A/N: I am extremely happy. Have fun watching the finale today people!
I know I haven't posted in a long time. It's because of the CB drought we got. And now since 222, we've had some CB scenes, I am back to my original state. I don't want to give the finale away, I have already watched it, all I can say is, enjoy it all you can!
Love love love all around people! Rest assured, I will have next chap up ASAP, commemorating the finale after everyone has watched it.
CHUCK AND BLAIR ALL THE WAY! The most AMAZING couple ever to grace our screen!
Notes: I will DIE without my beta Ney ney (jencourt81), if it wasn't for her, this chapter wouldn't be done at all! The genius I love! This entire chap is perfected by her!
Also thank you to Danae for awesomery input! And of course, to those who keep reviewing with such enthusiasm, you people are awesome.
Before you start I have to warn you, I haven't written in a long time, so this chapter is freaking LONG to compensate the days I didn't update. Don't say I didn't warn you!
~*~*~*~*~
Chuck and Blair Scheming
Chuck watched her walk down the steps of Constance Billiard. He hadn't noticed this one before. Sure he'd heard enough about her. The newest bane of Blair's existence. The "hot" new teacher.
Eyes narrowed, he carefully took in the view, from head-to-toe. Pretty enough, in a "fresh off the turnip truck" way, but Chuck wasn't the least impressed.
A throat cleared behind him and he didn't actually need the words hissed at his ear to know just who stood there, "Enjoying the view, Bass."
Yep. Chuck swiveled his head, taking in the sight of his girlfriend. Now that was impressive. Something about flared nostrils and pursed lips apparently called to his baser instincts.
She was sexy as hell. The added edge of jealousy, flashing in her eyes presented too good an opportunity to pass on.
Chuck glanced at the new teacher and then dragged his gaze back to Blair's, "Quite. They say the grass is greener on the other side."
"I'm sure they do."
He watched, his stance deceptively indolent as he scrutinized her every movement from beneath a hooded gaze. Her mouth scrunched just so and her hands clenched at her sides. And those beautiful blazing eyes. Then she seemed to find calm. Her mouth curving, as she fought for cool reserve and control.
Blair said, "Then again. Those who do wonder at those greener pastures always end up greatly disappointed."
"True. Or they could find certain bouts of…er curiosity to be highly satisfying."
"You are a pig." Her control slipped, facing off with his leering visage.
Hand to chest, Chuck murmured, "You wound me."
"Not yet. I haven't, but just try me, Basshole." She snapped, "Dan and the others I understand…well, mostly…being charmed by Miss Corn Husker 2004."
"Blair."
She wasn't done or in any mode to be assuaged, "How can you possibly be enthralled by that…"
"I'm not." He drawled, that signature smirk curving his mouth.
"I've been…enthralled before as you put it and the new teach doesn't even begin to tip the scales."
"You're just trying to make me feel better. I am not amused, Bass."
"On the contrary, I couldn't be more serious on that count. Serious and highly irritated that you would lump me into any category with the likes of Dan Humphrey."
"So you don't find her the least bit hot…beddable?" Blair demanded.
He shrugged, "Come on, Waldorf. Even I have some standards. That would be like asking you to buy Dior off the rack."
She flinched, her mouth moued in disgust. "Stop talking now."
"Trust me, Blair. You have nothing to feel jealous about."
"Excuse me? Jealous?" Her head whipped around.
Oops. Instead of backpedaling, Chuck pushed ahead. "I'm just saying that you have nothing to worry about, Waldorf. She's got nothing on you."
"Let's get one thing straight. I am not jealous of that Pollyanna and I could care less what random bit of fluff you…"
He cut her off, chuckling softly, his mouth brushing hers in the barest of kisses and his arms winding about her waist. He shifted, pulling her close, so that she could feel just what effect she was having on him, down below.
"What do you think you're doing?" She demanded, making no effort to push him away.
"What does it look like?" He nuzzled her neck, dragging in her unique scent. He bit down gently, drawing a soft gasp from her.
"If you're trying to distract me, it's not working." Blair whispered breathlessly. Her blasé attitude completely ruined when he bit down again. She whimpered, her knees going the way of butter as his tongue darted out, laving her flushed skin.
"You sure about that?"
"Absolutely." Blair huffed with difficulty.
Chuck smiled against her neck, "Guess I'm not trying hard enough."
Then the Basstard rolled his hips and making her forget completely where they were and who might be looking on. Her fingers crept into his dark hair, wrenching his mouth back up to hers.
