Hey, after reading a lot of the reviews and asking for some friends' opinions, I have come to the conclusion that I will continue this in the same universe. I think what I will do is I will post a light hearted chapter between this angst, but keep it in the story-line as I can actually see it fitting. I see where both sides come from, and I promise *looking at you there: Legend527 and Galp 3* I will still post FLUFF and LIGHT-HEARTED reads since thats what I intended this fic to be for. This will just be for some development of characters and a slight change of pace. EITHER WAY thank you everyone for the support and ILL SEE YOU GUYS AFTER I SURVIVE MY EXAMS.
Don't cry my little girl, one day we must all part, my departure sooner than I anticipated but remember my dear, I love you very very much.
These were the last few words her mother had said to her.
She still remembers, through her clouded vision, peering behind her drenched eyelashes, how the colours of Nakiri mansion seemed to die along with her mother. How, her father's face drained of colour and how his smile disappeared forever. She remembers her grandfather, how he seemed to have aged all in one night; and her mother, once a flower in bloom, helplessly wilted.
It has been three years since she had last seen a certain red head. She had gotten used to her daily schedule, one with no surprises…one without him. However, when he made his way to her, all these years later, the goofy smile hanging on his face was ever so familiar. She stood there, dazed. Three years isn't long enough to make someone unrecognisable, yet it was long enough for change – even to him. To her, he seemed more filled out and built but most notably, the childish look that used to always hang on his face seemed to have faded away with those years they had lost.
'One day we must all part'
Thinking back now, that was probably why, when he had announced his plans to travel around the world, testing his limits and broadening his culinary views, she had sat there silent, unresponsive. She knew, one word would have probably been enough to stop him from leaving, keeping him here for all for herself; yet she didn't want to be, no, she couldn't be the one who shackled him down.
She has never forgotten the way his eyes looked at her when she abruptly suggested their breakup. Her words still rang in her ears.
"We are from two worlds Soma…we aren't meant for each other."
She will never forget, the way his eyes blazed with anger, his golden eyes which refilled her world with colour after her mother's death seemed to have dulled all in that one moment. Helpless? Defeat? She wasn't sure what she saw in them.
She knew she was selfish. Selfish in that she was too scared; scared because of how much she loved him. She was once a bird in a golden cage, and he was the playful boy next door who unshackled her chains and set her free; and that was exactly why she couldn't bare to become his golden chains.
This was the easiest way out.
Yet here she was, cocktail in hand, standing bewildered in front of the man she had spent three years trying to forget.
"Never in a million years would I have expected to see Nakiri Erina in a place like this," Soma had said, breaking the silence between the pair. She would've been lying if she said she hadn't noticed the twinkle of challenge in his eyes.
"For god's sake," she replied, regaining her usual haughty demeanour, "it's just a bar Yukihira, a girl needs her entertainment."
And that was how it hard started. One conversation led to the next, their words filling in their three years of silence. Erina learnt about his journeys, from east to west, from north to south. He, on the other hand listened to her quest to obtaining three stars at her newly opened restaurant yet at the same time juggling her role as the headmaster of Totsuki.
She wasn't sure how it had happened; precisely, why she was lying on her king size bed, naked besides her ex. Perhaps it was the longingness they both felt and the natural gravitation they felt towards each other; or it may have been the cocktails they had, one after another. Either way, her poor decision making was the ultimate reason behind her current state.
12:05
She had already missed two scheduled appointments for the day and although she felt bad for Hisako, who would probably have to deal with a few annoyed clients, she didn't see the harm in missing the next 4 scheduled for the afternoon.
With a groan and a stir, the man beside her slowly opened his eyes. His left arm naturally finding its way around his waist, pulling her close, spooning her the way he has always done; exactly like three years ago.
"You always smell so good Nakiri," he mumbled into her ear, "did I ever tell you that?"
"I believe a thousand times," she replied, trying to ignore the tingle his breath had sent down her spine.
"I think I missed my flight," he chuckled before rolling over, "but I'll make us some breakfast now."
"You do realise it's 12," she scoffed, before reaching for his large hoodie and throwing it over her head, "I'm pretty sure it's lunch we're having."
"Food is what we are having, nevermind the specifics," the red head had responded making his way to her modestly sized kitchen.
"You never told me why you were in France though," Erina said absentmindedly as she made her way into the kitchen, her hair still raffled from the previous night.
"France, the mother of food," he replied as he carefully made his fluffy Japanese style soufflé pancakes, "it was only a matter of time before I came here."
A disappointed nod was the only response he elicited, and of course, with his back to her, he would have never caught the way her violet eyes darkened with disappointment or the sad smile that appeared almost as fast as it disappeared.
When he turned around with his masterpiece - soufflé pancakes with orange mascarpone, peanut butter whipped cream as well as reduced Leatherwood honey syrup - the sad smile on her face had long been replaced with a complacent one.
"Have a taste," he said as he placed the plate before her, a confident smile spread across his face, his eyes challenging her to admit its deliciousness.
Taking a bite, Erina could barely feel the texture of the soufflé pancake, for it has been whipped in such a way that it melted almost as fast as it touched her mouth, leaving behind the raw fragrant taste of milk, honey, cream and peanut butter. It was like a well-constructed puzzle, leaving you puzzled and yet when you look closely, all the pieces fit as perfectly as a hand in a glove.
"I see it has only taken you three years to at least become competent at cooking," she replied taking another bite, "though I could suggest improvement on the way you made the peanut butter cream."
