I Forget (Where We Were) / Part III

Christmas morning is anew. Snow was packed tight against windows. The sun shinning with the threat of melting it all away. Everyone was gathered around the tree that was somehow decorated with an a abundance of presents, more than enough for Clarke counted the way past the number of people among them.

But never the less, in their warm pajamas, and sleepy eyes, they began.

Raven started, opening a box with that brilliant grin of hers. But the expression on her face is priceless when she pulled out a bobble-head figurine with a striking resemblance to her. The confusion however, wore off in a matter of seconds for she realized that was indeed its purpose. It was a bobble-head figurine of her in her fireman outfit.

The Latina looked up in complete shock as Monty spoke. "It's for the rig, the dashboard looked a little lonely last time I was there." He shrugged with a pleased smile. "There's more, though."

Even more confused, Raven digs around the remainder of the box and pulls out an envelope. Reading the contents over her smile fades as she locks eyes with Monty—her secret santa.

"No…" She mumbled in disbelief reading it over.

I know how hard you've been working for those classes. Next three are on me.

"Monty I can't."

"You can and you will." His smile grew as he went to hug her.

"This is literally perfect, you have no idea." She beamed.

And the cycle went on. From Raven to Jasper, and Jasper to Octavia, with a punny poster and a clever gifting here, everyone remained in good spirits, the feeling of Christmas finally upon them.

"Lincoln is my secret santa this year, actually." Octavia announced, radiating grin and all.

"What a surprise." Jasper mumbled in joke before Maya threw him a short glare, shutting him up.

"Anyway, he actually already received my gift!" She went on to explain as confusion rose through the small crowd before her. "Is there a sexual reference in that phrase we're supposed to be getting?" Jasper questioned making most of them snicker expect for Bellamy who's expression dropped suddenly.

"I need a coffee. It's too early for this…" Bellamy groaned in Clarke's ear, erupting giggles within her.

"Wait, isn't that breaking the rules?" Wick questioned. "I mean, in order for you to have given him this present already he'd had to have known before this morning, right?"

"Uh, yeah. Okay so we bent the rules a little—"

"Im sure there was a lot of be—"

"Jasper I swear to god if the next word coming out of your mouth is "bending", I'm gonna literally going to kick your white-ass in the cold!" The Blake sister scolded not wanting to hear anymore remarks and just finish her train of thought.

"And I'm done here." Bellamy stated grimly, trying to burn the image of his little sister and her fiancé out of his head as he rose to his feet.

"Hold on, Bell. You're gonna want to hear this." Octavia cleared her throat trying to win back her audience. "Alright, in spite of breaking the so-called "rules of the game", this next news will definitely make up for it."

Lincoln stood grinning, joining her. "We decided, why wait?"

"We're pushing up the wedding!"

The gang gaped at the two before them not really knowing how to react.

"P-Pushing up the wedding?" Bellamy clarified suddenly thinking he needed something stronger than coffee at the moment.

"Oh my god. You're pregnant!" Raven quickly jumped on board, heavy with the accusation. Octavia's heart raced at the allegation but it was something that quickly turned into defense. Bellamy's eyes widen in horror. His stomach turn. He suddenly felt very light-headed.

"N-No, I am not pregnant!" She defended rather loudly sharing a quick and nervous glance between Lincoln, trying hard to keep her cool.

"Wedding planning just… it-it sucks! A-And we just want it to get it over with!" Octavia beamed gracefully.

Bellamy gripped the side of the couch with one hand, and Clarke's the other, coming back to reality.

"Well, that's great, guys!" Maya cheered encouragingly.

"Thank you, Maya!" Octavia emphasized her name in hopes everyone would join in suit. "Y-Yeah! Congrats guys!" Clarke followed completely baffled by the news, although it did make sense because she knew the Blake sibling had been struggling in the wedding department for a while.

"Yeah, what uh, what date were you to thinking of?"

"14th of February." Octavia stated proudly. "Valentines Day!"

"Valentine's day?" Bellamy questioned in alarm. He could actually feel his blood pressure rising. It was way to soon for him. He took back his seat next to Clarke who rubbed circles in his back as he tried to process the information that his little sister—the little sister he had to basically raise, was going to be someone's wife in less than two months and he had no say in that.

Clarke saw the struggle in his demeanor and chuckled at it. Bellamy always had a hard time letting go.

"And speaking of Valentines day and all things wedding related!" Octavia trailed off collecting a few presents from under the tree. They were all the same in size and the gang eyed her suspiciously as she and Lincoln passed them out.

"Since most of you—sorry Wick, are in the wedding party. These," She exhales sharply watching everyone observe the small red boxes in their hands. "are a little gift from Lincoln and I."

"Gift certificates to Cupid's Conga?" Jasper questioned in horror already knowing what that meant.

"For the wedding, of course. You all need to learn how to dance," Octavia announced nearly catching another one of Jaspers harmless comments before it even came out. "and before you ask; yes, it's mandatory. Now, these will cover three dance lessons between you and your partner! Please, please attend them." She urged.