His satisfied growl was all that she knew or heard until reality barged in.
"Oh, God. Seriously, you guys. Would the two of you just get a room! Oh!" Serena rolled her eyes, making a face as she appeared at their side.
Chuck glared at the blonde when Blair shoved away from him, her fingers hiding her mouth. He made no secret of his irritation, "Serena. Isn't there somewhere else you need to be? So loser you're supposed to be fawning over."
"Oh, shut up. You two are lucky I was here before you guys decided to put on any more of a show." She motioned to where there half of their peers stood, laughing and talking, darting quick glances at Chuck and Blair.
Blair pinched her boyfriend's arm.
"Ow!" His satisfied smirk fell away.
"What was that for?"
"For being Chuck Bass."
He frowned at her.
"Look, guys. I hate to interrupt, but I really need to talk to Blair."
Serena stepped between them, as if they were liable to start going at it again, in word or manner, at any second.
"Of course." Blair nodded, pulling herself back under firm control, even as Chuck sidled around the other girl to come and stand at Blair's side.
"Alone, B." Serena implored, "It's really important. And private."
"Cabbage Patch, huh?" Chuck smiled, full of snark and mischief.
His expression all too knowing, especially when coupled with Blair's sudden interest in her latest manicure, her expression the picture of innocence.
"BLAIR!" Serena shouted.
Her best friend feigned ignorance, "What, S?"
"Blair! You told Chuck?!!!" She tried not to scream, but she was annoyed at Blair for sharing this information with Chuck.
Blair giggled, "It might have slipped out."
"What else did you tell him?!" Serena demanded.
"Not much. Maybe a detail or two."
Chuck smirked, "Or everything from A-Z"
"Blair Cornelia Waldorf…he's been your boyfriend for two friggin' seconds. I've been your best friend forever. I told you that stuff in the strictest of confidence."
"Sorry, S" Chuck said, trying and failing to keep a straight face as he continued, "But Blair and I believe in being completely honest with one another. About everything. Maybe if you and Humphrey had tried that you wouldn't have crashed and burned last year. This year. A few months ago. God, how many times have you people broken up."
Serena opened her mouth, looking apt to tear him a new one.
"Wait, don't answer that. I really don't care."
Blair elbowed him, trying to get him to shut up. "I'm sorry, Serena. I was worried and he wouldn't stop bugging me until I told him the whole story. Well, everything up until the part you told me about Rachel and Cabbage Patch going out together."
"B!!!." Serena moaned. "Might be! They might just be friends!"
"Aw, Serena. Self-deception does not look good on you."
"Chuck has a point, Serena. Come on, you said it yourself." Blair said, "Having coffee? Going out to talk about his writing? I think not! I've seen his writing and it's not something to gush about."
"Here, here." Chuck added dryly.
"Butt out, Chuck." Serena crossed her arms, still not able to quite get used to the idea of Blair confiding in Chuck. Granted her best friend would turn to Chuck even years before they finally hooked up. They'd all been friends together but now he was Blair's boyfriend. It was just weird. Them together, talking about her and Dan…Dan and Rachel.
As if recognizing the path of her best friend's thoughts perfect, Blair tried again, "I'm sorry, S. It's really tough hiding things from Chuck."
Then in the next instant, Serena watched as the twosome, the resident devil and Queen B shared one look. No words passed between them only a smile, that sent a foolish thrill through Serena. Her own mouth curving. It was definitely weird but they did look happy, she figured.
She wasn't completely sold on Chuck Bass getting unlimited access to all of her secrets but she couldn't disdain something that made to of her best friends so obviously happy and…right.
"Fine!" Serena said, giving in. "Not like he won't hear it eventually, anyway. Might as well kill two birds with one stone."
They all wandered further away from the others. "All right. So spill it. What's got you so worked up, S."
"I called Dan yesterday and he didn't pick up his phone." She said unhappily, "Not even once. He's been all weird and distant. I finally called the loft and his father thought Dan was out with me seeing some movie at the Angelika." She fidgeted, avoiding both and Chuck's eyes.
Blair gasped, "S, you didn't? You followed them."
"I'm not proud of myself. I can't believe I did that."
Chuck grinned from ear-to-ear like the Cheshire Cat, "You're being entirely too hard on yourself, Serena. Sometimes reconnaissance is entirely called for. You should've called Blair and we could've made a night of it."
