So I realized something. My math was off at the beginning of the series which means that Ainsley is actually a year younger than I told you she is. Everything got so jumbled up in my head that I had to sit down and write out a timeline and all of a sudden I realized that I kept jumping forward but not actually thinking about the exact amount of time that had passed. So here is the timeline as I figured it out (the actual years are just based on when the show started but because the show split the intern year across two seasons it doesn't line up the same exactly):
October 2004: Derek met and slept with Renee Martin (this is not true to the show because he was in Seattle a long time before Meredith in the TaTA universe)
July 2005: Derek and Meredith meet. Meredith starts her internship.
July 8, 2005: Ainsley is born.
July 2006: Derek and Meredith get married.
September 25, 2006: Christopher is born.
May 8, 2008: Jacob is born.
August 2010: Derek and Meredith find out about Ainsley.
March 2011: Derek and Meredith are granted custody of Ainsley.
April 2011: Renee Martin dies.
April 2012: Meredith gets pregnant.
Anything that doesn't currently fit into this timeline is wrong. Maybe someday I'll go back and fix it…but probably not. Now that I got all that straightened out and I'm not just ambiguously throwing out random periods of time, here is the continuation of the story.
Derek pulled into the school parking lot and maneuvered the SUV into the visitor parking space. He pulled the key from the ignition and slid from the seat putting his hand to his back pocket to ensure his wallet with his driver's license was tucked in place. The car sounded from behind him as he clicked the lock button ensuring that the doors were locked before making his way into the building. Meredith had called the school and explained that Ainsley was only going to be attending half days on Wednesdays for awhile until they were able to change her appointments with Dr. Weller, but Derek dreaded the protocol the school had in place for early pick-ups. He knew that he had appreciated the added security when he and Meredith had chosen the school, but actually being subjected to it was annoying. He opened the door and immediately made his way across the corridor to the main office. The receptionist looked up from her computer screen and addressed him.
"Can I help you?" she asked sweetly.
Derek grimaced at the false enthusiasm in her voice before replying, "Derek Shepherd. Here to pick up Ainsley Shepherd."
"Okay. I need your driver's license," she said before starting to dig through a pile of papers on the desk.
Derek pulled out his driver's license and placed it on the counter waiting for further instructions.
She scanned the license into the computer and tapped her fingers on the desk impatiently while she waited for the scan to appear on the screen. When it finally did, her keys moved quickly across the keys as she pulled up Ainsley's record and checked Derek's name against the file. Derek heard the printer jump to life and a sheet of paper appear on top. The receptionist moved quickly pulling the sticker off the paper and sticking it onto the sheet of paper before her.
"I'm going to call her down. You need to fill out the paperwork and sign her out," she explained handing him the sheet of paper.
Derek grumbled "thank you" as he grabbed a pen from the cup on the counter and began jotting down the answers to the questions in front of him. Ainsley appeared just as he was finishing the paperwork.
"Did you make sure to ask Mrs. Jacobs for your work for this afternoon?" Derek asked Ainsley as he handed the paperwork back to the receptionist.
"She told me that she put everything in my folder and she gave me papers for Mrs. Weston," Ainsley replied, moving to peek over the counter.
Derek pulled the sign-out sheet toward him, filling in the necessary blanks and pushing it back to its designated space. The receptionist finally returned his license and said goodbye to Ainsley, allowing Derek to lead her from the school and to the car. Once they were in route to Dr. Weller's office, Derek peeked back at Ainsley in the rearview mirror.
"You know, Dr. Weller wants me to come in on your session today?" Derek said, watching as Ainsley gaze moved from the window to the back of his seat.
"Oh," she replied.
"Are you okay with that? If I'm in there?" Derek asked.
"What if I say something that makes you mad?" Ainsley questioned as she began to play with her hands nervously.
"Well…there might be some things that I don't understand when you first say them, and that is why Dr. Weller is there. We're going to work together so that I can understand," Derek tried to explain to the best of his ability.
Ainsley sat quietly as if in contemplation and Derek decided not to push it and the rest of the short car ride was spent in silence. They pulled up to the building housing Dr. Weller's office and pulled into a parking space before making their way into the building. When they made their way into the therapy room a mere half hour later, Dr. Weller directed Derek to sit on a couch and Ainsley immediately jumped into his lap. Dr. Weller took up chair next to them and pulled out Ainsley's file.
"Okay….First, did you bring in your feelings journal Ainsley?" Dr. Weller asked.
Ainsley nodded holding up the book before placing it in his outstretched hand. He flipped the book open, thumbing through the pages of misspelled words written in a messy child's scrawl.
"She's definitely the daughter of a doctor," Dr. Weller joked, attempting to clear some of the nervous energy in the room.
Derek smiled lightly at Ainsley who looked up at him obviously not getting the joke.
"Alright, let me explain what we are going to do here. We're going to do a lot of talking today and some playing, but mostly what we are trying to do today is make you feel better Ainsley," Dr. Weller explained, looking intently at both Derek and Ainsley.
Derek nodded and Ainsley looked at Derek again.
"Okay. So I read in your journal that something made you really mad this weekend. Can you tell me a little more about what happened?" Dr. Weller asked.
Ainsley slid silently down Derek's legs and settled on the floor in front of him, pulling a pad of paper and box of markers in front of her. They waited in silence for a moment, Derek looking at Ainsley's back and then at Dr. Weller worriedly. Dr. Weller simply held his finger up, silently bidding him to be patient.
"Ainsley? Do you not want to talk about that right now?" the psychologist prodded.
"Christopher was being annoying," she finally huffed as she pulled a marker purposefully across the paper.
"What was he doing that made you mad?" Dr. Weller prompted.
"I asked him to get out of my room because I was reading and he kept coming in there," Ainsley explained, a slight attitude in her voice.
Derek was at a loss. Ainsley had never made a peep about her brother's attachment to her. They all seemed to get along so well, that he and Meredith never knew that Ainsley wanted her own space.
"Well Ainsley, I think we all get a little annoyed when someone is bothering us," Dr. Weller nodded, "what do you think Dr. Shepherd?"
Derek sat silent for a moment, trying to organize his thought into some sort of comprehendible dialogue.
"I didn't know you felt that way," he finally sighed.
"Not all the time," Ainsley replied, shooting a sly glance over her shoulder at Derek, "I love him, but sometimes I want to be by myself."
"We're going to make sure that your brothers give you some space every once and awhile," Derek nodded, his gaze shifting back to Dr. Weller.
"What about this other day? It says you were sad," Dr. Weller noted.
Ainsley shrugged, returning to the paper in front of her.
"Are you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Derek prompted, taking the lead from Dr. Weller.
Ainsley shook her head and Dr. Weller smiled lightly even as Derek's face took on a defeated frown.
"How about we play a game?" Dr. Weller asked, moving to the bookshelves against the wall.
Ainsley simply nodded and Derek tracked his movement through the room with interest. He grabbed a box, moving toward the table across the room and motioning Derek and Ainsley to join him.
"Okay. This is one of my favorite games," Dr. Weller explained as he set up Candy Land.
"I've played this game before," Ainsley exclaimed her eyes brightening.
They began the game in silence, but quickly Dr. Weller was initiating a conversation with Ainsley.
"So. Who played this game with you?" Dr. Weller asked.
"My mom. My old mom," she replied, her emphasis on the word old noticed by both of the adults in the room.
"You've never told me about her," Dr. Weller prompted.
"She wasn't very nice," Ainsley sighed, "I don't think she liked me very much. Not like Meredith does."
Derek couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips at the mention of Meredith.
"Why don't you think she liked you?" Dr. Weller asked, barely concealing the concern on his face.
"She never wanted me around," Ainsley shrugged, "she always told me that I needed to take care of myself because she wasn't going to."
Derek visibly sank hearing those words spill from his baby girl's mouth. He looked to Dr. Weller for some sort of guidance, but he was scribbling furiously on his notepad. He finally pulled Ainsley's hand into his own larger one and shifted her into his lap, hugging her tightly against his chest and kissing the top of her head gently.
"Ainsley, how did you feel when you lived with your mother?" Dr. Weller asked after a few moments.
