Thanks for all your reviews.
Ch. 12 You care but I can't.
Hermione kept her eyes on the blonde guy sitting on the wheel chair at her door, she couldn't speak, she couldn't take her eyes away from the scene infront of her, how was he so calm about it, his eyes had the same cold look he always had, but what confused her was that he didn't yell, curse, hex, he didn't do anything, he just kept his eyes on her face, she knew it was because he was shocked, he was shocked that she was crying, for him.
"Draco…" she started, shocked that she just called him by his first name, and she could see he wasn't shocked any less than she was, "I...I know this doesn't make this situation any better, nothing I say can, but I really want you to know that I didn't mean for this to happen, I swear I didn't" she said, but she wasn't sure he heard her, as his face expressions didn't change, not even slightly.
"Didn't mean what exactly Granger?" she was hurt that she had just called him by his first name, infront of Harry, Ron, and Ginny, and still, he calls her by her family name, but she knew she shouldn't expect anything less after what she caused him.
"To force me to stay in this stupid chair for four weeks?" he yelled, she was too shocked to grasp anything, he wasn't paralyzed, and he was going to walk again.
"You're not paralyzed?" she asked, her tears stopping finally, her heartbeat slowing down back to normal.
"No Granger, for your luck I'm not paralyzed, because if I were, you wouldn't be here right now, you'd be buried someplace where those miserable friends of yours and all those who could possibly care about such a filthy mudblood, can go so they would cry and grieve for someone who isn't worth any tear, someone who is just dirty." He said, his face expressions changed from calm to pure hatred and disgust.
She couldn't reply with anything, not even ask him to leave, but she did do one thing, she lowered her head, and allowed her tears to role down, but suddenly she looked up again, her eyes meeting his as she slowly whispered "I know, you're right"
And with that, she got up, left the hospital, and walked back to her room.
She couldn't see the shocked expression that formed on his face, if he had expected Hermione to reply, it would've been with an insult, actually anything but what she said, she agreed to what he said, he thought again of what he said, surprised by how harsh his own words were, and surprised that she agreed to them, this was definitely not the same Hermione he knew, this was a Broken Hermione, and what she just did proves it.
She was broken by his words, and that was what shocked him, he had always been mean to her, but never got the reaction he wanted, which was to break her, and now that he succeeded in doing so, it didn't feel right, it didn't feel right at all, it wasn't as good as he thought it would be, it was anything but good, it felt one thing he thought he could never feel, he felt something Malfoy's never could feel, he felt guilt.
That was when it hit him, he was feeling sorry, but not for her, actually for himself, he had pushed her to her limit, and even though she warned him, asking him to leave the library, but he couldn't, he had to stay there and continue the conversation until he gets what he wanted, which was her storming off the library, but that's not what happened, she got on her nerve so bad that she had to hex him, he knew she didn't mean to bring the shelf down over him, but he couldn't just tell her that, why couldn't he? What was there to stop him?
He had always thought she was strong enough to just keep take his insults but now, his words went right through her, she believed them, she agreed to them, that she wasn't worth anything, that she was just dirty, that she was nothing.
Draco felt pain in his heart, the same heart he once thought was made of steel, the heart that never care for anyone but his owner, but now he had a new feeling, a feeling of hate and disgust, but it wasn't directed to Hermione, it was directed towards him, he was disgusted with himself for what he just did, a girl who was really sorry for what she thought she had caused him, and all he could do was to hurt her, truly hurt her, make her believe what he said, which he knew wasn't true.
"Draco…please be strong, I'll get you help" this sentence came to his thoughts all of a sudden, she called him Draco, and there was something about the way she said it, he couldn't hear hate or anger in her voice as she called out his name, but he could hear care, she cared about him enough to call him by his first name, and cared enough to go get him help, cared enough to beg him to be strong, but if it was the other way around he would leave her to die, and that was when he truly felt sick with himself, he didn't want to be like that, but for some reason, he couldn't be himself around her, and it wasn't entirely his choice, he was forced to do so, but his family, friends and everyone else.
That was the difference between them, she cared, but he didn't, he couldn't, he wasn't allowed to, he wasn't supposed to.
Well? What do you think? Please review.
