PLEASE READ! PLEASE READ! PLEASE READ! PLEASE READ!
Ok this is the FULL chapter ten, the last chapter was just part of chapter ten, this is chapter 10 in its full glory betad and spell checked and such. Hope you enjoy.
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Hiro sat on the edge of the fountain skimming his fingertips over the surface of the water, causing the glassy surface to ripple, making his reflection look like an abstract painting. He liked the way his reflection looked now, so he continued to run his fingers over the water because he knew if he stopped he would see a reflection he didn't like. Eyes red and puffy, lips red from were he'd been biting and chewing them thoughtfully. He would see his face. His stupid idiot face.
Why had he kissed him? Why? It made no sense to him. Sure, Hiro felt an attraction towards the man, he intrigued him. Hiro wanted to be close to the man find out more about him.
It all started when K had stood so close to Hiro that he could feel the warmth radiate off the man. Then he'd started to cry, all the emotions of the past few days catching up on him. Then he'd stood closer, resting his head against the firm chest. He'd felt somehow relived then, being able to cry, just cry silently. And K had gently patted his back, like a parent comforting its child. And Hiro had just wanted to feel that comfort, but he wanted to be closer, warmer. And, before the thought was even processed by his brain, he'd kissed his teacher. Damn.
A green blur had joined the abstract painting. Now that hadn't been there before. He stilled his hand and let the water return to its still form. Reflected in it now was his face in sharp detail, and the green blur behind him was Suguru, just who he didn't want to see. He didn't want the boy to see him like this again, so he said nothing. He just stared at the boy's reflection, hoping he'd leave but also hoping he'd stay.
The reflection grew bigger as the boy moved closer, and he sat down next to Hiro on the edge of the fountain, not saying a word, just staring into the water like Hiro was. They sat in silence for a while and Hiro started to feel nervous, he could feel Suguru watching him out the corner of his eye, waiting for him to say something. Hiro's fingers started to skate nervously over the water again, distorting their reflections. He heard Suguru sigh and finally he spoke.
"Wanna talk about it?" Hiro said nothing, not really sure of the answer. He was startled out of his train of thought as he was splashed with ice cold water. He spluttered slightly and looked up to Suguru's face which was smiling at him, eyes alight with laughter.
"Well that got your attention."
Hiro just glared at the boy, but he gave up after a few seconds. It was hard to glare at someone who was laughing at you.
"I kissed him."
Suguru raised an eyebrow, surprised that Hiro actually spoke.
"Who?"
"K-sensei."
Suguru's eyes bugged out of his head and his jaw almost hit the water. It was a comical sight and Hiro couldn't help but chuckle. There was also a shadow in the boy's eyes. Was it…sadness?
After picking up his jaw and composing his features into a serious expression, the boy spoke again.
"Awkward," Suguru stared thoughtfully at the water. "Did he kiss you back?"
Hiro shook his head. Suguru regarded him thoughtfully.
"Do you love him?" Hiro's hand stopped, his whole body tensed, and he took on the look of a statue, eyes emotionless, face not giving anything away.
"I...I don't know," Hiro's shoulders slumped in defeat. "I thought I did. I was always thinking about him, I was always watching him, but…it didn't feel how I thought it would. There was...nothing there. Nothing," he whispered as his hands continued their dance over the water.
Suguru stayed were he was, staring at his reflection. Hiro was glad. He didn't need pity right now.
"If you want, I'll come with you when you go talk to him." Hiro froze again.
"I...I can't," he said pathetically.
"You have to at least say sorry. You still have another few years left in his class. Do you want it to be awkward all the time?" Hiro's shoulders slumped again. Suguru had too much common sense for a teenager.
He had a point, a horribly sharp, clear, unavoidable point. He had to talk to K. After all, he did have another four years left. They would be hell if he didn't make some sort of amends with the teacher. But where to begin?
"Hey! Let's go get a drink or something, take your mind off things."
Hiro smiled slightly, trying to imagine Suguru drunk. Somehow he couldn't. "You're underage," Hiro said quietly. Suguru scowled.
(I did my research, the legal drinking age in Japan is 20, but you can get drinks from vending machines on any street so how they manage to enforce the law is beyond me.)
"So are you," Suguru retorted, "and no one needs to know that anyway." Hiro laughed, he hadn't seen this side of the boy before. He kind of liked it. He was showing his teenage side for once.
"I can't...I'd feel…bad. Going out and having fun with Shuichi in the hospital and now this."
"Then pretend you're someone else, just for tonight," Suguru smiled "Forget everything."
Hiro still looked reluctant, but a part of him wanted to go. Forgetting his problems, even for just one night, was so tempting.
"All right let's go." He jumped to his feet and took long purposeful stride, trying to look more confident than he was. He looked at Suguru to make sure the boy was following him. He seriously doubted the boy would pass for twenty. Hell even he could just barely pass for twenty. If worst came to worst they could just get some drinks from a vending machine and go back to one of their dorms to drink.
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Tokyo was beautiful in the mid afternoon. It was like the calm before the storm, people rushing home from staying late at work and a few early parties graced its streets. Hiro knew that it would get rather hectic soon as students, and other young people who inhabited the city and surrounding areas, poured into it for the night life.
The streets were still packed but there was calmness to the people. The first place they tried was a rather posh looking club. Hiro didn't even know why they bothered to try it, it looked like a members only affair. But they walked up to the door confidently. The guard just eyed them suspiciously. As soon as he laid eyes on Suguru, Hiro swore the man started to laugh.
