Chapter Eleven
The city outside of the school grounds seemed like a pretty normal, nondescript suburban town. There were plenty of trees and not too much traffic. I tried to keep an eye out for anything that stood out as weird or extra "Disney-ish" but nothing caught my eye. It all just seemed ordinary, which really wasn't a bad thing when I reminded myself I would have to try and get accustomed to living here.
I followed the directions Pocahontas had given me until I spotted the library, which was easy to understand why Belle had spoken so highly of. It truly was a majestic looking building, complete with classical architecture, gargoyles, and everything.
'If I end up having to live here, at least I'll have the gargoyles to talk to,' I thought. Maybe they'd be lovable wisecrackers named Victor, Hugo, and Laverne. Maybe I'd end up taking residence on the roof and would get so accustomed to being there that I'd never leave, until I turned into some kind of creepy, mythical hermit.
'The Library Hobo of the Disney Burbs.' Hmm. Didn't quite have the right ring to it. Perhaps I would do better if I grew a hump on my back.
I entered the large double doors and actually felt my breath catch in my throat. There were books everywhere. It sort of reminded me of this super cool hipster bookstore in Los Angeles, aptly called 'The Last Bookstore' on account of reading going extinct in Los Angeles, because in both places there were things actually made of books glued together. Like, they made up some of the walls and tables and designs. But mostly, there were just shelves and shelves stuffed full to the brim of every conceivable genre, except for maybe Russian language erotic space dwarf fiction. I've never actually found one of those anywhere. (In Japanese, sure. But in Russian? Never.)
I moseyed around through the beautiful building, passing by plenty of people thumbing through the shelves or curled up in comfy looking chairs in the corners, their noses glued to a book, rapturously inhaling every dusty page.
That was the thing. Most of these books actually looked old. It piqued my interest to wonder if there were a whole collection of published works that only existed in this world, and not in mine. What kind of fiction would be limited to a world populated by Disney characters? Then again, from what I had seen, this wasn't a world populated solely by Disney characters at all. It was just where I had ended up that contained the majority of them, at least to my knowledge.
I spotted the big circular information desk, but nobody was sitting there. It didn't take too much searching, however, before I found Belle helping a little kid in what appeared to be the dinosaur section. I quietly approached, keen to see how she interacted with the sticky little tyke. I personally get along with kids pretty well when I have to (I'm just a big kid myself, obviously), but I'll be the first to admit that they can be gross, disease-spreading little munchkins much of the time. The majority of little kids are walking, pint-sized epidemics infecting everything they so much as breathe upon, so I keep my distance when I can.
"I think you'd really like this one with the T-Rexes, Bobby," Belle was saying. "What do you think?"
At the mere mention of 'T-Rex' alone, the kid nodded eagerly. I wondered what the hell the sketchy green stains on his T-shirt were, and decided I didn't want to know.
Belle looked up at the shelves and then frowned. "Oh, it's up there on that shelf. I don't think I can reach it. We'll have to find a step-stool."
"Need some help?" I asked casually. They both looked at me.
"Who are you?" asked Bobby, one eye squinting. Little bugger probably had pink-eye and was wiping it all over the whole dinosaur catalogue.
Belle looked a little surprised to see me. "Bobby, this is my friend Shane. I'm not sure exactly what he's doing here but here he is."
"I might not be basketball tall but I can reach that book," I said.
Belle smiled wryly and crossed her arms. "Be my guest."
I was just tall enough to pull down the desired book and, feeling pretty pleased with myself, I handed it to the snot-nosed goober.
"Look at our knight in shining armor," said Belle.
"There you go, Billy," I said. "A hundred pictures of giant bloodthirsty lizards eating other, somewhat less giant bloodthirsty lizards."
"My name's Bobby."
"Sure it is. Run along now, Billy."
He gave me what appeared to be a resentful look (which didn't make any sense whatsoever; I had just come to the rescue and valiantly saved them from their debilitating shortness, so they had to be grateful, right?) but obeyed my command. He toddled off with his book tucked under his grubby little arm, and I grinned at Belle.
"What can I say, kids love me."
The face she made could hardly be described as a smile, but I figured that's what it had to be, lest I be faced with the alternative that she wasn't wholly impressed by my heroics. "You certainly have a way with them. So, what are you doing here? Stalking me or do you actually want to check out a book?"
"Stalking you, obviously," I replied. "No, actually, I was hoping to see if I could use some of your search databases on the library computers. Do you guys have Wikipedia here?"
