Rating: NC-17 (Language and sex)
Beta: Much love goes out to the awesome Jayceepat
Disclaimer: I do not own CSI or any of its characters.
A/N: As always thanks for your great reviews and thanks for reading. Now I told a lot of people there wouldn't be smut, and I really couldn't make up my mind and in the end I decided to give it a go so be warned there is sex in this chapter.
This is also the last chapter so I hope you all enjoy…
Chapter 12: Breathe Me
"Whats going on here Nick is me really wanting to have sex with you" Greg told him.
"Why?" Nick asked feeling very confused at the whole situation. "I mean aren't we just friends?"
"Nick, me and you have never been just friends" Greg said as he shifted uncomfortable. He was fully prepared to have sex, talking wasn't something he had expected. "Even before we got together. There has always been a tension and an attraction between us, I'm just acting on it."
"You make it sound really simple Greg, but we both know it's not" Nick said as he backed away a little, not trusting himself to be so close to Greg.
"Why not?" Greg asked with frustration as he ran his hand through his hair and sighed. "Why can't it for once be simple?"
"I'm not sure where your head is at Greg but I'm still in love with you. Very deeply in love with you and I can't just have sex with you for the sake of having sex. You mean too much to me" Nick said, his voice slightly pained. He looked away slightly embarrassed by his own declaration of love.
"That's really sweet" Greg said with a small laugh. "You'll fuck a wacko against a wall but you won't have sex with someone you love. You're a weird guy Nick Stokes."
The bitter tone in Greg's voice caused Nick to look up. He took a few steps towards Greg but stopped when he saw Greg step away. "It's not like that Greg. Ron was a huge mistake, but if I slept with you right now it would be a mistake as well. Because I know if we had sex I couldn't just go back to being your friend, I'd need to be with you again and I know that's not what you want."
"How do you know what I want?" Greg asked him.
"You made it pretty clear that all you want from me is friendship Greg" Nick replied.
"I told you I needed time, and you have given it to me" Greg replied as he looked up at Nick. He had always loved Nick, from the very first moment he saw him as cliché as it sounds. "I miss you."
"I really miss you as well" Nick replied. He wasn't sure if Greg meant the words he was saying but Nick really didn't care, he had been waiting for Greg to tell him that since the moment they broke up.
They both just stood there looking at each other; not sure of what to say or where to go from here. Greg took a few steps until he was right in-front of Nick and placed his hand on Nick's face. He gently leaned in and lightly brushed his lips against Nick's. It was a light kiss but it seemed right for the moment. "Can't we just be us again?"
"Are you sure that's what you want?" Nick asked him as he took Greg's hand into his own, just wanting to be close to him.
"It won't be easy and we still have a lot of stuff to work through. But I know I can't live without you anymore, it's too hard and it's not what I want. I want my life to be with you" Greg told him. Their faces were so close that they could feel the other one breathing.
"I want that as well" Nick told him with a smile. "But I think we should wait till we have sex again."
Greg laughed lightly, "What, you think I only want you for your body Stokes."
"I know you want more than that. I just think it should be special" Nick told him.
"You're such a girl" Greg laughed. "But I'll agree to the no sex rule."
"Greg… Are you sure this is really what you want?" Nick asked. He knew he had hurt Greg badly in the past and at the same time he also knew that Greg had been feeling suffocated in their relationship.
"I love you Nick" Greg told him before he lightly pecked his lips. "We'll work out the rest."
Nick was happy to be home after his long shift at the lab. The night seemed to move so slowly but Nick knew that was because he was eager to get back home to Greg. Greg had spent the day at Nick's talking. They talked about everything, all the problems they had the first time around, things they could do to make their relationship run smoother, anything and everything they could think of, they talked about. Nick had really enjoyed it and was disappointed when he realized he had to go to work. Greg had the night off so Nick told him to stay and sleep and he would see him when he got home. He had been surprised when Greg said yes but realized that Greg really was serious about them getting back together. A part of him had thought to begin with that it was just Greg's libido talking.
He walked into the house and took off his shoes. He smiled when he looked up and saw Greg going through his CD collection in nothing but purple boxer shorts. Greg looked over at him and smiled a smile that could only be descried as Greg and as sexy. Nick found himself getting semi-hard just looking at him. He tried to fight the urge to just go over there and jump on him; after all he had been the one who suggested that they wait to have sex. But then Greg started to sway his hips a little as he listened to one of Nick's CD's. "Country's not half bad sometimes" Greg said to him.
