A/N: REALLY, REALLY free right now, so here's another chapter. =D Leave me a review! =P
Witch's Weekly's
1999 Five Most Eligible Bachelors
By Lavender Brown
In conjunction with the new year, Witch's Weekly presents to you our new batch of Five Most Eligible Bachelors! This year, brace yourselves for the singledom of one great wizard which all of us secretly want on this chart!
5. Blaise Zabini
Tall, dark and handsome is the definition of every girl's dream guy and Zabini happens to define tall, dark and handsome.
Dark and brooding, this wizard is not only scoring an 'O' grade on looks but also in the achievements department as well.
Using funds given to him by his wealthy mother, Zabini had set up a wizardwear line, Raging Robes, in Diagon Alley and is now plotting to have another store opened in Hogsmeade. His future plans include the expansion of his wizardwear line to the States and within Europe.
Bank on him receiving bags of galleons soon, witches. This playboy of a bachelor (he has rumoured to be breaking the hearts of top model Darlene Wilkins and lead singer of Inferi Invasion, Priscilla Becker, among others) may just be splurging on you next.
4. George Weasley
Known to be Hogwarts' most notorious trouble-maker alongside his late brother, Fred Weasley, after the time of James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew, it was only natural that he and his twin will be conducting a business that assisted all young wizards and witches in acting out mischief while attending school.
After the passing of Fred Weasley during the Battle of Hogwarts, George Weasley had not shown any hesitance in his pace in expanding the Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes franchise. The recent launching of the store in Hogsmeade have went extremely well, receiving floods of customers since - Zonko was not pleased; still isn't, actually.
In the following week, Weasley will be launching his next big-earner in the wizarding village of Workaka, located not far off Drumstrang. A recent survey amongst the students attending Drumstrang shows high anticipation awaiting Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes.
Looks like this jokester is on his way to some serious money!
3. Percy Weasley
Aspiring to be the next Minister for Magic, this Weasley is, without a doubt, the most ambitious of all the red-heads.
His rise through the ranks has been fast-paced. It took only four years in the Ministry to get him to where he is today – Senior Undersecretary to the Minister. Clearly, Weasley is one to easily gain respect from others.
The only clue suggesting Weasley is Gryffindor is the fire burning in his eyes, mirroring his amibition. Most would beg to differ, saying ambition is the trait of a Slytherin. However, Weasley's ambition is certainly not of the cold and calculating sort his usually expressionless yet intriguingly searching face portrays. His ambition is one of smouldering heat – not unlike that of a lion's silent growl.
Throughout the four years, this Gryffindor has learnt a few tricks in the Ministry, instilling in him a suitable amount of Slytherin to make him political; yet in him lays a Gryffindor, giving him a heart. This combination effectively gives him an edge – to know how to survive in the field and to gain popularity from our community.
Give or take a few years time, Weasley may just be appearing on the front page of the Daily Prophet, gazing at you with his intense and piercing eyes that some might even find sexy, as our Minister for Magic.
2. Draco Malfoy
A Death Eater no more, Malfoy is now a redeemed man. Finally, the sneering boy from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has grown up to be a man who is no longer bound to the belief that muggle-borns are scums.
Malfoy, after being cleared of all charges in a hearing six months ago, has been making amends for his past mistakes by contributing to the restoration of Hogwarts. Just last week, he was promoted to be the team leader by the Minister for Magic, Kingsley Shacklebolt, due to his tireless efforts in his work. The restoration project will be ending this March and Malfoy's plans after this project includes an assignment from Professor McGonagall to update Hogwarts: A History with help from the portraits of the late Albus Dumbledore and Severus Snape. He would also be interviewing Harry Potter, Ronald Weasley, Hermione Granger and several other parties involved in the recent events that occurred in Hogwarts.
Actually, sod the redeemed stuff and all that, with his seductive cerulean grey eyes, incredibly striking features and gorgeous Quidditch player- bod, Malfoy could have snagged the top spot of this chrt if it was not because of the Boy Who Lived…
Harry Potter
Yes, ladies, Harry Potter is currently unattached! He has recently broken up with Ginny Weasley, the fiery only daughter of the Weasley clan.
How was Malfoy going to beat this even with his clear superiority in the looks department?
Honestly, need I say more?
Devour him already!
Happy New Year, Malfoy. I didn't know you received this assignment of updating Hogwarts: A History.
O
Happy New Year, Hermione. So, you've read the article in Witch's Weekly? Funny, I didn't think you were the type to read girly magazines like that. Number two, not bad, eh? I'm practically number one, considering Potter's sexuality.
O
Even with his sexuality revealed, Harry would still have been more desirable than you are.
O
Hark, says the girl who's currently dating me.
O
Not exclusively.
O
But you're definitely not dating Potter now. Or anyone else, for that matter – nor am I. So, that technically means we are dating exclusively.
O
Unofficially. Anyway, you didn't tell me you got to update Hogwarts: A History.
O
I actually asked McGonagall to give you the gig but she wouldn't because you're doing NEWTs.