"Passes?" he asked politely around his chuckles. Suguru seemed oblivious. Hiro just smiled and walked away. There really hadn't been any point in trying.
They walked around a bit longer, trying different bars and clubs but each time someone lay eyes on Suguru they were politely refused entry. After trying ten different places Hiro was starting to get annoyed. His craving for a drink had been growing and growing and now he was ready to kill anybody that stood in his way to get it.
They reached a karaoke bar and Hiro yelled in triumph. Anyone could use the karaoke, you just had to be old enough to buy the drinks there. And Hiro felt confident he could easily pass for twenty, if not he hoped his charms would do the trick. He grabbed Suguru's arm and dragged him into the place, a manic glint in his eye. He really wanted to get wasted tonight and forget everything.
The small woman behind the desk seemed to be taking a nap and woke with a start when Hiro and Suguru burst through the doors. Well, when Hiro burst through the doors, Suguru was dragged.
She looked a bit reluctant to give them a room, but she could hardly refuse customers, so she took their money and gave them a key to one of the karaoke rooms.
Their room was on the top floor and gave a great view of the city. There were bean bags and other small puffy chairs covering every space possible. A karaoke machine was nestled in the corner, a television next to it where the lyrics would appear. Suguru slouched into one of the bean bags gratefully and sighed. The walls were covered in odd material that looked like something you'd find in a white padded room but they were probably there to sound proof the room. He offered a smile to Hiro but the other man was already halfway to the door.
"Going to get drinks, be right back," he said cheerfully before leaving Suguru alone. The boy sighed and let his head flop back so he was half lying down staring at the ceiling.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Hiro bounced into the bar happily. As he walked to the bar he composed his face into a serious expression and he composed his hair into a relatively neat appearance. As he walked up to the bar he smiled cheerfully at the bar maid. She looked about twenty-four and her black hair tumbled around her body in graceful curves and curls. Her eyes were black pools of darkness, and her small lips curled into a smile at Hiro's kind face.
"Ten beers please!" he said slapping a few yen bills onto the counter.
She raised her eyebrows curiously but seemed happy that Hiro was old enough to buy the drinks and she headed for the fridge behind the bar. She brought bottle after bottle of beer to the counter until all ten beers sat there, and she took the money and gave Hiro the change. He smiled kindly at her and gathered the bottles in his arms. He offered her a cheeky wink before going back to the karaoke room.
oooooooooooooooooo
When Hiro got back he saw Suguru shuffling through different songs until he found one suitable to sing. He smiled shyly a Hiro.
"I warn you, I can't sing very well. Keep anything glass well away from me." Hiro just laughed and fell down onto a spare bean bag, opening a beer with his teeth. He nodded a cue for Suguru to sing. Suguru just shook his head as the music started.
Mata me atte soshite kotoba o kawashita
Mune ga takanatte egao de kakushita
Kimi o shiranakatta koro ni
Modorenaku narisou de
Suguru actually wasn't too bad, his skill in music allowed him to reach the right notes and he threw his whole heart into the song, a smile dancing across his face.
Kaze ga mou tsumetaku natta ne
Waraigoe ga shiroku michiru
Wake mo naku nakete kuru no wa
Fuyu no sei kamo shirenai
Deatta yoru o ima demo oboeteru
He'd started dancing along to the music of the energetic song by now, eyes sparkling. His eyes caught Hiro and he smiled, body still moving to the song.
Mata me atte soshite kotoba o kawashita
Mune ga takanatte egao de kakushita
Kimi o shiranakatta koro ni
Modorenaku narisou de
There seemed to something behind the song too. This was Suguru was singing it, as if it were his own thoughts and feelings.
Sukoshi zutsu shitte yuku noni
Kyuu ni zenbu wakaranaku naru
Sakende mo ii tsutawaru made tsutaete
Aenai jikan ni omoi ga tsunotta
Todokanai koe ni kokoro ga itanda
Kimi o shiranakatta koro ni
Modorenaku natte ita
Hiro watched Suguru as he drank his beer, smiling at the teen's energy. Suguru looked happy and Hiro found he hadn't thought of K once yet, until then of course. He shook his head and returned his attention back to Suguru.
Douka sonna fuu ni kanashige na hitomi de
Kowaresou ni kiesou ni warawanai de
Nee boku ni wa nani ga dekiru
Aenai jikan ni omoi ga tsunotta
Todokanai koe ni kokoro ga itanda
Kimi o shiranakatta koro ni
Modorenaku natte iru
Doushite tokidoki sunao ni ienai
Doushite tokidoki yasashiku narenai
Doushite tokidoki kizutsuke atteru
Doushite tokidoki tashikame atteru
Doushite tokidoki konnani kurushii
Doushite itsudemo konnani itoshii
Kimi ja nakya dame de
Kimi ja nakya dame de
Suguru bowed as he finished his song and Hiro cheered.
"Ok your turn!" he threw the mike at Hiro.
Hiro had already drunk two beers so he totally missed the mike and it smacked him right in the face. He growled at Suguru but the boy just laughed and picked up a beer. He tried to open it with his teeth but failed miserably. Hiro shook his head and took the beer from Suguru and opened it for him. It probably wasn't the best idea to open beer bottles with his teeth but he was too lazy to go to the bar to get a bottle opener. He gave the beer back to Suguru and chose a random song.
