ATE: Oh Primus! I know I haven't updated since the 8th of August, but I had trouble getting my thoughts together. Luckily I had Diamond White to help me along the way with brain storming ideas with me (thank you!). It doesn't help that college has kept me busy and I'm officially on my third week so far. Anyways, big thanks and shout outs to Crystalmaiden62, kaitamis, Diamond White, Sailor Shinzo, Mistress Megatron, Bumblebeecamaro38, sunnysides, and Dragons redemption for their reviews on both chapters 10 and 11. Hopefully you all will be satisfied with this update.
Also, because of this chapter, the rating of this story will go up, thus making this story the first one to have an M rating. A fair warning to everyone, there will be a ton of fluff, lemon and/or smut, hence why the rating went up. Again, you've all been warned.
Declaimer: I don't own Transformers or Transformers Armada. I only own my OCs Valerie and Astera.
PS: Did I mention that both Jetfire and Sideways will be somewhat OOC? With the former being a being a bit...angsty?
Chapter 12: Broken Soldier
I stirred slightly in my sleep as my half asleep mind didn't want to wake up. I just wanted to continue sleeping. I wrapped my arms around my pillow before burying my face in it, but then I realized something. Since when had my pillow been so…firm? And warm?
I suddenly felt a pair of arms wrap around me as I was held close to something warm. One arm was around my waist while I felt someone's fingers run through my hair and I shivered slightly at the sensation. It felt nice and I sighed. I felt a kiss being placed on my forehead and in my curiosity I slowly opened my eyes before lifting my head up to find Jetfire's holoform gazing at me with his gold eyes as he smiled at me with the discernable emotion I had discovered last night to be love. It turned out that my head had been resting on his chest and I felt my face heat up slightly as I realized that he wasn't my pillow.
"Morning, Skydancer…" Jetfire greeted, his eyes showing so many emotions.
"Good morning, Jet-"
I stopped when he suddenly nuzzled his face in the crook of my neck. Not only did my face get warmer, my heart started to beat faster and my stomach started doing flips. He was so close and I had a feeling he could hear my heart beating so fast. I heard sniffing a bit before he sighed in content.
"You smell good." He breathed out, his warm breath blowing on my skin and causing me to get goosebumps and shiver slightly. I had a feeling he knew how this was affecting me and seemed to enjoy it.
"T-thanks, I guess." I said awkwardly. "What time is it?"
"It's only 6:50. Why?"
I groaned.
"It's too early to get up…"
I heard Jetfire chuckle, his holoform's chest vibrating a bit.
"I think I know a way to wake you up." He whispered in my ear, my face heating up from hearing his husky voice and how close he was.
It happened so fast. One second I was laying in the same position I woke up in, and the next I found myself pinned underneath Jetfire with his lips locked with mine. It took me by surprise since I hadn't expected this to happen. I felt him weave his fingers in my hair before pulling away to place his lips on the nap of my neck. I tried so hard not to moan from the pleasure I was experiencing as he kissed, sucked, and nipped at the skin on my neck, but then I accidentally let a quiet moan escape my lips, which only seemed to encourage him to continue. I felt something bulgy pressing against my leg and my eyes widened when I realized what it was, causing my face to heat up. Jetfire started running his free hand slowly down my side before slipping it underneath my shirt and causing me to shiver as he stroke his large hand along my side and stomach. I was suddenly feeling anxious as his hand traveled upwards before I started feeling fearful.
"Jetfire, stop…" I begged, my emotions clear in my voice.
He didn't seem to hear me and I started panicking when he suddenly cupped my bra covered breast.
"JETFIRE, STOP!" I cried desperately.
Jetfire suddenly jerked himself away and I soon found myself staring at his shock ridden face, his gold eyes showing not only his shock, but shame and terror at what he realized he'd been so close to doing; the desire and hunger that were most likely strong not so long ago were now weakening.
"Valerie…!" He said quietly in shock. "I-I'm sorry-"
I quickly got out from underneath him before rushing into the bathroom and locking the door behind me. I placed my back against the door before sliding down to sit on the floor with a hand pressed to my chest in order to stop my heart from hammering against it as a stray tear slid down my face. He'd been so close to doing that and it scared me and I didn't know how to handle it.
"Valerie! I'm sorry…" I heard Jetfire's voice through the door. "I-I didn't mean to do that to you. I don't know what came over me back there." I heard him sigh sadly and I suddenly felt guilt, but I knew it wasn't mine. It was his. "I know you're probably mad at me or upset, but I'm really sorry. Please forgive me."
I knew Jetfire truly meant what he said since he'd never do something like that to me. He was just as scared and confused as I was about what just happened and he wanted to make amends for it. I had to forgive him. If the situation was in reverse (my face heated up at the thought) he would do the same for me.
"I forgive you." I told him. "It's just…we can't do that yet."
"I know…"
I got off the floor so I could grab a towel and placed it on top of the toilet that had the lid down.
"I'm going to take a shower. Maybe you can explain some things to me so I can understand what's going on."
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Jetfire stood next to the door outside the room Valerie just ran into not so long ago, only to hear the sound of water running a few minutes later that indicated that she was taking a shower. He clenched his fist as he mentally cursed at himself for what he did earlier. How could he do that to her? He agreed that he'd wait until she was older so that they could be together, but now he had just made the biggest mistake that could've most likely cost him to possibly lose her. As much as he wanted the years to fly by at the moment he couldn't make time speed up. And that frustrated him because he couldn't have her yet and he wouldn't be able to interface with her until she was older. She was still a child (a sparkling!) and he had almost forced her into doing something she wasn't even ready for!
If only she had been born a few years earlier.
A few years earlier.