"You should've, S. Dorota has this crazy collection of surveillance equipment. Maybe…"
"You guys, please. You're supposed to be talking me out of all the crazy…not encouraging more." Serena said.
Blair huffed, "Well, how are we supposed to know. The last time we tried to talk you out of giving Humphrey Dumpty the time of day, you shot us down."
Serena looked between the couple, her expression disgusted, "God, you have been spending entirely too much time with him and that is not what I met. I followed them to the movie."
"Was he with her?"
Serena shrugged, "I never spotted them and I couldn't exactly hunt from aisle to aisle. 'Oh, hi Dan, hey Rachel. Funny meeting you guys here. Pass the popcorn.' No. Thank you but no thank you."
"You're right. You'd have been spotted right off." Blair nodded,
"So you never saw them?" Chuck asked. "For all you know, Humphrey could've been flying solo or with his little sister."
"Despite the fact that it's you talking, I'm going to take that at face value and choose not to be disgusted," Blair rolled her eyes. She turned back to her friend. "Now answer the question, Serena."
"Namely with a stupid temp named Rachel?" Blair quirked a brow in amusement.
"No, I didn't." She admitted, "Maybe, I'm being paranoid."
"Well, there's really only one way to know for sure." Blair said after a moment. "Chuck and I can look into it for you."
"What? No…no….bad idea. No."
Blair shrugged, expecting nothing less, "Fine. But I wouldn't look over at the steps just now."
Of course that only ensured her friend getting an eyeful off Dan and Rachel together with their heads close in deep conversation. Serena dragged her eyes away when they started laughing.
"Now that's disturbing," Chuck murmured as he pulled out his phone. "Don't worry, Serena. We're on it."
"No, guys. I haven't changed my mind."
"S, really, why would you even tell us if you didn't want us to do anything about it?" Blair asked.
"Because you're my best friend and I tell you things like these and …" she eyed Chuck, "I have no choice to tell him too because you're just going to tell him anyway. I'm serious, Blair. Don't do anything. The last time you tried to get back at her you got Yale on hold!"
"Exactly," Blair sighed, "Serena, I want my revenge, and I fully intend on getting it. Why not throw in a favor for my best friend while I'm at it."
Serena's eyes widened, "Blair!"
"She endangered my dreams of Yale. Do you know how hard I've been working to make this happen. How it would look if I just let things pass without doing anything about it." Blair asked Serena who didn't say anything. "I have a reputation to uphold, you know."
"Can't have people thinking she's gone soft." Chuck said.
"Exactly."
"Guys, I don't know about this." Once again, the blonde's eyes drifted to Dan and Rachel.
"No, point in arguing, S. Consider it a done deal." Blair said, turning on her heels and walking away with that simple declaration.
Chuck met Serena's eyes, pride and anticipation in his tone. "You heard her. Best to get out of her way and see where everything lands when the dust settles."
"You're worse than she is. Chuck, this is the entire reason why Yale is at risk now. She's just going to make things go further down the toilet. Convince her to leave it alone. If you care about her future, make sure she doesn't pull some insane stunt that's going to cost her Yale. You know how much she's always wanted it." Serena laid it out for him, trying to talk him over to her side of the argument.
"Yes, I do. And the reason her last plan tanked so badly was because she didn't have her partner-in-crime. Some one to pull their share of the weight." Chuck said, "The reason she ended up with detention and Yale on the line was her listening to her idiotic minions, who can't tell a donkey's ass from the front."
"Nothing good can come out of this."
"Have faith. You'll know for sure what's happening between Humphrey and Mary Kay Letourneau." Chuck assured, "Blair will get her revenge which will make her happy. And me happy by extension."
"That's really sweet, Chuck."
"Well, a little self-serving I'll admit. If she's in a particularly good mood I just might be able to talk her into playing around a bit. I'll be the dean of her beloved Yale and she can be the naughty, little valedictorian in…"
"Gross. Just stop. I'm not listening." Serena clapped her hands over her ears. "Oh, That was too gross. Even for you."
"Sorry. Got carried away. But seriously. Let me and Blair handle this thing with the new teacher."
"What if I'm wrong. Maybe I'm just looking for something or someone to blame for my breakup with Dan." Serena mumbled.
"I'd say let me know when you figure it out, but…"
"You don't care. I remember."
