He stared up from his bed, trying to focus on the design of the crisp, tray ceiling as he willed his eyes to close. Still, the words from his brother echoed in his mind and every second he forced his eyes to close, he found himself hearing them over and over again like some sort of deranged mantra.

"I'm telling you, Billy. I'm just saying that I've been the husband in this situation and it's not a great place to be. You and Phyllis have your issues right now, but I think you and I both know there are still feelings there and now there's a baby involved which means those feelings are only going to get stronger. There's no way this is not going to get ugly for everyone involved."

"It's not Jack. It can't. I don't want to hurt her any more than I already have. I don't want to mess up her life and she's happy here. She told me that right to my face and she's got a man that loves her and wants to be here for her and for my daughter. Why would I try to mess that up for her?"

"Because you love her and because love doesn't think or act rationally. Mark my words brother. If you keep going down this path, it's just going to get messy for all of you and now, you've got a baby girl that's going to be smack dab in the middle of it."

The sound of the city streets echoed through the window pane as he swung his legs off the side of the bed. Sleep was clearly not in the cards for him tonight. Street lamps and headlights seemed to come from every direction when he pulled the curtain aside and looked into the darkness outside. He wanted to believe that Jack was wrong. He needed to trust that he and Phyllis and Greg could put aside their own needs and wants for Libby's sake. But he also remembered how it had felt to see her again for the first time – even before knowing about Libby, the feeling that surged through him with the simply sound of her voice. To say that he missed her wouldn't even begin to describe it. He ached for her. His entire existence had seemed empty, lifeless, hopeless. With one look … she gave him purpose again and now she had given him even more. He had a daughter, a little girl that he could watch grow up and that was something he'd only dreamed of.

Jack was wrong. He loved Libby enough to put her happiness first. He loved Phyllis enough to put her happiness first and as long as he knew that she was where she wanted to be, he could respect that. He could and he would. She said she was happy. It wasn't about what he wanted anymore. It couldn't be.


His eyes opened slowly as his hand ran down the cool bedsheet where her body had been. "Phyllis?" he whispered. She had fallen asleep in his arms mere hours ago and now, she was missing from their bed. He could tell the conversation with Billy had been hard on her and, even though she'd been perfectly willing to answer all of his questions, it had been obvious that she was shielding him from the subtleties of their interaction.

Slowly he stood, the hardwood floor cool on his bare feet. If he were guessing, he'd find her in Libby's room. Her greatest comfort was watching their daughter sleep. He stopped suddenly as he reached the doorway, the irony of that thought now hitting him. Libby wasn't their daughter at all.

The nursery door was silent as he pushed it open ever so slightly. Libby lay sleeping in her crib, but Phyllis, much to his surprise, was nowhere to be found. As he backed out of the room, he noticed the soft light filtering out from the guest room. The room itself was empty but the closet, the one they used for storage wasn't. He could see her sitting there, a large cardboard box in her lap. Her shoulders shook slightly and it was clear that she was crying. On any other day, at any other moment, he would have approached her and tried to comfort her but tonight, in this moment, it almost felt as if he would have been encroaching on a very personal moment. A moment of which he was not a part.

Carefully and quietly, he moved back to their bedroom. She could be looking at anything, he thought to himself, but …

"Hey." Her shadow passed along the bedroom wall as she slowly passed through the threshold. "I thought I heard you up."

"Yeah." The tear stains that streaked down her face were barely visible in the soft light, but he knew now that they were there. "I uh … I wanted to check on Libby. When I saw that you were up, I figured maybe she was having a rough night and …"

"Oh. No. She's not. I'm actually having some trouble sleeping myself. I just went downstairs to make some tea and …" She paused. "Sorry if I woke you."

"No. You didn't. I just missed you next to me. That's all." His hand brushed across her empty side of the bed. "I like having you next to me."

"It's where I belong." She smiled as she climbed back into the bed and snuggled up beside him.

He closed his eyes as he felt her body next to his. "What about your tea?" he asked quietly.

"My what?"

"Your tea." Calling her on her lie really didn't make anything better. He knew this wasn't about keeping secrets. It was more about sparing feelings, but it still didn't make him feel better. He needed to get into that closet, to see what was in the box even though he was almost certain he already knew.

"Oh, right. That. I never actually got to even put the pot on. I heard you and I wanted to make sure Libby wasn't up. I know it's about time for her eat and … Well, you're missing some vital parts." She laughed, trying to lighten the slightly strained mood.

"Well, I'm just glad you're back. It's not the same when you're not here." He pulled her tighter against him and pressed his lips to her cheek. "Everything's better when I'm with you."