"You know, for a couple who "just want to get it over with" you're really anal about all this…"

"You've got to stop with the sexual references Jasper!" Bellamy groaned, he was just barely hanging on.

"Alright. Alright." The Jordan boy quickly surrendered making the rest snicker.

"Anyway, thats all!" Octavia announced.

"Okay... so who's next?" Monty called out wanting to move the conversation along before it escalated any further. "Next?" Clarke questioned.

"Secret Santa—"

"Right! Okay, uh… well it was Lincoln… so Lincoln, who was your pick?"

"Actually, you." He smiled throwing Clarke a gold wrapped large box.

"Merry Christmas, Clarke."

A tin of Derwent charcoal pencils met her view and she smiled at the gesture of it. "Octavia and Bellamy helped me pick it out." He shrugged. "I have absolutely no idea what company you like to draw with o-or any of that stuff, but yeah."

"No, no these are awesome. I love them Lincoln." She smiled meeting his gaze before engulfing him in a hug.

"Good."

"God, I can't wait to use these." Clarke added cheekily pressing the tin and paper to her chest before putting them carefully back into the box.

"Alright, my turn. I had…" Her eyes scanned around the room playfully before landing on Bellamy himself.

"Bellamy!"

"I knew it." The Blake brother chuckled making the blond peer at him but fish out the box for him underneath the tree and hand it to him. "You're gonna love this."

"Oh really?" One of his eyebrows shot up amusement.

"Just open it, Bell."

And that he did. From the green wrapped box he pulled out a grey t-shirt, the words "History Buff" labeled under a picture of Abraham Lincoln's face on a muscular body making him actually laugh out loud.

"This is literally perfect." He exclaimed holding out for everyone to see.

"Told ya!" The blond beamed as he folded the shirt and threw it over his shoulder, turning back to his present pulling out a book. "Octavia said you lost yours." Clarke began as his fingers traced the bindings of the old almost ruined book. "this was my dads copy." She stated with a small smile. "I figured you couldn't have a copy of the Ilia laying around, without the Odyssey."

"Clarke, you didn't have to." He mumbled feeling a little guilty for it having been her fathers personal copy. Apparently girls had a thing for gifting him his favorite childhood books. First Gina with the Iliad, now Clarke with the Odyssey. And Bellamy had no filter when it came to telling her that. "Man you girls like gifting me books." He spoke playing with a grin on his face.

Clarke peered at him playfully. "I'm just glad there isn't a sequel to the Odyssey." Bellamy chuckled catching himself as the rest of the gang stopped in confusion.

"That makes no sense." Octavia bluntly added.

It does to us. Clarke thought, Bellamy reading her mind.

But the blond shrugged quickly moving on. "Poor thing needed some love—it was catching dust and begging to be read on that shelf anyway."

"This is perfect, two nerds coming together…" Octavia commented sweetly making both of them roll their eyes in amusement.

They're making breakfast when Clarke whispers "look inside the cover" to his ear, referring to the book she gave him. Which he does, finding a small slip of paper written in her ungodly handwriting.

There's still one more present, XO.

His eyebrows lit up in surprise and she winks his way before going to help Octavia on the other side of the counter.

They spend the day around the cabin, hanging out with gang, playing like little children in the windy snow. At one point Clarke's face was shoved in the snowman's after being tricked by Bellamy which brought on a full packed war between the two as everyone else joined.

It felt good to laugh, and relax and just feel at peace for a moment and she found herself wanting it to last forever.

Bellamy was in the same boat as her, forgetting all the bad of the past and focusing on the good in the now. He paced around the cabin in search of blond among the white around them. He heard tracks of a few footsteps behind him. "They're hiding behind the shed under the patio." Lincoln mumbled with a sly smug to his face.

"Noted. I say its a simply surround and conquer strategy would suffice." Bellamy stated gathering together as many snowballs as he could. "Find Jasper and Monty. I'll tell Wick, then we go."

"Sounds like a plan."

And from there they parted. As he moved around the perimeter of the cabin. He could tell Lincoln was right, considering most the snowball that were being thrown their way were coming from hand behind the the, where he had said they were.

"Wick!" Bellamy shouted in a small whisper grabbing his attention.

"Girls are behind the shed, surround and conquer, alright?"

"Okay." Kyle nodded, motioning to Lincoln and the rest of the boys behind them. They began counting down silently. And on three they ran forward surrounding the girls and pelting them with snowballs. In the end the girls defense was weak and when the boys ran out of snow they quickly grabbed them forcing them to surrender.

Bellamy caught hold of Clarke from behind and picked her up, spinning her as her giggles filled the cold air around them. Lincoln made a grab for Raven who was closest to him as Jasper cornered Octavia, and Monty nearly tackling Maya in the snow, leaving Wick to stare and laugh at his surroundings before him.

They run out of food fairly quickly, and although Octavia managed to rack out a list of things they needed to buy, she didn't feel like executing the trip there and back. That's where, Clarke and Bellamy step up and volunteer. Alone.

No one says anything with the exception of the face Raven throws Clarke's way as they exit out the front door in a rush.

