Summary: S2AU. After arriving in Sunnydale to find Angel with a soul and dating the slayer, Druscilla gets the idea that she can make her 'daddy' care for her again by being like them... Insanity follows.

Author's Note: I had originally intended this to be a full-sized story, but never could get it fleshed out properly. I found it while reviewing my 'put aside for later' folder and ended up deciding to simply post it as a series of scenes from an alternate universe. My apologies to anyone who is bothered by the disjointed nature of it all...

Disclaimer: Joss Whedon owns Buffy and all associated characters and situations, I'm merely using them for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

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"The Wanna-Be Slayer"
By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

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Spike chuckled, "I should hate you for this, really should, maybe even eat you for it... but right now I'm just finding it all too bloody funny."

"Die laughing," Xander muttered harshly.

"Already dead, mate, part an' parcel of being a vampire," the Bloody Awful Poet retorted with amusement evident in his voice.

"You're only... no, you're not worth a 'Princess Bride' joke," Xander shook his head. "We'll go with 'obviously you're not dead enough' instead."