The One Where John Starts Working Out How to Get Thor to Move in (and Hawkeye likes to pretend he really is a bird)

Once John had transported Barton, Romanova and Rogers back to the Avengers Tower, the next step in his plan of action was working out how to contact Thor, and get him to move in too. Or at the very least to visit for long enough for John to tell all of them at once that Coulson was alive.

There wasn't a lot of information to be found on Thor, and Pepper hadn't actually met him so John couldn't add her insights into the mix. Everything that people were able to tell him about Thor seemed to come straight out of a Norse Mythology book which wasn't helpful. He was Odin and Frigga's son, Loki was his adopted brother, he was the God of lightning, and the Vikings worshipped him and his race as Gods even though, so far as any of the modern day scientists could tell, they were actually closer to super-powered long-lived aliens. With the ability to cross time, space and dimensions.

John could feel the headache brewing before he'd even really started trying to get to the bottom of what would get Thor to visit. For some reason the file that mentioned Thor's first visit to Earth (this century, anyway) was buried.

"Barton!" John yelled, as soon as he discovered the archer's name was on the list of participating agents for that op.

Barton jumped in through the open window, swinging inwards from God knew where and landing perfectly balanced on the precarious position of the back of an arm chair. There wasn't even a hint of a balcony out of that window, but John had suspected there was more to the 'Hawkeye' codename than just good eye sight from the first read through of the man's files. Barton had a penchant for throwing himself off very tall buildings.

"You make me want to click my heels together and salute you," Barton grumbled. "No one makes me feel like that. I don't like it."

John ignored him. "Tell me about Thor," he said instead. It was more an order than a question, but that didn't stop Barton from taking his time answering.

"Why do you want to know about Thor?"

John huffed and switched off the tablet he'd been reading and wished it was a paper file instead so that he could throw it at the coffee table without worrying he might have to pay for a replacement. He placed it carefully next to yet another disappointing cup of tea. "Because Thor is supposedly one of the Avengers, and I'm supposedly your handler?" he suggested.

"You want him to live here?" Barton asked with a raised eyebrow. "You're not worried about the damage he might do, considering how unaware he is of his own strength and 'midgardian' customs?"

John just stared blankly back at Barton hoping that he didn't literally have to remind the archer of the other people he was living with. "You live underneath a man who turns into an 'enormous green rage monster', and above the labs and workshops where the same man and an insane billionaire regularly concoct things that explode, and you're worried about what a demigod might do to the building?" John asked incredulously.

"You live underneath the Hulk. I live underneath Steve, who's under you. I have two floors of protection above me," Barton argued, a little sulkily.

John continued staring at him blankly for a moment or two, hoping that Barton was correctly reading just how unimpressed he was by that argument. "What can you tell me about Thor?" he tried again.

"Not much more than what's in the files," Barton admitted. "He was brought up knowing full well what being the son of Odin All-Father meant, so he has one hell of a superiority complex, but the couple of days he spent as a 'mere human' helped with that. He genuinely loves Loki, sees him as a brother in spite of the adopted-let's-kill-the-world thing. He speaks like something out of a fairy tale, loves talking about his love of his 'Lady Jane' and, for some reason, pop tarts. I think he was spotted at a 'Save the Whales' rally a couple of weeks ago, too, so I'm thinking his 'Lady Jane' has probably helped him with some of his issues and given him some brand shiny new ones."

John frowned curiously. "And his Lady Jane is Dr Jane Foster, one of the scientists who first discovered him when he fell to Earth last year, and the girlfriend he's currently visiting?"

"Yeah. She's an astrophysicist who's studying the Einstein-Rosen Bridge theories," Barton paused and grinned wolfishly. "She ran Thor over with her van. Twice."

"Of course she did," John remarked. How could he expect anything less? Mind you, the original file did cover Thor's initial medical report when Dr Foster, Dr Selvig and Ms Lewis had found him wandering in the desert and taken him to hospital. Not only had Thor been hit by a van, he'd also been tasered, a fact that Ms Lewis had seemed quite proud of. "How much does Thor like Dr Foster?"

