For those that were expecting a chapter with some romance, here it is!
But we all know this is isn't a normal romance fic, right? This is a fic with romance Smash Bros. Style!
Anyway, I'm now without my beta-reder, which means the grammar ghost is back (audience screams in horror). Yeah, I know. So, if someone could kindly step in and volunteer to get my story reviewed for grammar and spelling mistakes, I would really be glad.
Chapter 12
Day Off
Link woke up with a strange headache after having a strange dream, where he was slaughtering monsters while his friends passed by him and he said "hi" to them with his friendly expression on, right before returning to gut alive the creatures that plagued Hyrule. Now, he had dreams of violence before, but never one like that.
Must have eaten something rotten yesterday. Link thought as he sat and shook his head, trying to disperse the buzzing on his head and pain he was feeling.
The Hero looked to his side and saw in the digital clock it was 10:30 a.m. Link raised his eyebrow at that. It was passed ten and Samus hadn't come to wake him up for another day of job. That was definitely strange. He brought his hand to his head again, just thinking brought him pain. What the hell did he do last night? He couldn't even remember.
It was then the green clad swordsman noticed something strange. Since when did he have a digital clock? Or when did his room have been reverse and cleaned? He couldn't even see the table of their joint. Or better yet: why was he just in his underwear?
It was then Link slid his hand to the side and felt something at his side on the bed; something that felt much like human skin. He looked to the side and saw a lump in the bed, covered by the blanket and with blond strands sticking out.
Oh please goddesses, don't let it be what I'm thinking it is. Link thought as he reached for the blanket to uncover the "mysterious lump".
It seemed that the Hylian warrior wasn't in good terms with the goddesses, because when he pulled the covers down, his fears confirmed; Samus was sleeping at his side. With quite a content smile on her face, might I add.
Link yelped, jumped to the side and fell from the bed, awakening Samus, who calmly stretched her arms up. Samus was also just in her underwear. Yeah, apparently she uses it. Link blushed until the tone of his face matched the color of Mario's cap.
Samus then noticed Link on the floor, with a look of pure fear on his face. The bounty huntress greeted in the most casual manner:
"Hey Link."
"I SWEAR I DID NOTHING!" Link got up, shouting. Samus just looked to him with a look of confusion. "I-I JUST WOKE UP HERE AND… !"
"Hey, hey, chill out. Why are so scared? Weren't you supposed to be the Mr. Courage Triforce or something like that?"
"A-aren't you angry with me?' Link asked, thinking he was missing something there.
"Why should I?" Samus asked like there was no point in what Link was saying.
The Hero then felt like nothing more made any sense. Here he was, just in his boxers, in the room of the toughest woman in all over the galaxy, who would kill somebody should he even point out details in her bodily figure. However, Link was surprisingly still alive, breathing and with no part of his body injured in the slightest. It was then he realized there was just one rational explanation for what happened:
"Did… did we… did it last night?"
Samus looked to him and soon had a seductive smile on her face. Link had an almost shocked expression on his face, thinking:
But… when I… ? … it's… who… 7+2… clouds… forest green? apparently, his mind was a confusion right now as he tried to process the information.
"Not exactly, though I really would have liked if we had continued." Samus added, keeping that seductive tone and smile which made Link's face get so red people might think he was a lighthouse with red light. "We cuddled more than anything." Samus said. Link detected some disappointment in her voice.
Trying to think on another thing, Link saw his clothes were scattered around the room. That made he remind of his mornings with Midna. It was then he located a bottle in a nearby table. A very familiar bottle.
The Hero approached it while Samus got up. He picked up the bottle and saw it was empty. There were two glasses in the table too. He then read the name of the drink and saw it was named "Twilight Delusion". Link narrowed his eyes at that.
Midna. it was the conclusion the Hero came to as he turned to Samus and inquired, pointing to the bottle:
"Samus, did we drink this last night?"
"Yes." she said simply. "And I have to say; three glasses and you were already all over me like a hungry wolf." she said in a tone of someone that found the memory very amusing.
"And who gave you this?" Link asked, trying hard not to blush at Samus' remark. He remembered a certain someone commenting on him having a similar behavior in the past.
"Oh. Midna gave me. She said it would help to 'warm up our relationship'."
"And I suppose it did warm up." Link said more to himself in a statement, not a question. If you consider the fact you woke up in Samus' room, just in your underwear and with hangover, I would say it did warm up.
"Yeah, but you fainted before we could get to the good part. She said it could have this effect, since it is very strong for people that aren't used to drink."
Link sighed again. Now Midna was helping Samus to get him to her bed. What kind of ex-girlfriend does something like that? Weren't they supposed to do the exact opposite? What was this? Some kind of story somebody was writing for other people's entertainment?
Well…
Anyway, Link started picking up his discarded clothes around the room and was ready to go back to his own room until he noticed Samus was leaning against the door, arms crossed and a sly expression in her face. The futuristic woman then asked, eying him with what seemed to be hungry eyes, making the Hylian warrior very uneasy:
"And where do you think you're going?"
"Back to my room?"
"No, you're not."
"No?" Link asked in a rather dumb manner as Samus approached him.
The Hero's eyes wandered to the galactic warrior's well built body and… here he looked to the side, blushing once more for what seemed to be the tenth time just this morning. Samus then grabbed his clothes and threw them to the side, putting a finger on his chest, which wasn't so difficult since she was taller than him.
"You're staying here, with me." she said with a grin on her face that made Link start to sweat.
"But… but…" the Hero tried to say, but his mind was unable to concentrate in any though with Samus this close to him and with what she was wearing (or not).
"C'mon. There's nothing to worry about. I just want to have some fun with you."
"L-like what?" Link asked
"And you still ask. Are you that oblivious or what?" I would say he just isn't able to think straight at the moment, Samus.
Before Link could reply, Samus silenced him with a breathtaking kiss, making the two fall in the floor. However, someone knocked on her door, interrupting her plans. Growling in anger, Samus turned to look to Link and saw he was practically paralyzed, just breathing deeply.
Good. He won't be able to escape like this. Samus thought, smiling. She then got up and went to the door, snatching her Paralyzer in the way. I swear, if it is the Dumb Trio or any of the villains, Master Hand will need to find replacements.
The bounty huntress opened the door just a bit, so the person outside wouldn't notice her lack of clothing. I don't see the point, considering her Zero Suit isn't something that hid her… attributes very well either. Through the crack she saw it was Ness.
She considered scare the little boy away or just give him a cold treatment for interrupting her fun. But she remembered she would hear it latter from either Peach or Zelda. Grumbling again, Samus poked her head to the corridor, asking what was it to the PSI boy.
"I came here to bring you your clothes, Samus." Ness said, with his cheerful expression on and handing her the Zero Suit she had sent to wash the other day.