Nick couldn't help himself; he pushed Greg against the wall of the living room and leaned down to kiss Greg softly on the neck.
"What's gotten into you?" Greg asked with a soft voice, enjoying the feeling of Nick's lips against his skin. He had no idea why Nick had changed his mind but who was he to argue.
"You just looked so sexy, standing there in your purple boxers" Nick said as he kissed Greg lightly on the lips before pulling back and looking him in the eye. "I have to have you."
"Then have me you will" Greg said with a smirk as he pulled Nick even closer to him with the belt loops on his jeans; he felt Nick's cock pushing into he's thigh. "Someone's excited."
"I guess you just have that effect on me" Nick said as he took Greg's earlobe in his mouth and bit it lightly. Nick braced himself by placing his hands on the wall as he moved his mouth to Greg's and they kissed passionately. Their tongue's dueling for dominance, as Nick pushed himself into Greg's body more. Wanting Greg to feel how much he wanted him. Nick took one of his hands of the wall and placed it on Greg's chest brushing is thumb lightly across one of the small nipples as he did; in response Greg kissed him even deeper.
"Fuck I've missed this" Greg whispered when they finally had to break apart for air. Nick smiled at him as he ran his hand down lower unit it was sitting just above the waist line of Greg's boxers. He played with the fabric a little before sliding his hand inside and lightly running his fingers across Greg's large erection. "Shit, it's been to long."
"I know it has" Nick mumbled as his hand continued to lightly stroke Greg.
"I think we need to relocate" Greg whispered to him. He loved the feeling of having Nick touch him again but he didn't want to come until the main event.
"Right" Nick agreed as he stopped what he was doing and grabbed Greg by the hand to lead him into the bedroom.
Once they were in the bedroom Greg placed his hands on the hem of Nick's shirt and lifted it off the older man. Nick smiled when Greg threw the shirt to the side and never took his eyes off him. Greg placed both his hands on Nick's hard chest and ran his hands down it slowly. It had been too long since he had felt Nick's skin, he wanted to savor the way it felt. He placed his tongue on the center of Nick's chest and then slowly licked down following the same path his hands had just taken. His hands slid down Nick's sides as he dropped to his knees and was face to face with Nick's crotch. Greg looked up at Nick with a wicked smirk and slowly undid the button of his jeans; not breaking eye contact once as he unzipped and pulled down the jeans and boxers all in one go. Greg smiled at the sight of Nick's rock hard cock. He placed his hand on it and tugged lightly a few times before he placed his mouth on the tip and blew lightly.
"Jesus" Nick said as he placed his hands on Greg's shoulder to steady himself. It really had been too long.
Greg looked back up and smiled again before he took Nick's whole dick into his mouth and sucked eagerly. Nick moaned as he threw his head back and massaged Greg's shoulders with his hands.
"Fuck…" Nick said as Greg started to play with his balls while sucking him off. He ran his tongue along the vein then stopped sucking to lightly lick some pre-cum of the head before resuming the heavy suction with his mouth. It was driving Nick insane; He had to resist the urge to fuck his mouth. "Wait… Stop."
"What?" Greg said surprised as he looked up at Nick confused. Nick grabbed him and lifted him up so they were standing in front of each other closely. He placed his arms around Greg's waist and stepped back as well as he could with jeans around his ankles until he felt the bed hit the back of his legs.
"I want to be inside you" Nick told him in husky voice, his hard on was rubbing against Greg's hip because of how close he and Greg were. He somehow managed to get the jeans and boxers off his legs completely and slid onto the bed pulling Greg with him. "Now, how about we get these off you."
Greg smiled as Nick pulled his purple boxers off and looked at him naked for the first time in months. "See something you like Stokes?" Greg teased.
"I see someone I love" Nick told him as he kissed Greg fervently. They were both on their knees in the middle of the mattress, their naked bodies touching; cock's hard with obvious want.
"Fuck I need you so much" Greg whispered between kisses. His hands were on Nick's back as he unconsciously bucked his hips against Nick's.