The night passed like that, each taking turns to sing, sometimes stopping to talk. After a while Hiro made another trip to the bar and got another armful of drinks. Hiro was slowly getting more and more drunk. His vision started to blur and he slurred his words horribly. He tossed the mike to Suguru and crashed onto a nearby chair.
Suguru snatched the mike up and strode purposely towards the machine. He hadn't had as many beers as Hiro but he'd had enough to make him a bit tipsy. He giggled as he searched through the songs, trying to keep his eyes focused enough to read the titles. After selecting a song he stared at the screen, waiting for the song to start.
I'd give anything to give me to you
Can you forget the world that you thought you knew
If you want me,
Come and find me
Nothing's stopping you so please release me
The song was different to the songs the boy had been singing. It had a darker air and this time Hiro could tell he was throwing his whole heart and soul into the song. Suguru's eyes met Hiro's and he smiled. As the next part of the song came he closed his eyes and got lost in the music.
I'll believe
All your lies
Just pretend you love me
Make believe
Close your eyes
I'll be anything for you
Nothing left to make me feel anymore
There's only you and everyday I need more
If you want me
Come and find me
I'll do anything you say just tell me
Hiro had a feeling that the song was directed at someone, but through a fuzzy haze of drunkenness he couldn't fathom it so he simple listened to the boy singing, smiling encouraging at the boy whenever their eyes met.
I'll believe
All your lies
Just pretend you love me
Make believe
Close your eyes
I'll be anything for you
I'll believe
All your lies
Just pretend you love me
Make believe
Close your eyes
I'll be anything for you
Anything for you
I'll become your earth and sky
Forever never die
I'll be everything you need
Suguru grew more confident with the song, his voice getting louder as the emotion poured out of him.
I'll believe
All your lies
Just pretend you love me
Make believe
Close your eyes
I'll be anything for you
I'll believe
All your lies
Just pretend you love me
Make believe
Close your eyes
I'll be anything for you
(AN: The reason I chose this song is because, like Suguru, I like someone who only sees me as a friend, and whenever I hear this song it makes me think of how I feel. The song's by Evanescence and is called "Anything for You". The song is awesome. The first song is by Ayumi Hamasaki and its called "Because of You", great song. )
As the song finished, Suguru almost collapsed. Sweat ran down his forehead and his eyes glittered from the effect of singing and alcohol. Hiro cheered loudly and Suguru bowed, giggling. They were both rather drunk and after and hour they only had one beer left between them.
Hiro practically gulped down the beer as if he hadn't drunk in ages. Suguru drank his, slowly savouring each gulp and giggling in between each swallow. The karaoke machine sat forgotten. They were beyond the ability to talk so they simply sat there, happy in each others company.
Hiro had completely forgotten about the incident with K. He'd forgotten about all his problems as the alcohol ate at his brain ,making everything delightfully fuzzy. Suguru's giggling was infectious and they were soon both laughing like idiots over nothing.
A steward came up, a man in his twenties. Suguru was sure he recognised him from the university. But he couldn't place him.
"Time's up guys," he said carefully, the drunk ones could get nasty sometimes. Hiro looked at him in confusion, as if wondering who he was and why he was here. Suguru, who'd had less to drink than Hiro, nodded and grabbed the man's arm.
"C'mon time to scat." Hiro didn't seem to want to move. He continued to stare at the man until Suguru managed to drag the man to his feet. Now to get him to walk. After much tugging Suguru persuaded Hiro to take a few steps. Hiro still stared at the man.
"I know you," he said pointing at the man, staring at him though slatted eyes.
"Yes, we go to the same university. I'm in your English class." Hiro paled at the mention of English. Memories of the empty kiss and the shame he'd felt assaulted his mind and he groaned, leaning heavily on Suguru.
Suguru only just managed to hold the heavier man upright, his legs buckled slightly. The other man smiled sympathetically at Suguru and walked to Hiro's other side to help him.
"I'll get you a cab if you like." Suguru nodded, not trusting his voice to work properly.
After stumbling out of the elevator the other man phoned a cab for them. They managed to stuff Hiro inside and the man with Suguru good luck dealing with his drunken friend. Suguru just grimaced and muttered a thanks.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Suguru stumbled through the halls, dragging the weight of the larger man. Hiro wasn't helping much. He kept muttering things and shouting out curses now and then. He dragged his feet and acted quite childish, saying he didn't want to leave and that he needed another drink. He even began whining when he realised he wasn't winning, begging Suguru to take him to some bar.
"C'mon Fujisaki, pwwweas?" Suguru just rolled his eyes, even though he was drunk he managed to gather enough of his senses to know going back out was a bad idea. He gave Hiro another shove in the side and yanked on his arm. Hiro whined pitifully and finally decided to help Suguru by walking, although he walked into a wall more often than not, at least Suguru didn't have to support the man's weight anymore.
Deciding it was better to take the drunk to his dorm, Suguru headed in that direction. Hiro didn't seem to notice, and, anyway, when asked where his keys were he gave Suguru a blank look.
Throwing open the door, Suguru took his shoes off and Hiro did the same. They didn't bother to put them neatly, just kicked them off and let them stay were they landed. Suguru felt the man's weight land on him again. He sighed as he turned to face his friend and took in a sharp breath. Hiro was crying, silent tears running rivers down his face.
"I'm such an idiot," he muttered in Suguru's shoulder. Suguru's heart went out to the man. Love could really stink, especially when you fell for the wrong person. He wrapped one arm around the man's waist and draped the man's arm over his shoulders so he could half-carry, half-drag the man to his room. He felt Hiro needed a bed more than he did.