"Thanks." she said, taking the suit. "Now can you go and play somewhere else? I'm doing something very important."
"Like what?" Ness asked.
Oh great. He's curious today. Can't a woman have some innocent fun without interruption around here?
Someone care to explain me which part of what she's doing can be considered innocent?
Nobody? Figures. After all, who cares for the narrator? You know, I should just ditch this and let you all wondering what is happening by yourselves. But I also need money to buy food, so…
Right when Samus was going to speak, Pit passed near her door and heard her talk with Ness. Turning to the bounty huntress and the dark haired boy, the angel approached as Samus spoke:
"Something only for adults."
"Like what?" Pit and Ness asked at the same time.
She looked from one to the other. Was today the "Interrupt Samus' Fun Day"? Now she had not just a little kid, but also an angel to give explanations for. And she had to watch her tone around them or she would have a discussion with Peach, Zelda and possibly Palutena latter, which would certainly give her a headache.
An idea came to her and Samus smiled. Oh-ho, what is she thinking now? The bounty huntress then spoke to the two innocent boys:
"The same thing Pit wants to do with his boss." correction, one innocent boy and a not-so-innocent angel, because when Samus said that, Pit blushed as mental images came to his head immediately after.
"Y-y-you c-can't prove a-anything!" Pit protested.
If Samus were Phoenix Writhe, she would probably shout "OBJECTION!" now. But since that would result in copyrights issues, the galactic warrior just said, in a tone that rivaled Midna's sly one:
"Oh really? Then why are you getting so red and is stuttering?"
Ness then looked to Pit with a confused look, probably wondering what Samus meant with that and why was Pit looking like he was caught doing something wrong. The PSI fighter then asked, letting the typical, child curiosity pick up again:
"Yeah, why are you looking so nervous, Pit?"
The angel started to sweat, looking from a grinning Samus to the dark haired boy and feeling like he was under interrogatory. Pit then did the only think he could and ran away, shouting prayers of forgiveness for Palutena by picturing her with… something that I can't describe here due to the rating censor.
Ness ran after Pit, wanting to know what the angel had thought that could make him act like he had done something nasty. I think a better word would be "naughty". Anyway, Samus chuckled and closed the door of her room, locking it so nobody would interrupt her. It had already been difficult enough to get Link to come to her room alone yesterday.
Samus turned and saw him sitting in her bed, looking around her room, but not in a "isn't there a way to escape this prison?" way. It was more like a "oh, so this is where she put her weapons when she's not using them" way.
"Wow. Already giving in? That sure was fast." Samus mused. She expected for him to try and escape.
"Well, considering your window is locked and the one in your bathroom is too small for me to fit." Link said. Samus then looked to him with a raised eyebrow. The Hero then realized what he had said and lowered his head in embarrassment. "Sorry. I guess I'm just too nervous."
"Just because of that, I won't let you have breakfast." guess Link really is her prisoner, huh?
"Oh, c'mon. I'm hungry." Link protested. Truth to be told he was quite hungry.
"Oh… really?" Samus asked, with a naughty grin coming to her face.
Link's expression of protest dropped immediately after seeing the smile on Samus' face. He suddenly felt like he said something that sounded double meaning in that situation.
"Can't we just talk about it?" Link suggested as Samus approached him in a way that made he blush once more.
"Shut up and kiss me, will you." Samus said, sitting besides Link and placing her lips upon his, silencing any further protests from the Hylian warrior. Honestly, I don't even know why he would want to protest.
- / - / - / -
Lunch time had come. The swordsmen of the mansion, plus Zelda, Peach and Mario where sitting in a single table. Marth then spoke up, stopping to eat:
"Did anyone sight Link? He was supposed to spar with me this morning."
"No. Haven't seen him the entire day." Mario said.
"Me neither." Peach spoke.
"Same here." Ike said.
"Hum. So none of you have seen him…" Meta Knight thought aloud.
"I think it's him and Samus entering now." Zelda pointed to the door.
The group turned and saw it were indeed Link and Samus. It was then something about the two of them called the attention of the group of heroes and anti-hero:
"Are they having a bad hair day?" Peach pointed out.
"Well, Link's hair does seem messier than the usual." Zelda said.
"Not talk about Samus'." Ike spoke.
"Maybe they couldn't sleep this night." Mario suggested.
"I wonder what would keep them awake." Marth wondered.
As the group discussed their theories, Mate Knight rolled his eyes behind his mask, thinking:
And I come from an E rated game, yet I can clearly see what happened between those two. Honestly, there are days they are just too blind to notice these things.
Meanwhile, Link and Samus were serving themselves. The green clad swordsman still couldn't believe that they just did… it. But he had to admit he liked that. Well, you'd to be very dumb not to like doing it. I mean, and it was with Samus for crying out loud!
The two then sat on their usual table in silence… for five seconds.
"So, what are your plans for today?" Samus asked her boyfriend.
"What do you mean?"
"We agreed to have a day off. Don't you remember?"
Link mumbled an "uuuuhhh", trying to remember when they had talked about it. All he could remember about last night was that he entered Samus' room, she offered him a glass and the rest was pretty hazy.
"Well, since it seems you don't have anything planned, I'll think of some activities for us." Samus said. Link eyed her. The bounty huntress then added. "It's not just that, I swear. But in case you want…"
"I wasn't thinking about it!" Link quickly justified himself. "I just thought that it is kinda strange for you to volunteer to do something with someone without thinking in gains."
"Don't get me wrong, I do expect to gain something. But don't you think that if I really did gain something out of it, wouldn't it actually be a consequence of us being together doing some kind of activity, which resulted in me gaining something from you?"
"I suppose you're right. But even so that … wait. Now I got confused. What were we talking about again?"
To speak the truth, I have no idea either. In any case, let's focus on something more interesting that was happening in a table near Link and Samus' one. Like Ness and Lucas who were trying to get the last of cheese sauce in a cup to put in their spaghetti and were at this moment holding the cup at the same time and trying to pry it off the other's hand. How the sauce didn't fall while they were doing it? Well, have you noticed how most of the time phisics' laws don't have any real meaning in the life of videogame characters?
"Give me that! You ate all of my pancakes yesterday, Ness." Lucas complained.
"No way! You ate the last cookie in the jar the other day." Ness said.
"C'mon. Can't you two share it?" Toon Link suggested, not wanting to see his friends fighting.
Ness and Lucas stopped for a moment and considered it, looking to each other. Ten seconds later, they were back at their little game of tug-o-war. Toon Link sighed and thought how he could stop his friends from fighting each other. He then decided to ask for advice from the most mature person he knew.
