Chapter Eleven - The Unbreakable Vow
Severus debriefed Minerva that evening of all that was happening. She was amazed and confused, but agreed to ask Dumbledore's portrait for information. The portrait gave her the same answers he had Snape. The headmistress was, ruefully, set on sending Odessa away with all the mystery surrounding her, but Severus advised against it. The best course of action would be to keep the Charms mistress close if she really was a threat, and if she wasn't it would be a shame to fire such a talented witch from Hogwarts. Minerva reluctantly agreed.
The DADA professor also made a point to avoid Gayle's attentions the rest of the week. He could see the confusion in her eyes when he would politely confer with her and keep the conversation brief and shallow. He wanted to drive the point home to Thomas that if he was not permitted to speak to the Minister, the ministry would no longer be receiving his aid. Severus knew Thomas noticed. The Potion's master was affable enough to him in public, but Snape didn't miss his scowl when no one saw.
He was just about to lose hope that his clever plan would fail when Shackbolt suddenly turned up at his door on the following Friday evening with Thomas in tow.
"You wanted to see me?" the minister asked in loo of a greeting as Snape closed his door behind the two men.
"Ah, why thank you Thomas." Severus said.
Thomas was about to retort when Shackbolt raised his hand to stop him. "I don't have time for this pettiness. Say what you need to say, Snape. I have better things to do."
"Very well." Severus said dryly. "I asked you here to negotiate my...cooperation with this Dark Bride mission of yours."
The minister frowned. "Negotiate?"
Severus offered a faint smile. "Indeed. I believe I should be getting some recompense for my help, don't you?"
Thomas sputtered. "Recompense? Your recompense is that you don't get thrown in Azkaban."
Shackbolt scowled at the Aura. "Shut up Thomas." He glanced back to Snape with suspicious eyes. "Go on...I'm listening."
Severus lifted his chin smugly, placing his hands behind his back. "I will help you ascertain the truth about Ms. Gayle, whether or not she's the Dark Bride that you seek, and in return you will give me my freedom. And," he added with a smirk, "An Order of Merlin...first class, of course, for my meritorious service in defeating Voldemort."
Thomas' jaw dropped. "You can't be serious! You-"
The minster turned on Thomas. "I said shut up! One more word out of you and you're out!" The minister turned back to Snape, a scowl still on his face. "What do you mean your freedom? You're just as free as you ever were."
"Forgive me for my concern, but I was cleared of charges, only to be told shortly after that if I wanted to stay out of Azkaban, I had to find your errant Deatheaters. I spent two years traveling all over to appease the ministry into not changing their mind about my innocence." Snape took a step closer to the minister. "And now it's being implied once more that my verdict might be overturned if I don't help you with this task. So yes, I want my freedom. I want a guarantee that if I do this for you, the ministry will be out of my hair forever."
Shackbolt didn't look too happy about this, but he didn't try to deny anything Snape was saying. "And what sort of guarantee do you want, Snape, hmmm? What can I possibly do to ensure that your involvement with Voldemort and the murder of Dumbledore doesn't come back to bite you?"
Severus' eyes narrowed. "Make the unbreakable vow." he said simply.
Thomas' eyes widened. It obviously took a great deal of restraint, but he said nothing. The minister was shocked also. "You can't be serious."
"Oh, Shackbolt." Snape said with his cold silkiness. "I couldn't be more serious if I tried. And to assure you that I uphold my end of the bargain, I will also make the vow."
There was a long pause as the minister thought this over. After several moments, he stepped forward with his hand outstretched and kneeled before Snape. "Thomas," he said, "Bring out your wand."
After Thomas and Shackbolt left, it was nearly time for dinner. Snape made his way to the great hall and promptly sat in his usual spot next to Odessa. The meeting with the minister went far better than he anticipated. Shackbolt vowed to all his demands, save a select few.
Severus wanted his end of the bargain to include discovering the truth, to the best of his knowledge and ability, about Odessa. Shackbolt added that if the truth was she was any way connected to Voldemort, Snape must help the ministry ascertain her. He reluctantly agreed. If it meant that he would be free of the ministry, so be it.
Also, his demand that Thomas leave Hogwarts was denied. The new Potions master would leave Snape be, but would remain at the school to monitor the progress being made and to assist Severus in any way he should need. Severus conceded, as long as he no longer had to report to Thomas. Shackbolt agreed Snape could report directly to him.
And now to Odessa. Severus was no stranger to manipulation but, as before, he wasn't looking forward to this particular task. The only way to have Odessa confide in him was to be the one to confide in her first. He'd have to continue to go on about things he'd rather forget...but at least now he was being compensated for it.
Feelings. He felt and thought so much...too much. Which is why he hid them. Hid them deep deep deep where no one would ever be able to find them, not even Dumbledore or Voldemort. Hid them so even he would not have to feel those feelings, think those thoughts. They tore at his very soul. They made him weak. The two wizards he had been pit between his entire life were both dead, but that pair of green eyes would forever live on within him, no matter how many hours, days, weeks, months, and years went by from the time their friendship ended. From the time she married Potter. From the time she was murdered by Voldemort. He would have sold his very soul to have her safe and well.
Time hadn't been much help. All it did was take his longing, his aching love, his despair, his anguish, and dampen it slightly with a cold numbness. A cold numbness that, while still painful and sometimes a welcome relief, felt too much like the beginning of moving on. And that wouldn't do. He must do everything to keep her memory alive, it was literally all he had left. The trick, really, was to not let it effect everyday interactions and tasks.