Jetfire sat on the ground leaning his back against the wall before he looked down at his hands. He watched himself unclench them, turning them over as he observed the features that made him appear human to those who weren't aware of what he truly was: a transformer, Autobot, giant robot. He created his holoform so that it reflected his age if he were human and made himself appear as a 27 year old man. In this form he was able to feel so many things, down to even the tiniest thing such as the goosebumps that formed on his skin when he was cold. He had been surprised at how sensitive his sense of touch had gotten, along with his sense of taste. How was it that humans could handle this amount of sensitivity without going into total overload?
He smiled a small smile as he remembered how Valerie first reacted to seeing his holoform (thinking he was just another human that had come to see the performance she was in) until she realized it was actually him. She had been blushing when she realized she had been staring at him longer than one normally would and even after she knew it was him, she was nervous. He knew she found his holoform attractive and she acted like she did when they talked to each other for the first time in the rec room.
And it was with that thought that Jetfire's spark swelled as he came to a conclusion. She was his. She was his Skydancer. The fact that she accepted him and agreed to become his sparkmate once she was older was enough to put his processor at ease. Even if he had to wait for her to age he knew that his feelings for her would never change, if not grow stronger. He wasn't sure how many years it would take, but he had a feeling that she would be even more beautiful than she was now.
His beautiful Skydancer.
{Jetfire?} He suddenly heard Valerie's voice in his processor and he felt relief.
'What is it, Skydancer?' He asked.
{I was thinking about some things ever since you told me…I was your sparkmate. Is it possible for you to help me understand what's going on between us?}
'Depends on what you want to know.' He said jokingly before becoming serious. 'What do you know about sparkmates?'
{I only know what you and Red Alert told me. Red Alert told me that a sparkmate was a spouse or literally a significant other and that becoming one's sparkmate was similar to marriage, but irreversible. And what you told me was that sparkmates are predetermined by Primus and that it could take millions of years before you'd even find them. I see it as being like soul mates, but on a more powerful and meaningful level.}
'That's exactly it. It's like going around in life subconsciously searching for something and you're unsure of what it is you're looking for. It's only when you've finally found what you've been searching for that you realize how incomplete your life has been before you found it.'
Jetfire felt the sudden realization that Valerie felt from what he said.
{That's why I've always gazed up at the sky since I can remember! If what you say is true…then I've been looking for you this whole time.}
'See? Even after you were born you were probably still searching. At least you didn't have to search for 70,000 years until now.' Jetfire sighed. 'I remember my mother telling me before she passed on that I would find you someday, despite what I thought at that time. She…was right.'
{But then…why was it that I was so comfortable around you, along with hearing your thoughts and feeling your emotions? Was it because I was your sparkmate?}
'Yes and no. The thing is that when a transformer finds their sparkmate or meets them for the first time a link forms between them. This link is referred to as the engagement connection. At first the connection is dormant, but once enough time is spent between the two the connection starts to awaken and the would be couple start to respond to it. The fact that you feel comfortable around me, as well as us being able to talk to each other like we are now and transmit our emotions to each other, are all signs and characteristics of you responding to me and the engagement connection between us. As for what I said about you having gut instinct, it really wasn't.'
{It…wasn't gut instinct?} She asked.
'Exactly. It was actually another side effect from the connection, but it was also the final sign that our connection had been fully awakened and established.' He ran a hand through his holoform's hair. 'I'm sorry I didn't tell you this earlier. I just…I was scared of how you might've reacted if I did.'
Jetfire felt warmth as Valerie sent her emotions through their connection and shivered from the sensation. Primus, he wanted her so badly, more than ever now. But he promised to wait, he reminded himself. But he could still show a minor level of affection, right? She could at least tolerate that much.
{It's okay. I would've probably done the same thing if I'd been in your shoes.}
'Shoes? I don't wear shoes or need to unless I'm using my holoform.' He told her. What did shoes have to do with her conversation?
He smiled when he felt her mirth and could hear her laughing on the other side of the door.
{It's just a figure of speech, Jetfire.}
'Like when you said that you had butterflies in your stomach when you meant you were nervous.'
{Yes. What I meant by what I said was that I would've done the same thing if I had been in your place or if I was the one in your position instead of you. Similar to our roles being reversed}
'I see.'
{But what exactly is the engagement connection? I know you explained it to me, but I'm unsure if I understand it.}
'Oh.' Jetfire scratched his head as he thought of how to explain the engagement connection. He quickly searched the internet (specifically wedding traditions and such) until he figured out what to tell her. 'The engagement connection is literally like what you humans refer to as engagement rings, except you can't return this one once the connection has been established. So you're basically engaged to me or my fiancée until we're bonded.'
{Bonded?}
'Bonded, in human terms, meaning that we're married.' He stopped himself there since he was worried about telling her the rest about bonding.
{There's more to it, isn't there?}
'Yeah, but I'm not sure if you want to hear it.'
{I want to know. It can't be that bad.}
'Are you sure, Skydancer? This is your final warning.'
{I'm sure!}
Jetfire sighed.
'Okay, don't say I didn't warn you. The thing about bonding is that it's completely different than just getting married. Instead of being done publicly it's done in seclusion between two would-be sparkmates. It's in that secluded location that they interface and become one.' By the time he finished his explanation he could feel his face warming up as his spark beat sped up to match his emotions. 'There! I practically gave you the G-rated Cybertronian version of the birds and bees!'
He heard a loud thump! on the other side of the door and laughed mentally to himself knowing that she stumbled before he heard the water shut off. He could feel that she was awkward from what he told her, and he knew that if he had been in her shoes (funny how he was using the human impression he learned not so long ago) he probably would've reacted in a similar manner. It was understandable since she had been used to the concept of traditional human marriages. Even the concept of divorce baffled him! He couldn't understand how someone could lose interest in their spouse and leave them just because the marriage between them didn't work out. It made him realize how different Cybertronians and humans were to each other.