The drive to town is a solid twenty minutes of pine tree's and toppled with fresh snow and for a moment Bellamy remembers it's christmas. "What's open today?"

"I'm sure there's something." The blond shrugs.

"Yeah you're right."

The rest of the trip is surrounded in an aroma of comfortable silence alongside the rumbling engine, with simple smiles. Clarke rolls down her window at a point and lets her arm hang out in the heavy wind. Bellamy glances her way, catching her in a moment where he hair danced effortlessly through the wind and he thinks to himself that he could get used to this.

Grinning, he turns back to the road, breathing in the fresh air.

Ten minutes later Clarke notices they're not going the right way and makes a point to tell Bellamy.

"Oh, I know." He mumbles through a grin turning the amused expression on the blonds face sour. "Bellamy Blake, what are you up to?" She questions sitting up straighter. "I think you're forgetting we have a herd of hungry hippos back there."

"They can wait."

"Uhm…"

"I'm feeling a little adventurous," He cocks his eyebrow her direction. "you?"

He turns the car right, unto a private road and accelerates up. Clarke hangs on to the bar as the SUV rocks against the beaten path but stays quiet. She tries to come up with a few reasons to why their little detour was a bad idea, but one glance at that content expression on Bellamy's face and she couldn't voice them.

So she lets her body relax against the cushion of the chair and keeps to herself.

Clarke can barely remember the car stopping because the moment she lays her eyes on the scene before her, everything stops. It takes a moment for her eyes to absorb the brilliance that surrounds her and her hand itches for the handle of the door, wanting nothing but to step outside and get lost in the present.

And she does, climbing out of the car, nearly stumbling over her own feet by not paying attention.

The car was parked on a ridge that over looked a wondrous scene. Below them two cascading mountain slops, a large canal river directing its force in-between them. A myriad of brilliant colors danced around as Bellamy joined her; white mountains, green pine, blue water, crip air, and clear sky.

Bellamy stands beside her, pleased smile present on his face as he watches her take the beautiful scenery in.

"It's something…"

"It's beautiful." Clarke mumbles not turning away from it all.

And Bellamy has to agree although he doesn't voice his opinion. He doesn't need to, she knows that. And somehow his smile grows as he drops his arms to his side, his hand craving the feel of hers around his.

"How'd you know about this?"

"We drove past it a few days ago when we took a wrong turn back to town."

"I can't look away." Clarke mumbles, their cold air was brushing it's way through the bristle on her skin, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. But she didn't mind the sensation, in fact she welcomed it for it made her feel alive.

"Me either." Bellamy mumbles, his gaze set on her. But she doesn't notice.

They stand there for a while simply taking it all in.

There's a solid moment of silence as they take in their surroundings before they retreat to the car hand in hand.

Both quiet, merely their actions driving their desires.

And a solid half hour later they're in a heated match tucked under blankets in the back of the SUV unable to keep their hands off each other when a hard knock on the window interrupts them bringing them to a halt.

"Bellamy?" Clarke questions a little disoriented.

"Shit." He mumbles rolling himself off her and looking up to meet an officer on the exterior of the car.

"I'll take care of this."

He hears Clarke snicker as he throws on his clothes and opens the door. They didn't even heard the car pull up behind them.

"Is there a problem officer?" Bellamy questions. The cop couldn't have been older than twenty-one which only made their situation more awkward. And he took one look at the messy haired man before him and the blond who was covered with a blanket and sighs.

"Is he bothering you miss?" He asks Clarke to which the blond quickly shakes her head in confusion.

"No, sir."

"Alright, now give me one reason I shouldn't arrest you two for public indecency..." He continues cocking his eyebrow.

Bellamy exhales, throwing Clarke a quick smirk before revealing his badge from his pocket and flashing it before the kid.

"Because I'm an officer of the law. Detective Blake, Seattle Intelligence unit." He added in a rather snarky manner, making Clarke jab him with her foot.

Be nice. She mouths his way.

The cop takes one look at the badge then slowly backs away, showing his surrender. "Right. O-Of course, sir." He stumbles over his words nervously. "As you were sir..."

Bellamy offers him a curd nod before breaking his hostile attitude and flashing a smile, laughing.

"I'm just messing with you kid." He exhales in amusement. But the cop froze, in confusion not understanding why was going on.

"I'm breaking your balls kid... In fact, you're actually right. Public indecency is in fact a very serious law... It's just, me and my lady here have been having problems with time management." Bellamy trails off. "But I understand rules are rules and uh, policemen like you are here to protect and enforce those rules, so if you feel the need to arrest us, please do."

Clarke jabs him once more, upon hearing him her eyes widen in panic because out of all the things she could be been arrested for in the past this wasn't one of them and she didn't need to change that now.

"T-That won't be necessary, sir. Uh, a-as long as you and your uh... lady stop what you're doing..." He starts off a little shaky but ends off in a rather confident manner.

"Ultimatum. I like it." Bellamy comments. "Gotta say officer," He peers at the kids name tag. "Drew. We need more strong-witted me like you on the force."

"T-Thank you, sir."

"Alright, you have a nice day now."

"You too, sir."