Barton shrugged. "He was proclaiming his love for her pretty vocally when we all finally got off shift after the Chitauri were taken down."

"So if Dr Foster was given a reason to move to New York, Thor would probably come with her?"

"Probably. But Lady Jane isn't going anywhere without Darcy. Apparently having your lives threatened, and your research and iPod stolen instils a deep, unbounded friendship in females. They're also pretty good pals with Dr Selvig who I think is still at HQ?" Barton considered for a moment, then added, "You're really serious about getting all of us to live together?"

John eyed the other man seriously for a long moment before saying, "I think the Avengers Initiative was a good idea. And I'm not just saying that because it was Coulson's idea, and he's my friend. The Earth has always had various eclectic warriors defending it from alien attack, but actually putting together a team dedicated to it is never a bad idea. America has been undefended from attack for far too long. So I'm going to do my utmost to see that it works."

"What do you mean 'America'? We're defending the world, too, you know."

"Yeah, I know," John grinned. "But you didn't really think that S.H.I.E.L.D. was the only organisation in the world defending it, surely? Did you think that the entire Universe takes a look at all the possible cities across the world and always goes for New York? You've got your bad guys, everyone else has theirs. With a bit of luck and a lot of interagency politics, it all works out." John's grin grew wider at the bafflement on Barton's face. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got some phone calls to make. And if you insist on throwing yourself off the roof, do try not to kill yourself, won't you?"

Then, with the same mocking wave that Barton had given before - the wriggle of a few fingers and a cheeky wink - John sidled out of the common area and back down to his own suite of rooms, taking a moment to lean against the wall and giggle gleefully. Oh the look on Barton's face!

"Hey, JARVIS, I don't suppose you've got video footage of that, have you?"

"Indeed I do, sir," the disembodied voice replied. Which was just as unnerving as it had been earlier during their first conversation.

"Email me a copy, won't you? And send one to Romanova too, I'm sure she'd appreciate it."

"Certainly, sir. Would you like me to provide you with Dr Foster's contact details?"

"Thanks, JARVIS. Could you find Dr Selvig's too? I was hoping to discuss with him the possibility of finding a research placement to tempt Dr Foster to this side of the continent."

"You might want to consider talking to Mr Stark first, too," JARVIS suggested. "He is aware of Thor's relationship to Dr Foster and has included space for her in the labs."

John thought for a moment about what he'd read about the device that had contained the tesseract, that had stabilised it so that the portal could remain open during the battle for New York. Then he considered what he knew of Stark, and the claim about the device's destruction, although S.H.I.E.L.D. hadn't actually seen proof of that. "Stark still has the device the tesseract powered, doesn't he?" John asked, already knowing the answer.

"I am officially supposed to tell any interested parties that such a device, if it ever indeed existed, has since been destroyed," JARVIS hesitated a moment. "But, yes. Sir still has the device."

"Excellent. Thanks for your help, JARVIS," John thanked, hopping down the last few steps and making his way to the study that was included in his suite. Sure enough, the contact details for both Drs Foster and Selvig were open in windows on the (thankfully normal) computer screen, as well a video clip of Barton's 'we are not alone' face. John told himself that using a still of that expression as his desktop was childish, and set about working on bringing in Dr Foster.

A quick perusal of Dr Selvig's file revealed that, while Loki had only had full control over him for the same time period as Agent Barton, the seeds of his magic had been present in the poor scientist's mind for some time before that. Although it had meant that he had enough of an awareness of himself to build a failsafe into the device, it also meant he'd spent the last month in some pretty heavy therapy sessions.

John sat back and bit the inside of his cheek, considering. In Selvig's position, would he prefer to forget that time entirely, or want to study the tesseract device in a hope to make amends for whatever wrongs he'd unwittingly committed? The answer was easy enough to reach, although it did force him to the realisation that one more phone call on top of that, was necessary.

It was with great reluctance that John flicked through his contacts and dialled Tony Stark's number.


AN: Not much to say about this chapter, other than I love the idea of Thor as a hippy. And that my chapter 'titles' are getting more and more ridiculous. Oops? Next chapter up on Wednesday! Love to all my readers xx