"Look, maybe you're not imaging things." He jerked his chin towards the twosome by the stairs. "They look far too cozy to be only discussing themes and critical theory. It's highly probably that you're on to something here and the teacher is doing a little harvesting of the forbidden fruit."
"Fine. But you and Blair have to be really careful."
"Aw, worried about me, van der Woodsen?"
"No, I don't want Blair getting into trouble. She'd be really devastated if…"
"Serena." He interrupted, "I know."
"I'm serious, Chuck."
He turned until he could see the limo waiting for him, just outside of the gates. And his girlfriend standing there. Looking as beautiful and as impatient as ever.
"Don't worry. I'll handle it." He winked at Serena who just looked at him exasperatedly as he walked away from her. His thoughts and entire focus immediately and obviously on Blair.
Serena would never say it, but Chuck and Blair were the happiest when they're together, and that was beyond scary.
~*~*~*~*~
"It's so creepy that you know this." Blair said as they stood just across the street, of Rachel's apartment.
"Which part? That I know where she lives, or that I knew which beret you'd be wearing?" he asked back.
They were both wearing black, and sitting inside of Chuck's limo. Chuck in his long black trench coat that matched Blair's perfectly. Only she wore a black beret over her dark hair.
"Both." Blair said.
"What can I say? My PIs earn their keep. They can find anyone, anywhere." Chuck told her.
"I meant that I don't always wear this beret out." Blair seemed to be trained on her sense of fashion than where Chuck found his information out.
He chuckled, "You wear this beret when you're Agent Blair Waldorf, wannabe spy."
She turned red and smacked his arm, "Well, at least I don't go 'Bass…. Chuck Bass' whenever we're going undercover like this. Double-Oh Jackass."
"Admit it, Waldorf, you love it when I turn hot British spy on you." He leaned close and blew into her ear, sending shivers through her.
Damn him! He was too sexy and knew his effect on the female equilibrium. Dangerous combination for anyone and worser still if your name happened to be Chuck Bass.
"You only wish." She rolled your eyes.
"No, I think you wish I were taking that beret off…and the coat." He teased.
"Shush!" she hissed when she finally caught sight of their quarry walking to her apartment. They both watched the young teacher hurry towards her apartment door, keys in hand. The woman glanced furtively around before slipping inside, caution and nerves, written clearly in her features.
Blair frowned, "Who on earth does that?! She's hiding something, or someone, or something!"
"Wanna pick one?"
"Shut up, Bass. We need to get in there." She said, "Or at least a better view inside. Now help me instead of trying to feel me up and cracking tasteless jokes every fives seconds." She leveled a death glare in his direction.
"Okay, you're right. I'll help."
"Good." She smiled her eyes floating toward the windows as they flickered to life. The teacher seemed to turn every single light on. "God, Global warming."
"Yeah, don't think that's going to get her fired."
"I thought you were going to help. Do you have that lockpick kit?" She asked, "Did Mike give it to you?"
"Yes, but we're not using it."
"Why not?"
"Because, we're not. She's in there…"
"Doing who knows what."
"It doesn't matter. She's in there and I think you'd get a heavier punishment then cleaning up the park for B&E. You wouldn't survive an hour in jail."
"Well, what do you suggest we do? Wait here for someone to come out." She watched through narrowed eyes as he poured them a drink. "Chuck, this is not the time. We've got a job to do here."
"Actually, I think our job is done here for the evening. We've gotten a look at the neighborhood. Confirmed that this is her place." Chuck shrugged, settling back against the leather seats.
"Okay. Well, would you care to enlighten me as to our next move?"
"We come back. Tomorrow while Daisy Mae is doing her level best to torture you and your minions…I'll be here. Installing these babies."
He tossed something small and black at her that she only caught out of sheer instinct of not getting nabbed in the eye.
"Nice reflexes."
She glared before staring down at the little device, no bigger than her thumb, "What is it? And why are you the only one who gets to come back tomorrow."
"Because," He sipped at his scotch, "I think it would be better if you had an alibi."
Five minutes later, Blair was smiling like the cat who eaten the canary. "Well, Bass. I must say that I am impressed. Sound plan."
"One of my best. Now what do you say that we head back to my place. Bart's away. No Dorota hovering or Eleanor giving me the evil eye." Chuck drawled, "Come here."
Temptation rose and despite everything they'd been through together and done with one another, her face ran hot at the look in his eyes, "I don't know. We'll definitely go with your plan but maybe we should give this another hour or so."