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I had gotten Pjs (and everything else) back on since I didn't think of bringing a change of clothes with me before my shower. I still felt awkward that Jetfire told me about bonding (he did warn me). Apparently 'interfacing' meant the same thing as having sex with someone (as if his explanation didn't imply it after he last comment), and bonding meant that sparkmates get married and interface at the same time. Then that meant that this morning Jetfire was trying to…
'Oh god…!' I thought to myself, my eyes wide as my face got warm when I realized why Jetfire acted like he did.
He had been trying to bond with me, but got carried away; it didn't help that he had been desperately searching for me for the last 70,000 years and that had probably driven him (and his desire) to want to be with me. I wasn't sure if I should be happy or frightened, but I knew I couldn't run away or at least do so forever. In the past I've run away from my problems, but this something I couldn't run away from. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to run away from the fact I was engaged to Jetfire.
But then I remembered his reaction when I told him I couldn't be his sparkmate, the way that hopeful look in his gold eyes quickly changed to hurt from the painful rejection. And I wondered if what I felt afterwards was the same thing he felt when I was giving everyone the cold shoulder after seeing that horrifying vision Sideways gave me.
'No more running.'
I decided it was time I left the bathroom and did so as I stepped back into my room. I suddenly felt a pair of arms warp around me before being pulled into a warm chest and I knew it was Jetfire who was holding me close. I felt my face heat up and shivered when he started placing kisses along the side of my neck, some of his holoform's dark reddish-brown hair brushing my cheek since he had to bend over a bit in order to do so due to his tall stature (I hated the fact I was short compared to him). It took all my willpower not to moan when he started nipping at my neck before placing a kiss over the spot he bit every time he did so. Eventually he stopped before pulling his face away, only to let out a small yelp in surprise when he started nibbling on my earlobe.
"Is this okay?" He ask quietly when he stopped, his warm breath blowing on me as he whispered into my ear. I thought about what he said and realized he meant his actions just now.
"Yeah." I replied quietly.
Surprisingly, I suddenly wanted more; I wanted him to continue what he was doing. I have never wanted anything so badly before until now. It was almost like I was craving it. Was this why Jetfire got carried away this morning?
I suddenly heard Jetfire chuckle quietly as if amused.
"You enjoyed it that much?" He suddenly asked.
"What?" I was confused.
"You do realize that I can hear your thoughts unintentionally if you're not careful. Although I do enjoy the fact that you liked what I did."
My face heated up in embarrassment from the fact that Jetfire heard what I was thinking. How was I supposed to know that he would pick up on those?
"That's what you get when you transmit your thoughts like that. Plus I get some blackmail."
"You'd actually blackmail me?" I asked, completely shocked.
"Weeelll, you never know. It could be useful on my part for a few good reasons. But for now no, I wouldn't blackmail you."
Suddenly I felt pain rush into my head and I could hear the concern in Jetfire's voice as he asked me what was wrong.
My vision faded to black as his voice faded until I couldn't hear it. I tried blinking to see if it would clear up my vision, but no luck. I looked down at my hands and my eyes widened at the fact that I could see them! Then that mean-!
{Missed me?}
I could've sworn my blood went cold as I hear his voice right behind me. It didn't help that he wrapped his arms around my waist and neck like he did last time.
{I told you that I would return, sweet Valerie.} He chuckled darkly. {And I see you've finally learned about your connection with that Autobot. It's a pity that he has to wait until you're older before he can even think of bonding with you. You can't imagine the pleasure one experiences from interfacing.}
Suddenly I felt the around my waist unwrap itself as Sideways' hand slowly traveled downward and my eyes widened in panic and I desperately started to struggle. He merely chuckled before my body stiffened and, to my horror, I found out that I was unable to move at all! There was nothing I could do to stop him as his hand continued making it's way south, only to have it stop on a certain spot between my legs. Even though I was still in my Pjs I could still feel his hand through the cloth of my pants.
"S-Stop!" I begged in desperation as I started crying. I tried shutting my eyes to stop them from falling, but it didn't work. "P-Please don't!"
{That's right. You're scared. You're hoping that your Autobot in shining armor will come and save you, but it won't matter once I'm done.}
{VALERIE!}
My eyes shot open and I was shocked to see Jetfire standing in front of me a few yards away from where Sideways and I stood. What surprised me even more was that he was in his true form, but human size like Sideways. Was he really here or was this merely an illusion that Sideways created like all the other times I've been here? I looked at his face to see his gold optics wide in horror as he saw what the Decepticon was doing to me, only for them to narrow into a glare as I hear him give off a feral growl that even intimidated me.
{You…!} Jetfire growled menacingly. I had a feeling that if his gold face plate hadn't been hiding his mouth his lips would've been curled back as he bared his teeth at Sideways.
Sideways chuckled darkly.
{So glad you could join us.} He said. {After all, you're the one who's constantly been on this little femme's beautiful processor.}
{Shut up, you slagging pit born GLITCH!} I would've jumped if I had been able to move when Jetfire yelled/growled in rage. It sounded so animalistic that I felt a chill go down my spine. I've never seen this side of Jetfire before and…it frightened me. {Let her go NOW!}
{My, so possessive of her. How does it feel, Jetfire, to know that I'm about to claim the femme that rightfully belongs to you, your sparkmate?}
As if to prove his point Sideways pressed his hand closer to my opening, causing me to whimper. This only seemed to fuel Jetfire's anger.