Suguru had a small single dorm. It wasn't anything special, everything was compact and he had to be careful not to hit anything. He finally arrived at the bed room and walked in, he was about to lie the man on the bed when Suguru felt the whole of the man's weight fall on him and they both tumbled over into a heap on the bed. Suguru tried to get up but found he was pinned beneath the man's heavier form and no amount of wriggling would free him. Suguru sighed and smacked Hiro gently on the head.
"Hiro get up," he snapped angrily. No answer. Suguru frowned. "Hiro this isn't funny. Get. Up." Still no response.
"Hiiiiro," Suguru whined the alcohol still affecting him. He started to swat at Hiro as if he was an annoying fly but still the man didn't move. Suguru looked at Hiro's face and saw that he was asleep.
"Damn you," he muttered, not really meaning it. He gave Hiro one last punch before giving up. The man was in a drunken sleep and not even an atomic bomb would wake him now. So he snuggled up to his human blanket. They were both too drunk to care anyway. And Suguru was secretly happy. So he snuggled closer to the warmth of the taller man.
Suguru's head felt as if it were being beaten with a hammer and he had the sudden urge to throw up. The only reason he didn't was because he couldn't move, choking on his own vomit was not the way he planed to die. And anyway, it was so warm. He snuggled sleepily to the warmth before opening his eyes. He almost screamed when he saw Hiro's face.
"More beer," Hiro muttered in his sleep before rolling over, now pinning Suguru's arm under his body. Suguru winced but managed to take his arm back. He began to rub his limbs vigorously to try and wake them up. When he was sure he could stand without the fear of his legs going to sleep he stumbled to the bathroom. He really needed to be sick.
He stumbled to the bathroom and sank onto the floor in front of the toilet. He was glad he'd cleaned yesterday, the toilet smelled like toilet cleaner and not the smell of toilet. Although the smell of disinfectant made him want to throw up even more he decided it was better than toilet smell. He began to retch and was finally able to be sick.
After throwing up for what felt like ages, Suguru felt a little better, the pounding in his head hadn't stopped but at least he didn't feel like throwing up every five seconds. He stood with his back against the wall of the shower, letting the warm water wake his body up. He sighed as he felt the needles of water stab at his skin.
He turned his face up to meet the water and began to scrub at his hair. It felt horribly dirty and the smell of alcohol still lingered around him.
After the shower he towelled his body dry and threw on an over sized shirt and boxers, something he'd normally wear to bed but Suguru didn't feel like getting dressed, in fact he would have gone back to bed if Hiro wasn't currently in it.
Suguru walked sluggishly to the kitchen and found some hangover pills in the cupboard, he knew they'd come in handy. He swallowed them gratefully then got some ready for Hiro.
"All right sleeping beauty, get up," he said, smacking Hiro with a pillow. Hiro just rolled over away from the annoyance. Suguru growled and yanked on the man's arm trying to drag him out of bed.
"GET. UP." It was no use; Hiro was dead to the world. Suguru flopped down and sat on the bed glaring at Hiro, surprisingly it didn't work. It was then he got a wicked idea. Grinning slyly he walked out to the kitchen and poured a glass of water, making sure the water was especially cold. Then walking on tip-toe he sneaked into the bed room. Hiro had one more chance.
"Hiro, HIRO! GET UP!" No response. Well he asked for it. Sitting right next to the man, Suguru let the glass hover over Hiro for a minute before he threw the water over the man and jumped up so as to be out of the line of fire.
Hiro awoke spluttering and shouting a string of curses. Suguru watched from a safe distance, laughing his head off. That was a bad idea since his head ache came back to bug him ten fold then, but the image of Hiro's face looking utterly perplexed and soaked, hair plastered to his cheeks was just too funny.
Hiro narrowed his eyes and glared at the boy.
"What was that for?" Suguru shrugged.
"Well you wouldn't get up no matter how much I shouted at you, this was my last resort," Suguru said waving the glass. "Go have a shower and I'll get some breakfast ready." Hiro grudgingly got out of the bed and stomped to the bathroom.
"What time is it anyway?" Hiro called from the bathroom.
"3:15 PM," Suguru said putting emphasis on the pm. Hiro just groaned and climbed into the shower.
Suguru had already made breakfast by the time Hiro finished; Hiro came into the kitchen with a towel wrapped around his waist and nothing else.
"Hey, Fujisaki, can I borrow something to wear?" Suguru nodded trying not to blush but most of all trying not to stare. He tried not to show his disappointment when Hiro left and went to the bedroom.
Hiro came back wearing an oversized T-shirt Suguru normally wore for sleeping and some baggy shorts. Both were pretty big on Suguru but fitted Hiro nicely. When Hiro sat Suguru handed him a hangover pill and a glass of water. Hiro smiled gratefully, his head currently felt as if ten pneumatic drills were tap-dancing over his skull. He'd had a lot more to drink than Suguru.
A plate was pushed in Hiro's face and he felt the urge to hurl, the food looked lovely, but his stomach still felt very delicate. Suguru had already finished his breakfast and now ran his hand through his damp hair, eyes closed as if he were in great pain.
"Hangover?" Hiro chuckled. Suguru glared at him.
"Don't look at me like that, the getting-a-drink was your idea."
"I meant one or two not ten," Suguru snapped as he stood up and stormed into the living room. Hiro just laughed, he was a bad influence to Fuji-Chan. He smiled wickedly at the nickname he'd just come up with. Hiro sneaked into the living room to see Suguru sitting on the sofa glaring at the TV. Hiro snuck up behind him and drew closer until his mouth was right by Suguru's ear.