As soon as the door slammed Clarke's voice rang out in a frailty demeanor. "You enjoyed that a little too much."

"Nah, I'm just messing with him... Now, where were we?" He flashed a devious smile before pouncing back on her making her giggles bounce off the SUV's Windows.

"Bellamy!"

...

The drive back is intense. In the duration it took for them to get to the grocery store and drive back a storm was forming. The sun disappeared and the wind picked up throwing snow across the air like bullets.

They barely make it back due to the heavy snow formed on the road and when they do they breathe out in utter relief.

"Took you guys long enough." Raven smirks as the rest help them carry food from outside. "I'm sorry do you not see what's going on outside?" Clarke snaps playfully with a distasteful grunt.

Such convenient weather, guys. Raven wants to state, but keeps to herself noticing the tone in the Blondes voice.

"There's a blizzard forming according to the news," Lincoln announces, looking up from his device. "storm's is gonna hit hard tonight."

"Thank god you guys got back in time." Octavia exhales sharply, helping Maya put all the food away.

"Yeah, it was getting pretty nasty out there. Passed by one accident already. Can't image what it's going to look like after this one blows over." Bellamy mumbles. Outside the wind picks up drumming gusts of snow against the Windows in the living room.

"I say we eat and watch a movie or something." Monty offers.

"I need a nap." Clarke announces. Her day has been filled with numerous extraneous activities one of which involved being cased by a storm. While the others take this into consideration Clarke slips away to her room.

And although the group showed their protests she managed to get away anyhow and escape in the warm comfort of that king bed.

She wakes up when she feels another feels the weight of another body bedside her.

"Bellam—?" She groans too tried to open her eyes in confirmation.

"Shh."

Clarke frowns, peeling open her eyes in confusion. When she sees him burrioted up beside her in the bed.

"What on earth are you doing?"

But before he has the chance to respond their bedroom door swings open. Clarke immediately has that instinct to jump out of bed in panic. But doesn't.

"Is Bellamy in here?" Jaspers voice echoes across the room as Bellamy tries to lay still.

"No." She moaned after gazing at the look on his face from under the blankets. But Jasper peered at her suspiciously and after a moment of her throwing a glare his way he left. The second that door shut, Bellamy revealed himself once more with a husky grin. "We're playing hide and seek."

"I swear, the second I leave that group you all turn into five year olds."

"Ha ha, very funny."

Hearing footsteps out in the hall running around, Bellamy tucks himself under the covers once more. This time Octavia's head pops in the door. "Is Bellamy in here?"

"No!"

"Sorry!" And with that Octavia made her exit.

"We're on teams." Bellamy reveals uncovering his face. "I see that... tell me again, why are you hiding in here?" Clarke questions tentatively. "Oh..." One of Bellamy's eyebrows shoots up in surprise before he smiles, and goes to lean his weight on hers meeting her lips.

"Well, I happen to like it here."

"Oh, really?" Clarke deepens the kiss and escapes from under, climbing on top of him. "Want to tell me what the rest of my present is?" He questions.

"I'm afraid that's gonna have to wait." She mumbles lightly against his skin.

Outside the snow falls fast and heavy, pounding and piling up against the windows.

...

The blizzard takes a toll on the cabin when the power goes out, the heat following suit.

"This is insane. We're going to freeze out here!" Octavia shrieks pacing around the kitchen, phone in hand attempting to reach out to both the landlord and the electrical company.

"I'm sure the power box or a few power lines are frozen out there." Lincoln reasons trying to calm his anxious fiancé. "Yeah, power goes out all the time out here, O. We'll just wait it out and everything will be okay." Bellamy adds swiftly, popping a chip in his mouth. As Octavia attempts to relax in Lincoln's lap, head in hands, footsteps creek along the railing by the upstairs.

"Is there a reason the internet doesn't work?!" Jasper shouts. "Some people have scores they'd like to maintain!" He adds as if that somehow motivates them to fix it faster.

"Powers out!" Clarke shouts from where she was leaning against the long island counter.

"Shit, seriously?" He replies slipping his phone into his pocket. "Did I just hear that the powers out?" Maya calls out following her boyfriend down.

"Yep."

Outside the storm ragged, the wind crashing against the side of the cabin. "We'll we're stuck here for a while, that's for sure." Monty states.

"This is insane." Octavia states once more. "No electricity means no dinner, no heat, no nothing!" She continues somberly.

"We're gonna die out here."

"Okay, that's a pretty dramatic statement." Bellamy exhales with a small chuckle patting his sisters back. "Look, everything's gonna be fine. I have a back-up generator in the SUV. I'll just go get it and turn that bad boy on—problem solved."

Clarke immediately snaps at the mention of him leaving in instant. "Thats the worst idea I've heard all night. No way." She shakes her head.

Another gust of wind exploded against the side of the cabin, snow following behind it.

"I'll be fine the car's right out there. I just need someone to help me carry it back in here." He walks toward the foyer, slipping his jacket on. "Bellamy, I don't think that's a good idea." Octavia voices standing with the blond. Clarke takes a step in front of him just as he goes to reach his keys. "It's not safe." She states once more as if that going to do anything. "She's right, last update states 34mph winds with heavy snow." Monty adds looking up from reading the information off his phone.

