Here's the next chapter! I know the last chapter was really sad. I got a whole bunch of reviews saying either 'Awww' or 'Poor Dean!' I hope this chapter has you reviewing much happier things! Haha. I can't keep Dean so upset for too long now can I? I hope you guys enjoy this happier chapter and thanks as always for reviewing and reading! I love writing this story! Next chapter will tell what John's sentence will be and might also start Sammy's Jess visions! But I might leave that for the chapter after the next! So before I get into all that stuff, I hope you enjoy this fluff-filled chapter! Oh yea, and its a thousand words longer, for those of you who wanted longer!
Sam immediately ran through the house to find his brother, not even bothering to tell their guests what was going on. He heard Jess say something that sounded like "Can you guys wait a minute?" and then Jess was beside him in an instant, also frantic to find Dean. Sam didn't even have to look at her to know she feared the same thing he was. What if Dean is going to attempt suicide? They both heard Dean say that all thoughts of suicide were pushed from his mind, but what if this little mishap now pushed him back in his healing process? Pushed him so far back that he was now thinking of suicide again?
They sprinted down the narrow hall and saw that the bathroom door was wide open, light on, and inside the room was Dean, crying. Sam glanced around the room and was relieved to see that there were no guns, knives, or pill bottles lying around or in Dean's grasp. Dean was just sitting there, in the corner against the tub, with his knees pulled up to his chest and his arms wrapped around them. His head was hiding in his knees and he was letting out quiet, painful sobs that caused both Sam and Jess's heart to break.
It was strange seeing Dean so broken like this. Before it seemed like it fit because Dean had seemed so weak, so skinny, and so timid. But now Dean was stronger both physically and mentally, he was a normal healthy weight and he was much more open to Sam and Jess. This must be a big deal for Dean if he reverted to cowering in a corner while sobbing. Dean had been getting so much better, when he had cried lately it was just a couple of tears that he would wipe away hastily and either Sam or Jess was there to help him, to make his troubles go away. But now Dean was full blown sobbing even if he was doing it ever so quietly and Sam feared that Dean had taken steps back in his recovery. He didn't know how he and Jess could heal Dean's broken heart.
But Sam wouldn't give up without trying his hardest, he knelt down beside Dean and Jess did the same on the other side of him. Dean seemed unaware of their presence so Sam gently put a hand on his shoulder, trying to get the shaking to stop. However Dean just curled more up into a ball and shook harder, his body wracking with spasms. The action hurt Sam and sent a pang of pain shooting to his heart, he felt like he had just been ripped apart. Why was Dean pulling away from him? Does he not trust him anymore? Sam's heart was already broken seeing Dean like this, he didn't need anymore pain to his heart. You can't break Dean's heart without breaking Sam's as well.
"Dean. It's me, Sam. It's just me and Jess." Sam told Dean and couldn't stop his voice from shaking. He couldn't bear the thought of Dean not trusting him anymore.
"I...know..." Dean said in-between sobs and Sam felt his heart shatter with those words. Dean knew it was Sam that was here and yet he was pulling away from him, not trusting him. But then Dean seemed to calm his sobs down and was able to get out another sentence. "I know...I want you guys to go...have fun..." Slowly Sam felt his heart repair itself, the shattered pieces coming together. It wasn't that Dean didn't trust him, it was that Dean didn't want to ruin his day, didn't want to be a burden. Still, Sam's heart wasn't back in one piece though, it still had pieces of it that were falling apart and the only way to repair it completely was to repair Dean's heart.
"Dean, it won't be fun without you there. And I'm not going if you're not. I don't want you to come if you don't feel like coming. Dean...I'm so sorry man, I know how you feel about her..." Sam told his brother and put his hand on Dean's shoulder once again. He was glad when Dean didn't pull away. Then he slowly looked up at Sam and Sam's breath hitched in his throat. Dean's eyes were red and puffy, tear streaks running down his face but the most haunting thing was the look in Dean's green eyes. They were full of sadness, sorrow, regret and most of all, shame. It was almost too much for Sam to look at.
"Don't be sorry...shouldn't have gotten my hopes up...should've known..." He mumbled, a couple more tears escaping from his eyes.
"Should've known what Dean?" Jess asked, coming into the conversation and Sam saw tears in her own eyes as well. She reached over and grabbed a box of tissues from the counter. She pulled one out and began wiping Dean's eyes, cleaning up the tear tracks with gentleness and affection.