The young swordsman jumped out of his table and ran to Link's table, who was now talking with Samus about what they could do today. That is, until Toon Link interrupted them:
"Samus! Samus! I need your help! Ness and Lucas are fighting over the last of cheese sauce."
…
Can someone explain to me why Toon Link is asking help for Samus?
"And why exactly are you asking for my help?" Samus asked, repeating what I just said once more! "Link is right here, you know?" she said, pointing to the Hero, who was trying his best not to be noticed, but grumbled once his girlfriend pointed him out.
"I thought about it, but Zelda said girls are better in solving thinks in a rational way, or something like that."
"Oh, and what am I? Some kind of violent swordsman who jumps on people trying to slice their throats open?" Link questioned, narrowing his eyes.
"Hey, blondie." Ganondorf called from his table, at some distance. "How was your morning? Did you have trouble finding your way back to your bathroom? I heard the probabilities of someone with your hair color getting lost in his own house are quite high. Hahahaha!" Ganondorf laughed, with the other villains in his table.
"I'M GOING TO SLICE YOUR THROAT OPEN!" Link shouted, drawing his sword and charging at Ganondorf.
Samus and Toon Link just stared at the more realistic Hero starting yet another battle with his arch-nemesis. The bounty huntress sighed and turned to Toon, deciding to ignore Link's sudden violent tendencies.
"Anyway, why don't you ask for Zelda then?" Samus suggested.
"I would, but she already finished her food and left. Please, Samus. Help me." Toon Link asked again, now making use of the ultimate tactic children make use of to get someone to do something for them: the puppy eyes! Thunders flash in the background.
"You know that doesn't work on me, do you?" Samus reminded him, with her eyes narrowed.
Dropping the puppy eyes, Toon Link recurred to the second most effective tactic that children had to convince reluctant adults to do what they wanted: annoy the crap out of them! Insert "dun dun duuuuuun" sound here.
"Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please…" Toon Link said several times.
"ARGH! Okay! Just stop asking!" Samus yelled, getting up.
"Thanks a lot, Sam." Toon Link said, with a smile.
Samus grumbled all the way to Lucas and Ness. She hated it when people called her by nicknames like that. The bounty huntress then arrived at the boy's table and stood near Ness and Lucas with her arms crossed.
The two psychic boys noticed a shadow looming over them and turned to see Samus, with a stern look on her face that made the two gulp. It was of general knowledge Samus didn't have much patience with children. Not that she didn't like them, she just didn't like having to take care of them. The idea of motherhood in her life was replaced long ago by plans on how she could make the lives of the Space Pirates a living hell.
"Ok. What's up here?" Samus asked, looking from Ness to Lucas.
"H-he wants the l-last of sauce, but I-I got it first." Lucas timidly said, intimidated by Samus' presence. The blond boy was never the most courageous of the Smashers.
"That's a lie! I got it first." Ness said, looking from Lucas to Samus.
"No, it was me." Lucas shot back, now looking to Ness and seeming to forget Samus was still there, looking to them with a cold stare.
"Me!" Ness insisted.
The two boys started to discuss while they pulled the cup again. The bounty huntress' patience ended five seconds after the fight restarted. She then took the bottle from the two boys and threw it in the air. What? I wasn't joking when I said she didn't have much patience to deal with children.
"There! If you don't know how to share, then none of you get it. Happy now?" Samus said.
While the galactic warrior scolded to the PSI boys, the cup of cheese sauce flew through the hall and, tracing its flight curse, one could already guess it would end up falling in Dedede's plate, who was busy at the moment watching Ganondorf and Link struggle against each other.
The penguin king then felt sauce splat on him as he got up, seeing his robe stained and his steak ruined as he proclaimed:
"What the… ? Whose idea this was? Don't you know I'm allergic to cheese? Who dares to ruin the meal of the king?" Dedede demanded in an angry tone. He then looked to a nearby table, where Kirby was sitting. The star warrior looked back to the "chubby" king with a look of cute confusion. "You!" Dedede said, pointing to Kirby. "You're gonna pay for that you pink, piece of marshmallow!"
Dedede then took one of wolf's slice of lasagna and threw it at Kirby, ignoring the protests of the space mercenary. Now, if Dedede had stopped to think at his actions, he would know that throwing food at Kirby was completely useless, since the pink marshmallow would most likely eat it and have a contempt smile on its face as he did it.
However, the thing is: Dedede had a very poor aim, so instead of hitting Kirby (or being swallowed by him) the slice of lasagna ended up hitting Mr. Game & Watch, who beeped angrily and threw one of his 2D pancakes.
"FOOOOD FIIIGHT!" Crazy Hand screamed from his and his brother's table at the very end of the dining hall, in isolated position. However, it soon wouldn't matter, for all of the Smashers started to throw food at each other.
Master Hand just observed all of his prized fighters throwing food at each other, dirtying the entire hall in a matter of seconds. Some even started to throw silverware and the tables and chairs, ignoring the basic rules of food fight. The giant, floating, white hand then mumbled to himself:
"C'mon, what's the problem in building a dining hall? You're already building a mansion for crying out loud!" he stopped and sighed. "Honestly, Myamoto probably never had to deal with all of them together…"
- / - / - / -
Amongst the terrains at the back of the mansion there was a pool area. There you had two pools: one of middle dept for the children and one of Olympic size for the adult Smashers. However, there were days none of them used it, since either they were too busy with their matches or just out of paranoia. For example: what if there were paparazzi peeping them from the trees, just waiting to get a good photo of the Smashers in swimsuits? Or rather, what if the villains suddenly realized a pool would be the ideal place to simulate an "accident" that would incapacitate their respective nemesis?
However, this was one of those days when the Smashers were a bit less paranoid about people trying to invade the little privacy they still had in the mansion. As a result, there were some people around the terrains of the pool. The place was surrounded by tall stone walls and it had a back entrance door which the Assist Trophies used to access the pool area when they wanted to relax too (though they also suffered of the same paranoia when they considered going to the pool).
Olimar was floating in the surface of the water using a trouser in his tiny body and still with his helmet. He was peacefully relaxing when he suddenly sensed a shadow looming over him, followed by a shout of:
"GOROH BOMB!"
The other F-Zero racer known as Samurai Goroh hit the water, throwing Olimar out of the pool and into the concrete floor around it. As the little captain sat up, with stars dancing around his head, Samurai Goroh emerged from the water, proclaiming:
"Ah! See that? That's why Goroh has the best aquatic bomb ever, Falcon!"
Captain Falcon was at the border of the pool, arms crossed and looking at Samurai Goroh. It seemed that Falcon didn't take his helmet off even when he went to the pool. The F-Zero champion had a look of disdain in his face as he looked at another attempt of his rival to surpass him. He was using a… just a minute, please…
…
Hello. Hum… do I really have to narrate this?