"No, we're just poor, simple cavemen," said Belle. "Of course we have Wikipedia; where do you think you are exactly?"
I chuckled dryly. "That's a conversation for another day, baby doll."
"Okay, just so that that never happens again, let me just say it right now: Don't ever call me that again or I'll probably have to strangle you."
I shrugged. "All right, if you like Sugar-Tits more…"
"I thought we had made some progress from the douche-bag I thought you were this morning!" Belle said, looking around behind me as though I was hiding some kind of bad-manners gremlin who was secretly pulling my strings like a ventriloquist dummy. "Why are you backsliding? Did you suddenly become best friends with Gaston or something?"
"Sorry, sorry," I said. "I was just kidding. But I really do wanna check out the computers."
She shook her head but started to walk toward the stairs. "The good computers are upstairs. Follow me. And try to act like a civilized human being. Some people view this place as sacred."
"Yeah, yeah."
We ended up at a cluster of fancy, modern looking computers. Milo was sitting at one of them, some of his schoolbooks sprawled out around him.
"Here you go," said Belle, gesturing to an open seat next to Milo.
I took a seat and said, "So do they keep you pretty busy here? Does it get boring?"
Belle thought about it for a moment. "Some days, I suppose, it can get a little monotonous, re-shelving books and doing inventories. But I really love it here. I can't think of a job in this town I would want more."
"In town?" I questioned, knowing the answer to the question I was about to ask. "Do you have bigger aspirations outside of here?"
"Well, yeah," she said.
"Like what?"
"Don't get her started," said Milo.
"Oh hush, Milo," chided Belle, "Even you have to want more than what this town has to offer. The same old, same old, every single day. I know you do."
"That's what college is for."
Belle got quiet at the mention of college, before saying, "Ideally, yes."
Milo seemed to pick up on her sudden pensiveness and quickly added, "Belle, don't worry. You're going to get all the scholarships you need. You're going to be valedictorian, for Disney's sakes."
"I don't know how you can say that with such confidence, Milo. You don't know how it's all going to play out. Especially when I have you for competition."
"What do you wanna go do?" I asked Belle. "After you graduate?"
"I want to travel," she said, her eyes turning dreamy. "I want to go study abroad, I want to visit exotic places, meet interesting people, have some adventures…just do anything but stay here, growing old and dusty and letting life pass me by."
"It doesn't seem so bad here," I commented, not sure if I really believed my own words.
"You're still new here. When it's all you know, it loses its luster. The people are so small-minded and content to be unremarkable, here in this, this…little town…"
I felt a spurt of mischief rising up inside of me.
I remarked off-handedly, "It's a quiet village…"
Her eyes flickered ever so slightly. "Every day…"
"…like the one before…" I finished.
She frowned, continuing almost robotically. "Little town…full of little people…"
I could scarcely contain my grin as I gleefully whispered, "…waking up to sayyyy…"
"BONJOUR!" Milo blurted out suddenly, startling both himself and Belle. The two of them looked at each other and me in confusion. Somebody whispered, "SHHH!"
"You guys all right?" I asked, fighting my laughter. I could just imagine the host of townspeople from "Beauty and the Beast" beginning to pop up, with a chorus of Bonjour's and a huge choreographed dance number. No, wait, they didn't really dance, but they sure as hell sang in harmony. It was almost a shame it didn't actually go down right there in the library. But, as the cat had assured me, there would be no singing, dancing, or fantastical elements in this world. Just a reflection of real life.
Poor Belle and Milo, meanwhile, were completely bewildered at the inexplicable exchange we had all just had with each other.
"What just happened?" Milo asked.
My so-very-casual shrug was perhaps a bit overacted.
"I'm not sure," Belle said, still frowning, "I felt like, for a second…"
"Like our whole lives are scripted?" I offered. "That we're all just predestined characters without any semblance of free will written up in some big cosmic joke of a clichéd story?"
"What? No, I don't know," she said. She shook her head. "Anyway, my point is that, is that…" She hesitated before saying, "…every morning's just the same-"
"Since the morning that we came!" I crowed, unable to resist continuing, "To this poor provincial town-"
"GOOD MORNING, BELLE!" Milo unwittingly hollered, before clapping his hands over his mouth and squeaking the tiniest little squeak of horror.
Several people in the library looked over at us now, annoyed at the teenaged lunatics they probably assumed we must be, and all fiercely whispered, "SHHHH!" together. Maybe they thought the three of us had Tourette's or something.
I just burst out laughing and Belle put her hand to her head, looking dazed.