O
But I'm more than capable.
O
I'm sure of that but she said no. So, I took it up because if I didn't, she would have to pass it on to someone else. And I was sure you would prefer me doing it.
O
I would have loved doing it myself – it would be a dream come true. But why did you take it up, anyway? Don't you have any other plans?
O
I'm torn between becoming an Auror, serving as a teacher here, starting my own business and working in the Department of International Magical Co-operation.
O
Well, aren't you decisive, Malfoy.
O
Hermione, why are you still calling me Malfoy? We're dating now.
O
You're still entitled to that special privilege I gave you months ago.
O
No, honestly, Hermione, why?
You could just write it. I could live you not saying in, for now.
O
It.
O
What?
O
You said write it.
O
Oh, haha, Hermione. Very intelligent of you.
Come now, just write my given name.
O
My given name.
O
Hermione, stop before my stomach ache from laughing in excess.
O
Look who's sarcastic now.
O
Let's not stray off topic. Write Draco.
O
Hermione Jean Malfoy.
O
Merlin's beard, Hermione. Aren't you terrific at distractions.
Top spot, huh, Harry?
O
Talking to us now, aren't you?
O
Hi, Ron. How are you taking the whole Harry Potter's-the-most-desirable-guy-in-the-wizarding-world thing?
O
I know he loves me and he will definitely not leave me for a girl. Why do you care?
O
Because I'm your best friend, silly.
O
You picked Malfoy.
O
I can have both sides if you and Harry weren't so bloody narrow-minded. I figure if you can't accept it – fine. I just won't ever talk about him to you guys and you'll just have to pretend I'm not friends with him.
O
Well, I'm saying you can't have both sides.
O
Well, I don't bloody care, Ron. I can have everything and anything at all that I want.
O
Everything and anything at all that you want? Do you realize how much you sound like Malfoy?
O
So what, Ron? So what if I've picked up a little bit of self-centred quality from Malfoy? You've said it yourself, we've been best friends since we're kids. Why are you throwing it away because of Malfoy?
O
You are the one throwing it away – not us.
O
Ron, you've accepted me when I was eleven. I still am the same girl – bushy-haired, know-it-all Hermione. Just because I now have a new friend that you don't like doesn't mean you could just exile me. I'm not asking you to hang out with him, anyway. All I'm asking is that you see past the fact that I'm friends with him because I'm still the same person. Malfoy doesn't affect anything.
O
But you sounded exactly like Malfoy a few letters ago. Obviously befriending him affects something.
O
That one tiny thing is going to stop you from recognizing me as who I was and still am?
O
Alright, fine. We're sorry. How are you?
O
Great! Was that Harry or Ron? That sounded more like Harry but it was Ron's penmanship, whoever you are.
O
It's Ron, Hermione.
O
Oh, good. Harry's rubbing off on you, then. I support you guys.
O
Thank you, Hermione. I'm sorry you had to find out the way you did, by the way. We wanted to tell you in person but you weren't talking to us. Now, we have to figure out how to tell Ginny.
By the way, were you going out with Malfoy that night? I thought I saw him behind you.
O
Em… yes, I was. Where's Harry, anyway?
O
Harry's asleep so I took his letter for him.
Are you and Malfoy dating now?
O
Only occasionally. They're just friendly dates.
It's rude to read mail meant for others.
O
Hermione, stop changing the subject. Are you dating Malfoy or not? There isn't such things as friendly dates.
O
Not exclusively.
O
Who else are you dating then?
O
No one.
O
Is he dating someone else?
O
Em… not that I know of.
O
So, you're dating him exclusively unofficially?
O
No, we're not. We agreed we would be dating casually. Why are you not mad anyway? About me and him dating, I mean.
O
Because I've known it for sometime now.
O
What?
O
I can't look at him and you sitting together and not see that you two are in love – like Harry and I.
O
And you're not mad?
O
If there was a reason to be mad, it's only because you're not telling me the truth.
But I get it, actually, your situation with Malfoy is like being gay.
O
I'm sorry, but what?
O
You're Gryffindor, he's Slytherin; it's a forbidden thing – like being gay in the wizarding world. Harry says the Muggle community are more accepting towards gays but I can't imagine giving up magic. Harry and I want to be married sometime in the future, too. So, we're trying to figure things out.
O
You could get married in the States, I think. I'll check it up for you.
O
Thanks, Hermione. Ooh! We can have a double wedding! Harry and I, you and Malfoy! What do you think?
O
Ron, I'm currently casually dating Draco. We're probably never getting married, let alone anytime soon.
O
Maybe not soon, but, married – definitely.
O
You were just against me befriending him some letters ago, Ron. Are you insane? Oh wait, you can't possibly be Ron. Who are you and what have you done to my best friend?
O
Don't be hysterical, Hermione. I'm deciding to support you.
Won't you rather have my support than my discouragement?
O
Yes, but something's not right here.
O
Hermione, I'm gay and you're in love with a Slytherin – nothing is right here.