{I said LET HER GO!}
Jetfire started charging at Sideways (or us) with the intention of saving me. That quickly change since he was only a bit away from being within arms length when he crumpled to the ground screaming in pain. He was breathing heavily as I saw the pained look in his optics that mixed with the anger and I was painfully reminded of when I saw him die in my vision.
{You fragging virus!} Jetfire growled as he tried to get up, but ended up screaming again as the pain being inflicted on his halted his efforts of movie.
Sideways laughed.
{To think I would take the one thing from her that you stupidly chose to wait for once she was old enough. Humans and their customs. It's what's holding her back and stopping you from getting what you truly desire.}
Sideways moved his hand up before slipping it into my pants and underwear so that it was placed over my opening. My eyes were wide in horror and a few tears escaped my eyes as I realized that he was going to rape me in front of Jetfire as he was being forced to watch. I tried reaching out to him through our connection, but there was nothing there. It was like it never existed in the first place. I didn't know what emotions he was experiencing. Was he terrified for what was about to happen to me? Was he angry at Sideways? I looked up at his optics and I could see that they were wide as he gazed at us, gazed at me. I could tell that he wanted to do something to stop Sideways, but if he tried to he would only be inflicted with more pain.
I felt Sideways' fingers start to slowly stroke and rub my vulva and I shuddered involuntarily as a huge WARNING sign seemed to go off in my mind. I bit my lip to suppress the moan that wanted to escape and despite how much I hated to admit it, it was turning me on. The sensation of his metal fingers touching me felt so foreign, but the fact that he was the one doing it felt wrong and extremely uncomfortable. Jetfire was supposed to be the one doing this to me, not Sideways! I gasped when he suddenly inserted two of his metal fingers inside me and I started crying in pain as he slowly slid them in and out of me. I shut my eyes tightly in a futile attempt to stop the tears from falling and I hung my head as I started to breathe heavily.
"Please! If there's any compassion inside you at all, please stop! I'm beg you." I cried pitifully in desperation.
Sideways chuckled lowly and I felt him bring his face closer to my ear.
{That's the thing, sweet Valerie.} He told me. {There is none.}
Sideways slid his fingers out before suddenly thrusting them back in quickly and roughly, causing me to scream from the pain as he continued to do so and his actions only got harder, faster, and forceful with each passing second. This wasn't supposed to happen! This wasn't how I wanted it to end! Everything was fine this morning; how did it change from being peaceful and happy to this living nightmare that I couldn't wake up from?
"JETFIRE!"
{Valerie! You monster! Stop it! You're hurting her!} I heard Jetfire yell.
{Just try and stop me, Autobot. Oh, that's right, you can't. There's nothing you can do to save her. So pitiful.} He laughed as he continued his actions to the point that the pain was unbearable. {You should've taken her when you had the chance. She's unbelievably tight for her age, but that's to be expected when your sparkmate is only a virgin. It's completely exhilarating.}
I started feeling light headed and all I could think about was the intense pain that I was experiencing as Sideways' metal fingers thrust in and out of me mercilessly; it was as if he not only got pleasure from what he was doing to me, but also from causing me pain which only seemed to encourage him to continue sadistically. My breathing was shallow and I cried out a few times. I just wanted it all to end.
I screamed out in pain when his fingers were roughly pulled out of me as if someone pulled him away from me. I collapsed until I was sprawled on the ground. My body was completely sore and I was in so much pain right now.
{Valerie…!}
I felt a metallic hand caress my cheek, followed by someone gathering me in their arms before being held close to their chest protectively. I hesitantly opened my eyes to see who it was, and as soon as I saw the Autobot symbol on their white chest I burst into tears and clung onto them desperately since I knew it was Jetfire. I felt him place a hand behind my head, weaving his metal finger through my hair as if to soothe me.
{Oh, Valerie… My beautiful Skydancer…} He breathed out, his voice almost sounding like he wanted to cry, but I knew he was holding them back like the time he told me about Astera.
At the thought of Astera my eyes shot open wide.
"W-what happened?" I was surprised at how horrible my voice sounded after all the screaming I did.
{I don't know. Some ball of light appeared out of nowhere and managed to get you away from Sideways. Wait…is that a spark?}
I turned around to see what Jetfire was talking about and my mouth fell open when I saw that it was Astera's spark floating in front of Sideways. His pink optics were narrow as he glared at it.
{You…meddling femme!} Sideways said darkly. {I should've destroyed you the last time you intervened.}
{You can't destroy something that's already offlined. You of all people should know that.} Her voice said cryptically.
I felt Jetfire's hold on me tighten slightly as he seemed to tense and I looked at his face to see that his gold optics were wide in shock.
{N-no…! I-it can't be…!}
I must've zoned out for a bit since the next think I knew Astera's spark was floating in front of use before it formed into her appearance like last time. And I realized that Sideways was gone, too.
{Mom…! Is it…is it really you…?} Jetfire asked, unsure if she was really there.
{It is.} She said calmly before coming closer and kneeling down beside us. I watched as she smiled before placing a hand on his gold face mask where his cheek would've been if it hadn't been hidden. {My little Jetfire. You've grown so much since I last saw you. Even your father is proud of you.}
{What's there to be proud of?} I was surprised by how angsty his voice sounded. Sure I've seen him sad before, but this? This was something I never saw coming. And there was also that same tone that told me that he wanted to cry. I wouldn't blame him; he hadn't seen Astera in 70,000 years. Wounds heal over time, but they could also be reopened as well. That was the impression I was getting. {I barely even remember him. I couldn't even save you from dying all because of those Decepticons that invaded our home! A-and I almost lost my sparkmate to him! How could any of you be proud of that!} I could hear the bitterness mix with his angst.
