Soo, I know you liked the last chapter:) thanks so much you guys for you're reviews! It gets even more interesting here, so get ready:) remember to review for me guys, I love each and every one of them:) Enough chat, on with the story!

Alone

What was I supposed to say to that? Was I supposed to run up to him, apologizing, and taking him back? Or was I supposed to tell him off, make him feel worse...and myself? Well, either one of those things were pretty stupid, but I couldn't really believe that he was telling the truth, so I went off.

"What. The. Hell. I have cut myself, thrown up, though about hurting myself really seriously, had illusions, lost friends, and went through absolute hell since you left. I haven't eaten...or slept...and I have cried more than should be possible. I have missed you...wanted you so bad...even prayed for you to come back..I have never felt worse about myself. Stan Alto...yes, the bastard who hates me, told me if I ever needed anything to ask him...My best friends have left for some unknown reason.. I have pretty much Driven Adrian away, and now Seth is going to be killed. And you walk in, apologize, and want me to be comforted, and take you back? Dimitri? What damn planet from the deepest pit of hell are you from? I diedwhen you left, and I've been dying ever since! And now you come back into my life, and are dangling in front of me while I burn inside. I want to take you back... I want nothing more...But my heart just can't take it. I can't trust you. "

I couldn't believe myself. I had ben dying for him, and now I was turning him away. But the more I thought about it, the more I got pissed at him, so the more I believed in my choice. I just wish he wouldn't have been such a dick.

Dimitri got up, and started towards the door. "I understand...It's too soon. I hope one day you'll change your mind..but for now there is nothing i can do. I love you, Roza."

That pissed me off even more.

"You're just going to leave like that? You're not going to try anymore! Dimitri, you clearly do not want me back!" I screamed at him, making him flinch. He let go of the door handle, and turned towards me, and looked me directly in the eyes.

He still had those dark brown eyes I wanted to look in forever. But they were sad now, and they had never been so vulnerable, or humble. I decided to check the rest of him out while he was deciding what to say. His long brown hair was completely out of his pony tail, and God it looked sexy. He had on a black tee, with jeans, and of course his duster. But wait, it wasn't his duster. It was a normal jacket, which was strange. But still, his body looked great, and his face was still an angels, just pained. He opened his mouth to talk, so I looked back in his eyes.

"Rose, you told me no. I will always love you. I respect your space though, I'm not going to force you into it, or beg, or stay and drive you crazy. i want you to take your time. If I have to wait the rest of my life, I will. But I'm not going to hurt you again."

I hadn't noticed it, but he had taken a few steps closer, but so had I.

"Dimitri...I just. I love you. But I can't take any more hurt." By this time we were a foot apart.

"You don't have to." He whispered. Only inches.

"I-..." and no more space. Enough to talk, but I couldn't, because I was crying again. Dimitri broke the last inch between our lips, and even though I wanted to run and hide before I let myself give in, take him back, and get hurt, I still kissed him back. it felt so good...it almost tied with the time when we had sex, but only because I thought I would never have him again. And I sill thought that, and that's why I continued to take advantage of this situation. I was pushed gently back to the wall, and then the bed. All the time I was thinking...yes, please, but my stomach felt all wrong. What if he just wanted another job, and then left again? My brain didn't register that though until his shirt was off. Thats when I pulled back, took his hands out from my shirt, and threw them off of me.

"This is all you want from me..." I said, breathless. Dimitri actually looked hurt and surpirised that i said that.

"Roza..no..we don't have to.." he said, quickly getting off of me.

"Get out." I said, before I could change my mind. He didn' move. "Get OUT!" And that time, he quickly left, without his shirt, and I immediately broke down.

I was tired of crying, but I knew that this wasn't the end of it. I was extremely pissed at somebody else..

"She better answer her damn phone." I said while tapping my feet. Lissa was asleep, but I knew she heard her phone.

"Rose?" She asked, barely awake.

"How could you?" I asked her, and she sat strait up, completely awake.

"How could I what?" she replied, kind of worried.

"You know exactly what. Dimitri's here. I can't believe you Lissa."

"What! He's at the Academy? We haven't even found him yet!" She almost screamed in the phone. I heard Christian mumble 'What is it babe?' in the background.

"You know you sent him here. I am completely screwed, I don't know what to do. I didn't know that you could be this...this just ugh. You know how much I was dying inside, and I'm sure you knew that this was going to make it worse." I was being so awful to Liss, but I think she deserved it. Sending Dimitri here...the worst part was that she lied about it.

"Rose, please, listen to me. We left to find him, but i would never make him go back, I knew it would kill you. We were going to ask him things, maybe torture him a bit, and see if he was sorry. If he was, we were going to wean you back to him, but nothing all at once. I'm not like that, Rose." She was serious, and almost crying. I was doing some pretty stupid things tonight.

"Whatever. Thanks so much." And I hung up. Not only did Irun to the bathroom to throw up, again, but I hated myself. I was alone, again. And it was my fault...

So? :D Good, bad? I know I'm driving everyone away, and I really wanted to say ," Oh Dimitri, I love you too, and lets live happily ever after!" And ended the story there, but then it would suck, so here ya go:) Please review, thanks, and i love you:)
-taylor(: