AN: I'm so sorry, I completely forgot to update on Wednesday! I didn't even notice until right now, when I was about to upload this chapter! Sorry, won't happen again :)
There will only be two more chapters after this one, Chapter 13 on Wednesday and Chapter 14 next Saturday! As I said, there might be an Epilog, but I haven't written one yet, so that might take a while, if I decide to write one! I will let you know when I upload the last chapter!
Also, I know it's annoying but I have only gotten one review since the last three chapters (Thank you to the one person who left the review ;) ) so it would be great if you could leave some! They always make my day :)
Ok, sorry for the rambling! I hope you like this chapter!
When Stiles woke up the next morning all the memories of last night flooded his mind. He still couldn't believe that they had kissed and that Lydia had finally accepted her feelings for him. He could sense that she was awake, just like almost every morning, but she pretended to be asleep as usual.
The first time he had been bold enough to touch her in the morning was once when he had been completely sure that she was asleep. He had sensed the moment she was starting to wake up and had casually stopped his movements so she wouldn't notice. But on the third day he had heard her breath hitch ever so slightly when he had touched her and from then on he had been able to tell when she was asleep and when she wasn't.
When she pretended to be asleep her breathing was too even and too low. He couldn't really explain it but it was like she was trying too hard to make it seem as if she was asleep and that's what gave her away. When she didn't protest against his touches, he made it a habit and he soon noticed that she enjoyed these mornings just as much as he did.
He would always trace circles on her back and comb his hand through her hair carefully and sometimes he would even place kisses onto her head. Once he had noticed that she was pretending to be asleep, just so she could feel his hands in her hair and on her back, he had gotten bolder and the forehead kisses had become more frequent.
He smiled to himself when he noticed her breath changing when she noticed that he had woken up and started by placing a lingering kiss onto her forehead. He could feel Lydia supressing a shiver and fought against the chuckle that threatened to escape his lips. His hands started wandering over her back and into her hair and his other hand cupped her hand that was lying on his chest.
"Just so you know, I know that you're only pretending to be asleep..." Stiles informed her casually and he felt Lydia holding her breath. She seemed to be debating if she should deny it and keep pretending to be sleeping, but then she turned her head towards his slowly and looked at him with wide eyes.
"Why did you never call me out on it?" she asked shyly and a little embarrassed.
"Because you obviously weren't ready and I wanted to give you the time you needed." he said sincerely. "And because I was afraid those moments weren't going to happen again if I mentioned them", he added with a smirk.
"That's probably what would have happened..." she admitted, smiling up at him and for a second he was worried that she might have changed her mind over night. "But not anymore", she added before leaning up to claim his lips. A relieved sigh escaped his lips and then he was kissing her back and he still had a hard time grasping that this was actually happening.
After deciding that it was time to get up and have breakfast, they went to the lake together to follow their morning routine. Sometimes Lydia would find Stiles staring at her, shaking his head in disbelief. That's when she would walk over to him and kiss away all of the doubts, until he was certain that this was real.
Other times, Stiles would simply grab Lydia's hand and pull her towards him at which she giggled and seriously started to question herself. Why the hell had she ignored him for so long and not accepted her feelings sooner? She could have had this for so long already but she had been too scared and stubborn.
They were sitting on the beach, curled up in each other. Lydia was sitting in front of Stiles with her back pressed against his chest and his arms around her waist when Stiles noticed Lydia's mood change. She didn't mean to ruin the mood but with every kiss and touch from Stiles she was reminded of how bad she had treated him in the beginning and how much time she had wasted.
Stiles had felt her stiffen when he had placed a kiss to the side of her head and even though he was sure of Lydia's feelings for him, he couldn't help but worry that she had changed her mind.
"What's wrong?" Stiles whispered into her ear and caused Lydia to shiver.
"Nothing, nothing!" she said way too quickly.
"Lydia... you can tell me. Did you... did you change your mind?" he asked quietly and vulnerably.
At that, Lydia turned around to face him immediately and took his face in her hands and looking intently into his eyes.
"No! Stiles, I love you! I can't just change my mind about that", she said sincerely. He released the breath he had been holding and surged forward to kiss her. After only a few moments he seemed to remember that he still didn't know what was going on with Lydia and he pulled back.
"First of all, I love you too!" he said with a huge grin on his face. "And now please tell me what's bothering you", he said, compassion and worry showing in his eyes.
"It's just... I can't believe how blind I have been! I mean, you have been there, right in front of me, since like forever, and what did I do? Ignore you! And then, when I stopped ignoring you I was so mean to you. I know now that I did it because I didn't know how to deal with these feelings I had for you, but that's no excuse for how badly I treated you!" she confessed agitatedly. "I don't know how you can still love me...", she added in a whisper, her voice laced with vulnerability.
Stiles was shocked into silence for a few seconds. He hadn't expected any of that and he had never heard so much vulnerability and sadness in Lydia's voice before. He obviously wasn't too happy about those years either, when she hadn't noticed him or even willingly ignored him. But it's what brought them here and he couldn't think of anything he would want to change about their relationship right now.
Lydia was looking down at her hands that were fidgeting in her lap and Stiles didn't think that he ever seen her fidget before.
"Lydia", he started, trying to get her to look at him but her gaze was fixed onto her hands.
Stiles took her fidgeting hands in his to stop the movements and Lydia finally looked up at him, her eyes wide with regret.
"Yes, you are right, those years haven't been the easiest or happiest years for me but I'm glad that it happened that way. And you know why?", he asked gently and Lydia shook her head. "Because it led us here, to this moment, and I wouldn't want to change that for the world!" he said sincerely.
"You always know exactly the right thing to say to me", she said in awe.
"That's because I know you", he smiled and placed a soft kiss on her lips.
"You really do", Lydia replied with a smile.
There was still some doubt left but she didn't have any more arguments, Stiles had eliminated them all. She was glad that he felt that way about their past and that he wasn't holding anything against her. She didn't know how to express it with words so she leaned forward and hugged him as tightly as she could and he pulled her even closer.
When they pulled apart they both looked out at the ocean again and Lydia could make out the ship on the horizon again. They had seen it quite a few times now, but it was always about the same distance away and there was no way that the people on the ship would notice them.
"If only we knew when the ship would come by the next time", Stiles sighed. "Then we could build something or swim there and wait for it! I'm sure they wouldn't just leave us to die in the water if they saw us!"
"Yes, we could maybe build a raft and take food and water with us", Lydia added.
"But we can't just go all the way there and wait! We have no idea when the next one will come and we can't take our chances!" Stiles said, crushing the hope before it had even really spread.
"Let's just think about it and try to come up with a plan", Lydia suggested, moving closer to Stiles and leaning her head on his shoulder. "There is no rush, we have all the time in the world!" she added, trying to get Stiles' stiff body to relax.
A few more weeks passed and the two of them were happier than ever. Everything in their relationship went perfectly and they continued their daily routines and enjoyed just being together.
But what Stiles didn't know was that Lydia had a plan. Since day one she had marked each day on a huge tree she had found, to keep track of the days. And after she had noticed that the boat came by regularly, she had tried to find a pattern and now she was pretty confident that she had. It had been a little tricky, but she had figured it out in the end! She was Lydia Martin after all.
She had kept it to herself until now because she wanted to be sure. She didn't want to get Stiles' hopes up, only to find that it had been for nothing. But now she was finally ready to tell him.
"Stiles, we need to talk" she told him after breakfast one morning.
"Oh my god! Never in the history of mankind has this sentence started a comfortable and happy conversation!" Stiles said and even though he was obviously joking, Lydia could see that he was a little anxious. No matter how long they were together, Stiles still wasn't entirely convinced that she loved him.
She tried everything that she could think of and told him as often as possible but she could feel his insecurities coming out in situations like these. It saddened her that Stiles didn't seem to think that Lydia could love him and she blamed herself for that. Even though he had assured her that he didn't hold the earlier high school years against her, she knew that they were the cause of these insecurities.
"Then I guess we're making history today!" she joked back and Stiles lips turned into a huge grin.
"Well in that case, of course we can talk", he replied happily, taking her hand and walking over to sit on the beach with her.
"Okay, please don't be mad...", Lydia started but Stiles interrupted her.
"I knew it was something bad..." Stiles said.
"If you would just let me finish, you would know that it really isn't!" Lydia insisted and when Stiles opened his mouth to protest, she silenced him with a look and Stiles motioned for her to continue.
"So, second try. Please don't be mad, but I might have kept something from you...", Lydia started and tried to gauge Stiles' reaction. Much to her surprise he kept his mouth shut and she continued.
"I have been trying to figure out how we can get back home and I think I have found a way!" she said, excitement taking over her voice. "I have been keeping track of the days and when I noticed that the ship came regularly, I started writing down the days. And I have finally figured out the pattern. It was a little tricky, but when I finally figured out that they were actually two different ships, it was pretty easy!"
Stiles gaped at her before he burst out laughing.
"What is it? This isn't funny Stiles! We might be able to get home! I'm serious! Stop laughing! Stiles!" Lydia said, growing more and more frustrated. Was he making fun of her? She had thought that he would be happy and proud of her for figuring this out and maybe a little mad that she hadn't told him earlier. But this? She crossed her arms before her and glared angrily at him.
"I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you, I promise!" he said, cracking up again and Lydia rolled her eyes impatiently. "It's just that I have done the exact same thing and I was just going to wait for the next ship to really, solidly confirm my theory before I was going to tell you." he admitted with a lopsided grin.
Lydia had already wondered why he hadn't mentioned the ship and their escape at all since they had last talked about it but she had figured that he just wanted to avoid the topic because it was making him sad or homesick or frustrated. But never in a million years had she thought that he was on the same track as her.
"Seriously?" she asked, her angry frown turning into a grin.
"What can I say, great minds think alike!" Stiles answered. "I wanted to be sure before I told you so I wouldn't get your hopes up for nothing", he added and Lydia looked at him in awe for a few seconds before kissing him passionately. He immediately reciprocated and wrapped his arms around her. When she pulled back, she grinned at Stiles and he grinned right back.
"Wow, what was that for?" he asked, still holding her close.
"For being the best, most caring boyfriend ever!" she answered and was once again in awe about how much she had changed in the few months they had been on the island. Pre-island how she liked to call it, she would have never been able to say something so cheesy and mean it with all her heart. But Stiles had slowly and quietly brought her to open up and be more honest about her feelings and she was really grateful for it.
She had hidden her feelings for as long as she could remember and even though she had always wanted to be able to show them more, she had not succeeded to do it on her own. But Stiles' way of carrying his feelings on his sleeves seemed to have rubbed off on her and she was glad that she could express her feelings now and didn't feel the need to cover them up anymore.
"I love the sound of that", Stiles replied with a huge grin on his face, pecking her on the lips.
"Alright, so we need to plan everything!" Lydia said excitedly and Stiles nodded enthusiastically.
They spent the rest of the day planning, thinking about how they would build a raft and how much food and water they would take and everything else they needed to bring. They agreed that Stiles would build the raft and Lydia would build boxes to bring the food in. They had also compared their schedules of the ships and unsurprisingly they had figured it both out. They had agreed to wait for two more ships to pass while they prepared everything, just to be sure that they hadn't made a mistake in their schedule.
But soon enough, Lydia noticed that something was off. Every time Lydia would talk about how long they could survive with how much water or food, Stiles grew quiet and changed the topic. It was getting more and more obvious and when their planned departure was only two days away, Lydia couldn't take it anymore and just asked.
"What's wrong? Why do you keep changing the topic every time we talk about this?" she asked, the confusing and annoyance clearly showing in her voice.
Stiles sighed before answering. "I guess I have to tell you now anyway... I'm going alone!" he simply said, not meeting her gaze.
"What!?" Lydia said, confusion taking over.
"I will do this alone and if I succeed I will come back with a ship to get you!" he explained and Lydia felt the anger rise inside of her.
"And you just get to decide that for me," she said as calmly as she could, but Stiles wasn't making it easy. He was saying it as if it had already been decided and Lydia wasn't going to get a say in the matter. If he thought she would just accept it, he had thought wrong.
"Lydia, I'm not putting your life in danger! This is dangerous and it's enough if one of us risks their life!" Stiles argued.
"This is not your decision to make, Stiles! It's mine!" Lydia shouted, getting angrier by the second. Who did he think he was? "Do you think that you can just decide for me now because I'm your girlfriend? It's my life and I am the who decides what I do and what I don't!"
"Lydia, this it too dangerous! There are so many things that could go wrong! Why would you risk your life if you could just stay here? It's enough if one of us risks their life, don't you get that?" Stiles explained, his arms flailing as he tried to get his arguments across.
"What part of you don't get to decide for me did you not understand, Stiles?" she shouted back.
"What part of I'm not putting life in danger did you not understand?" he shot back.
They stood opposite each other, glaring into each other's eyes until Lydia let out a frustrated growl and walked into the woods, leaving Stiles behind. He looked after her, thinking about following her but decided against it. They both needed to calm down before they could talk about the situation properly.
