A/N: Lyn: Er, no, I'm not a homophobe, and rednecks/hillbillies/Southerners aren't homophobes, either. That's a stereotypical generalization, like saying we're all stupid or something. I have friends who are gay, straight, and bi. I just really don't want to hear about it -- and I don't want to hear the dirt on straight couples, either, for that matter.
Me: Yeah, anyway, this fic is gona end soon. We only have like.. five or something like that chapters left. Anyway, review!
Lyn: Oh, and don't forget the secret end chapter, the secret of which we are guarding with our lives!
Me: ... Uhh, I totally didn't sell the secret on eBay with my mind and my soul and my conscience and some dude named Bob bought them...
--
The big blue screen changed to:
"CATFIGHT
BY KATERINA
HEHEHEHEH"
Round one
"Round one," Reneey laughed, and Lyn smacked her upside the head.
Come on, put your money down
"Er, I would, but then the whole room would be filled with money," Seto mumbled.
"I have ten bucks!" Reneey cried.
"Hey, I'm missing ten bucks!" Seto declared.
Won't stop till I get you on the ground
"We all know what that means," Duke laughed.
"No, it doesn't, idget!"
If you're looking for a cat fight
"Oh, naturally," Lyn grumbled, rolling her eyes.
"What's cat fight?" Yugi asked.
"I don't know," Atem admitted, blinking. "Lyn, what's a cat fight?"
Girl, you're gonna get one from me
Blink.
Blink.
Blink.
Round two
"What's with these rounds?" Marik asked.
I heard you fuck my love
"Enough with the dadburned cursing!" Lyn grumbled.
You kiss and tell
"Most girls do that, it gets annoying," Lyn hmphed.
Now you can kiss my glove
"Oh, like on Bugs Bunny, when Bugs took off his glove and slapped Elmer in the face?"
"That was a challenge to a duel, Rea..."
"Who's Bugs Bunny and Elmer?" Malik asked while trying not to get killed by Bakura.
If you're looking for a cat fight
"I am!" Duke and Tristan raised their hands, and received a glare from Lyn.
Get your ass out in front of the referee
"This ain't no sport!" Ryou yelled.
(Let's go)
"Sure!" Reneey grabbed Malik, but before she could drag him off again, Bakura grabbed HER and dragged her somewhere he could keep an eye on her.
Cat fight, I'm scratching on your doors tonight
Joey accented this point by scratching on the microphone, and Seto snapped, "Careful, mutt! That's expensive!"
Wrong state, you shouldn't break this kitten's heart
"Kittens? Noo, kittens are cute!" Marik said, grinning, and everyone backed away.
Bad move, I'm gonna stop your filthy move
"Okay, didn't need that mental picture," Lyn sweatdropped.
So meow, meow
"Oh, kittens! Where!?" Marik looked around.
Lyn gave Malik a sideways glance and asked, "Is he gonna go all Alf and eat them or something?"
I'm gonna getcha back somehow
"Getting back at ppl is fun," Reneey said, grinning.
"PPL?" Bakura asked, blinking.
"People," Reneey said in her Russian accent.
"Piple?" Bakura blinked.
"She means people!" Lyn snapped. "Honestly, you're her father!"
Round three
"What's round three?" Ryou asked.
Bakura looked at him for a moment and then said, "I'll tell you when you're older."
Come on, make some noise for me (meow)
"Don't. Even. Think. About. It. Tombkeeper," Bakura growled.
You're black and blue
"I'll make you black and blue if you don't shut up about kittens!" Lyn snapped at Marik who was presently rambling about kittens and wouldn't shut up. "But seriously.. you're not gonna go all Alf and eat them, are you? 'Cuz if you do, I'll have to kill you for cruelty to animals..."
With my stiletto on your back
"Youch, that's gotta hurt," Mai said.
"I used to have a stiletto!" Reneey grinned.
Lyn gave them both a strange sort of sideways look, then grinned. "I had a stiletto blade, but never a stiletto heel."
Several people, including Tea, Duke, and Serenity, took a few shifty steps away from Lyn. And they had always thought that Reneey was the dangerous one...
You were looking for a cat fight
"WHERE!?" Tristan and Duke yelled.
I got no mercy for you tonight
"Mercy is weakness," Bakura spat.
Cat fight, I'm scratching at your door tonight
"Anyone who leaves any marks on my house is going to pay for it!" Seto yelled.