Chuck sighed as she turned back to stared out the window, her eyes on Rachel's windows, tracking the shadows crossing now and again. "I suppose we could." He said, draining the remainder of his drink before sliding across the seat behind her. His hand trailing along her thigh, drawing small circles that made her tremble.
"Now? You want to do that now?"
"Well, stakeouts are notoriously boring. Gotta keep ourselves occupied somehow." Chuck said, his other hand sweeping her hair from her nape. He groaned, drawing a secretive smile from her. Their eyes meeting in the reflection from the glass.
Her eyelids fluttered, drifting shut as his mouth worked at her nape and the shell of her ear. "Blair?"
"Hmm,"
"Have I told you lately, how much I adore your…uh fashionable spywear?"
"Actually.." She started breathlessly. "I believe you might have mentioned something earlier."
"That was before I got a glimpse at what you had beneath that trench coat." He leered, his other hand back to drawing circles from knee to hip. Going higher with each pass, tugging at her La Perlas.
"Chuck," She whimpered, those glazed eyes snapping open long enough to tell him that they were on the same page. Blair turned in his arms, her mouth crashing into his for one long, hungry kiss after another.
Her teeth nipped playfully at his lips, her fingers curled in his hair. Long moments melded in together. They could've gone on for like that for minutes or hours. Too wrapped up in one another who could know. Blair only came back to herself when he yanked at her panties, pulling them down.
"Chuck, wait." She gasped out, reaching for steady breath. At some point her Beret had fallen to the wayside and she didn't remember doing it but Chuck's shirt was halfway undone, reddened marks from her nails, showing their path and her own blouse was open to the waist, buttons completely missing. Blair looked at Chuck, his hair sticking out from every end. " You owe me a new shirt."
"Noted. I'll have it delievered tomorrow with a little something extra from La Perla." Chuck said, before yanking again at her panties until a ripping sound filled the air.
"Now was that really necessary? I swear that you just get a kick out of picking out new ones to replace the ones you…oooh." She lost track of what she'd meant to say. Her eyes locked on his as those fingers found sensitized flesh.
"You were saying?"
"I haven't the slightest clue." She said, her teeth chewing at her lip. Eyes floating shut again. "Now shut up and keep doing…yea. That."
"As you wish."
Her body was liquid fire, pliant and moveable as he laid her back against the leather seat where she'd first given herself to him that long ago night. Her skirt rucked up around her waist and blouse tossed over his shoulder, leaving her only in her bra, while he remained mostly dressed. If she'd been able to think clearly she might've demanded he remove the rest of his, but she couldn't think. Could only feel. Her head tossed from side to side,
"Humphrey?"
Her mind stuttered to a halt, breaking into the moment. She replayed it in her head. Once. Twice. Trying to figure if she'd heard right.
"WALDORF? You meant Waldorf." She all but yelled in his ear.
What the hell!? Right when she was about to…her boyfriend had called out someone else's name. Humphrey's name. After finding out about Nate and Serena, she'd had nightmare visions of such a thing happening but this was Chuck. Her Chuck. What the hell was going on?!!! Blair's brain went into overdrive.
WHICH Humphrey? The male or female?! Dan or Jenny? What the hell was going on?! Were you thinking of a freaking dirty Humphrey while you were kissing me?! WHAT. THE. HELL. BASSHOLE?!
What Blair didn't notice was that she was saying what she was thinking out loud, which led Chuck to just burst out laughing in front of her face.
He fell off her and onto the floor of his limo, still laughing.
"CHUCK BASS! WHAT'S SO DAMNED FUNNY!" she shouted as she struck out, hitting him across the head. His hands came up automatically, shielding himself from her repeated blows, still laughing his ass off.
"OH GOD. Hate you. Hate you so damn much right now…you just have no idea and stop laughing at me you motherchucking Basshole!" She ordered.
First saying Humphrey's name and now he couldn't seem to stop laughing at her expense?! The NERVE. They were so done. So completely and utterly ov…
"Enough, kitten. Sheath your claws." He said, clutching at his stomach. It hurt so bad from laughing so hard. She'd really lost it. He couldn't believe some of her more insane accusations. Humphrey. What in the hell was she thinking. This entire teacher/Yale business was really getting to her.
He grew serious, catch the hurt creeping into her eyes. Well, fuck.
She pushed away from him and started reaching for her clothes.
"Blair…"
"Forget it. I don't care. I don't want to hear it."