"Sad," she replied quietly.
"And what about now? Do you like living with your dad and Meredith?" he questioned, this time shooting a quick glance at Derek.
"Yeah. I like it a lot better there," Ainsley replied as she began to play with the hand Derek still had grasped around her.
They continued to play for a while, eventually going back to the feelings journal and working through some more of the entries, but Derek's mind was stalled on the conversation about Renee. When the time was finally up, Dr. Weller sent Ainsley into the waiting room to retrieve a sticker from Cheryl and turned to Derek.
"I think we've really reached the route of the problem. Ainsley is still somewhat unsure of her place in the family and I think it has a lot to do with the fact that she felt unwanted for so long," Dr. Weller explained.
"Is there anything we can do? To reassure her?" Derek asked.
"Including her in the process is going to be important. It will make her feel like she's wanted and she really cherishes time alone with both you and Meredith. I would suggest some one on one time with her. Reassure her that she is still just as important to you and will always be that way," Dr. Weller answered reaching out to shake Derek's hand.
Derek nodded, thanking the doctor before retrieving Ainsley from the waiting room and making his way to the car with her in tow. He immediately pulled out his phone sending a quick text to Meredith that he and Ainsley wouldn't be home until later before finally pulling out of the parking lot. He drove for several minutes before finally deciding where he wanted to go. They had only been driving for a few minutes before Ainsley seemed to recognize the direction they were heading.
"Are we going to the hospital?" she asked, her head cocked to the side in a gesture that was so familiar it jerked at his already frazzled emotion.
"Just for a minute. I need to grab something," he replied.
A silence settled over the car once again until Derek pulled out his phone. He dialed the number hoping that its intended target wasn't caught up in surgery.
"Hey," Mark answered.
"Hey. I need you to do me a favor. Go to my office and grab that file from my drawer with the name Al James on it and bring it to me. I'll be outside the main entrance," Derek ordered.
"And you can't come in and get it because?" Mark replied sarcastically even as he began to make his way to the office.
"Because I asked you to do it for me," Derek snarked back.
"Okay fine. I'll just stop saving lives and run an errand for you," Mark sighed dramatically before hanging up without another word.
"You're Uncle Mark is annoying," he directed at Ainsley.
Her eyes went wide and her mouth settled into a rounded "o," a face he had seen countless times and knew as the face that proceeded a bought of tattling. He finally pulled up to the main entrance to the hospital and watched the doors for Mark. After several minutes he finally emerged, squinting into the parking lot before finally beginning to approach. He walked to the driver's side door and Derek immediately pushed the button to lower the window.
"Here, but don't think I am going to be your errand boy from now on. This was a onetime thing," Mark said as he placed the folder into Derek's out stretched hand.
"I didn't want to have to get Ainsley out of the car and go all the way upstairs for one file," Derek replied, placing it into the passenger seat next to him.
"Hiya, beautiful," Mark said leaning further into the car so that he could see Ainsley on the other side of the back seat.
"Daddy said you're annoying," Ainsley tattled with a pointed look at Derek.
"He did? Well he's not such a walk in the park himself," Mark smirked with a light jab to Derek's shoulder.
"Thanks," Derek chuckled pushing Mark back out the window, "by the way mom called me. She said you told her she needed to come here for Christmas this year."
"Yeah. I told her that with the pregnancy and everything it would be easier," Mark shrugged.
"You do realize that you just gave all the sisters permission to descend on Seattle like a flock of…some really scary bird I can't seem to think of," Derek joked.
"Yeah well…they can stay with you," Mark replied, turning quickly and rushing away before Derek could argue.
"See I told you. He's annoying," Derek joked before pulling out of the parking lot and driving toward his next destination.
So next chapter is the big Derek/Ainsley show down…and by show down I mean they are going to have a much needed talk. This was a really long chapter (as in the longest chapter since maybe the car crash chapter in the TaTA…and I think it's longer than that one). That is part of the reason it took a little longer to get up…and also because every time I tried to finish it I would start fretting about the finale and then I just couldn't write. You should review because we have a shiny new review button and we don't want him to feel like the new kid that everyone ignores.
