A/N: *pushes glasses higher up face.* Please don't hate me after this chapter. Actually, feel free to love me. Leave a review no matter how you feel because I still want to hear from you.

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Derek drove the long way home. Or back to his house, because only one place was home, and he could never replace it. Home was back in Chicago, where his dad was watching the game and his mother was cooking dinner. Home was where she'd tell him to change out of his dirty clothes and tell his sister to wash up. Home was where his dad would say 'I love you, son.' and kiss his forehead. Since that would never exist again, nothing would ever truly be his home.

Derek coughed to get rid of the lump in his throat, blinking to push back the damn tears that blurred his vision. He hated that he that couldn't think of them without getting like this, it had been nearly seven years since both his parents had died. Still, the familiar pain started in his chest, slowly spreading all over his body and filling him with grief.

It was only that moment that he missed the emptiness, for anything was better than this overpowering dread. Arielle had been there when his parents had passed, she'd been the only person there to get him out of bed in the morning. She'd handled his inheritance and the insurance money, when he was still so out of it. She had really been the only one still in his life, considering his sister had just gotten married and only called every few months. Arielle had replaced the pain with a numbing emptiness that he was grateful for. And the night he'd asked her to marry him he'd been drinking to trying and rid the emptiness because for once, he want to be happy. But nothing had changed, and he figured he was just to broken to be fixed.

Everything started looking up when he joined the BAU, he found a different kind of family. They didn't numb anything but had actually healed parts of him and put him back together in many ways. Some parts, though, were still vary much broken.

Derek could still taste Penelope in his mouth, smell her on his clothes, feel her warm presence. He was tempted to go back, take her in his arms and be without the emptiness for a little while longer.

But he couldn't do that.

What he felt for Penelope frightened him. She brought something out in him that he hadn't seen in himself for a long time, and she was slowly prying her way into his heart. His pants too, but that was far more welcomed. She was someone that surprised him, had him on his toes and constantly thinking. Along with that she was unpredictable and hard to read, which was what scared him shitless.

He thought back to how he'd left so quickly, wondering briefly if she was mad. Then he forced himself to realize it didn't matter, because she wasn't his to think about. Arielle was his. Arielle, the 32 year old dead weight that he was carrying around on his shoulders. But nonetheless, he had realized why she had been in such a horrible mood this morning, and he felt guilty for leaving her by herself.

The groceries shifted around in the trunk as he drove into the long driveway, looking up at the house through the windshield. It was far bigger than they needed, considering it was only the two of them. Arielle had brought home this dog nearly a month ago. The poor thing was disease ridden and vary obviously in bad shape, but she named it max and let it sleep in bed with them. She had taken it to the vet for the fifth time, before he'd left on monday, when it started taking shits everywhere.

Considering the fact that it wasn't around, and peter wasn't feeding it this morning, max probably kicked the dirt.

Finally.

He opened the front door and glanced around, noticing the lights were all turned on. A wine glass and a bottle of his special beer, that he didn't even give to his friends when they came by, sat empty on the coffee table. Derek's eyes narrowed as walked around, the sound of his boots clanking as he checked every room downstairs. The sound of talking and heavy breathing drifted down the stairs, and he guessed the Tv was on.

"Arielle? Arielle can you hear me?" Derek called up the stairs, following the sound of rustling and hushed voices down the hall to his bedroom. He hesitated for a minute before he pulled the door open, and knocked his wife in the face.

"Fuck, derek, what the hell?" She grunted, rubbing her forehead and pulled the door half closed. She glanced to her right and half panicked when she noticed the pizza boy's boxers were draped on top of the dresser. If Derek wasn't distracted by the fact that his wife was completely naked and panting, he would've noticed too. But his observatory nature was out the window in that moment. In fact, his eyes were so drawn to her bare breasts that he didn't see the pale hand peek out from under the bed and grab a white shirt. Arielle was undeniably grateful as she pushed him back into the hallway and shut the door quickly.

"Where have you been?" She inquired in a almost demanding tone, and derek's pulsed quickened as he raised his gaze to hers.

"Shopping." He answered quickly, too quickly. She would've pushed on that if she wasn't eager to get him to the laundry room so the pizza boy she'd been fucking could make a hasty departure. "We need to talk, Arielle, I realize what's been going on with you. I talked to peter this morning and I didn't-"

"You what? Why are you always bothering him, derek? You know he doesn't like you, leave him alone!" She yelled suddenly, getting down the stairs and walking quickly toward the laundry room. Peter was guts-spiller and she knew one look from derek and the boy would sing like a freaking bird. She needed derek as far from him as possible.

Her husband followed her just as she predicted he would, but much to her dislike, stopped her in front of the door. His eyes were hard, and his jaw was set, anger and hurt written on his features. It made her wonder if he knew the truth.

"Well he didn't seem that upset about it. Talking to me isn't the worst thing, you know. I don't know why you always refuse to."

Arielle rolled her emerald eyes in complete and utter annoyance. The man loved to talk about his feelings, jesus, if she hadn't seen his, rather large, cock before she would've guessed he had a freaking pussy. But she knew the more years she was married to him, the more of his inheritance she was allotted.

Arielle planned to stick around for a while longer, so she had to get him away from the door.

"Okay, let's talk. First I need my clothes though, It's cold." She took hold of his wrist, dragging her with him to the laundry room where she pulled a green sweater over her head and dawned a pair of yoga pants. Derek turned his head, allowing her some form of privacy as he leaned against the doorway. After a few minutes he heard the familiar sound of the door close.

"What was that?" He asked immediately, already starting to walk back when arielle launched herself on him. She needed to give the pizza boy enough time to get back to his car, so she covered her mouth with his.

Arielle was a horrible kisser. It was either that, or penelope was so good, that she'd ruined him for anyone else. She licked his lips wetly, the moisture dripping down to his chin. He kept the kiss chaste, but she was trying very hard to push her tongue between his pursed lips. After a few seconds of this, he couldn't take it anymore.

Derke set his hands on her shoulders and had to physically shove the woman away from him. She recovered quickly, smiling at him as thought he'd just received the greatest gift ever.

"I know what's going on, Arielle. I'm not stupid."

Her eyes widened at his declaration, and her mouth opened slightly but she did not speak. She figured he definitely knew.

"Derek please-" She started, her voice shaking with the tears she so expertly showed off. His eyes softened slightly as he interrupted her.

"No, arielle. Things need to change-" He said, and she nearly choked on her spit. The year new year was only two months away, and she was going to get 50,000. She couldn't let it go to waste now. Arielle decided to break out something she knew would change his mind.

"Derek listen to me! Please, baby, I love you. And I've been thinking all day, and I realize, I want to have a baby."

"What?" He cleared his throat, but it sounded a lot like a growl.

"I want us to start a family." She cooed, taking his hand gently. It surprised her when he withdrew his hand like he'd been burned, and he looked at her with shock and distrust. A floral and clean scent wafted her way, vary woman-like. She glared at him tauntingly.

"And where the hell have you been all day? I've been here, thinking about our future and here you come home, smelling like some fucking hooker! Where you at a strip club? huh?" She indicted loudly, and his heart sped quickly. Guilt began to eat away at him in the worst way, and he turned to her slowly.

"Do you really want us to have a family?" He asked in a small, vulnerable voice. Arielle was laughing victoriously on the inside. She had no intention to go off birth control.

"Yes, baby, I really do." His wife said, regarding him to large, innocent eyes.

That's when Derek realized he could never see Penelope Garcia again.