"The car is right there, we'll run down, ran the generator and come back up. Who's up for it?"

Jasper shrugs, taking a step toward the Blake brother. "I'll help." He puts his jacket on. The expression on Maya's face is somewhere between worried and annoyed. "I'm not gonna tell you what to do, but this is not your brightest idea." She shakes her head, taking a step his way.

"We'll be fine." He reassures her with that stupid grin. Maya rolls her eyes. "I don't like this..."

And Clarke almost glares Bellamy's way. "I'm sure if we just wait a little longer, the power will come back on."But the boys ignore her warnings and go on. "Guys—"

"We'll be fine, Princess." Bellamy retort is paired with a deeming smirk she rolls her eyes at.

"Ready, Jasper?" He questions turning towards the front door, unlocking it's hinges. "I'm with Clarke on this one. Maybe this isn't such a good idea." Octavia suddenly adds as if that somehow supposed to change their minds.

But Jasper nods. And the door swings open banging against the back wall from the force of the powerful wind.

They struggle to close it afterwards, snow falling violently through.

"They're gonna get themselves killed aren't they?" Octavia mumbles hanging right to Clarke's arm. "Unfortunately." She exhales watching through the side window as the boys struggled to pace down the steps off the patio and down the driveway, limbs hanging on to the railing, coats flying.

"I can't watch." Octavia groans hiding her head in the pit of Clarke's arm. Maya approaches them hanging onto the Blake sister. "Our boys are stupid." Clarke mumbles then quickly realizes what she just said. But with everyone was so focused on the boys outside, no one noticed and so her panic quickly died down.

The boys manage to dig through the snow and pop the back open, from what the girls could see from upstairs.

Clarke watched the Blake brother drag out the big piece of metal, Jasper struggling with the handle. And the next moment happens so quickly she almost thinks she was imagining things. They attempt to pick it up, but Jasper quickly slips on the ice, generator crashing to the ground, one of the lose corners the the thing cutting and slicing through his leg.

The girls wince, the boys behind them not having a clear view of what was happening.

Bellamy lets go of the generator helping Jasper to his feet which proves difficult due to the snow and wind, and once both men were on their feet, they pick the metal up and run back up the stairs to the best of their ability.

"Open the door, open the door!" Octavia shouts on alert. And they do, allowing the two men to shuffle through a large generator in front of them.

"God—I told you guys!" Clarke snaps in a scolding, but concerned manner. Her eyes immediately fixated to the cut on Jasper's leg."Relax Blondie, it's just a scratch." Bellamy attempts to defend. "Just a scratch?" And Clarke drops to Jasper's feet, examining his leg through the cut open jean pant.

"You're bleeding, Jasper." She nearly growls. "Yeah, I know," he grits through his teeth stoically. "But I'm fine." He tries to stand from where he was seated on the bench in the foyer but Maya pushes him back down.

"I'm the doctor here—I'll be the judge of that." Clarke mumbles knowing he was most definitely not fine. She rips the rest of the pant leg open getting a clearer view of his gushing cut.

"Yeah, you definitely need stitches." She announces noticing the severity of the wound. "We gotta get you to a hospital." She continues then groans. "But doesn't look like that's gonna happen."

Eyes wide open, Jasper moans in alarm.

"Uh, I think I saw a med kit in the closet by our room upstairs, can one of you guys check?"

"On it." Monty states, pacing his way up there.

"Okay, we're gonna move you to the living room and elevate that leg." Clarke noted to Jasper who nodded through the pain, agreeing. "Does this mean I can't snowboard tomorrow?" He questions and the look Clarke throws his way almost makes him shut up for the rest of the night—almost.

Bellamy and Lincoln help him to the living room, setting him down on the couch.

Monty runs back handing the med kit to Clarke and immediately she gets to work, first checking for any narcotics. "Uh, Maya get something to wipe his leg clean." Clarke demanded. "Okay," She exhales wrapping his leg with blood-stopper gauze, right after Maya wipes it clean.

"Good they have Acetaminophen—"

"Ace-min-ph-wha?" Jasper moaned from the couch in severe pain.

"Acetaminophen is uh, think of Tylenol; drug that works on the parts of the brain that receive pain messages and control body temperature." The blond goes on the explain, popping one tablet in his hand. "Take it."

"You want me to take Tylenol for that!" Jasper referred to his leg, completely baffled.

"It's the only thing that's in here—"

"Don't you have morphine o-or Vicodin or something! You're a doctor!" He shouts aimlessly. "Jasper just because I'm a doctor doesn't mean I'm a freaking pharmacy—"

"We're gonna try to get the generator working." Raven announces from where she's standing with Wick hoping to avoid the strange debate that was taking place.