"I was trying to tell you that Humphrey is outside of Carr's apartment." He finally got out, tipping his head towards the teacher's building.
Sure enough there was Dan Humphrey, standing just beneath the teachers windows like some lovesick Romeo. His cellphone at his ear.
"Two guesses who he's on the phone with." Chuck smirked.
"Oh my god." Blair whispered, forgetting that she was half-naked and their spat of moments before. She beamed, when Rachel came to the window and motioned for Dan to go to the door. "We were right. I mean, S was right. And you wanted to leave. Oh my God. Dan's sleeping with our teacher."
Chuck shrugged, "He could just be dropping off make-up work."
Blair glanced over her shoulder in disbelief, "Yea right. This close to midnight. I don't think so."
"I'm serious." He said, his heated gaze sweeping a slow path across her exposed flesh. His gaze as tangible as if he'd reached out and brushed his fingers across her cheek or started in again with those maddening circles, he enjoyed teasing her with. "Humphrey could be going in there to do a little make up work. Their own version of the Dean and the Naughty Valedictorian."
Blair shuddered at that thought and from what she'd been feeling earlier with Chuck. "Yuck. I just got a visual."
"So did I. Didn't know Humphrey had it in him. Nailing a teacher. Cliché but might just be hope for Brooklyn just yet." Her boyfriend actually sounded proud of Serena's ex for his recent conquest.
"You are heinous." They watched Humphrey wait to be buzzed up and then disappear inside. Minutes dragged on and then all of the lights went out. One after another. Blair waited to see if the twosome reemerged from the building. But they didn't. .Ohmigod. They'd known but now and quite possibly at that very moment, Dan was having sex with their teacher. "What do we do now?"
"Well, we get the hell out of Dodge. Can't have Humphrey noticing the limo…though he might be too wrapped up in post-coital bliss…still wouldn't do to take a chance. We'll have Arthur drop us off around the corner, then we can circle back and wait for him to come out."
"So we scrap the original plan?"
"No. We—I come back tomorrow and install these babies in every room of her apartment. It won't take me more than a few minutes and they work like a charm, trust me. We can get a picture of him leaving her building tonight, too. Just in case."
Blair's expression was nothing short of blissful. "And then it's payback time."
"Exactly." He kissed the tip of her nose.
"One question, though." She reached for one of the lipstick cameras that would be installed in Carr's apartment in the morning. "When exactly have you had cause to use one of these things?"
He was quiet, offering only that smile that drove her crazy, "Wouldn't you like to know?"
"Fine, don't tell me." She reached for her cell phone.
Figuring that she was about to tell her best friend, just what they'd seen, Chuck decided to give her a little privacy. Taking that moment to lower the partition and have a quick conversation with his driver. Never once did the man peek into the review. He listened and nodded as Chuck gave him his instructions.
Blair was just hanging up when he came back to settle next to her. She shoved her arms into her ruined blouse.
"So, how'd Serena take the news?"
"What?"
"Serena. What'd she say when you told her that she'd been right?"
Blair smiled, "That wasn't Serena."
"Then who was it?"
"Wouldn't you like to know." She retorted, quirking an imperious brow.
Chuck didn't beg or demand. Instead he snagged her cell phone from the seat where she'd let it drop.
"Hey, give it back."
"One second." He turned his back, making it difficult for her to maneuver around him in the enclosed space. "Just one moment…Dorota? You called Dorota?"
She snatched the phone back, "Yes, if you must know. She's sweeping my room for any of your little toys or gadgets that you may have accidently *cough*onpurpose*cough* left. Dorota has a few toys of her own."
He made a face at that.
"Oh, stop being disgusting."
"Can't help it. You bring out the best in me, Waldorf." Chuck re-buttoned his own shirt as much as he could and reached for his coat. "Better make yourself presentable for the outside word, baby. We need to get around the corner and better before Humphrey comes out."
"Let's get on with it and just so you know. I'm heading home after this and you'll just have to make do without me."
"Blair, I did not bug your room."
"I know you and that's totally a Chuck Bass move."
"Not when it comes to you, Waldorf." He said, reaching for her hand as the car began moving. "What do I need with some video when I've got the real thing on standby."
"On standby, huh."
"Yes." He hissed, bringing her hand up for a quick kiss. "Now, let's get a move on."
"I'm still not spending the night."
Chuck shrugged, "Guess that means I am, then."
Blair rolled her eyes but didn't counter it. She wanted nothing less. They'd follow through on his plan for the rest of their little mission and then she had a few plans of her own.