"Jetfire…" I said quietly. I felt a few tears fall from my eyes. "Stop blaming yourself. It wasn't your fault."
Jetfire turned his head to gaze at me with his gold optics and I could see such a sad and remorseful look in them; this look made the rejected look that he gave me last night seem like it was nothing. Before my eyes wasn't Jetfire, the confident Vice Commander of the Autobots and my future husband/sparkmate; before my eyes was Jetfire, the broken soldier who had lost everything to an ongoing war that had started long before he was even born and suffered 70,000 years worth of pain and sadness. This broken soldier wasn't the Jetfire I knew (and if anything he was only a stranger to me), but his past self that still lingered during the time of Astera's death and was unable to move on despite how much he wanted to. And I realized that this was the part that he had tried so hard to hide from everyone, from the world, from me. This broken soldier of the past…no longer knew where to go. He was lost. I started crying, unable to hold back the tears.
{Valerie…}
{She's right, Jetfire.} Astera said, causing him to turn to look at her. {Remember when Optimus got hurt while protecting her? She blamed herself despite the fact when you told her it wasn't her fault. You helped her move one, now it's time for you to allow your sparkmate to help you as well.}
{But…but how?}
At this Astera smiled a loving smile.
{In time you will know.} She turned to me and gave me such a kind smile. {See? I told you that my son truly cared about you, Valerie.}
{What?} I looked at Jetfire to see that his eyes were wide. {You two already met each other before?}
"Yes, but-"
{Why didn't you tell me?}
{Because you probably wouldn't have believe her. And even if you did, you probably would've reacted the same way you did when you saw me appear.} Astera explained. {But now that you two are together, I can officially call her… What's the phrase humans use? Oh, yes! Daughter-in-law!}
I felt my face heat up slightly. Even if we are sparkmates and haven't been together for long, Astera already considered me her daughter-in-law. And we weren't even married!
{Mom!} Jetfire complained. But that soon changed when Astera started to fade away. {Mom!}
{It looks like my time's up for being here.} She said, smiling sadly.
{Don't go! There's so much I need to talk about with you!}
{I'm sorry. I'm only capable of communicating with anyone living for a certain amount of time. The same could go for your father as well.} At this Jetfire's eyes widened in surprise. {I know you and your sparkmate will be happy with each other, my little Jetfire.}
With that Astera faded away, leaving Jetfire and I to be the only ones in this place. I turned to look at Jetfire, only to find myself behind held tightly to him, giving me the impression that if he were to let go I would suddenly disappear. He nuzzled the crook of my neck with his face mask, causing my face to warm up.
{I'm sorry, Skydancer! I'm sorry that I couldn't stop Sideways from…from violating you like that! Even if he didn't take your virginity away, it still happened!} Jetfire said. {I-I was scared that he was going to take the one person that still mattered to me!}
"I was scared too… And you were forced to watch." I said quietly. Some tears fell from my eyes as I remembered the horrifying experience. "I was saving myself for you!"
{Shh… It's okay. He didn't take you. You're still able to save yourself for me.} Jetfire's vibrating face mask tickled me, but I wasn't in the mood for laughing. He pulled his face away so that he was gazing at me, love and some other emotion I couldn't discern flashing in his gold optics. {I want you to close your eyes.}
"Why?" I felt confused.
{Please do it.}
I complied, closing my eyes as I waited for whatever was going to happen next. I felt some sort of cloth being placed against my eyes and I realized I was being blindfolded.
"Jetfire, what are you-?"
I suddenly felt warm metallic lips capture mine in a kiss that started out slow and passionate before becoming deeper and hungry. I felt arms encircle me, pulling me closer to a firm form as something slick slid across my bottom lip. I parted my lips slightly and I felt a tongue enter my mouth, exploring every part of my mouth before stroking my tongue. A shiver ran down my spine and I moaned quietly as I felt a warm metallic hand slip under my shirt to rub lazy circles on my back. The lips kissing me pulled away and I felt them being placed on the crook of my neck and started biting and kissing a trail up and down.
"Jetfire…" I moaned in pleasure.
My mind started to feel fuzzy and it was hard for me to think straight. The pleasure I felt clouded my mind to the point that I wasn't even aware of the fact that my shirt or pants were being taken off with my undergarments following. I was guided onto my back until I was laying down and I shivered as a smooth metal surface made contact with my skin as it climbed on top of me. I felt those metallic lips capture mine again, a low growl emanating from the back of his throat as he kissed me roughly and hungrily. Even though I couldn't see anything I let my hands wander the form on top of me, my fingers brushing the surface of a bulky chest until I came to what I assumed was their back. My hand moved across a flat span which resulted in Jetfire pulling his lips away and letting out a metallic sounding moan before slamming his hips into mine in a rhythmic motion, the jagged edges digging into my skin.
{Sky…dancer…!} He hissed, his voice sounding strained as he spoke. {Ugh! That feels good!}
He continued slamming and grinding his hips into mine, all the while grunting and moaning as he sped up and came down hard. I felt his hands started to wander, each one grabbing a hold of my breasts before I felt his metallic lips latch onto a nipple and started sucking, biting, and curling his tongue around it, his other hand fiddled with the other one which he pinched and rolled between two fingers. I moaned loudly as my back arched up in response to his stimulating actions. But then I suddenly realized what Jetfire was doing and started to panic as I became aware of the fact that I was naked! My heart started to beat faster in fear as I was painfully reminded of what happened earlier!
"No! Stop!" I cried out in fear.
I started to struggle against Jetfire and tried to push him away from me, but he merely grabbed both of my wrist in one hand with a vice-like grip before pinning them down above my head in order to restrain them. I continued thrashing in a futile attempt to stop him.