…
I have if I want to get paid… why are you so cruel with me?
…
What do you mean I'm oppressing your creativity? … hello? Hello?
Great. Well, then… Falcon was using a speedo. There. Now excuse while I go tend to my bleeding eyes.
"Hah! Please. Like you could ever compare to the pure awesomeness that Captain Falcon is." Captain Falcon said, talking of himself in the third person. Very modest, isn't him? "Just watch!" Falcon then walked to the other border of the pool.
Meanwhile, under the shadow cast by the trees planted outside the stone walls, sitting in two sunbathing chairs, were Link and Samus. Surprisingly enough, the two were wearing garments other than their regular green outfit/Zero Suit. Samus had a blue bikini, which seemed to be a swimsuit version of her Zero suit, since it had the same design and the symbol in the chest was just the same. Link was using a green trouser. Do you all of you see the patterns here?
The two were relaxing, just like the other Smashers around, though Samus was also interested in looking at Link's figure and having he notice her figure too. Honestly, I hardly see how that would be any different from when she is wearing her Zero Suit. I mean, that suit did cover her skin, but didn't make any effort in hiding her curves.
The bounty huntress saw Falcon preparing to jump and decided to have some fun. She then turned to Link, who had his arms crossed behind his head while he was lying in the sunbathing chair. Samus then called him and the Hero looked to her. The galactic warrior pulled out her Paralyzer with a smile and… wait a minute. Where was she hiding that thing?
On second thought, I don't think I want to know this information, so let's just get on with the plot.
"Just watch, Link." Samus said, making aim while Captain Falcon prepared to jump.
When the F-Zero racer jumped, she shot, hitting him dead on and making him shake in mid air like some kind of cartoon character when it is electrocuted. Captain Falcon got out of his position to dive and hit the water like a sack of potatoes, slowly sinking. Goroh was laughing his head off at that, pointing while his rival resurfaced, spitting a jet of water from his mouth.
"Samus, I don't think that was funny." Link said, like always, trying to be the voice of decency in those cases.
"Oh c'mon. How come you don't find Falcon hitting the water with his face funny?" Samus asked after controlling her laughter.
"Just that… don't you think it's kind of cruel?"
Silence followed that phrase. You could hear Fox and Wolf fighting in the other wing of the mansion over some insult one said to the other.
"No." Samus bluntly said.
Link sighed. He should have known better than to try and change Samus' violent behavior towards the other men of the mansion. The Hero then looked to the pool of the children. Ness, Toon Link, Popo and Nana were there. Link smiled at seeing the peaceful scenery. It would even be good to have a picnic amidst such peace.
His thoughts were cut short when they heard an explosion behind them, just past the stone wall and what seemed to be someone screaming. Samus and Link turned to see a guy flying through the air and fall with a shout of "MY BACK!".
Snake then dropped from the tree above them, falling besides Link's chair and standing like that was the most normal thing in the world (which for him it obviously was). He then lit a cigarette and saw Link and Samus' expression while they looked to him.
"Oh, hello you two. Decided to have some swimsuit fun? Heh, makes me remind that time in the Bahamas. Good times, good things." Snake mused to himself, putting his hand under his chin.
"Snake. What the hell was that just now?" Samus asked, meaning the explosion behind the fence and deciding to ignore Snake's remark.
"Just a paparazzi stepping in one of my mines, nothing really serious."
"Mines? You've put mines around here?" Link exclaimed.
"Just on the outside. And before you yell at me again, it was Master Hand's orders. It seems he got tired of hearing you all complaining about guys taking shots of you while you're here."
"But what if someone innocent steps on them?"
Silence again. Snake then put out his cigarette and spoke:
"Look, Link. I already said that to Master and what he answered was 'this mansion lives a war in the inside each passing day. Surely some mines won't kill you if you all managed to still alive until now'."
"Honestly Link, what so if some guys might get some grave injuries for the sake of us getting rid of people who would do things that won't harm us physically, but just expose how chaotic our lives inside here is and make us reflect that just maybe we could try and get along with each other better."
"Well…" Link said, scratching his head.
"I'll take it as an 'I don't mind'. Now if you excuse me, I have to say to Master Hand we caught another one." with that, Snake walked out waving a bye for them.
Link and Samus watched the spy go and went back to relaxing like nothing had ever happened, not minding the painful moans that came from the other side of the wall. Samus then supported her head on her hand, as she leaned on her shoulder and turned to Link. The Hero noticed that and turned to her, asking what was it.
"You know, you're really handsome wearing this." Samus said, smirking at him. Link blushed wildly and looked to the other side.
"Y-you're joking, right?" the Hylian warrior asked.
"Why? Is that so hard for you to believe people would find you sexy?"
"A-and what about m-me is exactly sexy?" Link asked, still looking to the other side.
"Let's see…" the Hero heard Samus making noises that seemed like she was flipping through papers. He heard she speak in a tone of someone who read something aloud. "You're so gallant with the way you ride across the field. What wouldn't I give to be there with you… A quiet type which is good looking is all a girl like me ever wanted… I droll every time I see you shirtless in your game. You're so sexy, Link…You're wolf form is so cute… blah, blah, blah… hum, seems this one was written by a boy from some 'Link Yaoi Fan club'."
Link turned to Samus with his eyebrow arched. To his surprise, she had a pile of letters near the table they put between their chairs. The bounty huntress was looking through them and reading some phrases that she obviously found interesting.
"Wait a minute. Is that my mail?" Link asked, now recovering from the blush.
"Yeah, it is. I took the liberty of taking it for you."
"And also spare me the work of reading it, I see." Link pointed, narrowing his eyes.
"That too. Am I not such a reliable person?" Samus asked with one of her typical smirks, which seemed to dare Link to say otherwise.
The Hero sighed and returned to his laying position. Well, not that he really cared about Samus messing with his mail. Most of it he either slashed to pieces or burned anyway, since his mail was always full of fangirls' letters and shampoo advertisements.
"Is that so hard for you to complement me that you have to use other people's words?" Link asked without looking to Samus, mildly disappointed the compliments haven't come from her.
"It's just that I am a woman of action, rather than one of talk. If it was for me to describe what I find so handsome in you, I would do this…" Samus then jumped in Link's chair and started kissing him like a hungry lioness, muffling his protests (why would he even want to protest, again?) and making the two of them fall as she passed her hands by his body.
Yep. That would be Samus for you. She doesn't lose time finding words, she goes there and gets the job done. No questions asked, no chitchat, no phone to the friends to talk what that alien said that his friend talked that her cousin mentioned that-you got my point so let's stop by here.
From the poll, Falcon was looking at Link and Samus doing what in his mind was classified as "swimming make out session", since they were using swimsuits. He then heard someone comment at his side:
"Lucky bastard."