"I need…to get back to…work."
Her voice sounded a little distant. She gave me one last confused glance, then hurried and descended down the stairs to take her seat behind the information desk. I knew she must be pondering the bizarre sense of déjà vu she had to be feeling at the moment, and the thought still made me chortle to myself, with only the slightest hint of guilt lurking in my shriveled little conscience.
Did I feel like an asshole? Only a little. It was so very, very worth it. I regretted nothing.
I spent the next few hours poring over as much information as I could on Wikipedia. I barely even knew where to start or what I was really looking for, but after a near coma-inducing amount of clicking and page surfing, I found out that much of American history had remained the same. There was still a Revolutionary War, a Civil War, the two World Wars, and Vietnam. Sometime around the Second World War, though, a change occurred. There were no longer states, but rather provinces, in a bid for a new start for the country in the wake of near global subjugation or annihilation from the Axis threat. There weren't 50 of the provinces either. They all had names like Adventure Land, Frontier Land, Fantasy Land, and things like that. Our province was literally called "Disneyland." We were in the capital, Disney City. That was all pretty simple to remember. Disneyland, Disney City, Disney High. Disney, Disney, Disney.
Apparently, Walt Disney had become president at some point and became some type of omnipresent benevolent dictator. He had been instrumental in a lot of the changes that were already sweeping the nation, like the provinces replacing states and a lot of interesting laws and statutes I couldn't even begin to list. But try to imagine if Disneyland (the theme park) ran the country and you can get a little idea of what his extended presidency was like. 'Merica the beautiful may not have been the happiest place on Earth in actuality, but damned if we didn't try to pretend like we were, apple pie and baseball and the whole kit and caboodle. Interestingly, in this timeline, Desert Storm, the September 11th attacks, and the resulting "War on Terror" had never occurred.
Disney High was opened in the year 1937. Walt had died in 1966, his failing health coinciding with the United States getting involved in Vietnam and the advent of the big youth counter-culture Frollo had mentioned earlier. For the decades following, there was often a clash between older generations wanting to stick to the near puritanical days of the Disney regime, and younger generations wanting to rebel against the wholesome façade the government had fought so hard to instill in the greater American culture. Despite the inevitable rebellions, it appeared that the Disney values had mostly won out, with each generation eventually coming to accept and assimilate with the collective social consciousness.
Which brought us to the current generation, the one that I was now apparently part of. They seemed to be caught somewhere between the apathy of the 90's and the shallow, vicarious mindsets all the technological innovations of the 2000's had created in everyone. They…we…were content to just sit back and let the magic drop into our laps. It was better than having a genie in a lamp. There was no wish limit. New, exciting advancements were happening every day, it seemed like. It took no effort on our parts, no real participation, just the simple exchange of money. Our generation was largely just consumers; we weren't the innovators or inventors. We were just customers in a never-ending drive-thru, with a million windows but no exit. It was a disturbing parallel to my own world, one that I didn't want to dwell thinking about.
It made sense to me that Belle would want to get a taste of something new, something real beyond the cookie cutter exterior of this reality's American culture, plastered top to bottom in little happy face stickers and government manufactured fairy dust.
I nearly shuddered thinking about it. There was something almost positively sinister about it all, festering deep beneath the sickly sweet, saccharine façade that everyone was so accustomed to. There was no room for dirt or scandal in a world like this; it had to be quickly swept under the rug and erased from all existence. It was no wonder that people like Al, Meg, and Esmeralda were viewed with such contempt by the teachers and most of the other students. They truly were outcasts, dark stains on a whitewashed wall stretching as far out as anyone alive could remember seeing.
I knew that I definitely wasn't a Boy Scout myself; not even close. For the first time, I actually felt a tinge of real dread down in the pit of my stomach. Even though it wasn't real, couldn't be real, it was close enough that I feared what could await me if I made enough missteps. Would some kind of Mickey Mouse-eared secret police come and round me up, drag me away to some dark dungeon like in "Aladdin", and throw away the key so that I would disappear, never to return to the happily ever after? Would the stupid Cat even bail me out of that kind of hopeless situation, or would he just howl with his typical cruel laughter before evaporating for one last time into the shadows, leaving me there to rot for eternity, a victim of my own misguided arrogance?
I didn't want to find out.