"Listen! There is a secure kit in here. I can stitch it up for you, but we have to control the bleeding." Clarke mumbles trying to get over their recent fall out. Jasper's eyes instantly widen. "Y-You want to do—what?" He's basically breathless. "I mean I could leave it alone until we get you to a hospital but that's not gonna be until maybe tomorrow, and if I don't do anything it could get infected... I-I can't leave it like this Jas, honestly." She deliberately decides at the end of that sentence. If that wound somehow got infected by the time they reached a hospital it would be worse than it was now.

"Fine..." He groans as Maya tightens her grip on his hand. She says nothing, just sits there with an unamused scowl on her face for this wasn't the first time he completely ignore her advice and got hurt in the process.

"Is he gonna be okay?" Bellamy asks, butting in. "He's gonna be just fine." Clarke responded coldly. No thanks to you. She wants to add but doesn't. If it weren't for his stupid suggestion this wouldn't be happening.

But he gets the tone in her voice and backs off going to help Raven and Wick with the generator.

"Oh, this is so not how I wanted to spend Christmas." Jasper whines making the rest of them chuckle.

"I told you guys it wasn't safe—"

"We all did." Monty pointed out.

"God, you couldn't have listened for once." Maya added.

"Hey, I'm the one in pain right now!" Jasper groans when Clarke applies pressure to his wound.

"Anyone got lighter?"

"Here." Octavia threw her way from one of the island drawers. To which the blond light the rounded needle, sterilizing it.

Jasper winced at the sight of this. "The Tylenol should help." She falsely reassures although she knew it that wasn't the case at all. Over-the-counter medication did basically nothing for the amount of pain he was currently in.

"Bleeding stopped, that's good... okay." Clarke exhales snapping on a pair of gloves from the kit before reaching for the plastic thread.

"This isn't that bad, Jas." She attempted to calm him down although the it didn't help what so ever.

...

The generator ended up working, lighting the whole cabin and more, Jasper having to pay the price.

He passed out the during the third stitch, which only made Clarke grateful because the expressions and sounds of excruciating pain coming from him were making her hands shake in anxiety, not helping her concentrate at all.

"Thank you." Maya voices softly to Clarke. She's sitting by his side stroking the sweat that pooled by his hairline off his face.

"It was nothing." The blond mumbles back. She watches them for a moment, more Maya than anything else. How she guides her eyes worryingly across his face as if looking for any indication he was in pain, how she placed her hand on his arm in support, how she loved him endlessly despite his random stupidity.

Jasper was a lot of things, he was wonderfully bright and humble although his goofy manner and witty comments sometimes covered that. But Clarke knew it's only purpose was to shield and protect himself from the harsh realities of the world and nothing more. He was a good friend, she knew that much.

"He's gonna be fine, Maya." Clarke reassures confidently when she notices the anxious expression on her face carries long after she's done.

"I'm gonna keep an eye on him for sign of infection and fever, but he'll be okay." She finishes offering the poor girl some confidence before stepping into the hallway to the nearest bathroom.

She rids of her gloves, stained in blood, washes her hands and takes a moment with her reflection to breathe in an out.

Clarke was a good doctor, when she had the right tools. Her mother often called her brilliant and at some point she chose to believe her, but tonight she didn't feel brilliant. Jasper was hurt the only thing she did was make him lose consciousness.

Then again she had to stitch him up, right? She couldn't have left him like that and risk infection.

Right?

Right.

The door knocks and instantly by the large feet that scruff the bottom of the wood outside, she knows who it belongs to.

"You okay in there, Griffin?" Bellamy questions.

She waits a second wanting nothing than a moment alone to dwell with her emotions and actions without him constantly there. Taking a deep breath Clarke proceeds to exit the bathroom, nearly swinging the door in his face.

She manages to get away but eventually he catches up to her. "Look, I'm sorry about Jasper."

She remains silent.

"But, hey, the generators up and running!" He offers. "Clarke?"

The blond keeps walking, this time up the stairs and to their room. "Clarke, can you just wait a minute—" She enters the room standing in the doorway, hand on the handle. He stops abruptly before her.

"What?" She's a pissed off. But she doesn't know if she's more frustrated at Bellamy for going out there or at herself for the way she handled Jasper. And at the moment she can't decide because her emotions are scrambled all over the place and him being there isn't helping at all.

"Look I'm sorry—" But he's quickly cut off by the ringing from his phone.

Miller. The caller ID identified. And Bellamy's heart sinks for he knows he had to get this call. His partner wouldn't be calling if it wasn't important.

He looks back up at Clarke who looks as if she was hanging on his last word.

"I-I gotta get this." He expresses and instantly was met with the door in his face once again, hearing the lock click in place.

"You can sleep alone tonight!" He hears her muffled yell through the door. He groans not having any other choice but to ultimately pick up the call.

"Miller?"

She draws again. The charcoal pencils running smooth lines against soft paper.

I have a thing for dead people. She presumes because her hands itch to draw the familiar faces of the fallen in her life. This time, her father.

She remembers the endless nights after his death she spend with a picture of his in her hands. Memorizing every wrinkle, every dimple, every feature until she was sure the image of him was forever etched in her mind. She dragged her fingers along the fine lines that made him, longing to have the one of Wells beside it. Longing to actually have both of them there instead of their blank faces across paper.