"What's the matter Fuji-Chan? Your first time getting drunk?" Hiro said in a singsong voice, Suguru yelped in surprise but then hit Hiro with a cushion.
(Interesting info: Kun is normally used for males, but when Chan is used for males it can either be a term of endearment or in teasing, right now Hiro's teasing Suguru, but you all probably knew this already.)
"Don't call me that, and yes."
Hiro just laughed again and sat next to the boy.
"Don't call you what, Fuji-Chan?" Suguru let out an inhuman roar and flew at Hiro with the little cushion.
Hiro laughed as he tried to fend off the angry teen but Suguru was surprisingly strong. Suguru managed knock both of them over and now sat on Hiro's abdomen and beating him with the cushion. Hiro held his hand up in defence. They soon both dissolved in a fit of laughter and Suguru let Hiro sit up.
"Ok, ok I think I get your point." Hiro grinned again and Suguru ignored him.
"I guess I should go talk to him," Hiro said quietly, so quietly Suguru wasn't sure if he was meant to hear. He looked at Hiro concern in his eyes but Hiro kept his attention firmly fixed on the TV.
"I'll come with you if you like." Hiro shook his head.
"Nah, I need to do this on my own, just stay here in case I need a shoulder to cry on ok." Suguru nodded offering a smile to his friend. Hiro gathered up his stuff and left, waving at Suguru as he shut the door.
The door clicked shut and Suguru was alone, he watched the door with worry filled eyes.
"Good luck Hiro," he whispered, smiling.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
After changing into his own clothes, Hiro strode purposely towards K-sensei's classroom. But every step he took, the closer he got, the more he felt like a condemned man walking to his death. He could already feel his body getting slick with sweat, his forehead was damn and his hair began to stick to his face. He couldn't do this, he couldn't face the man, he just couldn't.
He stopped outside the door of the classroom, by now all his resolve had flown away. He couldn't face it. He turned on his heel and was about to run when a hand descended on his shoulder holding him firmly in place.
"I think we nee to talk, Nakano-san," Hiro gulped. He knew that voice.
"Sit down." Hiro gulped and tried not to show his nervousness, but he was sure his traitorous body was giving him away. He could feel the sweat on his forehead. He didn't dare look up to meet K's gaze so he stared at the floor, counting the cracks in the tiles.
'1...2...3...'
"Nakano-San, what happened yesterday?" K said seriously.
'Don't listen don't look up, now where was I? 4...5...'
"Nakano-San?" Hiro winced and squeezed his eyes shut hoping K would disappear, but he didn't.
"I'm sorry," he muttered quietly, feeling like a child being scolded for breaking something.
"Nakano-San, is something troubling you?" Hiro didn't answer.
"You know Nakano-San, I have a wife and a kid, damn crazy wife, but I love her anyway. You'll find someone for you soon Nakano, but I'm not the one for you. Just open your eyes, the one you're looking for could be right in-front of you. Damn that sounded cheesy." Hiro still hadn't replied, he was starting to feel smaller and smaller. This wasn't K, he felt as if the man were mocking him, treating him like a child. Hiro would much rather he shout at him, shoot him and leave it at that, but this, this was much worse.
"I'm sorry," he muttered again, still not looking up. He suddenly wished he'd let Suguru come with him, just knowing his friend was outside the door would be of some comfort.
"Don't apologize. I'm sure you're worried about your friend; I heard what happened. But remember what I said, the one for you is out there somewhere. You may go." Hiro nodded still not facing the teacher as he stood; he hurried to the door before K changed his mind.
K ran his hand through golden locks and sighed. This was bad, very bad, he couldn't deal with emotions. He wasn't used to cheering people up or understanding how they feel. He was used to making a joke out of things, never taking things seriously. He shook his head still staring at the door Hiro had disappeared through.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
That was hell, he couldn't even look the man in the eye, there was no way he'd be able to face him in glass. It was just too uncomfortable. Maybe he could drop the class, but his parents would kill him, he was only allowed to take music because he promised them he'd take another useful subject too. Maybe he could change subjects? But there was nothing else that interested him.
He could leave, go to another college, but what about Shuichi? He couldn't leave him on his own, but Shuichi had Yuki now, did Shuichi really need Hiro anymore? Hiro slumped his shoulders dejectedly; he was at a loss for what to do.
Before he knew it he was outside Suguru's door again. He frowned. He was spending more time at Suguru's than he was at his own apartment. Oh well, it was better than dealing with Tatsuha.
He gently rapped the door with his knuckles and Suguru answered, giving him a small smile then stepping aside to let him in. They both sat on the sofa with a glass of water.
"How did it go?"
"Awfully," Hiro said, slumping in his seat and glaring at the TV as if it was its fault, "and I still have a hangover."
Suguru laughed and patted Hiro's shoulder.
"At least the worst part's out of the way now."
"I guess," Hiro stared at the TV, watching the images moving and changing but not really paying attention to what was happening. His brain registered it was an anime, but that was it. He felt a sudden weight fall against his shoulder and saw that Suguru's head now rested on his shoulder. The green hair tickled his neck and the boy's eyes were closed. His chest gently rose and fell in time with his breathing. Suguru had fallen asleep.