Maybe it was because of a lack of food and one too many hours in front of a glowing screen, but by the time I went down the library stairs to find Belle, I was feeling very strange. I couldn't quite explain what it was…something between uneasiness and fright…like if you were to spend all night assuring a small child that there was no monster lurking in their closet and right when you were stepping out the door, after you had finally convinced the innocent youngling that they truly had nothing to fear, you caught a glimpse of glowing red eyes and a hideous grin leering in the darkness. The feeling of spilling milk you've already begun to drink onto the floor, and suddenly realizing that it's rotten. Why couldn't you taste it? How long have your senses been deceiving you? What else have you been putting into your body that's gone bad long ago?
Almost everybody had left the library by then. Milo had departed hours ago, saying he already had homework to get to. The sun had mostly set and I didn't welcome the arrival of the darkness. Loneliness was looming in the shadows. If you think you've ever felt lonely, try to imagine being trapped in a fantasy realm where you were the only real, thinking, breathing entity in the entire world, at least as far as you could tell. That's being alone. That's loneliness.
Belle had her sweater on, and looked like she was getting things together so she could lock up and finally head home. I imagined it was warm and cozy, most likely modest but still full of what the dreamers would call "love." A natural cynic (but you already knew that), I didn't really go for any of that mushy sweet mumbo-jumbo, but it still beat the alternative, which was trying to hide in the library all night, with nothing but books to use as pillows. The library might be beautiful in the day but I was willing to bet it was a lot creepier alone in the dark.
She must have seen something in my eyes because she immediately asked, "Are you okay?" She actually sounded concerned, God bless her little Disney heart.
"What?" I asked, distracted. "Uh, yeah. Yeah I'm fine."
Belle didn't seem convinced. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I'm just a little tired and hungry, I guess."
"Yeah, it's getting late. Did you drive yourself here or…?"
I made an uncomfortable face. "Uh, no, not exactly…"
"Do you have someone coming to pick you up?"
I didn't really know how to explain such a largely unexplainable predicament to her but I knew I'd have to tell her something, so I said, "Belle, can I tell you a secret?"
She hesitated for a moment before saying, "Yes, of course."
Call me stupid or lame or whatever, but I actually had trouble making eye contact with her. Was that shame I was feeling? I think it was. I shouldn't have been feeling embarrassed to admit anything to a fictional character; I wasn't homeless in real life and I certainly didn't need her pity, but there was still something just instinctively humiliating about admitting you had absolutely nothing to your name…not a home, or a family, or anything.
"I don't really have a place to stay, exactly…" I finally said, wishing I could fast forward through the inevitable awkwardness that was bound to proceed from this confession.
"What do you mean?" asked Belle. "Where do you live?"
"That's the thing," I said, "I don't live anywhere, actually."
"You-you don't?"
"No."
"I don't understand. How did you get here? Where did you come from?"
All I could do was helplessly shake my head. "I couldn't even begin to tell you. But I was sent here to go to this school, only I wasn't given anything to help me. I didn't get to pack any clothes or money or anything. I wasn't even given a place to stay."
She stared at me, unable to comprehend what she was hearing, which admittedly sounded a little out there. "That doesn't, I'm sorry, that doesn't make any kind of sense to me. Who sent you here? Don't you-do you have a family?"
"They live very far away. They don't know I'm here."
"Why not?"
"I didn't really have much of a choice in the matter. It's hard to explain."
Belle looked like her head was swimming. "Is this…is this like some kind of joke? Because I'm not picking up on the humor."
"No, it's not a joke, Belle. I swear everything I'm telling you is the truth."
"So you're telling me you were forced to move to this city without having an actual place to move to?"
"Yes."
"But you have to go to school."
"Yeah."
"Who's making you do this?"
"I can't…really talk about it."
"It's hard for me to believe any of this, Shane. None of it makes any sense."
"I know it doesn't. But it's the truth. I swear."
"Why'd you have to come here?"
"It wouldn't make sense to you. Maybe I'll be able to tell you later, but I can't right now. I have to figure out what I'm gonna do first."
"What you're going to do?"
"I was wondering if, maybe…you could let me crash here for the night?"
"Here? At the library?"
"I don't know where else to go."
Belle put her hand to her head in distress and started to talk very quickly. The poor girl was quite flustered by my surreal dilemma. "I-I mean, no I can't leave you here, I'd lose my job. And, I'm sorry, Shane, but how am I supposed to know you're not going to steal or destroy anything? It's not, like, my personal library. It's not my property. I can't just, let you live here…"
I sighed. "I know. I'm sorry. It was stupid to ask. I just…do you know anywhere I could go for now, just for the night?"
