A/N: Borrowed
L is for Love
"I don't think I've ever been this scared, Maxie," Alec admitted one night. He ran one big hand through his hair. "It's disconcerting."
Max exhaled deeply. About time. Though neither of them was big on emotions, was glad that he was finally speaking up. Something had been on his mind all week.
In the years she'd known him, Max had gotten used to letting Alec come to her. She wouldn't have guessed it when they first met, but her mate almost always had some small nagging worry in the back of his mind. Sometimes he wanted to talk it out with her, but he generally preferred to keep them to himself.
The past week had been different though; he had been avoiding her. Around TC he kept busy with different projects that kept him out and about during his shifts. At night, he was just a little off. Even when they mated, he was distant. Though she knew better, her imagination had drifted as far as imagining he was having an affair; she had scolded herself at the idea, but grown more concerned all the same.
"Why are you scared?" She asked quietly, settling down next to him on the couch.
He glanced over at her, eyes tired.
"I'm terrified that I don't... have enough love... and it's killing me."
Max furrowed her brow.
"Is this because of the new baby?"
He looked away.
"Yes," he muttered, burying his face in his hands. "What if I don't have enough? I know it sounds stupid, but what if I can't love this new baby as much as I love Gracie? You're not supposed to love one of your kids more than the other one, but I don't know if I have enough in me to love this new baby as much as I love our daughter. Before she was born, I didn't even know it was possible to feel so much and now it's supposed to be double... but I can't love her less to love the new baby more..."
Max wanted to cry and smile at the same time. Stupid hormones. She took his hands and looked into his tired green eyes.
"I've never met anyone who has more capacity to love than you do, Alec. It comes naturally to you. In five months when you meet this baby it'll just come to you. You won't be taking any love away from Gracie; it'll just double like magic. Your capacity to love is what I love and respect most about you."
He leaned over and kissed her, letting his lips linger over her. Then he stood, pulling her up with him and they walked, hand in hand, to the doorway of their daughter's bedroom.
Leaving the lights off, they stood together watching Gracie sleep and listening to the toddler's gentle breathing.
"We've done well so far," Max whispered.
"Pregnancy makes you sweeter," Alec teased, lifting her hand to his lips. Then more seriously, "I think I can rustle up enough for both my girls and whatever we have coming."
Max smiled at her mate.
"X5-494, you were built to be a soldier and look at you now..."