Falcon turned and saw it was Falco, floating above the water as he looked at the two blondes. Falcon then asked:
"Hey, didn't Master Hand prohibit you from coming here after what happened last time?"
"Oh c'mon, it wasn't my fault. I already said I was changing my feathers."
"Whatever. Just don't start to have them dropping in the water. We had to clean it, you know."
Falco sighed and let the subject drop. It was then the two saw someone entering in the pool area, coming from the mansion. When they saw who it was, they couldn't believe their eyes. The person approached Link and Samus and saw Samus over Link, kissing hungrily his lips as the Hylian swordsman seemed to be kissing her back and passing her hands on his arms and well built chest. The person then cleared her throat and spoke:
"Don't you think it would be better for you to do it in one of your rooms?"
"And who are you to interr…" Samus said, stopping her voracious attack on Link's lips and turning angrily to whoever dared to interrupt her just to stop mid-sentence with a surprised expression on her face. "Zelda?"
Now you probably are thinking: what's of so special that Samus would get that surprised? Well, you see, she wasn't surprised by seeing Zelda, specifically, but rather what Zelda was wearing. The Hylian princess was wearing a bikini of almost the same fashion as Samus', but a bit larger not to show more skin than it already showed.
Link also recovered and his eyes were the size of plates once he saw what Zelda was wearing. Seconds of silence passed, until Falco whistled from the pool, making the trio turn to the anthropomorphic bird.
"Hey Zelda, where've been hiding it this entire time?" Falco asked.
"Hiding what?" the clueless princess asked. She was as oblivious as Link when it came to anecdotes about her figure.
"This body of…"
What Falco was going to say about her body, we will never know, because in that moment, materializing from seemingly nowhere, Ike appeared at the pool and hit Falco's head with the blunt side of Ragnell, making the eyes of the avian pilot of Star Fox go behind his skull and he sunk. Ike had an angry look at his face as he looked to the mass of bubbles that were forming where Falco had sunk.
"You'll get no sympathy from me. Pervert." Ike then shot a look to Falcon, who got a scared expression on his face.
"I didn't say anything. I swear!" Falcon said.
"You better not. Otherwise…" Ike held Ragnell in the vertical with his two hands, pointing the sword to the skies in a threatening motion, not minding the fact he was holding it inside a pool.
From the other side of the pool, Link and Samus watched all of that with wide eyes. Zelda just sighed at another demonstration of Ike's protectiveness over her. The shock finally wore off in Samus and the bounty huntress said:
"Wow. You've got quite a territorial guy, Zelda."
"He's actually just worried about preserving my dignity as royalty." Zelda defended Ike.
"Uhu… and I'm sure it's completely normal for a Princess to walk inside a pool full of men wearing a bikini like that." Samus said, pointing to Zelda's swimsuit.
"Uh… actually… Ike was the one who…" Zelda said… blushing! Oh my god! Zelda's blushing again! Red alert everybody!
"And what was Ike thinking when he bought you this?" Link asked, getting up together with Samus as he shot a look of a mother that asked her daughter where she had been until late in the night. Or simply the one of an older brother.
"Probably the same thing that me when I bought this specially for you." Samus said, putting her hand on her chest, meaning the bikini she was wearing.
"Well… hum… t-this is completely different!" Link said, trying not to get caught in Samus' charm again.
"Oh, c'mon Link. Stop being so brotherly over Zelda. If she wants to be sexy for her boyfriend, she has all right to do so." as Samus spoke that, Zelda blushed three different shades of red.
"But Princesses don't have to be sexy." Link argued.
"Oh, is that so?" a new voice spoke, coming from Link's left, though the Hero hadn't noticed that yet.
"Yeah. And…" Link stopped, now noticing the new voice. He turned his head slowly to the side and almost jumped at seeing Midna there.
This time, The Twilight Princess was using something that covered good part of her skin: a black swimsuit that melded perfectly with the black stains along her body. But since Link had already had much time to admire her when he was her boyfriend, he was more concentrated on the raised eyebrow, the crossed arms and the serious expression in the female Twili's face.
"H-hi Midna…" Link said weakly. "I-I was… I was just… It's just that Z-Zelda…"
"When did you get here?" Samus asked, trying to stop her boyfriend from inciting the wrath of her newest friend.
"Just now. Together with the Assist Trophies." Midna said, pointing to the back door from which were coming some Assist Trophies. Some were already in the pools.
Mist was in the adult pool, with her bother at her side arguing that she should go to the children pool. It seemed Mist was winning so far, since she made an angry face that made Ike sigh in what seemed defeat. The girl then saw Link and called, waving her hand:
"Hi Link!"
The Hylian swordsman cringed at the sight of the young woman. Zelda and Midna turned to her too. Samus narrowed her eyes, Paralyzer in hand and charging. Midna and Zelda turned to look at Link and the Twilight Princess said with a sharp tone in her voice:
"So, princesses can't be sexy, but you can seduce little girls, heh mister Hero?"
"That's… that's not…" Link tried to explain, but could only speak nonsense at the moment.
"Let's go Zelda." Midna said, passing her long arm around Zelda's tiny figure and making her turn. "Let's leave mister I'm-so-sexist behind." she also gave her back to Link and added, just to Zelda. "What about you introduce me to your boyfriend? I heard you and him had quite the make out section."
"Midna…" Zelda sighed, going away with her friend.
Link stood on his place, looking to the two of them with a devastated look. Great, now Midna and Zelda think he is sexist. Why did he even bother trying to keep the dignity of people when that concept was almost completely extinct in the mansion? He looked to Samus, who had one hand on her hips as she just looked at him with an expressionless look.
"What?" Link asked
"When will you accept that Zelda doesn't need your protection anymore?" Samus said, putting her free hand in her forehead and shaking it.
"But…"
"Link, give up. She has Ike now. Concentrate on doing something more productive with your life. There's more than this 'hero who saves the day and the princess' thing."
"Sorry. Guess I'm just too used with it and now it's hard for me to accept it's over and…" Link said, apologizing, but Samus interrupted him.
"Ok, ok, stop apologizing. You're making me feel like I just destroyed part of your life."
"Oh, sorry."
Samus stood quiet for some time. If there was something she thought that could ruin her day, was Link on a guilt trip, because, just like the Hero had the ability to cheer someone when the person was down or insecure, he could also get someone down when he was like that. Samus shook her head again and said:
"You know what? Let's forget about it and swim a little."
Link now smiled to her as the two walked to the pool and entered, enjoying the water naturally warmed by the sun. Finally something that they could enjoy together like a normal couple for once and that didn't have anything that could lead them to some kind of kinky situation that could latter develop into…
"Say Link, did you ever thought how long a person can hold his breath underwater… while kissing?"