--
Less than a week later, Chuck and Blair were by the steps with Serena in deep conversation. The blonde casting glances at her teacher and ex-boyfriend more than once.
"So, are you sure that you're up for this, Serena?"
The blonde was quiet, making no effort to hide her hurt feelings. She cleared her throat, turning back to her best friend. "I'm sure. You've got Yale hanging in the balance and they both deserve it. When I think of all the times that I messed up and he just jumped down my throat…yeah. Use it." Her mouth flattened and arms crossed.
Blair reached into her purse with one gloved hand and withdrew the DVD case she'd gotten from Chuck the day before. "And you got all of the cameras back, right?"
"Yes, Waldorf. Forth the millionth time yes and I wore gloves so my fingerprints couldn't possibly be found in any room of her little apartment." Chuck smiled, "Humphrey's on the other hand…"
"Then shall we?" Blair waggled her brows, suggestively.
"We shall, but first the takedown."
Blair shook her head, "Mind out of gutter, Bass. S, are you coming."
"No, I think I'll enjoy the fall out from a distance. And B? Thank you."
"For you?" Blair hugged her best friend, winking over the girl's shoulder with her next words. "For you, anytime."
The duo started off, winding their way through tittering and gossiping classmates. Soon enough, the sharks would have something new to tear into. Too wrapped up in one another, neither Rachel nor Dan saw them coming until they were practically on top of the wildly inappropriate pair.
Dan's confused faded quickly and he glared at Chuck, "What do you want, Bass? Don't you and your girlfriend have better things to do?"
"Actually, we do, but we were feeling gracious enough to pencil you and your girlfriend in…in between." Chuck dragged his eyes away from Humphrey and met for the first time the bane of his beloved's existence. He'd been away on business with his father or for his father for the most part. If he'd been in town the first time around, Blair might not be in danger of losing her dream that was Yale. He felt guilty about that. Not being around when she'd needed him. That she'd had to rely on those flighty bitches who couldn't wait to stab her in the back at every opportunity. "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. I'm Chuck Bass."
"Actually, I've heard quite a bit about you. Your reputation proceeds you."
"I'm sure."
"That wasn't a compliment." Rachel turned her attention to Blair, "Miss Waldorf."
"Miss Carr," Blair's tone was saccharine sweet, adrenaline pumping and ready to go in for the kill. She tamped down on the urge. In all due time, she reminded herself.
"Dan, could you excuse us for a moment." The teacher said,
"No, Dan. Please stay. You should hear this too."
"Blair, if you're going to apologize, let me just tell you now that it's of no use. You hazed a teacher. The decision is out of my hands."
"I apologized to you."
"You shouldn't have done it in the first place. Now, as I said, the Dean will make his decision."
Chuck said, "You could talk him. Might do some good if Blair's accuser lobbied on her behalf."
"I'm sorry, but that's enough." Dan said, "You're evil. You are an evil human being. You hurt people because it makes you happy about your sad existence. Why should Rachel go out of her way to help you?"
"Rachel? Is it, Hum-drum?"
Dan shifted. "Miss Carr. I meant Miss.."
"Oh, drop the act." Blair hissed, her eyes narrowed and smile catty. They wanted the Bitch. Well, they were going get her.
Chuck smiled, recognizing that look in her eyes.
"We know exactly what type of…um…extracurriculars you've been up to with Rachel." Blair revealed, "We saw you outside of her place the other night."
"My place. What were you two doing at my apartment?"
"Better question still. What was Humphrey doing there at…hmm. What time was that again?" Blair inquired, turning to Chuck.
"I can't quite remember. Let me check." Her boyfriend slipped his cellphone from his pocket. "1:35AM…You were in there a while, Humphrey. I was almost impressed."
Chuck held up his cell phone to give both a better look at the time stamp and Dan's visible state, clothing wrinkled and hastily button. His hair sticking out in tufts. Chuck shook, his head regretfully. "I know. I know exactly what you're going to say. You look like this everyday and how does this prove anything conclusively."
"You, son-of-a-bitch."
"Inappropriate, maybe. Visiting the apartment of a teacher…late at night…but pictures and time stamps could be doctored…right?" Chuck said, a thrill something like what he'd felt bringing down those useless Skull & Bones boys. Only this was a million times better. He glanced over at Blair who offered the DVD case and a yellow envelope. "For your viewing pleasure."