"Get on your stomach" Nick ordered as he went to the drawer in his bedside table and pulled out a bottle of lube and a condom. Greg laid down on his stomach and sighed happily when he felt Nick's body across his back.
Nick knew it was going to be a little painful considering how much time had passed since either of them had sex. "Greg, do you want me to bottom this time, it's going to hurt?" He asked him. If he hadn't of cheated on Greg then they would have never been apart. He figured it was only for him to endure the pain and not Greg.
"No, I want it to be the way it was before" Greg said as he turned his head around to face Nick as much as he could, he pulled Nick's face closer to his and kissed him lightly on the lips. He smiled at the fact that Nick was thinking about him so considerately.
Nick kissed Greg softly on the back of his neck before sitting up-right with Greg between his legs and poured some lube on his fingers. He parted Greg's cheeks and placed a finger at the entrance to his hole. "This is going to be a little awkward baby, it's been a while."
"Do it" Greg said as he lifted his hips a little and pushed back. He had been waiting too long already.
Nick entered one finger into Greg and was rewarded with a moan from the younger man. If it had hurt it didn't show. He pushed it in further and smiled happily when he heard the whimper that Greg made whenever his prostate was stimulated. He added a second finger and stretched Greg's hole. He wanted Greg to be fully prepared when he entered him. He added a third finger and Greg was now thrashing around on the bed making small needy sounds. "Are you ready?"
"Fuck me Nick" Greg said through gritted teeth. He forgot how good Nick's fingers could feel, but he wanted more. He wanted to feel Nick all the way inside him. When Nick removed his fingers Greg propped himself up so he was on all fours, knowing that was one of their favorite positions together.
Nick put the condom on and then rubbed some lube on his dick, twisting a little at the head before he positioned his cock at Greg's entrance. "You are fucking gorgeous" Nick told him as he placed his hands on Greg's hips and entered him slowly. "So hot."
"Fuck" Greg said as he felt Nick fill him, it felt a little uncomfortable at first but after he adjusted the wonderful feeling of having Nick inside him washed over him and he felt content for the first time in a long time.
Nick leaned down and kissed Greg on his upper back, close to where his scars were as he moved slowly in and out. His body was telling him to speed up, that he needed more friction but Nick didn't want it to be over too soon.
"Harder" Greg grunted. His arms were aching from holding himself up but he didn't care. Nick was all he needed.
"God, you're so fucking tight, I missed this, I missed you" Nick said with a thick voice and he sped up, Greg's tight ass closing around him was driving him to the edge. "Fuck."
"Fucking hell" Greg half moaned when Nick grabbed his cock from behind and started to stroke it at the same pace as his thrust. He also changed his angle so that every time he entered Greg he hit the right spot. "Fuck me."
"So good baby, you feel so fucking good" Nick moaned as he sped up even more. He was plunging into Greg so hard and fast, he was sure the neighbors could hear the sound of skin hitting skin.
"I'm so close" Greg mumbled as he felt his body tense in anticipation of the orgasm that was coming. "Fuck, I need to…" but he couldn't finish his thoughts. The feelings in his body were too good. He moved his hips to the same rhythm as Nick's meeting every thrust.
Nick stroked Greg's cock even faster, he could feel that Greg was close and so was he. "Come for me baby, let go."
"Fuck… God I love you…" Greg said incoherently as he concentrated on the feeling of Nick's hand and dick. He felt that familiar tingle in his stomach as his orgasm hit him and he shot his load over the sheets and Nick's hand.
Nick felt the hot substance on his hand, felt Greg's release and it pushed him over the edge. "Fuck" He grunted as he shot his load inside of the condom and Greg.
They both slumped down onto the mattress in a heap. Silence filled the room except for heavy breathing. Nick realized he was still on top of Greg and rolled onto his side so he didn't crush him. He looked down and saw finger shaped bruises on Greg's hips from where he had been holding him, he didn't know he had been holding that tight. "Sorry" he said and Greg looked down to where he was pointing.
"Don't be sorry. That was fucking great" Greg said with a grin. "Want to go again?"
"Are you heading home?" Nick asked Greg a few weeks later. They had moved back into together and so far everything was going well. Warrick had been teasing him about the smile he couldn't wipe off his face.
"Yeah, Catherine and I finished up our case; how about you?" Greg asked him
"Sarah and I have to finish up some loose ends and then we're done. We are going to go and grab some breakfast, want to wait around and come?" Nick asked him.