In all honesty, even now that they have broken up, she is still that girl, too scared to submit to his cooking, fearing the fact that she would no longer be a challenge; scared she'll no longer be a somebody to him.
Soma seemed to have expected her response and seemed undisturbed by her critiques.
"I'm heading to Ghana next you know," he started hesitantly when she had finished her serving of breakfast, "you could come, as a holiday." He walked towards the high benchtop before collecting the empty plate.
Peaking from behind her coffee mug, uncertainty, regret and hesitance flashed within her violet eyes as she replied, "You know I can't."
"Of course," he replied deflated, yet his eyes conveyed understanding and expectance, "Being the headmaster has its responsibilities; I've heard a million times to know better."
The dreaded moment arrived when their taxi stopped at the drop-off zone of the Parisian airport. The driver and Soma unloaded his light two-piece luggage before Erina followed him inside the large building.
Two nights, she had made the same mistake. Not once but twice she had slept with the man she swore she would forget. Her high-school sweetheart and long time ex-boyfriend.
"When will you ever think about settling down?" Erina asked softly, her eyes downcast unable to meet his as they made their way to the airline counter, "when will you come back to Japan."
"Until I find a reason to stop travelling," he replied with a soft chuckle, the way he grinned at her seemed to imply a thousand words. Yet they were a thousand words that she cannot afford to guess.
If she is correct, three words, eight letters would be enough to chain him down. But she never wanted to be his cage.
'One day we must all part'
And with that she turned to him, a smile on her face as she planted a soft kiss on his cheek.
"Have a safe trip," she had whispered into his ears, "and some ghana dark choclate would make a great gift the next time we meet."
Although Erina didn't want to admit, no matter how strong she had built herself to be, when he disappeared yet again into the crowds of the busy airport, she felt the same emptiness she had gotten used to during these years.
Alice was walking down the hallway of the Nakiri mansion when she heard gagging sounds behind her cousin's closed wooden doors.
Her food steps halted and she slowly pushed her large wooden door open. Peaking inside, she saw her cousin in her large bathroom, hair tied back, holding onto the rim of the toilet bowl for her dear life as she regurgitated all her stomach's contents.
"Are you okay Erina?" asked Alice as she walked towards her cousin.
Her only response was another gag followed by a shaky response, "fine as one can be, as you can obviously see."
"Isn't it too early for you to do taste tests?" asked Alice patting her back, "which chef made such a horrible dish? I think his career has met its end."
"Actually, our kitchen head chef." Replied Erina regaining her breath.
"What! Mou Chan makes the best food what do you mean?" gasped a shocked and almost offended Alice.
"I don't know why," sighed Erina grabbing her cup before rinsing her mouth, "I haven't been able to keep any of Mou Chan's food down, they always taste so…wrong."
"How long has it been like this," asked a suspicious Alice, looking pointedly at her blonde-haired cousin who is notorious for being hopeless at matters that did not revolve around three things: cooking, management and administrations.
"It's been a week at least," groaned Erina rubbing her belly slowly, "I had to cancel all my appointments too."
"Erina, how long has it been since you last gotten your period?"
Alice's question had caught Erina off guard. She had never paid attention to her period, especially recently. Ever since her return from Paris she has been drowning herself in tons of work to keep her minds free from a certain red-head. Although it wasn't unusual for her period to be abit unpredictable due the constant high-stress environment she deals with, she has never missed her period for almost a month.
"A month," she replied absentmindedly as she started brushing her teeth.
"Are you pregnant?" asked Alice tentatively, staring at her cousin.
Alice's sudden enquiry caused Erina to chock on her toothpaste, spitting everything out and rinsing her mouth again she replied, "I can't be… you know I haven't seen any –"
"Oh god," Erina exclaimed mid sentence, "did I come back from Paris on the 16thAlice?"
"yeah," Alice replied counting the days, "a month since you've been back."
"Shit Alice," swore a worried Erina, "I think I fucked up."
When the Nakiri rushed back to the mansion with two drug store bags in hand, all the maids in the house looked confused yet refrained from asking any questions.
"Just pee on the stick" yelled Alice from outside the bathroom, her foot tapping impatiently on the carpeted floor.
"I AM FOR GOD'S SAKE," yelled Erina, "you do realise we bought at least 20 brands and that is 20 sticks I have to pee on."
"Just pick five then," suggested Alice.
It felt like eternity when Erina finally emerged from her large bathroom.
"Well?"
"I haven't looked."
"Do you want me to check it with you?"
Erina nodded slowly, taking a deep breath she looked helplessly towards her cousin as they walked inside.
Almost unsurprisingly, all five of the sticks were positive – two little red lines indicating there was a new life growing inside her.
Alice looked at her cousin, she could feel the air tense as her cousin stared blankly at the five tests.
"What are you going to do?" Alice cooed softly, her eyes looked worriedly at her cousin.
"I am keeping him," Erina replied after a long hesitant pause, "I will raise him."
"Who is the father?" asked Alice slowly, her red eyes meeting her cousin's determined ones.
Her query was met with an even longer pause, an airy silence that seem to last an eternity.
"Yukihira Soma," she replied with a huge sigh, she had been careless and here she was handling a situation she never imagined would happen in a million years.
"Are you going to tell him?"
"I don't know."
She knows he wanted a reason to stay, but she didn't want her, nor their child to be his golden cage.