Even though it was nearly midnight the storm ragged on.

She set her drawing aside, reaching for her phone searching for Wells contact.

There were so many things she wanted to say, to write to him. So many problems sh needed guidance to, she felt lost, lost with her love for her best friends brooding brother, lost for the way she handled Jasper that night, lost for the way she was with her mother.

I'm a little lost, Wells.

Her shaky hands text his old number. A number she knew was disconnected. But never had the heart to erase.

She waits a moment, a part of her dwelling on the hope that somehow he would answer. Somehow. And the moment quickly passes leaving her with the notions of something all too familiar.

Her phone buzzes.

Error. Invalid number. Please re-send using a valid 10 digit number or a valid short code.

She shuts the phone off immediately, disappointed. What did she think was going to happen? A dead person was miraculously going to respond? Clarke was a rational person, even in her moments of weakness, except when it came to Wells or her father. Those, were something completely different.

She exhaled sharply, letting her emotions run aimlessly around her head for a moment in hopes it would somehow help ground her. And it did, a little.

And shortly after that, not able to stand being alone anymore she wonders out into the hallway and down the stairs half driven by the curiosity of where and what Bellamy was doing and her need to check up on Jasper.

She finds the Blake brother asleep at the kitchen island, a myriad of case notes, lists of suspects, crime pictures, pens, and posts its sprawled around his head like a halo.

She almost chuckles at the sight of him.

So this is why he needed the generator. She guesses. Work. The non-dividing factor between them. She smiles taking the image of him in before making her way to across the room where bandaged foot elevated in front of him, Jasper and Maya were asleep on the couch.

Clarke drops into a squat before them, hoping not to wake them. Holding her breath she slowly peels the bandages open in search for any sign of infection. When her eyes don't spot any clusters of yellow sprouting from the stitches she gently but tightly wraps his bandages back, allowing herself to breathe.

She then stands and bends over to reach his forehead. Her hand lingers on his warm head praying to god it didn't get any warmer than it already was so she wouldn't have to worry about a fever forming.

And her hand stayed the same temperature and she breathed in relief, even though a part of her wanted to get an actual thermometer and check his exact temperature, but not wanting to wake him up. she decides to leave that part for the morning granted there were no further complications in the middle of the night and turned her gazed to the two of them as a couple.

Maya was asleep beside him, hand clutching tightly to his, furrowed brow as if not sleeping comfortably as she had the past few nights. And Clarke had to give it to her, if she was in her position she'd probably be doing the same thing.

She pulled a blanket from the side of the couch, covering the both of them.

The blond sighed revealing a small smile before them before turning her attention back to the kitchen, to that man who lay asleep, head resting against the cold countertop, body wound tight against the high chair. She made her way back there, letting her hands trail the outline of his shoulders, bending her head to press her lips against one of them brining him awake.

"Bellamy." She mumbled. "Come to bed." Her words trailing soothingly down his spine.

"I thought I was sleeping on the couch tonight." He grumbled sleepily blinking himself awake.

Clarke drops her hands, and yawns. "Well," She stands there, eyes darting between him and the living room. "Obviously it's occupied... so I guess... that leaves me no other choice..."

He smiles, standing.

Together they gather his belongings into a neat pile and make their way upstairs.

"I'm sorry about Jasper. Really." He mumbles shortly after they climb back in bed. Clarke nods. "I know you are." She flips the light switch and climbs into bed turning away from him.

He wants to curl up beside her and sleep his worries off. He wants to run his fingers through her blond locks for ages, he wants to trail his fingers along every slope and curve of her body until he's memorized her whole.

And he thinks he's at a loss because he shouldn't feel this way about her. He shouldn't. It wasn't allowed. He wasn't allowed to feel this way about her. So why does he? Why does he always have that need to break the rules so strategically placed before him?

Maybe its because he's always been a rebel at heart: loved breaking the rules. Or maybe it's because he actually felt that way. He doesn't know. The only thing he's sure of is that he wouldn't mind the latter.

A dark hallway. Sounds of forced grunting. Screams echoing off walls. Scared Green eyes.

Bellamy jolts awake in cold sweat. Disoriented and trying to catch his breath he sits up nearly forgetting about the sleeping blond beside him.

He shifts to the side of the bed letting his legs hang before catching the floor. Cradling his head in his hands for a moment before, allowing his brain to catch up to actuality of and not the nightmares that haunted at the back of his mind until they twisted themselves into reality.

The clock on his phone reads 4:34 am and he only had three hours of sleep before he was rudely awakened.

He groans, attempting to get his heart rate down but knowing he won't be able to until he checks up on his sister. He'd been getting these dreams about her at the start of this case. His greatest fears came out to play in midst of all his findings, often dream his sister was the victim of one of these human trafficking cartels.

He rose to his wobbly, tired feet and creaked his way down the hall and to the front of Octavia and Lincoln's room. Hesitantly, he turned the handle, peeking his head through. All he needed was glimpse of her, safe and sound and everything would be okay.

She was sound asleep, curled next to her fiancé and he breathed out in relief, slowly shutting the door to a close.