"I'm pretty wiped. I think I'm going to go home and sleep" Greg said as he looked around the locker room to see if anyone was there. When he saw that he was clear he took Nick's face into his hands and kissed him deeply. Nick put his hands on Greg's waist and let himself get lost in the kiss. After a minute Greg broke away and gave Nick his best smile. "Expect more of the same when I wake up."
"I look forward to it" Nick smiled as he watched Greg walk out of room, turning to give him a little wink before he disappeared.
"I needed this coffee so much" Sara said as she took another sip of the black liquid. She smiled at Nick. "You and Greg seem to be on track again."
"Yeah we are; it's great. I never thought I would be this happy again" Nick told her.
"I'm happy for you both but just so you know if you ever cheat on him or hurt him in anyway I'll kill you" Sara said with a serious face.
"My mother has already told me that" Nick said with a small laugh. "Don't worry I'm never going to make that mistake again."
"Good" Sara replied as she looked around. "Now moving on to a happier note, are you going to give him the ring?" Sara asked.
"What, we only just got back together Sara give it some time" Nick told her as he shifted in his seat. He now wished he hadn't told her about the ring.
"Why put off something that's going to happen anyway."
"Because it needs to be the right time when I do it" Nick told her. "I want to make sure everything is back to normal before I go and change everything."
"I guess I'm just excited at the thought of seeing you two guys make it somewhat official" Sara said to him. "My faith in true love has been restored now that you two are back together."
"Did I just hear something romantic come out of Sara Sidles mouth" Nick said with mock surprise.
"Ha very funny Nick, I can be romantic when I want to be" Sara told him. "Or maybe you and Greg bring it out of me."
"Thanks… I think" Nick laughed.
Greg looked at the ring reaching out to touch it but changing his mind at the last second. The first time he had seen this ring was the night he and Nick had their huge fight five months ago. He had been looking for his socks and couldn't find any so he figured he would just borrow some of Nick's. But when he opened the draw and searched for a pair he liked he had seen the silver Celtic engagement ring hiding under a ratty old pair of Nick's socks.
At the time it had freaked him out and even though Nick didn't know it, it was the main cause for all the hurtful things Greg had said to him that night. The things he said weren't the way he really felt but he had been scared. Scared of what the ring meant and of how much Nick really loved him. Greg felt at the time that he was too young and too independent to be thinking about marriage. He knew Nick was older than him and was eager to settle down as properly as two men could. He had been pushing Nick away out of fear.
But things were different now, he had seen what life without Nick was like and he hated it. The whole time he and Nick were apart he was angry, but also missing the other man like crazy. He had never needed anyone the way he needed Nick. And after all the stuff with Ron happened he realized how easy it would be for him to lose Nick. Nick would die for him and that also scared him. He didn't want to live his life if Nick wasn't there to share it with him. He wanted Nick with him for the rest of his life; to be two old men sitting on their porch laughing over happy memories.
He looked at the ring one last time before closing the draw with a smile. The prospect of a real future with Nick no longer scared him; it made him happy and hopeful for all the things to come.
The End
Big huge thank-you to anyone who read and/or reviewed this story, you guys are great. And an even bigger thank-you goes to my regular reviewers, you guys always make me smile and have been awesome through this whole story! But the biggest hugs, love and thanks goes to my very patient and wonderful beta Jayceepat, you were so helpful and wonderful through this whole process
The title and chapter titles of this story were all based on song names. The names were either chosen for the name of the song alone or because of the lyric's of the song. Here's the list of names of the chapter, name and artist
Title: Disintegration- Jimmy Eat World
Chapter 1: Black- Pearl Jam
Chapter 2: Left and Leaving- The Weakerthans
Chapter 3: Communication Breakdown- Led Zeppelin
Chapter 4: No One Else- Weezer
Chapter 5: Walk Away- Kelly Clarkson
Chapter 6: Number One Blind- Veruca Salt
Chapter 7: Sundown- Veruca Salt
Chapter 8: One of a Kind- Placebo
Chapter 9: Aftertaste- Ben Lee
Chapter 10: One Step Closer- Linkin Park
Chapter 11: Sex Type Thing- Stone Temple Pilots
Chapter 12: Breathe Me- Sia
Thanks again.