So much for Link's hopes…
"What?" Link asked.
"It's just that I'm curious."
"Samus, drop the act. You just want to kiss me again, don't you?" Link asked.
"Well, if that's what you want, then…" Samus said, with a seductive smirk in her lips.
"But I never said I wanted any of it. Don't you think what we did this morning was already enough? You made me to do it three times!"
All activity in the pool ceased once they heard Link screaming that. The Hero froze in his position, looking around once he sensed everybody was looking at him. There was a shout of "lucky bastard!" from an unidentified person, who probably disguised his voice because, should Samus identify him, he would be dead in the next five seconds. Link's face got beet red and he wished he could shrink until disappear from existence.
Samus facepalmed to hide the frustrated and embarrassed expression in her features. Ok, she wasn't the most discreet person in the world in showing to Link he made her feel desire for the first time since she could remember, but at least she didn't scream about their "private activities" for the world to hear.
"You know Link, I know I'm not the most discreet person in the world when I want to show you that you make me feel desire for the first time since I can remember, but at least I don't scream about our 'private activities' for the world to hear." Samus said, speaking the last part of her sentence a little louder and gritting her teeth and, of course, repeating everything I just said. I should just drop this job…
"I don't understand." Pit, who had arrived after the Assist Trophies, using just the trouser he used beneath his toga (a vision that Pit's fangirls all over the world would die for). Interesting. I never thought they could actually be used as a swimsuit.
Huh, I mean, Pit said:
"What did Link mean with 'did it three times'?" Pit asked.
Few people would have to courage to destroy the last shred of innocent that Pit still had and that was attached to Link's image the angel had (detail: conveniently, Pit never watched Link's matches against Ganondorf, because Palutena called her captain for a talk each time there was one and the talk, mysteriously, lasted the entire time of the match).
But for the angel's bad luck, Shadow was one of these people. The black hedgehog leaned to the angel's ear and whispered to him what Link's sentence meant. The effect was immediate. Pit's look of cute confusion turned into one of pure horror as he put his hands on his ears and ran away of the pool area, screaming like he was being tortured:
"My ears! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING! Forgive me, great Palutena!"
On his way to flee the local, Pit passed by Ganondorf, who had been walking nearby, reading the letter about the last sales of his new brand of doll… uh, action figures and heard Link shouting about what he and Samus had done that morning. The Dark Lord couldn't care less about what those two did in their private time, but it would certainly be amusing to see Link embarrassing himself in public.
It was then he saw Pit running for his dear life, which distracted everybody from Link and made them look to Pit, some feeling pity for the angels, others mute due to the awkwardness of the situation. Ganondorf then said to himself as he saw Pit slamming the back door of the mansion as he entered to go and hide in his room:
"Another child whose innocence is completely destroyed by the harsh reality we all live in. Damn. Why do I never have my camera around at times like this?"
Well, that's Ganondorf for you. Let's go back to the pool.
After the initial shock, people started to go back to their business in the pool. Link had sunk until just his nose was out of the water, doing everything in his power not to call attention to himself again, hoping he could get out before anybody noticed.
Samus just stood with her back against the border of the pool, eying Link from times to times. Her anger was subsiding now, but she decided to just resume their activities on the pool to swimming, so Link wouldn't open his big mouth again.
However, before the bounty huntress could call her boyfriend for a little swimming around the olympic-sized pool, Bowser had exited the mansion and was going for the pool area, with Peach on his tow, trying to talk him back from his idea:
"I really don't think that would work, Bowser. Why don't we go back to the mansion and play some game?"
"Oh c'mon, Peach. Now you're going to say what I can and can't do? I said I want to go to the pool and that's what I'm going to do." Bowser answered.
"Yeah… but… don't you think that… you might not be suited for that?" Peach said, trying not to refer to the fact that Bowser should weigh at least a hundred kilograms with that shell of his.
"What do you mean with that?" Bowser asked, thankfully not understanding what Peach meant.
"Uh… nothing too important, just that…"
"Hey, look! Falcon and Goroh are in a competition to see who has the best bomb. I'm in guys!" Bowser called, ignoring Peach and entering the pool area. Peach stood at the gate, with her hand on her forehead and shaking it, knowing that wouldn't end well.
Samus heard Bowser shouting and look behind, seeing the big Koopa stomping fast at their direction. Certainly Bowser couldn't be thinking on…
"BANZAAIIII!"
Sometimes, I really hate my life… Samus thought as she saw a shadow passing above her and going for the center of the pool.
All people in the pool stopped what they were doing at seeing the Koopa King jumping, describing an arc in the air and descending at the center of the pool. All of them immediately swam to the borders like they were being chased by a ferocious shark. Link too saw that and his eyes widened as he tried to get out of the pool. The only unfortunate soul that was still at the middle of the pool was Olimar. The tiny captain just had time to widen his eyes at seeing the big, green mass descending from the skies.
Bowser then hit the water, sending Olimar to the tree that shadowed the sunbathing chairs. However, the water wasn't able to slow down the… huge Koopa, so Bowser didn't stop until he hit the bottom of the pool, cracking it. A whirlpool was formed as the water started to escape by the cracks on the bottom, dragging those that didn't achieve to hold the borders of the pool in time.
When all of the water was completely drained, there were several Smashers and Assist Trophies lying down on the bottom of the pool. Link and Samus got up, shaking their heads and trying to get the water out of their ears. In the shock of seeing what Bowser had did, they didn't achieved to grab the border in time and got dragged into the whirlpool, almost drowning in the process.
Bowser sat and looked around. He then noticed the angry stares that people were shooting at him and scratched the back of his head in embarrassment. Out of the pool came the voice of Samurai Goroh:
"Falcon, I have to admit: you and I lose to this spiked guy's bomb."
"Yeah, no kidding. You rock, Bowser!" Captain Falcon said, high-fiving Mario's nemesis, who didn't know if he should be happy by sowing he had superior abilities or worried with the murderous glares that some Smashers inside the dry pool were throwing at him now.
"Is it always like this here?" Midna asked from up above the border of the pool to Zelda.
"No. Sometimes we have some trouble."
- / - / - / -
The afternoon went on as Link and Samus spent the rest of the day under the tree in the mansion's terrain they generally sat. This time, Link had his head in Samus' lap, who was caressing his dirty-blond locks, admiring his peaceful and serene expression.
After the episode on the pool, the bounty huntress decided to stop with her double-meaning anecdotes and stay with Link in that way… and that bored her to no end.
Seriously, no action at all. Just stay in the same position doing the same thing for hours. How do other couples stand this monotony? Samus thought with herself. However, she could see Link was enjoying that, so she decided to put up a content expression and stay that way. After all, she already had her way with him several times. What was the harm of letting he have his way for once?