Hiro shook his head and smiled at the boy. He looked quite cute asleep. His features were relaxed, the permanent serious expression gone. His mouth, which normally lay in a thoughtful frown, was now in a relaxed smile. The short green hair barley touched his eyelids.
Hiro began to play with the hair, trying to mould it into spikes, but the hair refused to cooperate and fell back to where it was before. Hiro glared at the hair. He tried again and again to get the hair to obey him but as soon as his hand left the hair it would fall back to its flat state.
Half an hour passed with Hiro battling with the hair until he finally gave up. There was no point, the hair had won, for now at least.
'Just wait until you meet Mr. Hair Gel,' Hiro laughed in his head.
The anime wasn't too bad, some film, Hiro had caught the tail end of it so he was a bit confused, but it killed some time. Besides, Hiro didn't want to move in case he woke the boy. He knew how important it was to be able to sleep off a hangover, well to him it was.
Another show came on, it must be some anime channel, and so Hiro spent the next two hours watching anime.
When Suguru finally opened his eyes Hiro could no longer feel his arm. He knew killer pins and needles were to come, but right now it be a welcome change to distract him from the pain in his head.
Suguru yawned loudly holding his hand over his mouth, mouth stretching so wide Hiro would have seen what the boy had for breakfast if he cared to look. Suguru sat up sleepily, blinking the sleep from his eyes.
Without Suguru's head resting on his shoulder the blood was allowed to flow freely into Hiro arm, bringing with it the worst pins and needles Hiro ever had.
"Ouch ouch ouch!" Hiro muttered as he rubbed his arm trying to bring feeling back to it.
"Sorry," Suguru muttered, Hiro just shook his head.
"It's fine. The least I could do. I hope I made a comfy pillow anyway." Suguru looked thoughtful for a second.
"Ok I guess, a bit lumpy though." Hiro faked a look of surprise and hurt.
"Fine. Last time you get to use my arm as a pillow. Damn pins and needles." He shouted still rubbing his arm trying to bring it to life. "What time is it?"
"6:30." Suguru collapsed back into the sofa.
"You wanna go visit Shuichi again? We still have time." Suguru asked, Hiro shook his head.
"I hate hospitals and I hate seeing him like that, I'll go visit when he wakes up," There was no need to say if he wakes up, they were both thinking it.
They sat in an uncomfortable silence, both thinking about Shuichi, hoping he'd be ok. Hiro felt guilty for going out last night, but as soon as Suguru suggested it he'd felt the need to drown his sorrows.
'Some friend I am,' he said to himself as he ran a hand through long dark hair. Suguru yawned again.
"I'm off to bed. You can stay or go or whatever, I just need to sleep." Suguru slouched off to his room, already looking half asleep. Hiro watched him leave but didn't move, he sat there in silence for a second before getting up to turn the TV down a bit. He still wasn't up to facing Tatsuha.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Eiri sat vigil at Shuichi's bedside, a Nittle Grasper song playing in the background. There was no change in Shuichi condition. The nurse said it was good, they had expected his condition to deteriorate. He'd been in a bad way when he'd been bought in and they hadn't expected him to make it.
As each day went by, hope grew brighter. At least that's what the nurse said, or words to that effect.
So the longer Shuichi held on, the more hope he'd recover. Eiri just wished the boy would wake up.
Eiri kept a tight grip on Shuichi's hand, his body had grown warmer and now his skin held a pinkish tone. He looked a lot better, but his face seemed to be drawn and he looked skinnier, not noticeably, but every day he'd looked smaller and smaller.
It was the third day now, or so Eiri thought. He'd lost track of time. He was always in the hospital now. He'd even managed to bribe the nurses, with copies of his book signed, to let him stay the night as well. He wanted to stay by Shuichi's side all day, just in case the boy woke up.
He wanted to be there when he woke up, he didn't want to Shuichi to wake up alone.
"Gomen nasai, gomen nasai," the boy shouted as he ran. The walls were painted red and a monster chased him. A monster covered in blood. And there was no escape, and it was all his fault.
"Please don't hurt me again. I'm sorry." The footsteps were getting closer, his hands stung demanding attention. But he daren't look, if he looked he see the stains of red. The ones that would never come off.
Pink hair stuck to wet cheeks as the boy stumbled. And the monster grew closer and closer. His heart beat treacherously loudly, blood pounding in his ears.
The monster was going to get him. There was no hope of escape. He didn't even know why he bothered to run. He heard the heavy footfalls drawing nearer and nearer.
"Gomen..." A knife clattered to the floor, splashed with crimson.
The monster was right behind him, breathing down his neck, sending shivers down his spine.
But the strong hands never came, they never wrapped their crushing might around his small arms, instead he was enveloped in light. Who?
Amethyst eyes met golden ones. A kind face with blond hair. A pair of white wings wrapped around the two like a shield and the blonde's arms wrapped around the boy.
'Who are you,' the boy thought but he daren't speak.
"Shuichi, come back."
"Who's Shuichi? ...Am I Shuichi?"
"Yes."
"I forgot…I'm so tired."
"Come back, we're waiting for you. We miss you."
"Who misses me?
"Your friends...me."
"Who are you?"
"Eiri." the boy closed his eyes and rested his head against the blonde's chest. Eiri. He remembered now, the man he had trusted so easily. But why? He didn't understand it himself. But Eiri was safety, warmth, something he hadn't felt for a long, long time, and he was someone who could frighten away his nightmares. Someone who was there.
"I remember...Eiri." The blond smiled and held the boy tighter.
"Am I dreaming?"
"Maybe."