A strange melody disturbs Clarke from her much needed sleep. The brightness of the flashing light from the phone bringing her awake. She turns to Bellamy's side of the bed, finding it oddly empty, and reaches for the phone. His phone.

Miller. Is spelled out in nice neat letters before her and she slides the ringer to right not wanting the loud rising to wake anyone else in the cabin.

"Bellamy, hey I know it's early but we got a lead on Casey and—"

"Uh, Bellamy's not… around. This is Clarke." She answers sheepishly, rubbing her eyes awake and climbing out of bed.

"Oh Clarke, right. Uh, Nathan Miller on the line—sorry did I wake you?"

"Yeah," The blond admits not wanting to lie. "It's fine, I'm used to it." And she is, her pager would constantly ring in the middle of the night when she wasn't on call. This was simply nothing new. "Let me find him for you."

"Thanks. Again, sorry. Didn't think Bellamy had any company." This surprisingly makes her chuckle.

"That makes two of us." She responds, thinking of their earlier dispute. She didn't think he'd be sleeping with her that night either.

"Bellamy's told me all about you." Miller goes on, filling the pregnant pauses as she paces down the stairs and back to the kitchen. "Oh, has he?" She challenges a little flattered then quickly confused for they were supposed to keep their agreement on the down-low.

"It took a while, most of it was a guessing game but I wouldn't be a good detective if I didn't know when my partner was keeping something from me would I?"

"That oddly makes sense." The blond realizes coming to the conclusion that she liked this Miller person.

She spots the tall brooding man struggling with the coffee maker in the kitchen. He stares at her in confusion for a moment before realizing what was happening, his heart suddenly filling with light when he see's her.

"found him." She exhales handing Bellamy the phone. "Your partner's on the line."

"I can't get that damn coffee maker to work." He admits trying to ignore the feeling that travels down to his somtach. The blond gazes into his eyes, they seemed different, as if somehow trouble and distributed by the tidings go the night.

But she nods. "I got it." She doesn't question his whereabouts at the time of the night—morning really, she simply made a note to ask him about it later. And has he talked into his phone, opening his laptop screen tentatively, taking his seat back that island counter. She started the coffee maker in his place.

Trying to keep herself busy, she makes her way into the living room to check up on Jasper once more. She does the same thing she did only hours before checking for signs of infection and fever, and once she doesn't find any she debates waking him to give him another dose of Tylenol, surprised he hadn't woken up form the pain she knew would surely come.

But Maya and him looked so at peace she didn't want to disturb them.

She heads back to the coffee maker, catching glimpses of Bellamy and Miller's conversation.

"Are you going to call him in for questioning? — What did Kane say about it? — No, Casey wasn't qualified for that line of work—Ask Nina she did a background check on him."

Clarke poured the brew into two coffee mugs. She put a fourth of milk before sliding it to him. His eyes said thank you as she turned to her attention back to her cup. "Alright, thanks. — I'll looking it into it. — Yeah, no problem," Bellamy meets his gaze as he plays with a small smile on his lips. "I will. Thanks Miller." He hangs the call up with an exhausted exhale.

"Miller says sorry for waking you up, again." He mumbles with a pleased smile.

"I like Nathan." The blond simply states making Bellamy nearly choke on his coffee. "I think you're the first person to call him by his first name in ages, Clarke."

"That's kind of sad." She comments taking a sip of her coffee.

"Nah, Miller is like a term of endearment to him." He shrugs it off, turning back to his laptop.

Silence shifts before them for a little while, Clarke leans against the counter across just watching him. "Work?" She questions the obvious.

"So much you have no idea. We got a lead on a new suspect and he's proving to be quite the wonder." He mumbles taking a gulp of the brew beside him. "Thanks for the coffee. Half asleep Bellamy couldn't to get that damn thing to work." He chuckled referring to himself in third person. Something she knew he did when he was stressed but trying not to pass as so.

"No problem… now, can I ask why you were attempting coffee at four am in the morning?" She goes on to question.

Bellamy stops, but his eyes not leave his computer screen. "Couldn't sleep."

"That's a lie." She states confidently. "You nearly passed out the moment your head hit the bed, Bell."

Damn. He cursed.

"That was just the exhaustion—I just have too many things running through my head. Can't really sleep when that happens."

She doesn't believe him but the tone in his voice indicates his wishes for her to drop this. She does, but makes another note to ask him about it later, when he's not so preoccupied with work.

"Alright." She shrugs pulling a seat on the opposite end of the island, and grabbing the nearby tablet.

"You're not going back to bed?" He questions in surprise. Clarke shakes her head. "I'm not tired anymore."

"Sorry."

"Stop apologizing. It's fine—plus this way I have time to check up on my patients."

"Right." He smiles her way for a moment watching the natural way she maneuvers into a sitting position, coffee in hand, hair falling so effortlessly around her, eyes trailing over the screen of the tablet.

That light feeling returns in heart and Bellamy can't help but think that's what love feels like.

...


Chapter inspired by numerous songs!

1. Something Real by Civilias

2. When All This Is Over by Voy Vance

3. Joy of Nothing by Foy Vance