"Wow. I can't believe Link actually tamed her." a nearby Assist Trophy said. A soon to be dead Assist Trophy. "Who would have guessed he could actually do that."
"Yeah, no kidding man." Dedede's voice sounded. Samus then recognized the first voice as being Isaac. "The way it was, it looked like she was making him her pet. Seems he just likes to make her believe she's in control."
The two laughed and Samus felt a vein throbbing on her forehead. Great, now she was domesticated and Link was her pet. Deciding it was time for some lecturing (translation: lesson in violence), Samus put up the sweetest of the expressions as she spoke to Link:
"I'm thirsty. What about you go and get us something to drink?"
"Ok." Link said. He got up and went to the mansion.
Once the Hylian warrior was out of hearing range, Samus snickered almost like a maniac while she took out her Paralyzer and switched it to whip mode. She turned and saw Dedede and Isaac where still there, laughing at her expense.
Now, I'm certainly you all have been wondering for a while what Samus thinks while she's pummeling/beating the snot out/pwning/kicking asses. Let's take a look at her mind for the time being:
Go on laughing while you can, but you soon will see what means to make fun of me. Just like those Space Pirates that called me a "men in a woman's body". Oh, I hate those idiots so much. Just because I don't act feminine that doesn't mean I'm not a woman, does it? I also have to pass by what we, of the feminine sex, have to endure at each mouth.
Oh well, no use in trying to explain those idiots about my lack of feminine manners being due to my focus on getting revenge on those who killed my parents. Not to talk about my incredible luck in having everybody close to me killed, most of the time by the same benefactors that so kindly turned my childhood into painful memories. Do any of them ever stop to think that they might be the next to die just because they're close to me?
…
You know what? Screw all of this philosophical talk! It's ass kicking time!
Well, you have to admit, if she voiced these thoughts, people would understand why she act the way that she do when around strange people and why she doesn't concentrate on befriending anyone like most would do. But if she did spoke this aloud, she would have been known as the first heroine and drama queen in the story of the games and Samus would rather be mauled by three Meta Ridleys and two Giga Bowsers before that ever happened. The universe didn't need any more blue-eyed, blond girls with an obscure past or the perspective of a tragic future.
As Link was coming back with two glasses of orange juice, Samus was already back from mauling Dedede and Isaac, leaving them in a pile (with Dedede on the top) and smiling sweetly to her boyfriend.
The rest of the afternoon passed in a non-violent way, giving the two blondes some time to talk about their perspectives for their joint and what they would do once the tournament was finished. As they got up and walked, with the sun slowly setting behind them, Link spoke:
"I suppose I would go back to Hyrule. After all I…"
"Link." Samus cut him, before he could even begin. "You're not Zelda's bodyguard anymore and she doesn't need you all time to protect her. End of story."
"But, what should I do then? This hero gig is everything I have and know how to do well."
"Nobody said you don't need to stop being the Hero chosen by whatsoever. I mean, did you ever think about seeing more than Hyrule? Like travelling to other worlds?"
Link stopped and pondered about that. The idea of exploring and visiting new lands sounded good to him. He always had wondered how Peach's kingdom was. From what the Mushroom Princess told him it looked almost like Hyrule, but with touches of technology here and there. Also, he would like to see how different Fox's and Samus' worlds were from his and what was of so special in their advanced technology.
"All you need is to travel with someone who knows how to transform your knack for heroic actions into something that can earn you money." Samus continued.
"Hey, that's an excellent idea Samus." Link said, sounding cheerful at the perspective. Samus flashed a smile at him. "But, where would we find someone like that?" Samus' smile dropped and she almost lost her equilibrium while walking. "Uh? Are you alright Samus? You almost fell there."
"Are you that stupid? I'm talking about me, you blockhead!" Samus shouted to Link. The Hero felt incredible dumb by not realizing what Samus had been tipping to him yet again. "Urgh, I swear, maybe I should just stop trying to give you hints and just speak out loud I want you to come with me."
"Y-y-you really want that?" Link asked. "B-but what about your personal space and…"
"Link… we woke up the same bed this morning and went back to it right after. I think personal space isn't exactly something I can keep with you around anymore."
Thinking by that angle, Link had to agree with her, after blushing at thinking on their "agitated" morning, obviously. He then thought on Samus' offer. That meant they could keep running their joint and be together. The Hero smiled at that.
"I suppose this smile on your face would mean a 'yes'." Samus said, pointing to Link's face.
"Do you even need to ask?" Link talked back, still smiling.
"So how about we seal this deal with a kiss?"
For the first time, Link agreed on Samus' advance and passed his strong arms around the back of the tall woman while she passed hers around his neck. Link inclined his head up a little as Samus approached her lips to his, smiling in anticipation. It would have been the start of a good, old-school, passionate kiss… if it wasn't by the sound of something exploding on a window in the second floor.
Link and Samus stopped their motions once they felt a foul smell invading their nostrils. A horribly familiar, foul smell. The two got apart and put their hand on their noses as they looked up in time to her the shout of a very angered Koopa King:
"WARIOOOO!"
"And that was a message of the great Wario for you! Loser." came Wario's reply from some place within the mansion.
I think the only question here would be: how come Bowser is still conscious after a stinky bomb made of Wario's… natural fragrance exploded inside his room? That would certainly be a good topic for discussion, but Link and Samus couldn't care less as they walked further, passing the mansion's front door and getting near the other side of the building.
The two took deep breathes to get some pure air purify their lungs. After wiping their eyes and making sure Wario's stinky bomb didn't have any effect on their clothes, the two tried to remember what they had been doing before. Guess a smell like that would make anyone have a temporary case of amnesia.
"Where were we?" Samus asked.
"You were about to kiss me with a very beautiful smile on your lips." Link answered in a tone of someone that spoke about an everyday occurrence.
"Oh yeah."
The two then resumed their previous pose, with Link passing his arms around Samus' back and the beautiful bounty huntress leaning in to make contact between their lips. They were almost there when Link heard a woman's voice speak something in a foreign language. The Hero stopped again and leaned his head back a little, much to Samus' displeasure.
"Did you say something Samus?" Link asked.
"No. Now can we get this done? I don't like leaving something unfinished."
Link shrugged and the two approached their faces once more, just for Link to hear that again. The Hero stopped once more and he could fell Samus' arms trembled a little in irritation.
"There it is again."
Link's curiosity often tended to distract him from other things very easily (like kissing his hot girlfriend) once he was faced with something he didn't know very well, so Samus decided to look around the source of the noise and maybe eliminate it. When the voice sounded again, she recognized it; it was Marth speaking in Japanese.