{Stop struggling! You need to understand that I'm doing this for your own good, Valerie!} He growled. {After what Sideways did to you today, waiting for you to grow up isn't an option anymore! Having you bond with me now is the only way I can fully protect you from him!}
Jetfire used his free hand to spread my legs apart before he started fingering me with his metal fingers. He did something on one place and whatever it was he was doing sent a warm wave of intense pleasure throughout my body. After awhile he inserted a finger inside me and I whimpered in pain as he slowly slid in and out. Eventually Jetfire inserted another finger in and continued his actions while gradually speeding up until he was thrusting deeply into me roughly and forcibly.
"Jetfire!" I pleaded, the blindfold over my eyes now being soaked from all the crying I was doing. "Please…stop! It hurts! There's so much pain!"
{I know, Skydancer.} He told me in what he assumed was a soothing tone. I didn't miss the fact that his voice was husky. {I know it hurt, but you gotta hang in there. This is something that has to be done.}
Some time passed when I suddenly felt something building up and I squirmed slightly, my heart seeming to beat faster and my breathing becoming heavier as I would moan a few times. I started feeling light headed and before I knew it this intense mix of heat and pleasure exploded throughout my body as I felt myself tighten around Jetfire's fingers. He seemed to moan quietly before pulling his metal fingers out completely. I didn't know what he was doing, but I could feel the slight movement coming from his arm as he restrained my hands.
{It's almost over. Just a little longer.} I started crying again as I whimpered, knowing what was possible coming next.
"You're no better than Sideways…" I suddenly found myself saying.
Jetfire seemed to tense up from what I said and he released his hold my wrists. I curled into myself, tears escaping my eyes and soaking the blindfold as I realized how painfully sore I was. It hurt to move and I wished the pain would just go away. I suddenly felt him wrap his metal arms around me before pulling me close to his chest. Despite everything he did to me just now I didn't want to pull away. If anything I found myself seeking comfort from him.
{I'm so sorry, Skydancer.} He said, and I could hear that he was genuinely sorry. {I shouldn't…I shouldn't have done that to you or rushed things. I was just so terrified by what Sideways did to you that I became completely protective and forgot all about our promise.} He tightened his hold on me and I heard him let out a shaky breath. {I'm sorry I hurt you! Please forgive me! I don't want this to ruin our relationship, what we've worked so hard to obtain up to this point.} I was surprised when he suddenly started trembling. {Please don't leave me! I don't want to be alone! You're all I have left in this universe!}
I couldn't help but feel sorry for Jetfire. He had been scared of losing me and it didn't help that Sideways egged him on to do what he did in a desperate attempt to keep me safe. I wrapped my arms around him in order to comfort him, feeling him tense up slightly in surprise.
"It's okay." I told him quietly in a soothing tone. "I forgive you."
I heard Jetfire sigh.
{You're something special. I almost raped you, for Primus' sakes! Something like that isn't exactly easy to forgive. And yet here you are forgiving me.}
"You did it because you were scared."
I pulled my arms away and reached behind my head to undo the knot holding the blindfold in place. Jetfire suddenly grabbed my wrists with his hands to stop me.
{Don't take it off!}
"Why? I want to see your face, Jetfire."
{That's exactly why. I…don't want you to see it yet, not until I know for sure that I'm ready to show you.}
"I didn't think you could be so mysterious."
{I try. But just like you were trying to save yourself for me, I'm trying to save my face for you so that you can to see it. So for now keep your eyes covered}
Jetfire pressed his metallic lips to mine as he kissed me slowly. He pulled me closer to him, prying my mouth open and stuck his tongue inside as he deepened the kiss. I moaned quietly as I enjoyed the kiss. He pulled away to allow me time to breathe.
{I love you...}
He then captured my lips again as he resumed kissing me. Our tongues danced with each other and I heard him growl softly, which caused me to shiver slightly. I wrapped my arms around his chest and my hands met the two flat metal surfaces on his back (I realized that they were his wings). I brushed my hands along the span and I was surprised when he shuddered uncontrollably, followed by him growling before pulling away to let out a loud moan.
{Skydancer…! Stop…!} Jetfire warned, his voice sounding strained from the effort. {Keep this up and I won't be able to control what I do next…!}
I immediately stopped and jerked my hands away from his wings.
"Why did you respond like that?" I asked.
{A flyer's wings are the most sensitive part of their body, as in really, really sensitive. If you hadn't stopped when you did, I could've lost control of myself. I could've taken you right here and now and I wouldn't stop until I completely overloaded.
"You mean by overload you meant…"
{Yes, sweetspark, overloading is the Cybertronian equivalent of having an orgasm.}
I felt my face heat up slightly as I realized that I had been arousing him. I heard the sound of metal clinking together before I felt the blindfold come off. I blinked a few times and looked up to see Jetfire gazing at me with his gold optics, his face mask now covering his face. I freaked out when I suddenly realized I was naked and tried to cover myself with my arms in embarrassment. Jetfire wrapped his arms around me before I was pulled close to his metal chest.
{There's really no point in trying to cover yourself up now. I've already seen what you look like.} He told me.
"It still doesn't get rid of the embarrassment I feel…"
{Hey, don't worry about it. You're beautiful. And when you get older you'll be even more beautiful.} He chuckled quietly. {But let's focus on getting out of here. I don't know about you, but seeing the same thing all around me is starting to get boring.}
I found myself opening my eyes to find that I was back in my room as Jetfire's holoform held me close to him. To my relief I found that I was still in my Pjs. He tilted my head back before kissing me. The kiss abruptly ended when my legs suddenly felt weak and I was lowered to the floor.
