The next morning Deacon got up and packed a duffle, throwing it in the seat of his truck. He didn't think Beth would mind if he stayed a bit. She was always bugging him to come visit, it wasn't that far to Tupelo, and they would love to see him. Considering he kept thinking about taking a drink, or more than one, he thought it would be good to be with someone right then.
Deacon needed to talk to someone about what was going on with Rayna and his sister was the only one he trusted. It had gotten increasingly harder as the weeks went by with Rayna's reluctance to end her marriage and they had been fighting about it more and more often. As he had wracked his brain trying to understand why she was avoiding it, the picture of her girls in his wallet had him wondering if he had stumbled onto something. He knew he could talk to Beth about it.
When he pulled into her driveway, she came out of the house and waved. "Hey, Deacon!" she looked back towards the door. "Scarlett, your Uncle Deacon's here!"
Deacon ran up the steps and grabbed his sister in a bear hug. "Hey, Beth, it's good to see you." When Scarlett appeared, he gave her an appreciative look. She was turning into a stunner. "Darlin', you get prettier every time I see you."
Scarlett blushed and giggled, then hugged him. "Mama, I'm going to meet the girls." She looked pointedly at Deacon. "I'll see you when I get back."
"Ok," he said with a smile, then draped his arm around his sister's shoulders as they walked in the house. He sat down at her kitchen table while she fixed him a glass of tea. Then she sat down.
"I'm so glad you're here. I've missed you."
Deacon smiled at her. "Me too. I hope you don't mind if I stay for a bit. I need to get out of Nashville for a while."
"You know you can stay as long as you like. Stay through Christmas. Scarlett and I would love to have you here." She frowned slightly. "So, you want to talk?"
Deacon nodded. "Yeah, about Rayna."
Beth raised her eyebrows and looked into her brother's sad eyes. "Rayna? Something going on with the tour?"
Deacon took a deep breath. "We've been seeing each other again. Since just before the tour started."
Beth sat back and considered that, then frowned. "I thought she was married."
Deacon looked down. "She is."
Beth took a breath. "Wow. So how did this, uh, develop?"
"She came to hear me play at The Bluebird one night and I played a song I had written for her. For us. To sing together." He rubbed his face with his hands. "That rattled her enough, but then Watty was there and convinced us to record it…."
"You mean, convinced her."
Deacon smiled sheepishly. "Yeah, convinced her. Anyway, it seemed like it just brought up all the old feelings, for both of us, but especially for her. Then she showed up one night at my house and…well, we've been together ever since."
Beth looked away for a moment, then looked back. "I know how you felt about her, I guess still do. But, Deacon, she's married, she has two little girls. Is she leaving her husband?"
Deacon shook his head. "She says she can't."
"I don't understand. If she's going to all this trouble to have a relationship with you, why not just go all in? It's not like divorce is a big scandal anymore."
Deacon looked at her bleakly. "I don't think that's it. Under normal circumstances, I would agree with you. I think it's something else."
"Have you asked her?"
"I have. She always says she can't talk about it."
Beth looked perplexed. "So do you have an idea of what it could be?"
Deacon nodded. He hesitated, struggled with the words. "I think Maddie might be mine and she's afraid to tell me."
Beth's eyes widened and she gasped. "Are you kidding me?"
Deacon shook his head. "I'm not sure why she would have done this and how Teddy is mixed up in it, but I think that's what it is."
"But, Deacon, how could this have happened without you knowing?"
"Truthfully, Beth, I was so wrecked that last time before rehab that I wouldn't remember if Rayna and I were together then or not. The timing kind of makes sense if we were. But it's really more than that."
Beth was still stunned by what Deacon had told her and when he pulled out the picture of Rayna's girls, she nearly passed out. "Deacon…." she said faintly.
Deacon pointed at Maddie. "Except for the dark hair, she looks just like Scarlett at that age."
Beth swallowed. He was right, she did. But even more than that, and she was surprised Deacon didn't recognize it, Maddie was so obviously Deacon's child it took her breath away. "You're right, Deacon, she does." She put a hand on her brother's arm and decided not to point out the obvious. "So what are you going to do?"
Deacon shook his head. "I don't know. It pisses me off to think she would keep this a secret from me. That she would have lied to me all these years."
Beth's spidey sense was on high alert. "Before you do anything crazy, Deacon, let's think about this."
Deacon glared at her. "You're not going to say it's ok, are you?"
Beth shook her head. "No, of course not. But I don't want you to go off the deep end." She gripped his arm. "You've worked hard to stay sober. Don't let this undo all of that." Deacon looked at her with pain in his eyes. "Deacon, you're my brother and I love you. If this is true, then I'm mad at Rayna for you. But if you're planning to confront her about this, you have to listen to her and give her a chance to explain."
"How could she explain this?"
"Well, hon, think about it. You were a pretty unrepentant and self-destructive drunk for a lot of years. You'd go to rehab, and let her pay, only to piss it all away in no time flat. Maybe she decided she couldn't do that to her baby. Luckily, I was never faced with anything like that, but I would do anything to protect Scarlett from hurt."
"But I got sober this time, Beth."
"I know. But neither one of us knows the whole story. I don't know why she chose to go this way, but I think you need to listen and not react by blowing everything you've worked for." Beth took his hand. "So, if this is true, how do you feel about it? What do you want to do with this information?"
Deacon sighed. "Honestly, I don't know. Mostly I'm just mad because she lied to me. I haven't really thought beyond that."
"Is it just because she didn't tell you? Do you want to be a dad, Deacon?"
Deacon shook his head. "I don't know, Beth. I mean, I love Maddie. And Daphne. They're great kids. But I don't know if I'm ready for that." He looked at his sister. "I trusted her. I've always trusted her. And now I can't. I don't really know what to do."
Beth took Deacon's hand. "Do you still love her anyway?"
Deacon looked haunted but he nodded his head. "Yeah," he said quietly.
"Then listen to her. Then forgive her. As well as I know Rayna, I'm willing to bet this wasn't the choice she came up with. She loves you too, Deacon. It also wouldn't surprise me if her daddy didn't have a hand in this, so consider that. Think about what you want too. This will change your life, so be sure that's what you want." She reached out and grabbed Deacon's chin, pulling him around to face her. "And don't go out and get drunk."
Deacon knew this would be the biggest test of his sobriety. He also knew that he had to confront Rayna with his suspicions. He decided to do exactly that when they met in San Diego. In the meantime, he was glad to have his sister to lean on and talk to. She ended up being his port in the storm during the break and helped him work through the pain and the demons to get to a point where he could navigate safely.