It would bubble up, though. Even he knew he could only hide all this feeling, all these memories and thoughts, for so long before it interfered with his other relationships. And that was just the 'Lily' section of his mind that he tried to keep tied off, not to mention all the other irritation from day-to-day life, much less all the other shit piled high from his childhood. Keeping busy always helped, but now what did he have? Some nonsense about this American witch? Which, of course, he had to bring up his feelings and thoughts to fulfill his end of the bargain to gain his freedom?
It'll be worth it. he told himself.
But what bits to share? It couldn't be too deep, but it had to be just the right pieces in order to get her to talk and confide. At least one other thing other than his freedom would come out of this: maybe he would figure out why she was so interested in him.
"Are you alright?" a voice asked tentatively, softly. It jousted Snape from his musings, but he maintained his bored, neutral expression he often used to cover his thoughts.
He turned slowly to his left. Odessa, of course. "I'm quite alright..." he trailed. Severus held her gaze a moment, as if he were hesitating but wanted to say more. It worked. Odessa looked hopefully expectant as she leaned in slightly, anticipating further explanation.
"It's...I've had a lot on my mind lately."
Odessa tilt her head. "I've noticed you've been quieter this week...towards me, at least." Her voice was still soft and silent. "I hope I haven't said or done anything to-"
"No." he cut her off, just as quietly. He allowed some anxiety to creep into his voice, as if he was concerned about what she thought. "Perhaps we could discuss it after dinner...just not here."
"Of course." she said quickly. "My chambers then, after the meal?"
"Yes."
My [smudge],
What more can I say to make you understand? You brave, beautiful girl, you [smudge]. I have been horribly wrong this whole time. I must do everything in my power [smudge]. You know what I must do. By the time you read this, I will probably be dead. I won't leave you with details. I don't want you implicated in what I [smudge] any more than I have to. Know that what I do, I do for you, to keep you safe. To keep our world safe. I hope this will bring us one step closer in ridding the world of the Dark Lord. Once he [smudge] know you will be safe forever.
I have loved you like no other, [smudge]. You have been [smudge] my life. My world has been better simply because you have been in it. Thank you for giving me a chance, for choosing me. I hope I have never given you a reason to regret it. Thinking of you makes it that much more difficult, and yet that much easier, in facing what I must. Do not hate me for it, my love. I pray that, in time, you will come to understand.
I love you, Odessa. I [smudge].
With [smudge],
[smudge]
Severus quickly studied the letter after he swiftly read it, placing it exactly how he found it back in the small shoe box after. That letter was on the very top, dated over a decade ago. There had been smudges where it appeared tears had fallen upon the page. But who sent it to her? The only clue was the letterhead. There were smudges there too, but he could make out the initials A.B. Alan Bates? Severus was certain.
He wasn't about to go through the others, not when she could return any moment. He supposed the other letters were also love letters, but he couldn't be sure. He would have to find a way to go through the rest later. At least this seemed to indicate there was no love lost between Odessa and Voldemort.
A rap on Odessa's door shook him out of his thoughts. Well, that wasn't good. It wouldn't do to have him open her door, especially without her here. At the worst, someone might think he was breaking into her apartment and trying to cover for it. At the best, onr might get romantic notions into their heads about the two of them. Neither were welcome. And if he had to explain the truth, that Odessa went to assist some Ravenclaw student and asked him to wait here, it would sound like an excuse to cover up something.
But the rapping became more insistent and Severus was sure he could hear a male voice sharply mutter profanity. Thomas perhaps? He decided to find out. To his surprise, the door opened upon one of the Price twins.
"Oh, Professor Snape! I was looking for Professor Gayle...is she in?" the twin looked pleasantly surprised to see Snape. It was irritating, as always.
"Not at the moment." Severus said blandly. "Which are you, and what is it you want with Madam Gayle?"
"Marcus, sir." He held up a school book that was tucked under his arm. "Charms homework."
Severus snatched the book. Marcus seemed nonplussed by this. "You need assistance? What would a know-it-all like you need help with?" Severus arched a brow.
Marcus' pleasantly nonchalant expression didn't change. "We're working on conjuring a Patronus."
"Ah, I see." Severus said with exaggerated mock interest. "Well, let me save you a trip." He sharply thrust the book back into Marcus' arms. "Think. Happy. Thoughts."
After slamming the door abruptly in the twin's face, Severus turned on his heel and stalked back to where he found the box of letters to check again that he left everything as he found it. He had.
Snape had been going over her entire small apartment since she left. The box of letters was the only thing of significance he'd found. The rest was mundane: a variety of clothes, books (all without any titles or words, save school curriculum...interesting), jewelry, dish ware, wine, and toiletries (smelling of honey and jasmine, of course). Nothing out of the ordinary, except most her clothing and accessories seemed to be very fashionable, which usually meant quite expensive. Yet from what he noticed, she wore rather plain clothing from day to day. Mmmm...
He very much hoped he would find that curious wand, but either it was extremely well concealed or it had been returned to the owner. He realized just then that he had never seen her own wand. Maybe that might hold a clue...anything would be helpful at this point. He knew the ministry would expect him to be thorough. Shackbolt gave him the file on Odessa, but that was full of information he already knew. Not helpful at all.
He was sitting by the fire, elbows propped on either side with his fingers steepled and resting against his mouth, staring with narrowed eyes at the glowing raven on the wall, when Odessa breezed back in.
"I'm so sorry about that Severus." She took the chair opposite of him with an apologetic smile. "Now, where were we?"