"I guess everything you've been through has taken its toll on your body." Jetfire said. "Okay, let's get you to bed."
Jetfire scooped me up in his arms before making his way over to my bed. He carefully placed me on top of it before climbing in so that he could lay beside me before bringing me close to him. I sighed, remembering what happened. Even if Jetfire had tried to rape me and caused me pain in the process there was something about it that I liked. Was it because of all the pleasure I felt from everything he did?
"Well, aren't you kinky?" Jetfire said jokingly. He chuckled and I felt my face heated up as I realized he had heard my thoughts. "Get some rest, kiddo."
I complied, closing my eyes as I snuggled into his warm chest.
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Jetfire watched as Valerie fell asleep. She was put through so much today and it didn't help that she was almost raped twice, once by Sideways (while he was forced to watch), followed by himself. He'd be lying if he said that he didn't enjoy it, and that was what made him feel guilty. He shouldn't have forced her into doing something she wasn't ready for and the fact that that virus could easily claim her as his own only fueled his anger and fear. What if something like this were to happen again and he wasn't around to try and stop him? No! He shouldn't be thinking about that right now. All that mattered now was that she was safe. He couldn't help but think back on what happened with him and his sparkmate.
He had blindfold her so that she wouldn't see his face and, to a certain extent, know what he was doing. He noticed how she seemed to get a little impatient as his face mask retracted to reveal his face; she had started asking what he was doing, but he didn't let her finish and interrupted her by capturing her lips with his. It was strange how his mouth plates seemed to mold together with hers, along with the way her organic flesh felt on his metal skin. It was different, but in a really good way. He started by kissing her slow and passionate as he worked his way up to deepening it in his hunger. He wrapped his arms around her small form and pulled her closer to him before running his glossa along her bottom lip; as soon as her mouth plates parted he eagerly entered, feeling his way around the inside to familiarize himself before coming to stroke her glossa. He slipped his hand underneath the shirt of (what humans referred to as) her Pjs and rubbed lazy circles on her back, causing her to shiver and hear her moan quietly. He pulled his face away from her and went for her neck, kissing and biting his way up and down to stimulate her.
Nothing prepared him to hear the lovely sound of his sparkmate moaning his name from the pleasure she was experiencing. It turned him on and seemed to intoxicate him like high grade energon. What he would give to hear her say his name like that again!
With Valerie distracting he started unbuttoning the front of her shirt (why in the world would Pj shirts need buttons?), slipping them off before throwing them aside; her pants met the same fate as her shirt. He was surprised to find that her breasts and lower region were covered with these strange undergarment (a bra and underwear, as the humans called them). He reached behind her back to unhook the bra before slipping it off and tossing it away, followed by her underwear which he had to slip carefully down her legs in order to remove them. As soon as he finished removing every article of clothing he return his optics to Valerie and allowed his gaze to roam hungrily over her now naked body with nothing restraining her breast or her interface port between her legs. Her form had a bit of a curve to it, showing that she wasn't a child, yet not a woman at the same time, her skin looking smooth due to her young age. He could feel his interface rod start to swell against his interface plating as he took in every detail of her body, an animalistic urge fueled by lust and desire invading his processor. She was beautiful…and she was his!
He slowly guided her so that she was laying down on her back and he didn't miss how her body shivered as his metal form touched her skin while she was pinned underneath him. He quickly claimed her human lips with his again and he let loose a low growl in the back of his throat while he roughly kissed her in his hunger. He felt her soft hands roaming the metal surface of his chest plate until he felt them on his back. His breathing hitched when he felt her slowly stroking his wings, causing him to jerk away from kissing her and a moan escaped his lips as he felt his rod swell uncomfortably from the arousing stimulation. It was driving him crazy! He started slamming his hips down on hers, coming back up before slamming down again with some of his metal parts digging into her skin. His voice was strained from the intense pleasure he felt as he hissed her name out. Primus! It felt so amazing and exhilarating! The combination of intense pleasure, lust, and desire was overwhelming! He had never felt anything like this in his entire life and he was addicted to it! He wanted…no, NEEDED more! So he continued slamming his hips down on her before grinding and thrusting them into hers. His cooling fans switched on, his spark humming wildly in his spark chamber, as he started speeding up and coming down with more force, moaning and grunting while his throbbing rod rubbed up against his plating, and he so desperately wanted to rub it against her interface port instead! His hands wandered to her breasts before his lips latched onto one of the nipples, sucking, biting and curling his tongue around the aroused node while he pinched the other one between his two fingers and slowly twisted it. She moaned loudly from arousing her further before she arched her back up in pleasure.
But everything changed when her voice crying out in fear before she started struggling against him and trying to push him away. He wasn't going to have that! Not when he was so close! He grabbed her wrists in one hand and held them tight before pinning them above her head to restrain her, but that didn't stop her from thrashing. He growled at her, telling her to stop struggling. He had to make her understand that he had to do this and it was for her own good. He used his free hand to spread her legs apart before fingering her interface port, instinct driving him to stroke and fiddle with her external node. He kept this up for a few minutes before inserting his index finger inside her, ignoring her whimpers of pain as he slowly slid in and out of her wet port. He was surprised at how tight she was and this only served to drive him insane with pleasure. He soon inserted another finger inside, sliding in until his metal fingers were completely sheathed inside her and sliding out before repeating the process over. He kept this up, gradually building up speed until he was thrusting his fingers deep inside her roughly and forcibly. He heard her voice pleading for him to stop and he could tell that she was crying from all the pain she was experiencing. He tried speaking in a soothing tone, his voice husky, as he told her to hold on.