Wrong start, you shouldn't break this kitten's heart
"Oh, kit --"
"Don't even start it again!" Lyn yelled at Marik.
Bad move, I'm gonna stop your filthy groove
"Oh, Lynni, remember Groovy Love from Scooby Doo and the Alien Invaders?" Reneey asked, grinning, and Lyn snickered.
So meow, meow, I'm gonna getcha back somehow
"PPL?" Bakura asked, blinking.
"It doesn't sound right when you say it, Daddy," Reneey sweatdropped.
Catfight, I'm getting back what's mine tonight
"That reminds me soo much of Youko..."
"Who's Youko!?" Malik demanded, and Bakura laughed.
"See!? I knew you were just a phase!"
"Um, Daddy? .. Yeah, Youko Kurama is.. an anime character..."
Wrong start, you shouldn't break this kitten's heart
"Ya know, with animal testing, some cats hearts are killed," Reneey said.
I won't stop
"Stop at what?" Duke asked.
Till I show you who's the bitch on top
"BDSM!" Reneey yelled, earning her yet another smack upside the head.
So meow, meow, I'm gonna getcha back somehow
"PPL?" Atem asked.
"Yeah, it just doesn't sound right when dads say IM talk," Lyn said with a sigh.
I got a tip of your clever trick
"Nobody can stop my clever tricks," Bakura said, smirking, and Reneey and Lyn had to bite their tongues to keep from laughing.
Nothing left to do
"Actually, there are," Reneey said. "Other alternatives from cat fighting..."
"Like what?" Duke asked.
"Punch their lights out and get it over with," Lyn suggested, shrugging.
So I'm here to make your nightmares come true
"Stereotypical evil person!" Reneey gasped, pointing at Joey.
It ain't right
"No, we shouldn't fight!" Yugi agreed, pouting. "It's wrong!"
But I'm willing to fight
"No! Fighting bad!"
And I'll even scratch and bite
Malik winced as a mark on his back started to ache from -- (Lyn: OKAY, TOO MUCH INFORMATION, RENEEY! Me: -sticks out tongue-)
So hold be back, I'll go crazy like that
"Being crazy is fun," Lyn said, grinning.
And I'll stop at nothing once I attack
"Daddy," Reneey pouted.
"No!" Bakura snapped.
Let the situation out of the ring
"What ring? There's a ring?" Mokuba asked, blinking. "Lyn, YOU'RE MARRIED TO SETO!?"
Lyn and Seto both blinked and stared at him, and Atem yelled, "WHAT!?"
I feel I gotta do my thing
"Well, duh," Mai said, rolling her eyes. "That's what teenage girls do..."
I'll make you wish that
You never set your thin lips on him
(you bitch)
"Argh, again with the cursing?" Lyn sighed.
Catfight, I'm scratching on your door tonight
"NOBODY EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!" Seto yelled.
Wrong start, you shouldn't break this kitten's heart
"Nobody ever broke my heart," Mai said, smirking.
Yeah, 'cuz you break theirs, Lyn thought with a dark glance at the blond.
Bad move, I'm gonna stop your filthy groove
"Grooovy, grooovy," Reneey sang the song from Scooby Doo and the Alien Invaders.
So meow, meow, I'm gonna getcha back somehow
"Revenge is like a forest; you could get lost in it. Taken from Kill Bill Volume one," Reneey said, grinning.
"WHO'S BILL!?" Malik demanded... again.
Cat fight, I'm getting back what's mine tonight
"This could be taken in a perverted way," Duke said, and Lyn stared at him, blinking.
"Reneey? You're not gonna say anything?"
"Huh?"
"IT'S THE SEVENTH SIGN OF THE APOCALYPSE! RENEEY DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING PERVERTED!"
"What's an apocalypse?" Tristan asked, blinking.
Wrong start, you shouldn't break this kitten's heart
"Breaking hearts are evil.. unless they deserve it," Reneey sighed.
I won't stop, till I show you who's the bitch on top
"Ya know, when Joey is in a dog suit, he technically is --"
"DON'T NEED THE MENTAL IMAGE, THANKS!" Lyn yelled over Reneey's statement.
So meow meow, I'm gonna getcha back somehow
Ryou grinned as Joey passed out and jumped up onto the stage. "I CALL NEXT!"
