how to live it. You can be anyone you want to be Casey, and this is how you start. I can't go with you, because it's your life." He said.

"You're a part of my life. Of who I am." She said.

"No, I care about you deeply, but...I can't keep you here. I'm all you've known you need ot go live, and find who you are." He said.

"I..."She started to speak, but didn't and he took a deep breath.

He knew what she was thinking. He knew what she was going to say, and he wanted to say it too, but he couldn't. This was her chance to really live, and he couldnt' deny her that not now. So he'd let her go, and pray that some day she came back.

"You have to go Casey." He said.

"I know." She said.

"One more night?" He asked reaching out a hand.

"One more night." She said putting her hand in his.

He pulled her close kissing her like she was the world, and she was ending. He held her like she was fragile, and made of glass, but she wasn't and she didn't break.


The next morning he leaned against the open door leading into her room, and watched her pack. Each thing that went into the suitcase reminded him of her. The blue shirt that he had taken off in the backseat of his car, the green socks that he always found tangled in his sheets.

She zipped her suitcase, and turned to face him. He offered her a casual smile, but she didn't return it. She moved closer, and wrapped her arms around his waist. He held her closer breathing in her shampoo.

"Thank you. For everything." She said. He kissed the top of her head.

"I have a going away present for you." He said.

"You didn't have to get me anything." She said pulling away.

He pulled the keys to the 350z out of his pocket dangling them infront of her. She shook her head, and backed away from him.

"No, Han I can't take that." She said.

"Yes, you can. I don't want you to travel by bus." He said pressing the keys into her hand.

"It's your race car." She said.

"I have others besides...we have history with that car, and I want you to remember me." He said.

"Are you sure?"She asked.

"I'm positive, and if you get lonely...you'll always have a home here." He said.

"I won't forget you ever..."She said tears filling her eyes.

He pulled her close, and kissed her one more time. She kissed him back, but he could taste her tears. When she pulled away he took a deep breath.

"Go, now." He said, and she nodded.

She gripped the keys in one hand, and her suitcase in the other. He turned, and watched her head for the door a small part of him hoping she'd change her mind, but knowing she needed to do this. It was time Casey found out who Casey was.

She opened the door, and took one last look back at him. He forced a smile, and she waved before stepping out, and closing the door behind her.

He knew this was for the best, and he knew she would be okay, but that didn't make his house less emtpy. It didn't make the pain less intense, and it didn't fight the loneliness. He sat down on her bed with a heavy sigh. Maybe, he needed her just as much as she needed him, and he just didn't know it until right now.


READ AND REVIEW! I have not given up on this fic it WILL get finished I promise. I've been busy with other fictions, but I'm trying to get this one finished for all the people who are reading it.