The boy wrapped his arms around the blonde pulling him closer.
'I want to go back, go back to my friends...back to Eiri.'
"How?"
"You'll find a way," Lips descended gently on his head, kissing his temple tenderly.
"Come back to us Shuichi."
'Yes, I'll find a way, because... I want to see him again.'
A monitor bleeped slightly and Eiri jumped fearing the worst, but it wasn't the heart monitor. It still gave out its steady bleeping. Some other monitor had made the sound, Eiri didn't care which one, as long as Shuichi was still ok, the nurse would come if it was important.
Eiri gently stroked the pink hair. It was starting to get dull, but it still held its beauty. He gently kissed the boy's temple.
"Come back to us, Shuichi."
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Hiro woke up to a dark room, the TV an annoying buzzing noise and the only source of light. He stretched slightly to work out the aches in his joints from falling asleep on the sofa.
A glance at the clock told him it was 11 o'clock, it wasn't very late but Hiro was tired. He decided to go back to his dorm. He needed a nice comfy bed. He knocked lightly on the bedroom door but there was no answer. Opening it a crack, he saw Suguru curled up, the covers knotted around him and hugging his pillow, dead to the world. Hiro shook his head and shut the door tightly.
Suguru was so serious when he was awake and looked like such a kid when he slept. Hiro found it rather cute.
Hiro left Suguru's dorm and quietly sneaked down the corridors to his own.
He quietly sneaked into his dorm, trying no to disturb Tatsuha. The man was currently passed out on the couch. Hiro was glad. He sneaked into his room and crashed onto the bed, glad for its familiar warmth.
Hiro stood outside the headmaster's door again, twiddling his thumbs. He'd come to a decision, but somehow he'd rather face K again than talk to the headmaster... Then again maybe not, it was why he was here after all. He though back on what had led him here.
Hiro had woken up feeling really down, so down, in fact, that he hadn't wanted to get out of bed. He just threw the blankets over his head and went back to sleep, or at least he tried. But now the drink had completely loosened its grip on his system and he kept thinking of the American. Of the kiss. Of Shuichi in hospital. Too many thoughts were assaulting his mind, he felt as if his head were going to explode.
His guts curled in a tight knot at the thought of going to class, facing K. It was a horrible thought. He had the rest of the course, about four years and he would have to face K all those days, months and years.
He tossed and turned until he lay on his back, glaring at the ceiling. He could quit the class, he really wanted to, but his parents would kill him and probably cut his money. They were the only way he currently managed to stay in the University.
But...he didn't know if he could stay, he'd rather change universities than keep the English class. Maybe, maybe his parents would let him change universities.
He sat there in silence after that thought. Could he leave? The main reason he'd come to this University was for Shuichi, but now he had Yuki and seemed happy to be with him. Suguru would find new friends. Hiro wasn't needed.
He could escape and never see that American again!
Filled with determination, he dressed and headed for the headmasters office.
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Now he felt deflated and all his sureness left him. He was filled with doubt, Shuichi would kill him. His parents would have to dig up his body to kill him again, and then for good measure Suguru would probably burn the remains. He was dead.
"Nakano-San, you may go in now."
'Great,' he muttered. He nodded his thanks to the secretary and entered.
"Nakano-San is something wrong?"
Hiro strode over to the desk and took a seat. He felt his resolve return as he thought of English class. He stared the man behind the desk straight in the eye.
"I want to switch Universities." The head raised his eyebrow.
"Why?"
"I just do," Hiro growled angrily, there was no way he could tell him the real reason. The man took off his glasses and rubbed his temple.
"Look Nakano, you're emotionally unstable now. You have allot on your mind."
'What the hell? I came to see the headmaster not a psychiatrist.' Hiro thought but he didn't voice his thought, merely showed them in the death glare of death glares.
"I want to change schools, can't you just except that?"
The head teacher sighed. "Ok, how about a compromise? Think about it for a month. If after a month you still want to leave, then I shall arrange the paperwork." Hiro clenched and unclenched his fists.
"Fine," he said through gritted teeth before storming out.
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
After music class was dinner. Hiro and Suguru ate in a corner of the cafeteria in silence. Hiro was still fuming and Suguru was afraid to say anything in case Hiro's wrath turned on him. But after a whole class of Hiro's mutterings and glares and a dinner spent worried for the table's safety, Suguru had had enough.
"Hiro what's wrong?" Hiro turned a dark glare on Suguru, enough to make mass murderers call for mommy but Suguru didn't even flinch. Hiro's hands were wrapped around the edge of the table his knuckles turning as white as the rice he was eating.
"Nothing," he snapped, still looking as if he were trying to snap the table in half.
"Looks like nothing," Suguru said sceptically. Hiro just growled again and let the table go.
"That damn man thinks he knows everything."
"Who?"
"The head teacher thinks he knows how if feeling and shit. Why won't he just let me change schools like I wanted? DAMN HIM!" he said loudly snapping the chopstick he'd just picked up in half in his fist. There was a deadly silence as everyone's attention focused on Hiro for a second, but the sight of the fuming teen caused everyone to look away quickly.
Suguru sat there in utter shock, an unreadable expression on his face. Hiro was still muttering angrily until his eyes fell on Suguru's shell shocked face, the mutterings died in his throat.
"You're leaving?" Suguru said quietly, as if he couldn't quite believe what his friend had told him.
"I...yeah...in a month," Hiro said quietly.
"Why?" Suguru's voice was still quiet and emotionless. It scared Hiro.