"Should've...should've known she'd never want...guy like me...didn't even know what dad did to me and she still doesn't like me...worthless..."
"Dean!" Both Sam and Jess yelled at the same time and before Sam could say anymore Jess spoke up "Don't you dare say that you are worthless! You said yourself that you discovered you are not worthless while living with us. Dean sweetie, I know it seems hard, but you'll be okay. Sandy might not go out with you but she is still your friend isn't she? She likes you Dean she really does, just not in that way. I know it sucks and I wish that she would feel the same way but there is nothing you can do. All you can do it get up and go on with life. I know it hurts so much but you will find other girls that you like Dean, and one day a girl will feel the same way you do. You can't always get it right on the first time." Jess explained to him and wrapped her arms around him, holding him close.
Now it was Sam's turn. "Dean, I know how it feels, your first real broken heart. You remember my senior year and that girl that would come over and we'd do homework together?" Dean nodded "Well she was a good friend of mine and I had the hugest crush on her, didn't tell you though because I thought you'd make fun of me. Well I even thought I loved her. I was so head over heels for her and then one day she came up to me in school all excited and told me she had a boyfriend, a guy who was my best friend at the time." Sam saw Dean's eyes go wide with curiosity and sadness for his brother "I let it bother me way too much, my grades slipped a bit and I was always angry. I thought I'd never find someone I'd like as much as her again; I thought she was the one for me. But as you can see, she obviously wasn't. You'll find someone who is right for you Dean just like I did." He said and smiled up and Jess who smiled back.
Dean looked at both Sam and Jess, his eyes wide. That's what had been going on with Sam and why his grades slipped and he got a C on that one test. That's when his father had tried blinding him because he thought Dean was the cause of Sam's slip. But it was a girl that caused Sam's distress.
Sam seemed to realize this the same time that Dean did. He let a girl get to him all that time ago and it ended up with Dean almost getting blinded. "Oh God Dean...I'm so sorry..." Sam choked
"Don't be." Dean said, regaining his composure. "It wasn't your fault; you didn't know that Dad would blame it on me. I'm fine, he didn't blind me, and you saved me that day." Dean kept looking back and forth between Sam and Jess. Sam had a horrible broken heart, even worse than Dean's, the girl Sam liked had picked Sam's best friend over him. Sam had also been betrayed by his best friend in addition to a broken heart but Sam moved on. He found the girl of his dreams; a girl that cares about him as much as he does about her, a girl that is Dean's best friend. Dean slowly finds himself smiling, Sandy pushed to the back of his mind, she wasn't the right girl for him. Maybe, just maybe one day he will find a girl that is meant for him. But even if he never does, he still has his brother and his friend and he figured as long as he has them, he can survive anything.
Sam watched his big brother smile and he knew that everything was going to be okay. He breathed a sigh of relief and allowed his heart to heal completely.
Dean woke up and slowly his mind remembered what day it was. January 24th. His birthday. He sighed sadly, the likelihood of Sam remembering his birthday was pretty low. This past week had been hectic for all three of them seeing as John's court hearing was scheduled for next week and plus Sam and Jess both started their new classes and had a load full of homework and studying these past couple days.
Oh well, not like I'm that important anyway. Dean thought. His birthday wasn't worth wasting the time to celebrate. Anyway, they had just gone out last week. Dean decided to go to the movies anyway even with Sandy and her boyfriend. They just explained that Dean hadn't been feeling too great and had run to the bathroom to throw up. Sam had told Dean that he didn't have to come, they would stay home, but Dean insisted. He had to get over the fact that Sandy had a boyfriend. They missed the showing they were originally going to and Dean felt horrible for that. But everyone told him it was fine, they'd go out to eat and catch the next showing.
Dean actually found himself having a good time. He thought he would feel left out because there was two couples and he was the only single one. However, he didn't feel left out at all because of Sam and Jess; all three of them seemed to be like three thirds of a pie. They're complete and whole when they're together, but when you take one away they become incomplete. Sam and Jess don't ever leave Dean out of anything, the three of them fit together so well, they're always together and you'll rarely see a time when it's not the three of them. When people see them walking down the street they don't think 'Sam and Jess the couple and the tagalong Dean', they think 'Sam, Jess and Dean-friends as well as family.'