She just stood there, trying to come to grips with everything I was throwing at her. I felt really horrible, despite the logical part of my brain telling me to remove myself from the situation. It shouldn't have mattered to me. But I still felt like an idiot.
"I'm sorry to put this on you, Belle," I mumbled. "I know it's not fair, but I just felt like you were the most trustworthy person I could go to. It's embarrassing to be so helpless but I'm completely on my own out here, with no one to turn to."
"You promise what you're telling me is true?" she asked me, looking directly into my eyes.
I was able to answer with utter conviction, "Yes. I promise. It's true."
"But you can't tell me who's behind this or why."
"No."
"Is it dangerous?"
"No, no it's not-I mean, I don't know. I don't think so. But I don't really know anything."
"This is such a trip." She let out a little disbelieving laugh, as though she wasn't quite sure if she was dreaming or not. Hell, maybe she was. Maybe we both were. "I was not expecting this today."
I laughed weakly. "Neither was I."
"Okay," Belle said. "Okay. I'm going to figure this out. I don't know why, but I feel like you're telling the truth, bizarre as it sounds. I really hope I'm not wrong about that."
"You're not."
"I'm going to call my dad. He's coming to pick me up. You can probably eat dinner with us at my house tonight-"
"Oh wow, thanks, Belle-"
"-but I don't think you can spend the night. I mean, it's just my dad and me there, and you're a boy, and I just met you today."
"No, no, I completely understand."
"But I'm going to figure out where we can put you for tonight. I'll call someone, or something. But first, we can just lock up the library and then we'll have dinner at my house. Okay?"
"Yes, okay," I said, feeling the slightest bit of relief. "Thank you so much, Belle."
She just shook her head again. "This is so crazy. I don't know what's making me believe any of it. I shouldn't be. I really shouldn't." She turned suddenly and pointed at me. "You owe me though, after this is over. If I help you get through whatever it is you're going through, you owe me."
"Yeah, totally. Anything you want."
"I can't really think of anything I could want from you." Her eyes narrowed. "But I will."
Could this be turned into a potential invitation for future boning? In real life, it wouldn't be, because real life isn't a stupid porno, but maybe this world would reflect the senseless anarchy in the "plots" of pornographic films. In those movies, there is little to no justification necessary for people to start bumping uglies. It can be any place, any time, and any amount of people before they start to up and hitch up to the shaggin' wagon.
'Hey there, Ma'am, I'm the plumber, I understand you have something wrong with your pipes?'
Yeah, I wish.
"I am your slave for life," I said to Belle, half hoping she would suddenly rip off all her clothes and drag me to her kinky book dungeon. Maybe she'd read Chaucer aloud as she whipped me. Would that even be pleasurable? Shit, I was willing to try it.
Unfortunately, Belle wasn't a deranged sex fiend, so that didn't happen.
"That won't be necessary," she said. "But you know what, what I do want is for you to tell me the truth about what's really going on. It doesn't have to be right now, but eventually, I want you to tell me. Okay? Do you got that?"
I wasn't too wild about those terms but what could I say to her? I was backed into a corner.
"Shane!" she said after I failed to respond at all. "Do you understand? That's our arrangement. I'll help you if you tell me the truth about it all later. But only if you agree. Do we have a deal?"
I sighed. "Fine. Okay."
Belle thrust her hand out and I looked at it for a moment before weakly shaking it. The velvety softness all of a sudden felt much less velvety. Maybe it was me.
"Deal," she said. "I can't get involved in such a surreal scenario without eventually finding out the reason. It would drive me crazy for the rest of my life."
"That's a little melodramatic."
"Your weird little life is melodramatic!"
I laughed, despite myself. She definitely had a point there.
{Oh man. Sorry for all the unexpected angst thrown in there, but how would you feel if you were trapped all alone in an alternate dimension with no food, friends, clothes, or shelter? Still, we're moving right along. I had some fun trying to imagine what this world's history would be like, sort of like how "Watchmen" tried to create a plausible alternate history resulting from the presence of superheroes. How would a country with Walt Disney as a smiling "Big Brother" type of dictator turn out? Still, I don't want to spend too much time exploring the background of this Disneyland America (that's not what you're here to read about, at least I think it's not) but I thought it might be interesting to throw in there a bit…create a little more illusion of reality.
Anyway, hope you enjoyed this latest chapter. Might be a little while before the next update because I have a paper to write and a math test to study for. (Dear math, you have my full permission to go jump off a bridge. Sincerely, me.) Don't forget to let me know what you think! Thanks, everyone.}