"I can't face his class." Something slammed onto the table hard causing silence to fall in the room. Startled, Hiro looked up to see Suguru standing; his fist trembled on the table top, turning red from the force of hitting the table. He eyes were shining with unshed tears.
"What about your friends? What about Shuichi? What about me!"
"You'll make new friends, you don't need me. And Shuichi has Yuki."
"BAKA!" The tears were running down his cheeks now and his shoulders shook as he tried to hold back the sobs.
"You're my first friend here, the only one who doesn't look at me and see some kid. Everyone thinks I'm full of myself or something because I came here early, but I didn't ask for it. You were the first one to treat me as a normal person. Shuichi has Yuki, do you think I want to hang around with the love birds for the rest of my time in University? I'll gag if I have to. I don't want you to leave." he added quietly.
"But I can't stay, I just..."
"What about Shuichi? Isn't he enough reason for you to stay? What about me?"
"I...I just can't..." The table was slammed again and Suguru was now crying unashamedly. He was at a total loss for words. He shook his head and closed his eyes, hiding the tears from Hiro.
"Baka," he whispered before running away, still trying to hold back the tears.
"Fujisaki," Hiro whispered quietly. He hadn't expected the teen to act like that. He'd looked hurt, as if Hiro deciding to leave was something to do with him. And it killed Hiro to see him cry, he'd looked so vulnerable, and it was all Hiro's fault.
"Fujisaki, wait!" he shouted and got up to run after the teen.
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
"Fujisaki! Fujisaki! Where are you?" Hiro was nearly tearing his hair out looking for the teen. One thing he'd learned about Suguru was the teen could run fast.
Hiro ran through the doors and into the sunlight, the grounds were packed. Students sat on any and every available space. Hiro growled in frustration. He looked over the heads of every student for a familiar green one, but the only green visible was the grass.
"Damn," he muttered kicking at the dirt. If this was how Fujisaki acted he'd hate to see Shuichi's reaction.
"I can't do anything right," he muttered to himself and began walking, hoping to find Suguru.
ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
"Baka, baka, baka," Suguru chanted as he ran, ran away from Hiro. He didn't want him to see him crying. He wouldn't let him see his tears. Suguru ran through the doors, almost knocking a girl over. She shouted after him angrily but he didn't stop, wouldn't stop. He carried on running until he reached a quiet area of the university grounds. It was largely shaded by some trees and the grey building also added to the darkness.
Suguru sat on the cold ground and leaned against the trunk of the nearest tree. He bought his knees up to his face and wrapped his arms around his legs, letting his tears flow onto his knees.
"Baka," he muttered to himself, "why are you crying?"
Suguru closed his eyes tightly and tried to banish the tears, but they refused, stubbornly, and continued to run from his eyes down his cheek.
"Suguru, are you ok?" Looking up Suguru was met with the concerned gaze of his cousin.
"Tohma?" The blonde knelt down in the grass next to his cousin and wrapped his arms around the small shoulders, pulling the smaller boy against his chest.
"Suguru, it's ok, shh," Suguru couldn't hold back his tears any longer. They were already escaping anyway, so he let them free. He snaked his arms around the taller blonde and buried his head in his cousin's chest and wept. Tohma held the boy tightly, gently rubbing his back in comfort.
Silence fell after a while but the two didn't move. Tohma still held Suguru tightly and Suguru was unwilling to let go.
"Are you ok now?" Suguru nodded and gently pulled back to face Tohma.
"Sorry, I got you all wet," Tohma just smiled.
"That's ok, I needed a shower anyway." This broke a small laugh from the younger boy and even Tohma's eye twinkled slightly, but he seemed to remember why he was here and a serious expression fell on his face.
"I feel almost guilty bringing you this news. You're already upset."
Suguru shook his head. "I'm fine, what is it?"
Tohma sighed.
"He's out. I couldn't do anything. I'm sorry. He should rot in jail."
Suguru didn't seem affected by the news. He just stared at the ground. "I see."
"I'm sorry Suguru, just... just be careful ok. He might come after you."
"He won't, he doesn't care about me," Suguru smiled at his cousin to reassure him. Tohma didn't seem convinced.
"Just be careful ok." Suguru nodded.
"Well, I have to go now. I'm sorry I can't stay any longer. I suppose Eiri is at the hospital with Shindou-San. Am I right?"
"Probably."
"Ok, I'll go there then. Are you sure you're ok now, Suguru."
"Hai."
Suguru watched his cousin leave, the smile still in place to reassure the blond. He watched as the blond turned the corner and disappeared from view. Still he smiled the fake, forced smile. It took him a few seconds to realize his cousin had left before the smile broke. He sighed again, a sad look now in his face and eyes.
"He's out," Suguru muttered quietly. His shoulders slumped forward slightly and he suddenly felt so very tired, he just wanted to curl up and go to sleep.
And so, curling up into a ball, his back against the tree, Suguru closed his eyes and let the blackness of dreamless sleep take him.
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YAY! So there you go please, please, olease review! Each review makes me want to write more. Chapter 11 will be better i promis, in fact Shuichi will wake in chapter 11 i promis. Shuichi still needs the get well cards! So keep writing Shuichi runs in and kissed and glomps each person whos has send a card or reviewed
HEY YOUR SUPPOSED TO BE IN HOSPITAL! (chases Shuichi with a frying pan(
Eiri: If you haven't been scared off yet see you in the next chapter (chases after Angelic so she cant hurt his Shu-baby)