He continued thrusting into her and after awhile he started feeling her squirm from underneath him. He could tell that she was aroused since she started panting and moaning. His rod was throbbing (to the point that it was just as uncomfortable as the swelling) when he felt her tighten around his fingers and he knew that she had overloaded for the first time. He moaned quietly from the sensation before pulling his fingers out of her completely, bringing them up to his lips before licking the lubricants on them. It was time for him to claim his sparkmate as his own. He removed the plating that covered his interface rod and using his free hand he situated his swollen erection near her interface port. He assured her that it was almost over, only to be met with her crying and whimpering. He could feel himself throbbing in excitement! He knew what was to come after this! They would be bonded to each other for life!
"You're no better than Sideways…"
He tensed up from her word as he painfully became aware of what he was doing. All the intense emotions he had felt earlier died down as guilt and shame settled into his spark and processor. He released his hold on her wrists and he watched with wide optics as his sparkmate curled into a fetal position, along with hearing her quietly sobbing. He had done this to her! This wasn't what she wanted. He promised her that he'd wait until she was older to do something like this, but now there she was in front of him seeming to be a personification of the consequences from what he did to her.
He had taken advantage of her.
He had almost raped her.
He wrapped his arms around her small fragile body before holding her close to him in order to comfort her. He did the only thing he could do now. He apologized. He spilled his thoughts out to her as the grief he felt started to get stronger, and then dread set in. What if she didn't forgive him? What if this ruined their relationship that they worked so hard to obtain up to this point? What if she left him! He held her tightly as if he were to let go she would disappear forever before letting out a shaky breath. He didn't want to be alone! He had been alone for 70,000 years after his mother died. He started trembling and almost felt like crying. He couldn't afford to lose the last thing that mattered to him the most! He couldn't afford to lose his last reason to continue living! This was all Sideways' fault! None of this would've happened if that virus hadn't tried to rape his sparkmate! He tensed up in surprise when he felt Valerie wrap her arms around him as if she were trying to comfort him. His optics widened from what she said next.
She forgave him.
He let out a sigh. He expected her to be mad at him! Any normal person would be mad in this situation. And yet here she was, forgiving him for almost raping her! Something like that wasn't easy to forgive. She was something special, he told her.
"You did it because you were scared."
His spark sped up slightly at her words. He watched as she pulled her arms away and reached behind her head to undo the knot that kept the blindfold in place. He slightly panicked before grabbing her wrists to stop her. He didn't want her to take it off. I want to see your face, she told him. He didn't want her to see his face yet, not until he was ready to do so. He almost laughed when she told him that he was mysterious. He never considered himself the mysterious type, but he couldn't help but smirk. For now she would have to keep her eyes covered.
He pressed his metal lips to hers and kissed her slowly. He pulled her closer to him, reveling in the fact that he could feel her soft naked body pressed up against him. He pried her mouth plates open and stuck his glossa inside to deepen the kiss, and he heard the quiet moan she made as she enjoyed the kiss. He pulled away, allowing her to breathe. I love you, he had told her, before capturing her lips again to resume kissing her. Their glossas danced with each other and he growled softly, causing her to shiver slightly. Her arms wrapped around his chest and before he knew it he felt her running her hands along his wings. He shuddered uncontrollably, his interface rod that had be placed back into his interface chamber started to swell up in his arousal and throb painfully against the plate covering it. He growled before pulling away and letting out a loud moan from the intense pleasure that she wasn't aware of giving him.
He told her to stop in a warning tone, but his voice was strained from the effort to control himself as she continued to stroke his wings. If she kept this up he wouldn't be able to stop himself from what he was extremely tempted to do to her. To his relief she stopped and jerked her hands away from his wings.
"Why did you respond like that?"
And he told her about the sensitivity of a flyer's wings. That if she hadn't stopped stroking his wings when she did, he would've lost control of himself, take her right then and there, and would stop until he completely overloaded from his arousal. His explanation made her realize what the term overload meant. In other words, he would've had an orgasm. Her face turned red when she realized that she had been arousing him just by stroking his wings. His gold face mask came back to cover his face before he took the blindfold off of Valerie. She blinked a few times before her blue eyes looked at him as his gold optics gazed at her.
She freaked out when she realized that she was still naked before trying to cover herself by wrapping her arms around her body. He could tell that she was embarrassed by the fact that he was seeing her body without anything on. He wrapped his arms around her before holding her close to his metal chest, hoping that it would help calm her down by giving her some decency. There was no point in trying to cover herself up since he had already seen the beauty of what she looked like. But in the end she was still embarrassed that he saw her. Apparently all humans were like this when it came to being naked. He told her not to worry, that she was beautiful, and that when she was older she would be even more beautiful. He chuckled. Was it just him, or was he being cliché?
So now here he was watching his beautiful sparkmate as she slept peacefully in his arms like all the events of today had never happened. He leaned forward and placed a kiss on her forehead. He couldn't help but smile when she sighed in content before scooting closer to him.
His beautiful Skydancer…
Jetfire started humming the Cybertronian Lullaby, and he couldn't help but remember the words to the song that his mother used to sing to him when he was a sparkling.
Beyond the sun
Beyond the moon
There are the stars
In the night sky
Beyond the skies
Among the stars
In quiet wait
Home Cybertron
Rest in peace
In my embrace
And listen to this lullaby
ATE: Well, that wraps up chap 12 of this story! Just so you know I actually made up the lyrics for the Cybertronian Lullaby, while the tune for the song itself is actually the track Infinite White from the Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen score by Steve Jablonsky (which I don't own), playing at 1:20-2:39. Please remember to review and tell me what you think! And any ideas you want to throw my way, I'm all ears...err eyes! Yeah! Eyes! Don't worry! I'll give you all credit for your ideas! ;D