Dean really did have a great time; Sandy was still his friend and didn't treat him any different. And her boyfriend wasn't a bad guy either, he was actually pretty cool. Dean found himself feeling happy for her. But since they went out last week and spent a lot of money Dean was positive that nothing special would be done on his birthday. Not that he cared; he just simply wanted a 'Happy Birthday Dean' to come out of Sam and Jess's mouths. But the odds of that were low; Dean remembered that Sam forgot his birthday a number of times when they were growing up. He didn't blame Sam on it; Sam was busy with school and friends. Even though Sam would realize it the next day or a couple of days later and feel horrible about it, Dean was just glad Sam had remembered that Dean's birthday had passed.
So Dean got up, showered, shaved, brushed his teeth and went out into the living room where he saw Jess studying on the couch. He was about to go back to his room because he didn't want to disturb her we she looked up and grinned.
"Hey Dean! You're up early." She told him and put her book down.
"Yea, so are you. What are you studying for?" He asked and decided he wouldn't bother her studying too much if he just sat beside her on the couch.
"Oh, I was just looking up stuff to write my next paper. Ugh, being a journalism major you have to write so much crap!" She groaned
Dean smiled "Huh, bet Sammy would love that, he never gets tired of writing it seems like. One time he had to write a 2 page paper his junior year of high school but he ended up making it seven pages long. That's not counting the title page and the references. He actually got marked down because he wrote too much, he told me the teacher said he was 'too scientific' in his writing." He laughed
Jess cracked up upon hearing that information. "Hah! That goes to show him being an overachiever isn't always so great! I never go beyond the required number of pages, I'd actually be lucky to go half a page beyond. I'm nowhere near as smart as your brother."
Dean laughed. "Don't worry about that, no one is."
Jess cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips together; it seemed to Dean she was holding back a smile. "Now I wouldn't be too sure about that. I think your right up there with him.
Dean rolled his eyes but before he could argue Sam popped up from behind the couch, nearly giving him a heart attack.
"Happy birthday Dean!" Both he and Jess said at the same time and Sam handed him an already opened envelope. Dean took one look at it and knew what it was. His GED scores, they'd finally come in. But what if he failed? Looking at the smiling faces of Sam and Jess, and the fact that they were giving it to him on his birthday, he figured that failing it was probably out of the question. He took a deep breath, pulled out the sheet of paper and looked at it. He was overwhelmed by what he saw.
He didn't just pass. He aced it. All of his scores in every subject were very close to the perfect mark, he got nearly everything right.
"Is...are you sure this is...mine?" He asked, starting to feel lightheaded.
"Yes it's yours! Look at the name on the sheet! 'Dean Michael Winchester' you did it bro, I knew you could do it! And you did so well too! Dean your scores are amazing!" Sam smiled and hugged his brother proudly. He was so glad that Dean had passed.
"Those scores give your brother a run for his money!" Jess laughed and she too hugged Dean. "They actually came in yesterday, but we wanted to save them for today. For a surprise for your birthday."
"So this means...I can like...go to college?" Dean asked, it would be cool to go to college.
"Yep, Dean. You can do whatever you want. You could even enroll for the winter semester if you want. It's not too late." Sam smiled at him and patted him on the back.
"What if I don't know what I want to go into?" Dean questioned.
"That's alright Dean, you can go in undecided and explore different majors. Find out what you like to do." Jess told him
Dean just stared at the paper and his certificate for a moment. He had passed and they had also remembered his birthday. It was amazing. "Thanks, thanks you guys. For everything. And for remembering my birthday."
"Of course we'd remember your birthday! I'd always remember these past two years January 24th was the day Sam would be constantly calling your phone leaving voicemails telling you to have a good birthday." Jess smiled
"I'm sorry I forgot before Dean. I was stupid back then, careless. I'll never forget again, you'll see." Sam told him "And your birthday's no where near over yet." Sam said and pointed to the suitcases lying on the ground behind the couch that had been hidden from Dean's view. "You better pack your bags Dean."
"What? Where are we going?" Dean asked, utterly confused
"Sam always told me you wanted to go to this one place. So we booked a three day vacation." Jess smiled
"We're going to the Grand Canyon Dean. Just like you've always wanted. I never forgot." Sam said
Dean was so overwhelmed, he felt like he was going to cry from joy. But he couldn't cry right now, he'd done too much crying these past few months. So he settled for hugging Sam one more time.
"Thank you Sammy." He whispered, his throat closing up on him
Dean would always remember his 25th birthday, and the few days that followed and how they were some of the best days of his life.