Rachel took the envelope and DVD, her expression confused, while Dan watched the exchange with dawning horror.
"What is this?" Rachel demanded, starting to open the envelope but Dan beat her to the punch. Her undelightful ignorance lasted only so long. The DVD clutched against her chest. "Oh my God."
Chuck smarmed, "Yes, you do mention him quite a lot there. Seriously impressive, Humphrey. Well, when I didn't want to stab my eyes out."
"I could've done without the visual myself, but we do what we must." Blair murmured, "Isn't that right? Rachel."
"Those are just a few of the stills. You'd have to watch the DVD to get the full effect."
"When? How?" Rachel demanded.
Dan looked ready to punch them both. He even took a step forward, only to stop short under his lover's staying hand.
"Answer me. How…?" She turned on Dan. "You? You helped them. You set me up."
"No. Of course not." Dan turned to her
"Then how else?!" She yelled, drawing unwanted attention to their little powwow.
As Rachel fought for control and Dan worked to reassure her that he hadn't be involved, Chuck and Blair shared a quick smile at the unforeseen turn.
"Humphrey, drop the act. She figured us out. Take credit where it's do, friend." Chuck said.
"You bastard. You are just like them. Only worse." Rachel whispered for their ears alone. She snatched the envelope from him. "You pretended that you wanted me. That you liked me and you were just setting me up for your friends."
"They are not my friends."
"Oh, cut the act, Dan." Rachel squared her shoulders and turned to Blair. "What do you want me to do?"
"Rachel, please."
The teacher turned her back on him. Dan looked at them all, shaking his head. He started speak again, when his eyes fell on a familiar face across the courtyard. A satisfied look on her face. She knew the truth and she was enjoying every second of what Chuck and Blair were doing. God. How had he ever fallen into this? Dan stormed off without another word or backwards glance.
"Tell me. What do you want?" The teacher asked again.
"You know what I know. I want you to talk to the Dean." Blair said.
"And say what…"
"That's up to you. Tell him you lied…I don't care but you do whatever it takes to undo the damage you wrought." Blair ordered.
"You started this, young lady."
"Yes, and I ended it. I never knew you were such a bitch. I am actually impressed."
Chuck nodded, "Quite admirably in my opinion. I wanted her to leak the pictures and DVD to Queller. But, no. B's all heart."
"Change the Dean's mind. Hand in your resignation. And catch the next bus out of our lives and back to Idaho…"
"Iowa." Rachel corrected.
Blair made a face, "Same difference."
"I need this job."
"I guess you should've thought of that before you started sleeping with a student."
"Dan was right. You're both evil and I don't belong here. I want the originals."
Chuck assured her, "And you'll get them, as soon as you do as Blair requested."
Rachel opened her mouth to speak again. Instead she turned on her heel and left.
Blair watched her go, bouncing on her toes like a kid. Once the other woman was out of sight, Blair threw back her head and laughed out loud, launching herself at Chuck who caught her with open arms.
"Oh my God. It worked. I'm going to Yale."
"Yes, you are." Chuck whispered, kissing her softly.
"God, that felt good. The takedown, Bass. Haven't felt that amazing in a long time. Almost better than sex."
"Hey!! I beg to differ."
"I said almost."
"Care to put it to a test." He escorted her from the courtyard.
"We should really go and update Serena."
"Oh, I'm sure that she saw well enough." Chuck led her to the limo. "I made us reservations at Butter…little celebration. But first. Why don't we finish what we started in here a few nights ago?"
"I thought we did." She smirked.
"Didn't count…wasn't in the limo."
"So my room…your room…the teacher's lounge." She wrapped her arms around him, welcoming his kiss.
"Not the limo," was his whispered reply before he instructed Arthur to take them on a tour about the city.
And they survived another week together.
~*~*~*~*~
Chuck and Blair holding hands Check.
Chuck and Blair going to the movies Check
Chuck and Blair taking pictures Check
Chuck and Blair going shopping. Check
Chuck and Blair celebrating thanksgiving (and meeting the father) Check.
Chuck and Blair spending Christmas together. Check
Chuck and Blair missing each other. Check
Chuck and Blair….finally? Check
Chuck and Blair having dinner with Big Bad Bart. Check
Chuck and Blair going.. Camping?! . Check
Chuck and Blair spending Valentines Day… Together. Check
Chuck and Blair scheming. Check
Next on to do list.
Chuck and Blair going on spring break.