Looking to the path that lead to the Assist Trophies' building, the two blondes saw Marth coming with Sheeda, who was holding one of his arms, with a sweet smile on her face. She replied something Link couldn't understand in Japanese.
Samus grumbled and Marth noticed his two friends standing near the entrance of the mansion. He approached with Sheeda still clinging to his arm. The blue haired Princess seemed as contempt as Samus at having their stroll interrupted by Marth's etiquette, which demanded him to always greet his friends.
"Greetings, Link and Samus. Lovely afternoon, isn't it?" Marth asked cordially with a smile.
"Yeah. I would say so." Link spoke, replying in his usual friendly tone.
"And it seems we both had the same idea to take our loved ones to a walk. Isn't that a pleasant coincidence?"
Before Link could reply and go on with the friendly chat, Samus interrupted him, already getting very irritated by the fact she had been trying to get a kiss from the green clad swordsman since five minutes ago and still hasn't got it.
"Yeah, yeah. All is good and well. Yada, yada. Now can you two get lost?"
Link was about to protest on Samus' behavior, but Sheeda was faster than him:
"Hey, don't talk to my Marth like that."
"I talk with him the way I want. And in case you didn't notice, me and Link where in the middle of something before you two appeared with all of your Japanese talk."
"As if I care about what you and he do." Sheeda replied in a sharp tone. "I also wanted to take Marth to someplace, so I could do the same thing to him."
"W-what?" Marth exclaimed, his face quickly reddening. He knew his fiancé wasn't much like the typical princesses, but he never thought she would be the kind to plan something that Samus would think on. "Y-you said we were just going for an s-stroll."
"Well, actually that was my initial intention, but I had been thinking about it as we…" she then noticed Link and Samus were listening to her; the Hylian warrior looking to the side and trying not to ignore what he considered was a particular topic and Samus with an eyebrow raised. "Hum… let's discuss it in other place, ok Marth?" Sheeda suggested, walking to Marth and grabbing his arm, dragging him away of the two blondes.
"O-ok… but… are you really going to… ?" Marth couldn't end that phrase. He often lost his composure and speech around Sheeda when she showed just how much she wanted him.
"My, my. Are you as eager as I am, Marth?" Sheeda asked with a seductive snicker that easily rivaled Samus' one.
"I-I didn't mean… I-I just… that's…"
"Just shut up and come with me."
As the two got away, Link and Samus could just stare at their backs. Seemed it have turned into a fashion women be the ones who lead the relationship… as if that already didn't happen. I mean, did you guys ever notice that women are the ones who take the initiative sometimes nowadays? Not that I would complain about it. That is, if my girlfriend actually did it.
But we don't even talk anymore. You don't even answer my calls. We don't see each other anymore. Now you just want to walk with your "friends". Well, you know what? We're breaking up and I'm going out that other friend you had since I'm sure you're doing the same!
…
Uh… sorry.
Anyway, back to the story:
"Hum… where we again?" Link asked.
Samus then got out of her reflections on how it seemed she had started a new fashion in the mansion and shook her head, passing her arms around Link's neck and leaning in again. And again she was interrupted:
"Link, Link! Hey, what are you two doing?" Samus dug her nails in the back of Link's tunic, feeling her blood boil like Bowser's after having another of his plans thwarted by Mario.
Link turned and saw it was Toon Link. The Hero got out of his embrace with Samus and turned to his cartoon self. He was also getting very irritated, but knew he had to watch it around his other incarnation, otherwise he and Samus would hear it from Peach and Zelda latter.
"Nothing Toon." Link said between his teeth.
"Oh, in that case, I wanted to tell about the people I achieved to impress today." Toon Link replied with a smile.
Link's shoulder and head twitched at that. That was all he needed; a good, two hours report from Toon Link about his achievements of the day. The Hero could feel the murderous vibe starting to emanate from Samus behind him. He quickly formed a plan not to get his cartoon self murdered on the spot and pointed behind Toon, exclaiming:
"Hey! Zelda is being threatened by Ganon again!"
"What?" Toon Link exclaimed, turning and holding his Master Sword high while running to the rescue, not minding the fact there wasn't anybody for him to rescue. "Don't worry Zelda! I'm coming!"
Toon then disappeared from sight and Link sighed. There were days you simply didn't have any break or privacy at all in the mansion. He turned to Samus and saw she had calmed down a bit, though there was a vein throbbing in her forehead, saying she could explode at any moment.
"Uhm… do you want to try again?" Link asked, a little scared of the face his girl was making now.
Samus spoke between her teeth, very slowly. Like in dangerous slowly.
"I'm fine. But if someone interrupts us again I…"
"Hey Link. What's up?" Ike greeted, coming from inside the mansion and approaching the two.
In the second Link looked to the Crimean mercenary, Samus finally snapped and pulled out her Paralyzer, setting it to whip mode and charging at Ike in a blink of an eye. Link could just watch as she beat mercilessly the blue haired swordsman.
" WHAT DID I DO?" Ike cried out as Samus inflicted some burns on his back with her Plasma Whip and kicked and punched every part of his body she could reach.
The strong swordsman let out several cries of pain as Samus continued to fiercely maul him. Link really wanted to help Ike, but he wouldn't be able to do so if Samus knocked him unconscious by accident. The beating then stopped and Samus let an Ike with a torn cape, clothes and hair burned and several bruises, cuts and broken bones lying on the floor, his hands twitching slightly.
Samus kicked him on his side yet again. Kinda unnecessary if you ask me, since the guy is already in an unconscious state. She then walked back to Link, who would have spoken something about she overdoing it, but shut up once he saw she was speaking:
"You know what? I got tired of this. Screw the romantic slowness!"
Before Link could even ask what she was talking about, Samus grabbed his face and planted a kiss on his lips, a little hungrily at first, but latter making it slow and passionate. The Hero answered by kissing back and warping his arms around the athletic body of the bounty huntress.
Now this certainly would be a very romantic final, if you don't take Ike's bleeding form on the ground into account, with the sun setting behind them and all. But this isn't really a romance fic, is it?
Link opened his eyes after kissing Samus for some time and saw Zelda, Sonic, Mario, Snake and Lucario all smiling to him and Samus while peeping their heads out of the doors of the mansion. Samus now settled for just hugging Link and putting her head on his shoulder, cuddling him her eyes closed. The swordsman took the chance while and shot an angry look to his friends, making a gesture with his hand for them to scram.
The smiles on the Smasher's face just widened while they complied with Link's requested, but not before Snake and Mario dragged Ike's unconscious form back to the mansion without make any noise to interrupt Samus and Link's moment.
Sometimes, I wonder if living in a normal place would be better. Link thought with himself. He then noticed Samus had started nibbling at his ear, making the swordsman almost purr in contentment. Thinking again… why would I want to exchange something so good for a boring normal life?
